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Chapter 168 What I Can't Get, I Still Want
"It's not...it's not like this..."
Wu Ya kept shaking her head, tears kept dripping down her cheeks.
How much she wanted to tell Jin Queli that those words were not the truest meaning in her heart.But she just said it, and she did it wrong...
Looking at the back of the other party who turned and left decisively.
She stretched out her hand, but in the end it still stopped in the air, and then slowly put it down.
……
Jin Queli lowered his eyes, but his expression did not change at all.But he left here at a much faster speed than when he came, as if escaping!
But Bai Su, who was guarding the door in a daze, suddenly saw a figure passing by him quickly, and couldn't help being slightly stunned.
Why... did you finish talking so quickly?
It is impossible to think.
"Hey!"
She quickly lifted the hem of her skirt and quickly followed her.
"Jin Queli!"
After finally catching up with him, she gasped for breath and said speechlessly, "It's late at night, why are you running so fast?"
"I don't know, I thought it was a thief!"
Jin Queli stayed where he was for a while, and said bitterly in his heart: Isn't he just a thief?But now, it can be regarded as 'return to the original owner'.
He took a deep breath and tried to calm down: "I've already finished talking to her. If there's nothing else, don't follow me anymore."
After speaking, he wanted to move forward again.
But Bai Su pulled him up and grabbed him firmly!
He asked him with calm and bright eyes: "Your life, but so little time has passed. Are you sure... are you really 'finished' like this?"
Jin Queli smiled lightly and asked her back, "What else? Should there be something else?"
"Jin Queli..."
Bai Su looked at him quietly, and slowly said: "To a certain extent, we are all the same. I also understand how you feel..."
When the mother was forced to leave southern Xinjiang, she was just a newborn child.
When she was young, she didn't know who her mother was, and she didn't know why she didn't have a mother.But she didn't dare to ask.
Because every time I asked this question, my father would hug her and say 'I'm sorry' over and over again...
As time passed, she didn't dare to ask any more.
But not asking doesn't mean she won't think about it.Every time she sees other children in other people's homes, other children will be pulled and held by their mothers, teaching them to play the piano and embroider, and she will still be jealous.
Clenching his hand tightly, Bai Su persisted and said softly: "If you can't get it, you will still want it. It doesn't matter if it's ten years or twenty years."
"Of course you can pretend it doesn't matter."
"But the memory... it just stays there forever, it can't move."
Jin Queli stood silently on the spot, letting the other party hold her, and did not struggle anymore.
She was right, he still wanted what he couldn't get.And he really just pretended to be indifferent, after all, he never got rid of those memories.
But Bai Su made a mistake...
He is totally different from her.
For her, everything now is safe and sound, lost and recovered.
But what about him?Not only has he never received half a favor, but he has been pierced with invisible and inextricable thorns all over his body.
Some people can be healed by the most innocent memories of their childhood throughout their lives.But some people have to spend nearly a lifetime to bury that memory.
Even if you are lucky enough to be able to make up for it, so what?
It's already different...
"Okay, let go."
With a light movement of his arm, he shook off the hand that had been holding him tightly.
Jin Queli didn't look back, but left alone, silently and resolutely.He suddenly wanted to see the prime minister right now, and wanted to just hug him quietly until dawn.
But when he walked to the door and saw that there was only a weak candle in the room, he hesitated again.
The prime minister...he should have fallen asleep, right?
That's it.
Shaking his head lightly, Jin Queli finally let go of the hand that was about to push the door open.Turning around, I planned to go to the side room alone to be quiet.
In the room, Qin Suxi, who had been lying on the table waiting for him for a long time without giving up, was so angry that his eyes were red.
Now, seeing the person I had waited so hard to come, he didn't even dare to look at him, so he just wanted to just leave? !
"stop!"
Without even thinking about it, Qin Suxi opened the door, startling the person who just turned around!
Then, he grabbed Jin Queli by the collar, and the two of them pulled into the room, pressed against the door and asked, "Tell me, where have you been?"
Jin Queli was a little confused by his appearance as if he had cried.
He smiled and hugged the person tightly and coaxed: "What's the matter? But who made the prime minister unhappy?"
Qin Suxi: ()
Don't you know who made Lao Tzu unhappy?
Seeing that the other party didn't answer his question and changed the subject, Qin Suxi became more and more angry!He even felt that this guy had done something shameful behind his back, so he didn't dare to answer his question!
