Cannon Fodder Slap Guide [Quick Transmigration]

"Dear Major, I'm so happy to receive your reply! Although judging from the elegant and polite words and sentences, there is a 100% possibility that Li Li wrote it, but I know you must be lying on the side lazily dictating, He's just translating your never-so-good-sounding words into better words."

"Knowing that you and Mo Li have had a good time, and that Mo Yao has been taken care of properly, I am relieved. Hey, life without me must be boring. In fact, I miss you very much, but when I think of you being with Mo Li There must be all kinds of shamelessness and integrity, and I am very glad that I don't have to go to the dirty scene. Hehehe~"

"The King of War surprises you, doesn't it? Chu Qiao is really a very smart person, and he may be on par with Mo Yao. After changing his identity, he no longer studies war robots. Now he is a professor at my school, teaching Artificial intelligence programming courses, I feel that I am much more mature than before. However, the youthfulness at that time may be pretending, after all, he is a very cunning king of war."

"Although I know him, he doesn't know me. Except that I took his class, we have no intersection. What I want to say is that I seem to like someone."

"I am quite popular in school. Several girls have confessed to me. I believe there are many crushes that I dare not say directly. Hehehe. But I fell in love with a boy, it must be your gay attribute Infected me, you have to bear the blame!"

"This boy is tall, thin, handsome, sunny and handsome. When he smiles, he shows two small canine teeth. He is really cute and handsome. Every time he plays basketball, I will go to see him and cheer for him with other people. scream."

"Lately I think he noticed me too, I must be so cute hehehe. It's a beautiful thing to have feelings, I'm going to enjoy life. Tonight is Halloween, we are all going to the school party, I I'm ready to confess my love to him, wish me luck! Mmm~"

Xitong clicked the send button to confirm that the email had been sent, then closed the notebook and jumped off the bed, picked up the clothes that were put aside and compared them to him.

The young man in the mirror was thin and tall, with soft hair. Although his facial features were not very outstanding, the combination gave a very comfortable and pleasing feeling, especially the bright smile.

The one he wants to cosplay tonight is a vampire, because that boy cosplays a werewolf.Official match CP, love and kill each other, basic love for hundreds of years, just thinking about it makes Xi Tong laugh.

"How should I speak?" Xi Tong held his cheeks and fell into deep thought. He had never done this kind of confession. Although he could search a lot from the Internet, he was afraid when he saw the negative teaching materials of failure. I will not do well.

He stood in front of the mirror and practiced repeatedly, trying to adjust the expression and the curvature of the corners of his mouth when he smiled, striving for perfection. Every time he said the words "I like you", he couldn't help covering his face and laughing.

Even if you are so embarrassed to face yourself, wouldn't you be ashamed to death when you face that boy?

"You're fine," Xitong said to himself in the mirror, "The major's thick skin gives you strength!"

After mustering up his courage, Xitong changed his clothes and was about to put on vampire makeup when the phone rang.

"Hello?" Xitong picked up the phone without even looking at it. The caller at this time is probably a friend who invited him to a party.

"Xitong?" A gentle and low voice came from the phone, "I'm Chu Qiao, are you free now?"

"Professor Chu?" Xi Tong put down the tools in his hand, wondering, "I'm getting ready for Halloween, what's the matter?"

Chu Qiao said: "Take up some of your time to help me deal with the AI ​​from the last experiment."

Although Chu Qiao's voice was very gentle, it was not in a tone of discussion.Xi Tong frowned, feeling very embarrassed, he hesitated and looked at his watch, there was still half an hour before the party officially started.When it comes to parties, no one gets there on time, so he still has a lot of time.It's just that he hasn't made up yet...

While Xitong was hesitating, Chu Qiao added, "I'll add credits to you."

Adding credits is a good thing, especially for people like Xitong who regard earning credits as a new hobby of collecting. He thought for a while and said, "Okay, I'll go there now."

"Don't worry, I'll wait for you."

