white sparrow

The so-called memory is nothing but the alternation of light and shadow and time.

The white bird suddenly appeared in Lu Lin'an's life, not on any special day, and there was no special omen. After growing up, Lu Lin'an roughly speculated that those who had been born before he was born, through the fragmentary chat content of the adults. happened.

At that time, Mother Baique was desperate, so she had to bring Baique to seek refuge with Lu Linan's mother. The two of them had been classmates for ten years.

Baique's mother was originally an intellectual with a good family background. Her biggest dream was to go to Vienna to play the piano, but her family was in trouble, so she was forced to marry an electrician with a stable job. After several years of marriage, there were constant frictions. The man still couldn't give her the romance she wanted, so she divorced and took away the white bird who had just entered elementary school.

Maybe just because I met the white sparrow for the first time that day is enough to make everything in my memory jump with joy.In the evening when the residual heat of the afternoon has not yet dissipated, the evening sun that stretches the child's figure infinitely, for Lu Lin'an at that age, the long wind that unintentionally passes by is gentle and warm, puffing up his sweaty shirt and caressing him With flushed cheeks, except for the missing glass marbles, there is no trouble worth mentioning.

Back home after fooling around in the Tang Dynasty, two strangers appeared in the originally empty yard, a tall woman in a long white dress, and a child of the same age, wearing a clean white shirt and black overalls, holding hands. After the woman's hand met Lu Lin'an's gaze, she immediately turned her head away and continued to stare at the embroidery on her mother's skirt.

Lu Linan was greeted by the red-eyed mother and held her hand.

"An'an, this is the new Aunt Bai. She is a good friend of my mother. This is her son. He will live next door to our house from now on. Can you two get along well?"

Although the promise was good at the time, it was difficult for Lu Linan to instantly get close to Bai Que with just a few words from his mother, because the new kid rarely went out, only the news from the house The sound of the piano and the silver-white light leaking from the room at night reminded Lu Lin'an that there are people living in this house now.

The first time the two of them spoke was a month later, and Lu Linan, who had been playing wildly outside all afternoon, returned home and wanted to take a shower with the water pipe in the yard, but he heard sobbing sounds coming from the room, and ghosts came from outside the window. He poked out half of his head furtively, wanting to come over to see what happened.

Bai Que, with its back to him, was sitting in front of a piano, while Aunt Bai was standing beside him holding a wooden ruler.

"Crack!" The sound of the wooden ruler waving the air startled Lu Lin'an.Aunt Bai slapped Bai Que's thin body in the palm of Bai Que's palm and flinched, but she resisted and did not take her hand back, allowing Aunt Bai to pump five times.

"Where is the retake?" Aunt Bai's gentle voice could not detect any emotion.

"On...the sixteenth...the sixteenth note..." Baique's immature voice was broken by sobs.

"do it again."

At that time, Lu Lin'an was tone-deaf, and laymen wanted to applaud everything they saw that was weird, so they played it again because they didn't understand.

Many years later, Lu Lin'an and Bai Que mentioned this incident, saying that they saw Bai Que crying out of breath, and the big teardrops rolled around in the eye sockets, half of which fell and kept half, mixing with sweat Their faces are blurred together, they look so pitiful.

After finishing speaking, Bai Que let out a cold snort: "Fuck you, you can see a ghost when I'm behind your back. Don't cry yourself out and push it on me."

"...Haha, really?" Lu Linan, who was lying on the bed and playing with his mobile phone, said haha ​​and wanted to pass this topic aside.

At that time, Lu Linan's head had a flash of inspiration, and he ran home and called out Lin's mother who had been taking a nap for several hours, and made a fuss that the white bird's mother had something to do with her.

Lin's mother knocked on the door of the next room in a daze, and dismissed the white bird's mother, while he went around the road and turned into the white bird's room through the window, frightening the white bird who was still practicing the piano.

"what are you doing?"

The white bird didn't react for a while, and saw Lu Linan pick up the wooden ruler that was put aside, open the back cover of the piano, stuff the ruler in, poke it to the end, and just mess around. When the two mothers returned to the scene, they would Only the shocked white sparrow and the broken piano keys remained.