Thinking of this made his heart ache.
I promised myself that before, if Jin Queli dared to let him down, then he would have left at the worst, and would have been thrown out of the blue by Qin Suxi long ago!
All he knows now is that if this guy really did something to be sorry for himself.
Then even if he went to jump off a building, a cliff, or a river... then he would absolutely drag Jin Queli, this shameless person, to die with him!
Thinking of this, Qin Suxi couldn't help gritting his teeth, and questioned Jin Queli again: "I asked where you went, don't change the subject!"
However, even though his attitude was a bit too obscene, the other party had a good temper and did not get angry with him.
Instead, she began to answer his questions obediently, "I just went to the imperial garden and met someone."
Met someone... that's all? !
Someone who was in an extraordinary mood did not calm down, but even exploded even more, so angry that his eyes were about to pop out!
OK……
He actually dared to go to the Imperial Garden to meet that Bai Su in the middle of the night alone!
Qin Suxi laughed back angrily, "It's been more than an hour since the banquet ended, right?"
"What are you talking about? Do you have to chat with someone for so long at a time like this? Huh?"
Jin Queli thought for a moment in silence, and said one thing: "There is indeed nothing to talk about."
Qin Suxi: ()
Nothing to talk about?
There's nothing to talk about, why are you chatting for so long!
I see that you are having a great time chatting, and I can't think of leaving anymore!
Thinking that anything could happen in this hour or so, Qin Suxi was so wronged that he wanted to cry!
And people are always prone to impulse.Do a lot of things that you can't help but want to strangle yourself when you think about it in the future...
I saw a certain person who had been frustrated for a whole day slammed the door hard and closed it!
He tugged on Jin Queli's collar, and then pushed him down on the bed with a look of bewilderment!
Then, holding back tears, Qin Suxi began to remove the clothes of the person on the bed.Until he saw the other party's belt, it was still the same knot that he helped him tie in the morning.
Qin Suxi's complexion improved a little.
But even if the worst possibility didn't happen, he still had to give this dog a good warning today.Let him know what will happen if he offends himself!
A handful of generals were about to be stripped off, and Jin Queli, a dumb goose who hadn't even realized what was going on, was pinned down on the bed!
Qin Suxi aimed at his lips, and took a deep mouthful!
He kisses and bites at the same time.Even if the smell of blood spread from the two people's mouths, they didn't intend to let go!
He didn't stop that bloody kiss until he was almost out of breath.She raised her head slightly, and sat on Jin Queli's body and looked at him.
He gritted his teeth and warned: "Jin Queli, I'll tell you!"
"I gave you so many opportunities to go back on your word before. It was you who insisted on saying that you liked me, but I didn't force you!"
"Now that I've fallen in love with you, don't even think about having any chance to go back on your word!"
And for no reason, Jin Queli, who was pinned down on the bed innocently, was slightly taken aback.
The prime minister...
Did you just say you like yourself?
Noticing the blankness of the people below him, Qin Suxi was even annoyed!Now that I am talking to him so seriously, how dare he be distracted? !
His eyes, which had already cried once, were even redder now.
Qin Suxi couldn't help but speak indiscriminately, and threatened: "You, if you really dare to do something wrong to me in the future, believe it or not..."
"Believe it or not, I'm going to eunuch you immediately with a knife in my hand!"
Before he could finish his sentence, he felt himself unsteady.
After a whirlwind, Qin Suxi hadn't had time to exclaim.Then he realized that Jin Queli, who had been obediently under him just now, turned over and pushed him down!
And in the eyes of the other party, not only did he not have any trace of fear because of his threat just now.
On the contrary, it also reveals a kind of... It can be said to be a light of excitement?
He might be eunuched and still laugh so happily, don't be a pervert!
In fact, Jin Queli automatically ignored what the prime minister said later because it was impossible to happen.
Now his mind is full of the sentence that the prime minister put in to confess himself.
Although it was a good sentence full of admiration, the other party said it as if he wanted to tear up his ticket.But this didn't stop him from blushing because of that sentence.
Jin Queli couldn't help but widen his eyes, looked at his prime minister eagerly and begged, "Say it again?"
"Say it again, okay?"
Qin Suxi:? ? ?
"Say what again?"
what's the situation?Could it be that his threat just now was too soft for this idiot to hear clearly? !