After hanging up the phone, Xitong packed all the tools needed for makeup in his bag, hurried to the virtual interaction laboratory, knocked on the door, and joked with a festive atmosphere: "trickortreat!"

The young professor was sitting among a bunch of experimental robots playing with his mobile phone. Hearing this, he smiled slyly: "I only have deoxyribose, do you want it?"

Xitong was taken aback for a moment, and his face turned red, why didn't he know this professor was so dishonest before.

Seeing that Xitong was sweating from running, Chu Qiao took out a tissue from her pocket and handed it over: "Didn't you just say don't worry?"

Xitong took the paper towel and wiped his sweat while slandering, who is anxious for you? Isn't he in a hurry to finish work and go to the party to confess his love to his beloved "werewolf".

He looked around at the more than 30 robots they used in class to test mathematical logic and simulated thinking.This course is not too easy for a super intelligent brain like him, and he gets full marks in every exam.

Xitong felt that as a top student, he must have left a deep impression on the professor, and it must be because of this that Chu Qiao called him.

Sure enough, Chu Qiao said: "These robots will be put on the party tonight, please help me input program instructions for them." After speaking, he turned his head to the side and stopped looking at Xitong.

But Xitong still saw a flash of embarrassment on Chu Qiao's face.

What was the professor snickering about, Xitong didn't think about it.Time was running out, he put down his backpack without saying a word, and said, "Okay, let's get started."

The two people with super high IQs cooperated very well, and they also had a common language about artificial intelligence, but they had some disagreements when they talked about simulating emotions.

Chu Qiao believes that it is very difficult to achieve an artificial intelligence that can fully understand and generate human emotions, especially the complex human emotion of love, let alone artificial intelligence, even humans themselves cannot fully explain it.

Xitong refuses to accept, he is an advanced artificial intelligence, can fully understand what love is, and he will fall in love with another person, which is a good proof.

It's just that I can't say this to Chu Qiao, so he had no choice but to say euphemistically: "This kind of technology will definitely be realized, just like Pinocchio, although it was just a puppet that could talk and walk at the beginning, but after going through various encounters , finally turned into a real boy."

"Then what do you think?" Chu Qiao glanced at him, "what kind of things do artificial intelligence go through before it becomes a real human being?"

Xi Tong pouted, for him, tonight's confession was an excellent opportunity.

After finally setting up all the robot programs, more than half an hour has passed since the party started, so it is just right to go at this time.

Xitong was about to pack up and leave, but Chu Qiao said, "Are you going to a party? Just move all the robots there."

Xi Tong: "..."

Chu Qiao added another knife: "I won't be with you anymore, I have to go back and change clothes."

Xi Tong: "..."

What a shit professor, I really want to kick him.Xi Tong gestured to Chu Qiao's back, and couldn't help asking: "Professor, are you going too? What role do you want to cosplay?"

Chu Qiao turned her head and smiled at him: "I originally wanted to cosplay the King of War, but now I have changed my mind."

puff.Xi Tong snickered, this man is really narcissistic to the extreme, he even wants to cosplay himself, compared with him, our major is thin-skinned.

After laughing, Xitong's face collapsed again, facing more than 30 robots, he really wanted to cry without tears.He made several calls for help, but no one came to help, so he had to move the robots outside one by one by himself.

After moving a dozen or so, someone stopped him suddenly.

Xitong looked back, his heart beat a few beats faster, and the person in front of him was the handsome werewolf.

"What are you doing, the party has already started." The werewolf held two barrels of beer, looked at Xi Tong in surprise, and then laughed out loud.

Xitong wiped off his sweat in embarrassment, and explained what he was doing.

The werewolf pointed at Xitong's face: "Who are you cosplaying, his face is all white."

Xitong was startled, and looked in the mirror that he was going to use for makeup. His face was covered with scraps of paper towels. Thinking of Chu Qiao's malicious smile before, it was obvious that he was making fun of his embarrassment.

How can it be repaired!Xitong gritted his teeth in his heart, he went to help with good intentions, but Chu Qiao didn't even remind him, making him look ugly in front of his sweetheart, how could there be such a vicious person!