Mother Lin, who was sober from anger, rushed over and dragged her to the yard, stripped her pants and spanked her buttocks. It was the first time that Lu's father saw his wife angry when he came home halfway, and he couldn't stop him.

"I really wondered if there was something wrong with you at the time. After so many years, if you want to say what impresses me the most about you, it is the way your mother spanks your ass, with tears and snot, and trying not to cry It’s too miserable to speak out,” Bai Que stopped writing his homework, and thought for a long time, as if recalling some unbearable memory, and continued to say expressionlessly, “Lu Lin’an, do you think you are stupid? Very much."

Mama Lin just seemed to be heavy handed, but in fact there was a lot of thunder and rain. Lu Linan lay on the bed at home all night and put on his pants the next morning.

"Auntie, I'm sorry." Lu Lin'an apologized to Aunt Bai, but his eyes glanced at Bai Que at the side, and consciously shifted his gaze after being avoided by Bai Que.

"Hui Shu, let An An learn piano with you in the future, so that Bai Que also has a companion. Before you find a job, how about 100 yuan an hour?"

"If you come to learn, what kind of money will you give? They have sent a new piano."

In the midst of a few words of bargaining between the two women, Lu Lin'an's carefree and unrestrained childhood came to an abrupt end. He had to sit on that grueling piano stool for three hours every day, practicing the basics of Bayer over and over again.

"Put your hands like this, so that the span of your hands is wider." The white sparrow pinched Lu Lin'an's stiff fingers and arranged them in the correct shape. Seeing that Lu Lin'an couldn't place them correctly, he could only demonstrate to him again.Aunt Bai found a job as a music teacher, teaching junior high school students to sing, and usually let the two children practice piano at home during class.This was originally a good opportunity to be lazy, but Baique didn't know how to be flexible.

"It's wrong, it's not this note. Play it slowly, not so fast," Bai Que played the wrong place again, "Do it again."

Lu Lin'an, who had practiced at Baique's house for two months, couldn't take it anymore, so he sneaked out of the house one day during class.

"Brother An, can you learn such an elegant thing?" Fat Moon Ban fanned Lu Linan, who was sweating all over after escaping from the prison, and then handed Wang Yifan the iced Coke bought by running errands.

"If you don't learn it, you won't be able to do it." Lu Linan put the Coke on the flower bed after taking a sip, posed in the air as if playing the piano, and played it twice in a serious manner.

It’s been a long time since I saw Lu Lin’an’s people rubbing their hands excitedly, discussing whether they should go to the amusement park to have a good time, or go to see if the newly opened video game city can’t get in. They sneaked out without arguing. Lu Linan was caught by the white sparrow.

"Mom asked me to call you back to class." The white bird was sweating profusely, and her fair cheeks were flushed, which seemed to be easy for him to find.

"Is it because you are always pestering Brother An, so that Brother An can't come out to play with us?" When the crowd saw the white bird, they were so angry that they surrounded the white bird and looked up and down.

"Don't scare him," Lu Lin'an hurriedly jumped off the railing, and put his arms around Bai Que's thin shoulders, separating Fat Moon and Ban who was closest to him, "You play with us, just pretend you didn't find me, play We'll go back in a while? They're all my buddies, and they won't tell Aunt Bai."

"No." Bai Que shook his head, grabbed Lu Lin'an's wrist, and pulled him back.

"Okay, that's the way." Lu Lin'an shrugged his shoulders at the bitter-faced little friends, leaving behind their true call of Ange Ange, and pushed the white bird on the back to trot.

"Do you want me to play the piano for you again?"

"You want to play it yourself." The white sparrow ran a little out of breath, and his speech was a little awkward, but fortunately, he articulated clearly, and Lu Lin'an could understand it.

"Okay, I like playing the piano so much." Lu Linan ran, opened his mouth, let the wind pour into his mouth, and made ah's shouting. It was fun to vent his dissatisfaction.

There was a lot of free time in elementary school. When the two entered junior high school, they couldn't practice for an entire afternoon like before. The white sparrow practiced the piano until the evening. Lu Lin'an was often ready to wash up and go to bed. Practice piano in your room.