Wu Ya kept shaking her head, tears kept dripping down her cheeks.
How much she wanted to tell Jin Queli that those words were not the truest meaning in her heart.But she just said it, and she did it wrong...
Looking at the back of the other party who turned and left decisively.
She stretched out her hand, but in the end it still stopped in the air, and then slowly put it down.
……
Jin Queli lowered his eyes, but his expression did not change at all.But he left here at a much faster speed than when he came, as if escaping!
But Bai Su, who was guarding the door in a daze, suddenly saw a figure passing by him quickly, and couldn't help being slightly stunned.
Why... did you finish talking so quickly?
It is impossible to think.
"Hey!"
She quickly lifted the hem of her skirt and quickly followed her.
"Jin Queli!"
After finally catching up with him, she gasped for breath and said speechlessly, "It's late at night, why are you running so fast?"
"I don't know, I thought it was a thief!"
Jin Queli stayed where he was for a while, and said bitterly in his heart: Isn't he just a thief?But now, it can be regarded as 'return to the original owner'.
He took a deep breath and tried to calm down: "I've already finished talking to her. If there's nothing else, don't follow me anymore."
After speaking, he wanted to move forward again.
But Bai Su pulled him up and grabbed him firmly!
He asked him with calm and bright eyes: "Your life, but so little time has passed. Are you sure... are you really 'finished' like this?"
Jin Queli smiled lightly and asked her back, "What else? Should there be something else?"
"Jin Queli..."
Bai Su looked at him quietly, and slowly said: "To a certain extent, we are all the same. I also understand how you feel..."
When the mother was forced to leave southern Xinjiang, she was just a newborn child.
When she was young, she didn't know who her mother was, and she didn't know why she didn't have a mother.But she didn't dare to ask.
Because every time I asked this question, my father would hug her and say 'I'm sorry' over and over again...
As time passed, she didn't dare to ask any more.
But not asking doesn't mean she won't think about it.Every time she sees other children in other people's homes, other children will be pulled and held by their mothers, teaching them to play the piano and embroider, and she will still be jealous.
Clenching his hand tightly, Bai Su persisted and said softly: "If you can't get it, you will still want it. It doesn't matter if it's ten years or twenty years."
"Of course you can pretend it doesn't matter."
"But the memory... it just stays there forever, it can't move."
Jin Queli stood silently on the spot, letting the other party hold her, and did not struggle anymore.
She was right, he still wanted what he couldn't get.And he really just pretended to be indifferent, after all, he never got rid of those memories.
But Bai Su made a mistake...
He is totally different from her.
For her, everything now is safe and sound, lost and recovered.
But what about him?Not only has he never received half a favor, but he has been pierced with invisible and inextricable thorns all over his body.
Some people can be healed by the most innocent memories of their childhood throughout their lives.But some people have to spend nearly a lifetime to bury that memory.
Even if you are lucky enough to be able to make up for it, so what?
It's already different...
"Okay, let go."
With a light movement of his arm, he shook off the hand that had been holding him tightly.
Jin Queli didn't look back, but left alone, silently and resolutely.He suddenly wanted to see the prime minister right now, and wanted to just hug him quietly until dawn.
But when he walked to the door and saw that there was only a weak candle in the room, he hesitated again.
The prime minister...he should have fallen asleep, right?
That's it.
Shaking his head lightly, Jin Queli finally let go of the hand that was about to push the door open.Turning around, I planned to go to the side room alone to be quiet.
In the room, Qin Suxi, who had been lying on the table waiting for him for a long time without giving up, was so angry that his eyes were red.
Now, seeing the person I had waited so hard to come, he didn't even dare to look at him, so he just wanted to just leave? !
"stop!"
Without even thinking about it, Qin Suxi opened the door, startling the person who just turned around!
Then, he grabbed Jin Queli by the collar, and the two of them pulled into the room, pressed against the door and asked, "Tell me, where have you been?"
Jin Queli was a little confused by his appearance as if he had cried.
He smiled and hugged the person tightly and coaxed: "What's the matter? But who made the prime minister unhappy?"
Qin Suxi: ()
Don't you know who made Lao Tzu unhappy?
Seeing that the other party didn't answer his question and changed the subject, Qin Suxi became more and more angry!He even felt that this guy had done something shameful behind his back, so he didn't dare to answer his question!
