The Light of the Dogs

This time it was Jinjiu Ten's turn to be shocked, but Brother Xiaojin has a function, no matter how turbulent his heart is, he can always maintain his manly, stinky and hard expression on his appearance.

He responded indifferently: "Oh."

Then he walked away without looking back. Although he tripped over the threshold when he reached the door and staggered, which seemed a bit like running away, his back was as firm as ever, and of course you can understand it as stiff.

He reads... He has never read a book, so even if he forced himself to turn and turn what Yu Xunxun said desperately in his mind, he couldn't write down a sentence in the end.

After thinking for a long time, he made a simple and rough summary of this colorful confession: You are very good, I admire you, you are handsome, so handsome, so I only want to have sex with you.

What gave Xiao Zai'er such an outrageous illusion?Gin Ten is puzzling, I am handsome, yes, I am taller and more handsome than others, but which eye of yours can see that I am chic and at ease?You still see my soul?I don't even know what my soul looks like!

Illusion, definitely an illusion!The brat's love for him is his illusion, and the confession just now is also an illusion!Nothing happened at all.

He forgot to have sex, and under the call of the female manager, he paid the bill in a daze, left the seven fellow villagers and ran away by himself.

There was a little tail behind him, Jinjiu stood still, turned around and saw the little boy staring at him standing a hundred meters away.

He ignored it, turned his head and continued to walk forward, where he was going was entirely dependent on the free will of his two legs.After walking for a while, Jinjiu Ten stopped and turned his head, Xiao Zai also stopped, still looking at him from that distance.

After Yu Xunchao confessed, he also regretted it. He seemed to have overstepped the bounds in this relationship. He seemed to want too much. It seemed that his reason could not control his heart, which caused irreparable consequences.

But since this confession has been made, it should be responded to.But...he was afraid of the male god brother's response.

The two of them are separated by 100 meters like this, stop and go, passing by the endless stream of cars and people, passing by the quiet trees and shadows, from the long dusk of red gauze to the blue night with bright lights.

Until the place where they met for the first time, Brother Xiao Jin stepped forward to hold up a black umbrella for Yu Xunchao that day. Under the umbrella, the two faces were shrouded in shadows, one could see the chin, and the other only showed the eyes.

Yu Zhaoxun saw that the male god brother stopped and stood under the tree for a long time, but he never looked back, and he didn't dare to go forward.

After Jinjiu Ten came home, Yu Xunxuan waited at the door of his house for a while, thinking it was boring, the male god brother didn't seem to be able to open the door.He also had no choice but to go home silently, staring at the closed window for a long time in the night.

For a long time, his life was full of poems and classics, and he got spiritual comfort from these words.He believes that although there are beauty and ugliness in the appearance of a person, the richness of the heart and the carving of the soul can make up for the lack of life.Although the reality will give him a cruel blow many times, telling him that no matter how pure and beautiful his soul is, without external support, the beauty of the soul will never be seen by others.

It's nothing, those people are not important to him.Until he met Jinjiu Ten, his male god brother.He believed that no one would see how radiant the soul of the male god brother was.Others are hell, and the world is hell.

In this hell, he saw the unyielding soul from the shattered flames, he saw the struggle and cry of that soul, they are the same, the posture of that soul desperately breaking free from the shackles awakened his yearning for freedom Yearning, yearning for pride and confidence, yearning for love.

That soul is attracting him, he can't resist his own worship of him, he can't resist the strong magnetic field, step by step forward, step by step approaching, until they merge into one, he will absorb his strength, will contaminate his courage, Struggling together in hell, trying to fly to heaven.

"I will take you from all the earth, from all the heavens,

For my cradle is a forest, and a forest is a graveyard,

For I stand upon the earth—on one leg,

Because no one can sing about you like I can.

From all ages, from all nights,

Take you back from all golden banners, from all swords,

I'll throw away the keys and drive the dogs off the steps—

For in the night of the earth I am more faithful than a dog.

I'll take you back from all the others - from that woman,

You will be no man's bridegroom, and I will be no man's wife,

From the man who was with Ya everywhere in the night,

I'll fight to take you away—you'll have to hold your breath!

But I haven't folded your hands on my chest--

Ah, what a curse! — you left there alone:

Your two wings are already pointing into space and leaping—

Because your cradle is the world, and the world is also a graveyard! "

Yu Xunchao quietly recited this poem. The words forged his inner strength and gave him infinite courage.

"I want to praise you with all the beautiful words, even if all these beautiful words are less than one ten-thousandth of yours, even if the words are pale and barren, that is all I have. Brother, have you seen it? This soul is asking you Help, I'm not cowardly, I'm more determined than anyone else to get you."

