West's Summer [Comprehensive English and American]

West was sure that Merlin was definitely angry with him.

Since he used his ability in full view that night, in order not to be burned to death as a wizard, he had to use telepathy to modify the memories of Arthur and Gawain.And since the sword was almost drawn out in the forest, until now, three full days have passed.Apart from the necessary daily communication, the black-haired mage didn't say a word to him. Even if he had to speak, he often spoke concisely, trying to minimize the contact between them.The habit of playing some little magic with the young man has also disappeared. Even though the two of them clearly still live in the same narrow small room, it seems that they are far away from each other.

In this regard, West felt very at a loss and felt aggrieved.

"What's the matter with the two of you?"

Soon, perhaps because the awkward atmosphere between them was too obvious, even Gaius, who had never been involved in the private affairs of juniors, noticed something was wrong between them.Seeing that Merlin once again picked up a sandwich and ran out the door at dawn, without even saying hello, the old doctor patted West, who was pretending to be immersed in the soup, and pulled him up from the bowl, with a serious expression on his face. Somewhat strange: "How did you provoke Merlin?"

"I also want to know."

Throwing down the bowl listlessly, the boy leaned back in his chair, looking at the ceiling with the same confusion as Gaius.

In fact, this sentence is not accurate.

Of course he understood that Merlin's abnormality had something to do with his behavior in the forest that day.Maybe it's because he committed too many murders, or maybe it's because he used his ability in front of King Arthur despite the mage's repeated strong statements... However, no matter which of the two is the closest to the truth, he really can't understand Why should the boy be so angry about it.After all, everything he did was for them—he didn't have the habit of being merciless to his enemies, and it was even more difficult to accept that people he cared about would bleed in front of him again.Although the methods were a little more drastic and almost exposed himself, he protected Arthur and Merlin. Isn't this the best result?

——I really didn't expect that I have been an "old man" who has lived for more than half a century, and I would still be upset and uneasy because of the attitude of a young boy.

Sullenly watching Gaius pick up the soup he hadn't finished and put it aside, West pursed his mouth, a bit confused about the slight tearing feeling in his heart like a lead weight.

"In that case, why don't you talk to him?"

Put the herbs to be milled today together with the mortar into the hands of the brown-haired boy.The old doctor glanced at his really sluggish face, thought for a while, sighed, and pulled the thing out of his hand again: "I know Merlin, he is not the kind of person who loses his temper for no reason. He told me what happened in the forest, although I don’t know what he is worried about, but if you don’t ask, you will never know what you want to know.”

"Go ahead, I'll give you half a day off today...but when you come back, I have to clean my leech tank well."

"...ohgod, I never want to touch that disgusting thing again in my life."

"Don't hold it against me, boy. Without it, half the people of Camelot would die for want of medicine."

"So the only thing I won't put in my mouth in this day and age is the potion you made, Gaius."

"..."

Although he said so, he stood up as he said.West quickly dodged the medicine pestle that the old doctor was about to wave, stuck out his tongue, turned around and disappeared into his and Merlin's room.

……

Because he studied the spells late at night and walked in a hurry in the morning, when Merlin remembered that he didn't seem to hide the magic book under the floor as usual, he was still a little flustered.After all, Gaius' hut is a public place in another sense, and West, adhering to the deep-rooted political consciousness of the 21st century, never messes with his things, the possibility of discovering his negligence is extremely slim.Therefore, when Arthur went to the Council Hall to hold a round table meeting, he secretly ran back home from the palace, lest the secret he had hidden for several years would be exposed because of this small mistake.

Hurriedly stepping over the herbs that Gaius had temporarily piled up, the black-haired mage stared at the dirt all over the floor for a while, then remembered that he didn't need to clean it up since West moved in.However, when he finally heaved a sigh of relief and went to push the wooden door of his room, only to see the young man who was supposed to deliver the potion for Gaius at this time leaning against the window with his arms crossed and thinking about something, he found himself In fact, it is still too early to worry.

"Merlin."