Thinking of this made his heart ache.
I promised myself that before, if Jin Queli dared to let him down, then he would have left at the worst, and would have been thrown out of the blue by Qin Suxi long ago!
All he knows now is that if this guy really did something to be sorry for himself.
Then even if he went to jump off a building, a cliff, or a river... then he would absolutely drag Jin Queli, this shameless person, to die with him!
Thinking of this, Qin Suxi couldn't help gritting his teeth, and questioned Jin Queli again: "I asked where you went, don't change the subject!"
However, even though his attitude was a bit too obscene, the other party had a good temper and did not get angry with him.
Instead, she began to answer his questions obediently, "I just went to the imperial garden and met someone."
Met someone... that's all? !
Someone who was in an extraordinary mood did not calm down, but even exploded even more, so angry that his eyes were about to pop out!
OK……
He actually dared to go to the Imperial Garden to meet that Bai Su in the middle of the night alone!
Qin Suxi laughed back angrily, "It's been more than an hour since the banquet ended, right?"
"What are you talking about? Do you have to chat with someone for so long at a time like this? Huh?"
Jin Queli thought for a moment in silence, and said one thing: "There is indeed nothing to talk about."
Qin Suxi: ()
Nothing to talk about?
There's nothing to talk about, why are you chatting for so long!
I see that you are having a great time chatting, and I can't think of leaving anymore!
Thinking that anything could happen in this hour or so, Qin Suxi was so wronged that he wanted to cry!
And people are always prone to impulse.Do a lot of things that you can't help but want to strangle yourself when you think about it in the future...
I saw a certain person who had been frustrated for a whole day slammed the door hard and closed it!
He tugged on Jin Queli's collar, and then pushed him down on the bed with a look of bewilderment!
Then, holding back tears, Qin Suxi began to remove the clothes of the person on the bed.Until he saw the other party's belt, it was still the same knot that he helped him tie in the morning.
Qin Suxi's complexion improved a little.
But even if the worst possibility didn't happen, he still had to give this dog a good warning today.Let him know what will happen if he offends himself!
A handful of generals were about to be stripped off, and Jin Queli, a dumb goose who hadn't even realized what was going on, was pinned down on the bed!
Qin Suxi aimed at his lips, and took a deep mouthful!
He kisses and bites at the same time.Even if the smell of blood spread from the two people's mouths, they didn't intend to let go!
He didn't stop that bloody kiss until he was almost out of breath.She raised her head slightly, and sat on Jin Queli's body and looked at him.
He gritted his teeth and warned: "Jin Queli, I'll tell you!"
"I gave you so many opportunities to go back on your word before. It was you who insisted on saying that you liked me, but I didn't force you!"
"Now that I've fallen in love with you, don't even think about having any chance to go back on your word!"
And for no reason, Jin Queli, who was pinned down on the bed innocently, was slightly taken aback.
The prime minister...
Did you just say you like yourself?
Noticing the blankness of the people below him, Qin Suxi was even annoyed!Now that I am talking to him so seriously, how dare he be distracted? !
His eyes, which had already cried once, were even redder now.
Qin Suxi couldn't help but speak indiscriminately, and threatened: "You, if you really dare to do something wrong to me in the future, believe it or not..."
"Believe it or not, I'm going to eunuch you immediately with a knife in my hand!"
Before he could finish his sentence, he felt himself unsteady.
After a whirlwind, Qin Suxi hadn't had time to exclaim.Then he realized that Jin Queli, who had been obediently under him just now, turned over and pushed him down!
And in the eyes of the other party, not only did he not have any trace of fear because of his threat just now.
On the contrary, it also reveals a kind of... It can be said to be a light of excitement?
He might be eunuched and still laugh so happily, don't be a pervert!
In fact, Jin Queli automatically ignored what the prime minister said later because it was impossible to happen.
Now his mind is full of the sentence that the prime minister put in to confess himself.
Although it was a good sentence full of admiration, the other party said it as if he wanted to tear up his ticket.But this didn't stop him from blushing because of that sentence.
Jin Queli couldn't help but widen his eyes, looked at his prime minister eagerly and begged, "Say it again?"
"Say it again, okay?"
Qin Suxi:? ? ?
"Say what again?"
what's the situation?Could it be that his threat just now was too soft for this idiot to hear clearly? !
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