It's a pity that Xiao Jin's life realm has not risen to the level of exploring the soul. He only knows that Xiao Zaier has misunderstood, and he should explain clearly.But Yu Xunxun's confession really moved him. He could understand how hot his heart was, and because it was too hot, he didn't dare to answer it, and he didn't dare to have the slightest ambiguity to tarnish his sincerity.

The two of them didn't sleep all night. After Jinjiu went out on the [-]th day, Yu Xunchao followed him as usual, wherever he went, he was as loyal as a dog, eagerly expecting his master's waving.

Jinjiu Shi went to the noodle shop and ordered a portion of noodles, and Yu Xunzhao also went to the noodle shop to order the same portion of noodles as him.When Ginjiu turned around, he mustered up the courage to show him what he thought was the most beautiful smile.

When paying the bill, he bought the gin ten together with his share. Yu Xunchao regarded this as a step forward, so he was even happier.

Until Jinjiu Ten said to him with a cigarette in his mouth: "Don't follow me, I have something to do, go back first, and talk about it at night."

This was a failed negotiation, and Yu Zhaozhao stubbornly waited for his response, and would not give up if he did not respond.

"Don't follow me, go back!" Jinjiu Ten yelled at him angrily after walking for a while.

Yu Xunchao was not shocked at all, and just smiled at him.

"Damn it!" Ginjiu Ten finally took a taxi, but when he went downstairs to the company, he found that the kid had somehow managed to get rid of him.

He couldn't bear to be harassed, and anger rose on his face, "You don't understand human words, I'll tell you to go back!"

Yu Xunchao made a concession, lowered his head and stared at his toes, neither moving forward nor retreating.

"Are you going back?" Jin Jiu Ten strode towards him, as if he was going to beat someone, Yu Xun Zou ran away immediately, Jin Jiu Ten chased after him, chasing Yu Xun Zou far away.

Guessing that it was almost the same, he turned his head and walked back, but when Yu searched for it, it was not the same, so he followed back in a jolt.

So Jinjiu turned around and chased people away, and Yu Xunchao was chased by his ass again. If Brother Jin could be given a broom, this scene would look more like a distraught parent chasing after a disobedient child Fighting, and later evolved into a fierce human being to frighten the fat little wild dog. As long as he stomps his feet, Yu Chaochao has a conditioned reflex to run away.

It's a pity that people without faith can't support people with faith. Brother Xiaojin gave up. He walked into the company on his own, dealt with the handover of several places, sorted out the accounts, and escaped through the back door.

Yu Xunchang may have installed a "Radar System for Locating the Male God" on his body, and Brother Xiaojin can see him inexplicably wherever he goes this day.

How should I say it?Jinjiu Ten thought about it with a headache, please be more tactful if you don't hurt the little boy, this boy must be pretending to be confused, if I speak too harshly, I will be a little bit reluctant.Besides, what did he mean yesterday?Am I getting it wrong?Does he like me as an object, or does he worship me as an idol?

How about I agree with him?Anyway, he just followed and didn't hold back.But what's the matter?If I really said, 'Okay, then you follow', would this count as lying to a child?After all, he doesn't understand anything.Having already lied to someone's body, but also to lie to his heart, wouldn't he really be a scumbag with no conscience?

His tangled head was about to explode, and when he came out of Fenglin Volcano at night and saw the little boy, he thought to himself, let me play on the spot.

This unscrupulous guy came for the last supper, and took Yu Xunzhao to the restaurant for a meal, talking and laughing, and then the two walked downstairs to the house.

Gin Ten said, "I'll take you home."

Yu Xunzhao nodded shyly.

Going downstairs to the flower bed, Gin Ten sat down and said, "Boy, let me talk to you."

Yu Chaoxun sat beside him and listened carefully to his words.

"I'm not educated. You said a lot yesterday. I still don't understand what you mean. Don't talk, listen to me. I think, maybe you haven't been in contact with people, so you feel that people's performance... and The inner thoughts are the same. Fuck! It's rare for me to say such a philosophical word, um... so you may think too much of me.

I don't know what kind of image I am to you, whether it's an idol or a relationship object, it's not appropriate.

The night you drank too much at my house, I told you that you probably didn't remember, but I knew that you stole my puppy, and I knew that you slapped me that day.Don't worry about how I know, anyway, I was very angry, I really wanted to grab you and beat you up, but after seeing you covered up like that, I thought it would be boring to beat you up, and sending you to the police station would be even more boring.I just think about how to torture you to have fun, and how to play with you so that I can be happy.