He didn't seem to be surprised by his appearance—in fact, Merlin had always doubted whether anyone could get within 100 meters of West without his knowledge.Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that the magic book that had been placed next to his pillow was gone, and the bed sheets and quilts were also neatly spread. The servant guessed that it must have been put away by his roommate.

"I'll put it away for you." You could tell what the boy was thinking from the point of his gaze.West shrugged indifferently, giving him a complete peace of mind.

He hesitated, then nodded.Merlin nodded his thanks to the young man: "I'm sorry to trouble you."

"Where." After observing every change in his expression, he naturally knew that the boy still couldn't let go of his grudge against him.West sighed, his eyes a little helpless:

"So, can we have a proper talk now?"

... whatever.

After thinking about it, he didn't refuse.Merlin, who was also not very happy in the past three days, turned his head and looked at those shockingly blue eyes like the ocean.Obviously so suitable to be clear like water, full of reassuring tenderness, but at this moment she is extremely lonely because of herself.

As if being torn desperately by something, he felt a sudden pain in his heart.

……

There must always be a place worth stopping in everyone's life, so that they can learn how to move forward without losing their way.

At least that's what Merlin thought until that night.Although he looks innocent and ignorant of worldly affairs, it doesn't mean that he has never faced the fickleness of the world.No matter life or death, no matter true love or hatred, the long thread of fate twisted round and round in his palm, gradually wrapping an invulnerable armor around his heart.He has always been easily entangled by those illusory but traceable things. Therefore, now that he has personally confirmed the adage of fate time and time again, he seems unable to convince himself that what he saw and heard in the forest at that time was just The druid and the illusion that he was too careful.

Indeed, to everyone, that boy is like an eternal summer that never grows old.Although everything is brilliant, the sky is clear and the moon is bright, you can see the sunlight flowing quietly from every corner of life.But it will also be eroded by a heavy rain falling from the gray sky at any time, and it will be drenched from head to toe.

He scares me more than I've ever felt, Merlin thought.In West, the mage can see the reasonable cruelty, the innocent bloodthirsty, and even the extremely calm madness.They are obviously the most irreconcilable paradoxes in the world, but now they appear in the eyes of a person who is sinking and floating in the darkness, standing on the edge of the abyss, and it seems that a slight push will lead to doom.

"Why do you have to carry everything?"

Sitting on the edge of the bed, looking down at his own textured palm.West quietly listened to Merlin's scattered words in the air, and could easily piece together the outline that the boy had drawn for him in his heart.

——He can understand everything, but he can't understand himself in the end.

He raised his head in a daze, and met Merlin's light gray pupils which were as clean and moist as a summer rain curtain, the boy smiled self-deprecatingly: "You have seen those things on me, Merlin."

Nod.He remembered that he had just picked West up from the wilderness. In order to heal his wounds, he had caught a glimpse of the old scars criss-crossing on his back amidst the blood red eyes.Although the wound had been scabbed and peeled off for many years, one could vaguely see some shadows of the heart-wrenching pain that day.

"That's the cage in which I'm imprisoned."

Together with Adelaide, they have been endowed with many different meanings - the past, the future, shame, glory... But no matter what, for West, it only represents what he has to accomplish obsession.He owed so much and had such a shackle in his heart, he was almost willing to sink all the way in the hatred given by Yi Laizhe until he died.

So, let go?

What else can he let go?

"You shouldn't be doing this, West."

Leaning against the door, quietly watching the boy's peaceful hysteria.Merlin's eyes were as deep as blue-black lead clouds in the rain.

He didn't know who it was that dragged West into the road of revenge.But there was no question that the man had nearly ruined him.

"So, what then?"

For no reason, I thought of Morgana, the princess who was so sincere and beautiful, but now she was swallowed by hatred and darkness.Merlin shook his head sadly, realizing that he simply couldn't bear that West would become like that one day.

He didn't want to see him fall, not at all.

"Do you think you can feel at ease when you have completed your revenge, Wei?"

The mage said so, but the boy's expression was still almost indifferent.Merlin didn't care about the inexplicable pain in his chest that was about to suffocate, but closed his eyes, gritted his teeth to hide the watery light in his eyes:

"Or, do you want to be driven by hatred like this, until one day you kill the person you love with your own hands again?"

