Rebirth: Truth Does Not Dig Coal

Xu Hao is a person who doesn't pretend to be serious, so he hardly wastes his time thinking about the meaning of a certain sentence from a certain person.

But today was a bit abnormal, Xu Hao tossed and turned on the bed for two hours without falling asleep.

As soon as the eyes are closed, the brain starts to function, and the seemingly chaotic logic is involved in each visual image: several family photos, uncle, male lover, family ruin, suicide one after another...

Xu Hao opened his eyes distractedly, lay on the bed, and remembered the movie made by Zhang Xusheng and the others. Yao Qingming asked him, "Do you think life is painful?" "If a person dies because of you, then the murderer is you. Or himself?"

Xu Hao turned over from the bed, and scratched his hair in a breakdown. He never hoped that his brain would stop working like it is now.

After an unknown period of time, the cerebral cortex, which was transmitting signals rapidly, finally stopped, and Xu Hao fell asleep in a daze.

At the boundary between reality and dream, Xu Hao seems to be standing on a desolate land with dense vegetation.

A black stone monument.

A man stood in front of the stele, and suddenly knelt down straight as if a leg had been broken.

There was a cold stone tablet on his forehead, and the rain hit his body.

His lips fluttered and his Adam's apple trembled, and after a long time, he tore open a hole in his vocal cords with difficulty and silently.

"Don't... what..."

Not a single tear.But the dream was instantly overwhelmed by a great sense of suffocation, and the breath of death was almost close to him.

Xu Hao woke up startled.

Panting, he turned over and got out of bed, almost ran to the bathroom, then took a handful of cold water and splashed it on his face.

After splashing a few handfuls of water, Xu Hao managed to get out of the oppressive feeling in the dream just now. After calming down and thinking about it, he felt that his feeling was so real and inexplicable.

Inexplicably, but the hands are still shaking.

Xu Hao really couldn't sleep at all.

He simply put on a coat, went downstairs, poured himself a glass of warm milk, and walked to the fireplace again.

The photo on the wall looms in the firelight of the fireplace. Holding the milk, Xu Hao looks at Yan Ze when he was a child, and then at Yan Ze's uncle.

Looking at Xu Hao's two lifetimes, the combined years are only in his early thirties, and he has long since let go of most things.Life is for the future, it's no fun to hold on to the past.

But there is only one thing, Xu Hao has found countless reasons, but he has never found a particularly reasonable explanation.

Now?

Xu Hao glanced and saw several cigarette boxes on the table next to him.Xu Hao put down the milk glass, picked up the cigarette case and opened it to see that it was full.

Xu Hao picked up another lighter and walked to the viewing platform on the first floor.

Pulling open the glass door, Xu Hao took a breath of the cool air on the snow-capped mountains at night, rubbed his hands, and then closed the door.

Xu Hao sat down on the first step of the viewing balcony and smoked quite skillfully, but he choked when he smoked.Xu Hao remembered that this was the first cigarette he inhaled into his lungs in his life. In the chilly breeze, Xu Hao looked at the cigarette wrapped in his fingertips, feeling a little funny.

Xu Hao took another puff of the cigarette, this puff was slow, and the strength of the puff was not too strong, and he gradually got used to it.Xu Hao looked at the Milky Way pouring down from the sky, and white air overflowed from his mouth, mixed with smoke.His eyes wandered along the horizon, and his brain diverged with nicotine.

There is an idea, so outrageous, so outrageous that Xu Hao can lose sleep.

But if you really calm down and think deeply, it is not impossible.

There are even fucking reasonable explanations for many things that happened to Xu Hao that could not be explained before.

The cigarette was sucked into the mouth, filtered and absorbed in the lungs, when Xu Hao exhaled the smoke again, he remembered the last time he saw Yan Ze in his previous life.

Before Xu Hao went abroad.

Before their family was tossed and almost went bankrupt, and his father was almost sent to the bureau due to financial disputes.

On the campus of Q University, Yan Ze came to find Xu Hao shortly after he was discharged from the hospital after a fight, with bandages still on his body.

Xu Hao didn't remove the bandage, and there was a big patch on the bridge of his nose.As soon as the two met each other, Xu Hao immediately felt that there was nowhere to vent his evil fire, but it would be meaningless to fight again.Xu Hao walked past Yan Ze and was stopped by Yan Ze, obviously Yan Ze just wanted to stop him.

So Xu Hao turned sideways, glanced at Yan Ze, and said in a very rude tone, "Get out of the way."

Yan Ze turned his head to look at Xu Hao, "Xu Hao, what do you mean?"