Often when the family has rested, Lu Linan tiptoedly opened the door of the room, took the sneakers from the living room into the room, threw them out of the window, stepped on the desk and turned out of the window, and then ran to the White Sparrow House and knocked on the window frame twice.

I am coming.

The people sitting on the piano bench seemed to have gotten used to Lu Lin'an's arrival, and moved a little to the side to make room for Lu Lin'an.

"Why are you still playing?" Lu Linan took off his down jacket while lowering his voice, and put it on the white bird's legs. In the winter, the white bird's house was reluctant to turn on the air conditioner, and his hands and feet were cold, and he was still sitting there playing the piano. .

"Liszt's notation is so difficult." Baique gathered the down jacket tighter, pointed out the piece of notation that got stuck, and tried again, but it still got stuck.

"Then you step on the pedal, and I will help you." Lu Lin'an stepped on the pedal without letting go after speaking.

"Opportunistic, my mother can hear it next door." The white sparrow patted his feet away to prevent him from making trouble.

"I'll play for you, you rest for a while." Lu Linan moved to the middle of the bench again, and squeezed together with the white bird for a while, only to see the white bird put his hands on the keys into the pocket of the down jacket as if compromising .The two of them were like this in elementary school. Aunt Bai assigned Bai Que too heavy a task of playing the piano, and Bai Que was overwhelmed, so Lu Linan sneaked into his house to help him play, and Aunt Bai couldn't tell when she was preparing lessons next door , This has been done several times, but it has never been discovered.

Lu Lin'an plays the piano recklessly, but he doesn't go out of his way. Unlike Baique, who can make every note perfect, every note of his is on the beat. Watching him play the piano is like watching an acrobat walking on a tightrope. An entertainer, if he misses half a centimeter, he will fall to pieces. You can't help but sweat for him. You don't come back to your senses until he listens to the sound. Because he is free, the music becomes agile, and even caters to his fingertips. dance.

After closing the song, there was a warm feeling on Lu Lin'an's arm. It was the white sparrow leaning on him, pillowing on his shoulder, and pressing down. The neck was furry, but it couldn't feel any actual weight.

"Keep playing." He heard the white sparrow say.

"Go to my house tomorrow?" The white bird's body temperature distracted Lu Lin'an, so he leaned on it, flipped through the music score, and changed to a simpler one, so as not to make many mistakes and attract Aunt Bai.

"My mom is home tomorrow and I don't want to leave her alone."

"Come to play at my house that weekend? My sister misses you so much, she looked for you everywhere last time."

"it is good."

It wasn't until Aunt Bai's voice came from next door, telling the bird to rest, that the task for tonight was over, and the two of them were able to close the somewhat worn-out cover of the piano.

"I won't go back and get up early tomorrow morning." Lu Lin'an said and got into the white bird's bed, and the white bird didn't say whether he wanted to, but just asked him to move outside a little. When we were young, the two often slept in the same bed. When I grow up, the same bed is a bit cramped.

"If only I had the same talent as you." Lu Linan was sleepy, but he heard Bai Que say this when he was half asleep and half awake.

"What talent do I have?" Lu Lin'an was so sleepy that he couldn't speak clearly, and searched for the answer from his chaotic mind.

"My mother said that I played the piano too much. Playing the piano is a very free thing, but I feel so tired, and I am so afraid that she will watch me play the piano."

"If you don't like it, we won't play it." Lu Linan hugged Bai Que in a daze, and buried his face in Bai Que's chest, as if he refused to talk.

"No, I'm afraid mom will be sad." After Bai Que finished speaking, he put his cold feet on Lu Lin'an's lap, making Lu Lin'an shiver from the cold.

"Good night, Lu Lin'an." Seeing Lu Lin'an's surprised appearance when he woke up from his sleep, Bai Que smiled happily with his brows bent, his light-colored pupils rippling with the joy of mischief, and then he smiled and closed his eyes, just Leave it to Lu Linan's fluttering eyelashes and his pretended steady breathing.

They have been so close since they were young, and they are so natural and accustomed to it. Habits are such a terrible thing that Lu Linan never thinks about the future after being separated from the white bird. For him who is hugging the white bird, only the present time is slowly flowing into the past. , what is the future?It's just something that doesn't belong to him.