"Hurry up, don't mess with these things," the werewolf said while trotting away, "remember to find me later, I have something to tell you."

As he spoke, he raised his eyebrows at Xitong.

God!Xitong clutched his chest, almost flying, could it be that his sweetheart has also been in love with him for a long time, and wants to confess his love to him on Halloween night!

Have they been secretly in love with each other for so long! ! !

Aha, ahahahaha... Xitong stood in front of a ghost model and let out a series of smirks, unable to believe that his sweet and beautiful love was about to begin.

To his Chu Qiao, to his credits.Xitong was so excited that he left the robot alone, put on makeup hastily and rushed to the party.

All the street lights on the campus were extinguished, and all the light came from jack-o-lanterns with evil expressions. There were ghosts floating in the air, Frankenstein with a hideous face, a witch on a broom, and black hair and golden eyes. Sparkle cat.

There was a lot of noise in the student dormitory where the party was being held, and the noise could be heard on the sidewalks lined with candy bars.Xitong pushed aside the cobweb-like curtain and walked in. The air was filled with the smell of white sage incense and hormones mixed together.

A nurse covered in blood, a tall werewolf, a zombie bride, and some anime characters that have nothing to do with Halloween shuttled back and forth before his eyes, all holding alcohol disguised as drinks in their hands.

"Xitong, you are finally here!" A girl dressed as Medusa came over and handed him a glass of wine.

This girl has always had a good impression of Xitong, and she has expressed it both openly and secretly. Of course, Xitong refused, because he only likes that werewolf boy.

He was absent-minded about the girl's greetings, his eyes wandered around looking for the figure of the werewolf that belonged to him, and the straight paper cup in his hand had been deformed by him.

After a while, the target finally appeared, and Xitong's heartbeat was pounding in his chest in line with the intense music rhythm.

Holding a model of a diamond ring the size of a football in his hand, the werewolf walked up to Xitong with a smile and said, "You're finally here, I've been waiting for you."

Xitong stared at the diamond ring, his facial muscles twitched uncontrollably, and said incoherently: "Me too."

"I have a question for you," the werewolf glanced at the girl standing next to Xitong, and whispered in his ear, "Are you gay?"

Gay, but gay!Xitong felt that the werewolf was more thoughtful than he thought, and he still remembered to confirm the attributes before confessing his love.He blushed and nodded fiercely. If it wasn't for the vampire makeup, the color on his face would probably be brighter than plasma at this moment.

The werewolf smiled in satisfaction, and just as Xitong was about to reach out to take the big diamond ring, he suddenly turned to the Medusa girl beside him, held up the diamond ring and handed it over: "I have liked you for a long time, don't have a crush on this gay guy, follow me."

Xi Tong subconsciously pressed his chest: "..."

In order to make the dressing effect more realistic, he also drew a line of blood at the corner of his mouth, and now it really looks like he is holding his heart and vomiting blood.

No more——Xi Tong staggered, feeling like he was struck by lightning, and suffered 100 million tons of damage, as if all the veins and veins in his body were broken, and his bones were also broken. He had to find a door frame to support him, but he still wanted to die .

Excited screams came from the side, but he didn't want to know how the girl answered. After drinking a full glass of wine in his hand, he leaned against the wall and hid silently in the toilet.

Why did that person hurt him so much?It's so hard to be a human being, and it's so hard to be in love. His first love hadn't even started yet, so it ended in heartbreak.Chu Qiao is right, he may not be able to understand such a complicated thing as love.

Lanshou, shiitake mushrooms.Xi Tong sat on the toilet, buried his face in his hands, tears couldn't stop overflowing, at first he just sobbed softly, but when he was drunk with alcohol, he cried out regardless.

During the period, several people knocked on the door, but Xi Tong didn't answer, anyway, his crying was enough to drive everyone away.

After finally being quiet for a while, there was another knock on the door: "trick or treat!"

Xitong covered his face and said in a muffled voice, "Go away, I want to be quiet!"