Xu Hao endured and endured, but still couldn't hold back the anger, turned around and pushed Yan Ze, "What do I mean, I want to ask you what do you mean, is it cool to sleep with your brother and girlfriend, to show how awesome you are, right? ? Isn’t it just Lin Xiao? I figured it out, you love to sleep, you love to do whatever you want, where do you fall in love, don’t fuck around in front of my eyes, I’m annoying, understand, I’m annoying!”

Pushed by Xu Hao, Yan Ze took a step back. He looked at Xu Hao, nodded, and said, "Okay, okay." Then he kicked hard on the wall next to him, and Yan Ze yelled fiercely, "You fucking So take that woman to heart? Can't you see what she is?"

Xu Hao and Yan Ze yelled at each other, louder, "I don't need you to tell me what kind of person I like, my girlfriend! I don't need you! You are a cold-blooded animal, I I can do anything for Lin Xiao, even if she doesn't love me at all, can you? You don't understand love at all, you don't love at all! You are not worthy to educate my feelings!"

Yan Ze suddenly raised his head, and stared at Xu Hao glaringly, neither of them lost the breath.Yan Zehong looked at Xu Hao's face and yelled, "I don't understand? I don't deserve it? Xu Hao, you can do it, you can do it! Just because you are so aggressive, you hit me, you fucking hit me, and you want to break up with me, Do you take our relationship seriously? We have known each other for several years, and she has only known you for a few months. I am important and she is important!"

As soon as this was mentioned, Xu Hao threw away all the self-control left. He grabbed Yan Ze by the collar and shouted, "You fucking know, you fucking know that you are important to me! Yan Ze , how many years have we known each other, how do I treat you, you feel your own conscience! You fucking treat me like this now, you are just kicking my feelings like a ball, you fucking think I am a fool , is a laughing stock! You play with me, Yan Ze, do you still have a conscience, Yan Ze..."

Thinking of all the things in the past, the more Xu Hao yelled, the more sad he became. At the end of the yelling, his momentum almost disappeared.Xu Hao couldn't hold back, raised his hand and rubbed his eyes, wiping his tears away.Afraid of embarrassment, he took a breath and endured it, and then held it back.

As a result, although Xu Hao was tense, the person opposite did not. Yan Ze waved away Xu Hao's hand, his eyes were red, and tears flowed down his eyes. Yan Ze wiped his face and said, "I kicked your feelings like a ball? I played with you?" Speaking of this, I can't continue.Yan Ze wiped his eyes fiercely a few times, then choked up and said, "I'm not important to you at all, you can throw me away if you come to anyone, and now you want to break up with me because of her, huh... You don't pay attention to me at all! You don't understand anything! Huh... Who's playing, Xu Hao..."

Xu Hao rubbed the tears in his eyes, his mouth was bitter, his heart was bitter, his eyes were red from rubbing, and he cursed, "You cry, you fucking, you made me green, you are still wronged, you are still wronged Reasonable. I understand now that we are not suitable to be friends at all. From now on, you go your way and I go mine. Let's not hinder each other. Disappear from each other's eyes immediately. Hurry up Go, go quickly!"

With that said, Xu Hao took the lead and left.

Leaving Yan Ze there alone, Xu Hao didn't look back, and he didn't know what happened to him afterwards.

This is the last side of his previous life. Xu Hao didn't expect that he would forget everything else, but he could remember this one so clearly.

Xu Hao took a long drag on his cigarette.

Try to keep yourself in the most sober and objective angle, and analyze the whole incident.

The turning point of all this was Lin Xiao.

Before Lin Xiao appeared, his relationship with Yan Ze was almost unbreakable.

After Lin Xiao appeared, he immediately collapsed.

I thought it was because of his love rival, but now that I think about it, does Yan Ze like Lin Xiao?

dislike.

Then the problem should be on Xu Hao himself.

Xu Hao took another puff of cigarette, very long and slow.

The shredded tobacco burns slowly, burning out the thoughts into a concrete appearance.

Yan Ze was indeed quite stingy for a while, for the things he likes, he has a strong desire to possess and protect himself. For example, he used to maintain his big red Ferrari like his own son.

And friends.

damn it.

friend.

Once a certain layer of protective paper was punctured, and then recalled some things, it turned out to be so natural and reasonable.

Following this logic, in his previous life, Yan Ze didn't treat him as a joke, nor did he play with him.

And Xu Hao's family was run out without warning, and it might not be Yan Ze's hands at all.

Xu Hao flicked off the cigarette butt in his hand, and then took the last puff of cigarette suddenly.

I felt ridiculous and unbelievable in my heart.

The truth in front of him is so reasonable, but it is so difficult to face, Xu Hao really does not really hope that this conjecture is true.

Xu Hao threw the cigarette butt into the ashtray beside his hand, then turned his head.His body was frozen to the bone, Xu Hao, mixed with the cold wind, stared hard at the upstairs of the building behind him.

Yan Ze.

Don't you fucking love me secretly?