door to happiness

Li Xiangyu has indeed moved to my house, but there seems to be a gap between him and me that will never be bridged.When he was sleeping out in the past, I occasionally went to live with him for a day or two.Even though they live under the same roof, they have nothing to say—of course I mean love words!Because there is always the embarrassment of being encountered by parents.

After dinner, Li Xiangyu went back to his study—his bedroom was converted from a study.There is a long row of bookshelves inside, and there are all kinds of books on the bookshelves.Plus a bed and a dresser, it became his bedroom.I always feel that I have wronged him, but he feels very comfortable—probably because he loves to read books.

After taking a shower, I also sneaked into the study, took a copy of "Three Kingdoms" from the bookshelf, and tasted it carefully.To be honest, I don't have the heart to read, and my eyes are always on his back who is serious about reading. "Three Kingdoms" was boring, so I simply closed the book, leaned against the dressing table, rested my chin, and slowly appreciated it.

Less than 10 minutes after I came in, my mother pushed the door in with a fruit plate in her hand: "Xiangyu, Ah Hong, I'm eating fruit! Mom bought it at the fruit market in the afternoon, it's so fresh!"

"Thank you mom!" Li Xiangyu was polite, picked a banana from the fruit plate very politely, and continued to read his book.That politeness is obviously not what a normal mother and child should have.

Mom put the fruit on the dressing table and glanced at the book in my hand: "Go back to the room when you find the book, why are you standing here all the time? Don't interfere with Xiangyu's homework. I said, Ah Hong, can you learn Xue Xiangyu, work hard. You will be a senior next year, so don’t fail me! Even though the school is not very good, you should at least get back my college diploma!”

I knew that this was my mother's "eviction order" to implement "personnel supervision", so I had no choice but to go back to the room.I'm not afraid of him, I just don't want to quarrel with her.The home needed to be "quiet and peaceful," as Dad said.

That night, I was bored playing with my mobile phone, and I didn't feel sleepy.It was already three o'clock in the morning, and suddenly, the door of the study creaked.I jumped up instinctively, and opened the door vigilantly, only to see Li Xiangyu walking out on tiptoe.I also tiptoed over, and the two looked at each other with a faint smile.

I lowered my voice: "It's so late, why haven't you slept yet?"

"I'm a little thirsty, I want to come out to find water to drink, how about you?"

"Here's water for you!" After that, I put my arms around his neck and kissed him.

It's a good time for a long drought and rain!We haven't kissed since he moved into my house.At school, we basically had no time to be together except for eating together at noon.At night, we are strictly "supervised" by our parents.We hugged tightly, kissed frantically, feeling each other's breath.

The lights in the hall suddenly came on, and in the Langlang hall, I saw my father in pajamas, looking at us coldly.Those eyes were deep and indifferent, and I couldn't help shivering.At this moment, the first thing Li Xiangyu and I thought of was to escape.We fled back to our bedroom with lightning speed.

Since then, Li Xiangyu has never been willing to "have an affair" with me, probably because he was criticized by his father and "restrained"!

I was a little lost, thinking about Li Xiangyu all day long, I couldn't get rid of that handsome figure no matter how hard I tried, even when I was a part-time job, I even identified the wrong model and was criticized by the supervisor.However, I am like a robot without energy, just a "waste shell".I remember Li Xiangyu clearly said that love is not the whole of life.I also tried to divert my attention, but I couldn't calm down.

Today, I don't know how I walked, but I came to the "Blue House" Gay Bar.I hate this place, but I am attached to it.Only people here have the same blood and the same desire as mine.This is a demonized world, but it is also a world that cannot be more real.

Inside, it is full of radiance, sensuality, and desire is flowing everywhere.I just sat quietly in a corner of the bar, watching those people squirm and make various provocative movements.Those expressions, those eyes, and those movements all say "I'm lonely".But what about the love behind loneliness?Where is love?

It turned out that what they danced was not dancing, but loneliness; it turned out that what they drank was not wine, but loneliness!

Those who strike up a conversation came over again with glasses of wine, but, having learned from the past, I never dared to touch wine again.A few hooligan-like men gathered around, provoking and demonstrating, as if I had to be beaten if I didn't drink.To hell with you, what's bothering you if I don't drink?Why should I give you face!

I sneered, put my legs on the table, and leaned back as much as possible.

"This is a friend of mine! He never drinks. I brought him here to see the world, and he will give me some noodles!" The man was about to show his power, but someone had already stepped forward to block him.I opened my eyes and saw a man in his early forties standing between us.I sneered, what friend, don't you just want to eat my tofu, what's the difference from those gangsters?