The person outside the door said: "I am what you want, Jingjing, open the door."

Xi Tong: "..." He decided not to speak out, anyway, the people outside the door will leave after a while.

Sure enough, the door was quiet.Xi Tong stood up in a daze, sniffed, opened his trousers and put some water, shook the bird, and wiped it with paper habitually, when the toilet door suddenly opened.

Xitong was startled, before he put on his underwear, he frantically pulled up his pants and zipped them up. Suddenly, he let out a scream, and bent down covering his underwear.

The person outside the door came in and closed and locked the toilet door, pressed Xitong on the door panel, put down the toilet lid and sat on it, and said to his trembling little bird: "Take your hands away, I see look."

Xitong: "qaq" got caught in the hair, the zipper was going up or down, it hurt like hell.

The man patted his hand that was blocking the bird away, handled his pinched hair gently and carefully, and then flicked on his crumpled thing mischievously: "Okay."

Xi Tong's body shrank from being hit, quickly put on his pants, wiped away the tears all over his face, and only then could he see the man's face clearly.

Xi Tong: "...how is it you!"

The man laughed and said, "Why can't it be me?"

Xitong looked at this man who wanted to dress up as the king of war, but now he cosplays with Fan Helsing, and he was very angry.He made a fool of himself in front of Chu Qiao again and again, and now he didn't want to see him at all.

Xi Tong breathed out his alcohol and said, "What are you doing here? Do you want to make fun of me?"

Chu Qiao replied with a smile: "I am Fan Haixin, here to catch vampires."

Xi Tong: "You go!"

Chu Qiao: "I don't."

Xi Tong turned to open the door: "Then I'll go." He twisted the handle for a long time, and tugged the lock for a long time, but the door didn't move at all.

He wobbled and took a step back, almost sitting on Chu Qiao's lap, pointed at the door lock with straight eyebrows, and suddenly said: "Open Sesame!"

Chu Qiao couldn't help laughing out loud.Xitong looked back at him and said, "Did you do something wrong?"

Chu Qiao shook the key in her hand, and admitted very generously: "Yes."

"Bring it!" Xitong reached out to grab it bluntly, and staggered on Chu Qiao.

Chu Qiao put her arms around his waist and supported him, "How much did you drink?"

Xi Tong's current posture is just sitting on Chu Qiao's lap. If he is conscious, he will definitely jump up in embarrassment, but now he is very dizzy and feels very comfortable sitting like this, so he simply rests his chin on Chu Qiao. On the shoulder, said slowly: "A big cup."

"You pour it in a glass." Chu Qiao couldn't help but cry.

Xi Tong didn't say a word, Chu Qiao's embrace was very warm, which made him feel a sense of grievance suddenly, no matter who the person in front of him was, he wrapped his arms around Chu Qiao's neck and began to cry, "I'm broken in love!"

Chu Qiao patted him on the back: "Have you ever been in love?"

Xi Tong: "Oh, no."

Chu Qiao suppressed a smile: "Before falling in love, have you broken up first?"

Xitong buried his wet face on Chu Qiao's shoulder, and recounted what happened that night in a mess, and finally said: "You are right, I don't understand, I don't understand anything. I can't become a real person... ..."

Hearing Xitong's nonsense, Chu Qiao smiled lightly, not feeling the slightest surprise or surprise.

He has known for a long time that there is a very special soul in this lovely shell. When he thinks that Xitong is an advanced intellectual brain with a higher level of technology, his heart beats wildly with excitement, and he is deeply infatuated with it.

How could others know the specialness of Xitong like him and regard it as a treasure.

He rubbed Xitong's hair, and whispered in his ear: "Pinocchio has gone through a lot of tests to become a real boy. If you want to become a real person and get love, you have to go through some tests."

Xitong murmured sadly, "What should I do?"

"Don't worry, I will teach you."

Chu Qiao's voice was full of coaxing, Xitong unconsciously hugged him: "Teach me what?"

"First," Chu Qiao helped him sit up straight, staring at his soft lips and said, "Start with kissing."