"..."

Merlin knew that this was a forbidden sentence.The druid tells Emerys that the boy came here in blood, because he once sent the one he loved to hell.But what the old priest didn't say was that it was precisely because of the shackles of this life that he forged with his own hands, mentioning Adelaide in front of West would always be a heartbreaking tragedy.

"Do you think I want to be like this?"

Reasonably, the brown-haired boy was immediately irritated.He stood up abruptly, with an expression as if Merlin had just gouged out a piece of his heart with a knife, and even those blue eyes that were originally calm were swallowed by blood red.

"Yeah, Merlin. I'm cruel, I'm unscrupulous, I'll kill everyone who wants to hurt me... Any of you can accuse me of that, it's because no one can understand what that lunatic has done to me What."

She laughed sharply and wildly, but her eyes were red but no tears fell from her eyes.West knew he was dangerously out of control, but he didn't want to stop:

"I tried it, can you imagine? I can pretend I don't care about the wounds on my body, I can forget the fear that my blood is slowly drying up, I can't even apologize for all the torture I have encountered Back to justice... But, tell me, how can I forgive that bastard for not letting go of such a small child? Even if I humbled myself and begged him to save her, I just ignored him and watched Alai Died miserably in the end?!"

"Tell me, Merlin. If there is no hatred, what else can I have?"

The complex air flow kept churning in the room, and the muffled sound of heavy objects falling to the ground could be heard from time to time.Countless time fragments mixed with memories rushed to the young man, his past, his pain, Merlin's hesitation, Merlin's pity...Scenes, one by one, like the turbulent flow of time and space that almost tore him apart, is about to tear apart. Shatter reason to pieces.

Almost panicked and ran into the mage's consciousness, he was stunned, and his expression became more and more distorted.

"Whoa, look what else I found."

Under the power runaway, he didn't even know that he had broken the principles he had always followed.Inadvertently peeking into Merlin's memory, and seeing the prophecy that the druid priest gave to Emerys, West unconsciously raised his eyebrows in mockery: "The fate of you and King Arthur? Me?"

"Serena!!" Instinctively felt that he had to say something for this, Merlin clutched his forehead that was aching from the baptism of psychic ability, trying to hold the boy who was obviously not in a normal state.

However, it was completely unexpected.The explosion reached a certain critical point, and just when he thought that West would lose control even more crazily, the boy who had always been miraculous calmed down again miraculously.All the rage and reluctance disappeared from his face, replaced by Merlin's familiar yet unfamiliar extreme peace.

"So, everything you do, alienation, suspicion, anger... is because an uncontrollable and predictable me will make your fate more difficult."

Seeing the expression of the black-haired mage hesitant to speak, West smiled:

"You worry about me, not about myself, but about the day when I will hurt Arthur intentionally or unintentionally, don't you?"

Because Arthur is your destiny, you can give up everything for him, even your life, let alone me.

No, it's not like that.

Instinctively wanted to speak up to refute, but found that he didn't know what to say.Merlin looked at the boy sadly and helplessly.He can't guarantee that what West said has never appeared in his mind, and he can't be ashamed that he really has no selfishness about it...Obviously, he never thought of hurting anyone.

Therefore, the mage was only silent in the end.

"I see."

As long as the boy's silence was the default, West suddenly felt a little dazed.He rubbed his forehead, glanced at the messy room, and there was a trace of pain and fatigue in his eyes unexpectedly.

——Why did things turn out like this.

He closed his eyes and opened them again, as if in this way he could pretend that it was just a nightmare, and he woke up like a dream.The teenager knew that he should apologize to Merlin for his loss of control and yelling, express his understanding of the fate of the mage bearing Albion, and promise that he would never hurt any of them, and then go to Gaius that damn water tank... However, even though there are so many things to do, he still only feels empty and at a loss.

"I'll go out for a while, and I'll clean up the room when I come back."

Leaving aside Merlin, who lowered his head and couldn't see his expression clearly, Westerla opened the door, paused, and finally said so.

He seemed to be starting to get a little homesick.