That day at the door of Gao Zhuangzhuang’s store, that was the time I gave you oranges, I saw you were like that all summer, so I guessed that you might have something wrong with your looks, so I praised you for having beautiful eyes, and your reaction really confirmed it My guess.I knew at the time that you were probably ugly, and because you were ugly, you felt very inferior.I just thought that I would approach you first, praise you for looking good, make you trust me completely, and then find an opportunity to hit you hard.

Later, you came to my house to secretly wear my clothes, I know, I still have the video.I think you may have a mental problem, but you are too stupid, I look at you like a monkey, you think you are perfect, you have a good disguise, but in fact I see it all.

On that day you suddenly appeared at Mr. Xu's place. I wanted to kill him that day. I didn't want to care about your life.I thought you were quite pitiful at the time, thinking that you were so pitiful, it would not be good to tease you again, but in the end you gave me a gift, and I took you back to Yanbian in order not to owe you favors, and later in prison, I just teased you play.

In short, my kindness to you is not sincere, at first I wanted to play with you, but later I felt sorry for you, so don't think I am kind, I am really bad, I don't deserve you. "

Yu Xunzhao didn't quite react. The male god brother's words were too informative, pitiful, teasing, these... It's a bit too much, but the male god brother is really good to himself, and this doesn't affect his kindness to himself ah!

"I..." The famous book was no longer available, and he stared at the male god brother blankly, "Then...but...you are really good to me, you have always taken care of me, besides, I like you It doesn't matter, I just like you, don't say you didn't hurt me, even... Even if you hurt me, it won't affect my feelings for you, or my opinion of you. "

"You still don't understand." Jinjiu Shi picked up the grass in the flower bed and tore it into several sections, "Your feelings for me, your liking for me, is just like what you said, you just want to be alone with me Do you want to have sex, or do you want to follow me all the time? None of these will work. First, I don’t like men, so I will never have sex with you. We can’t have a relationship. Second, you follow me and worship me. It's because of your wrong view of me. I don't want you to follow me, and I don't need you to worship me. I'm so annoying every day. I don't know when I have to stab someone with a knife. If you follow me, it will hinder me , you... are an obstacle and will hold me back, so stop following me, I'm annoying!"

Yu Xunzhao gradually understood, his heart was getting colder and colder, as cold as the fat moon in the sky, it was only itself in the vast night sky.

"In the prison... when we were in confinement...you clearly treated me..."

"That's no choice," Gin Ten ruthlessly said, and he turned his face away from his eyes, "Men are lower-body animals, and it doesn't matter who you are when you're addicted, there's no one else in that environment except you." Personally, I had no choice but to have sex with you. After I came out, I felt that you misunderstood me deeply. I was afraid that you would pester me, so I took you to take a bath. I didn’t expect to provoke you so much talk."

"So..." Yu Zhaozhao swallowed the sour water welling up in his throat with difficulty, "If you had a choice, you wouldn't be with me, would you?"

"Yes, I don't like stabbing men's assholes, and it's even more impossible with you."

"Then if everyone in the whole world dies, what about you and me?" Yu Xunchao seemed to feel that the blow wasn't hard enough, and wanted to make himself even more desperate.

"If this is not true for you," Jin Jiushi stood up irritably. Why can't this bastard understand people's words, so why should he provoke him severely? "I just like women with big breasts and big butts, do you have any? Even if all the women are dead, I would rather fuck other men. Even if all the men and women are dead, you are the only one left. I can't hold back Fuck you, then I'm not willing. So don't think about that day, give up, go wherever you like in the future, and don't dangle in front of my eyes."

Yu Xunchang didn't pause at all, and continued to ask: "Is it because of my face? Because I'm ugly, you don't want to?"

Ginjiu Ten didn't want him to have such self-defeating thoughts, so he turned his head and said to him: "There will be many, many unsatisfactory things in a person's life, and you can't attribute all the unsatisfactory things to your appearance."

So, you despise my soul, my heart, my person.So, you just look down on me, without any reason, just simply look down on me.

Ginjiu Ten's response was to hang a sickle on the soul, and this sickle finally cut off the connection that Yu Zhao looked for, and also cut off the happiness he felt during this period of time.

Yu Zhaozhao's heart was tumbling, hatred, anger, and all negative emotions rushed into his heart following the words of the male god brother who seemed to be relieved, but actually rejected.

He just breathed heavily, but he stood up strong, his eyes were filled with tears as he stared at the male god brother in the moonlight, but he forcibly held back the moment Ginjiu Ten frowned.

"Oh."

The author has something to say: excerpts from his poem "To You in 100 Years" Marina Tsvetaeva