The moment Chu Qiao's lips touched, Xitong's eyes met together, and then he slipped his flexible and slippery tongue into his mouth, licking and sucking, which made him feel throbbing, dizzy in his head, and in the cloud foggy.

Chu Qiao's kiss was very gentle and skillful. For Xi Tong, a theorist who had only seen the major's wolf kiss, this extremely novel experience made him very excited. Coupled with Chu Qiao's touch, his body became tense after a while. Soft.

"Do you like this?" Chu Qiao asked in a low voice.

"Hmm..." Xi Tong handed over his first kiss, and after a long time of lingering lips and tongue, he nodded in confusion, "What else?"

Chu Qiao let out a light laugh, slipped her hand to Xitong's buttocks and squeezed: "Don't worry, let's take it step by step..."

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Email from [-] months ago:

"Dear Major, in order to learn more about how to become a real human being, I moved to Chu Qiao's house, and every day he would kiss me and cook me all kinds of delicious food. I also want to learn, but he said I just need to be responsible for eating."

Reply: He wants to fatten up before eating.

Email from three months ago:

"Today, Chu Qiao said that she wanted to teach me something new. This time, there are teaching aids. It's a pink stick. When the switch is turned on, it will vibrate non-stop. I don't know what it is for. I will learn it later. Tell you."

Reply: Teacher Chu's teaching methods are very diverse, but I don't think you will tell me.

Email from three months ago:

"Major, my butt hurts so much, why do you seem to feel comfortable doing that kind of thing with Mo Li? qaq I had a big fight with Chu Qiao, and I never want to do such a shameful and painful thing again! I to move out."

Reply: That's right, don't meet him again, his skills are too poor, and he probably doesn't have much teaching experience.

Email from two months ago:

"It's really subtle to say, that... that's the one, just like what Chu Qiao said, after getting used to it... Hehehe, anyway, I seem to understand something. I moved back to Chuqiao's house again, because of the part of leaving him Time, I think about him every day... the delicious food."

Reply: You are done.

Email from a month ago:

"Chu Qiao bought me a Corgi, the picture below is cute, isn't it? He said we are a family of three, 233"

Reply: I think it is a family of three dogs.

Today's mail:

"I didn't write a letter last month because Chu Qiao took me on a trip. I thought a lot during this trip, and I feel that I am already a real person, a very happy person."

After Mo Li finished reading the email, he said to Tong Lin, "Why do I feel that Xi Tong was eaten to death by Chu Qiao?"

"Human feelings are too complicated." Tong Lin lay on the sunny beach, touched a shell and put it in front of his eyes, "No matter how advanced his intelligence is, he can't use formulas to calculate love, let alone Chu Qiao is a An old fox with a tender face and a black belly. But since he can feel happy, that's enough."

Mo Li lowered his head and kissed Tong Lin's lips, and said with a smile, "What about you?"

Tong Lin: "What am I?"

Mo Li: "Are you happy?"

Tong Lin narrowed his eyes: "Can you cook delicious food?"

Mo Li: "No."

Tong Lin patted his belly: "Not happy, not happy."

Li Li grabbed a handful of sand and threw it over, pointed at the computer and said, "How do I reply?"

Tong Lin thought for a while, then said with a smirk, "Let's write it like this."

"Dear Xitong, congratulations, it seems that the series of courses of 'Professor Chu teaches you to be a man' has come to an end. There are still many valuable courses to learn in the world. Have you ever thought about changing teachers? Maybe you will gain something More……"

Chu Qiao, who was far away in another dimension, slowly raised the corners of her mouth after reading the latest email she received.

"Any new emails?" Xi Tong ran over holding Corgi.

Chu Qiao clicked to confirm the deletion, raised her head and said: "No, they may be busy traveling on different planets."

Xi Tong nodded: "What's for dinner tonight, I want sashimi, how about you?"

"I want to eat," Chu Qiao hugged Xi Tong and kissed him on the forehead, "You."

This dish is not enough for a lifetime.