I still closed my eyes slightly and turned a deaf ear.

"This is your territory, so I'll give you this face! Boss, we have shown our sincerity, don't you have to show our sincerity too? Send me a few dozen drinks!"

"okay!"

It seems that such a fight was resolved with just a few dozen drinks.Calm things down, this seems to be a compliment, but why do I feel cowardly everywhere between the lines?

"Those people are not something you can mess with! This is the room card, you go and sit inside for a while, and leave later!"

The man handed me a room card—a VIP room card!I despise them from the bottom of my heart.It was like this last time, and it's like this again this time!Well, knowing that there are tigers in the mountains, I prefer to go to the mountains of tigers!I'd like to see what tricks you guys are trying to play this time.

I entered the VIP room and started singing K crazily!

After a long time, without being pushed away, an acquaintance walked in - Cheng Hui.

I was stunned, how did he know I was here?Could it be that he opened this bar!

He picked up the microphone next to me and sang wildly with me!We sang thirty or forty songs before we stopped.The two were so tired that they fell down on the sofa and smiled at each other.

"The boss called me and said you were causing trouble here, so I rushed over here. I thought you would never come here again in your life, why did you come here suddenly? Did something happen?"

I looked at my watch. It was already past two o'clock in the morning. I couldn't help being curious: "You can still come out so late? Does your wife doubt it?"

"It's just tacit understanding! She must know it, but she just doesn't want to find out! When a person asks for something, that's a weakness. She may want to keep the family, or she may not save face. No matter what , She wants to keep this family. As long as I don't go too far, she won't ask for a divorce." He straightened his tie, full of confidence.I hate this kind of people, always love to take advantage of other people's weaknesses, such as my father.

"me……"

"Did you break up?"

"No! I'm not broken in love!"

"It's written on your face!"

"My dad has already recognized my identity and agreed to our relationship, but the prerequisite is that his parents also agree with his identity."

"That's a good thing! You've made a good start!"

I shook my head: "It is said that there are tens of millions of comrades in China, but how many of them are really out of the closet? Just because I can come out successfully does not mean that he can also come out successfully. His family is from the countryside, and his parents are farmers. He It seems that I don't have the courage to come out! I don't see hope at all."

"If you know there is no result, then let it go decisively! Find someone who has also come out, and maybe there will be a better result."

"But... I love him! I can't do without him!"

Cheng Hui was silent, he didn't know how to persuade.Perhaps, he is not qualified to persuade at all.A person who dare not come out, a person who dare not get to know his lover, how can he persuade others?

"It's late, I'll take you home!"

Sitting in his BMW, a sense of comfort struck.I was a little sleepy and fell asleep unconsciously.

When I woke up, the car had already parked at the entrance of the community, and it was already four o'clock in the morning.I couldn't help being shocked: "Why didn't you wake me up? If I get out of the car, you should go back early so that your wife and children won't worry!"

"Hurry up and go home!" He gracefully sent me off the car, and left leisurely after I entered the community.

When I got home, the hall was brightly lit.Dad and Li Xiangyu were sitting quietly.Li Xiangyu was reading a book, while his father was smoking a cigarette carelessly.There were more than a dozen cigarette butts in the ashtray at this time.

Li Xiangyu closed the book, went back to the bedroom, and then turned off the lights.

"Why is it so late, don't you know that your family will be worried?" My father slammed out the cigarette butt and asked me.

"Go Gay!"

"You..." Dad raised his hand, but the slap didn't come down.

"Do you think you can trap me by trapping Li Xiangyu? If you really want to trap, trap my heart first!" I don't know where the courage came from, but I actually entered Li Xiangyu's bedroom in front of my father.

At this moment, Li Xiangyu was lying quietly in bed with his eyes closed.

I squeezed into the bed and hugged him gently: "I'm going to be gay today!"

"Well, if you want to sleep here, take off your clothes first!"

I took off my clothes and lay down against his back: "Don't ask me, what did I do?"

He suddenly turned sideways and hugged me: "Don't ask! Let's talk when you want to talk. Go to sleep, you have to go to school tomorrow, and you have to work part-time in the afternoon!"

Lying in Li Xiangyu's arms, I feel so warm!

After turning off the lights, it was pitch black again, just like the future of me and Li Xiangyu.

God, tomorrow will be bright, will Li Xiangyu and I usher in light in the future?