爱 就 爱 了

On the fifth day of the lunar new year, the weather will turn fine, so Jiang Yifeng discussed with Ye Xiaoming to go to a hot spring in the suburbs together, and then come back after spending the night.Ye Xiaoming had been lying on the bed for so many days, his whole body was uncomfortable, and his spirit was very listless. He didn't want to go at first, but thinking that the whole family would not have a good time during the Spring Festival because of him, he reluctantly agreed.

Zhou Ying didn't go because her daughter was leaving early the next morning.After lunch, Director Ye drove the teachers, and Jiang Yifeng took Ye Xiaoming and the two children to the hot spring resort hotel on Linhai Mountain in an hour and a half by expressway.

Most of the people who came to travel from other places have left, and the hotel seems relatively quiet.When Jiang Yifeng pushed Ye Xiaoming into the hotel lobby with his two children, he saw his mother talking happily with another family.

"Yifeng, come here quickly, Mr. Lu, you still remember!" Teacher He waved at Jiang Yifeng.

Everyone got together, Jiang Yifeng and the others had no choice but to rush over to say hello.

Mr. Lu is a colleague of Mr. He, who teaches physics. He retired earlier than Mr. He. His hair is already gray, but his spirit is hale and hearty, and he speaks brightly.Teacher Lu's lover also gossiped with Teacher He and Teacher Shen.

"Yifeng, this is Teacher Lu's daughter, Jiawen. Remember, you used to play together in the office when you were young." Teacher He held Lu Jiawen's hand with a look of affection.

Lu Jiawen looked like a professional woman, even though she was not impressed by such a scene, she behaved very decently, saying hello to Jiang Yifeng with a faint smile on her face.

The warning light in Jiang Yifeng's head turned on again.What's the situation? This woman is obviously unmarried, and his mother planned it beforehand?

He felt that it was not suitable to stay here for a long time, so he quickly suggested that everyone go to the room to rest for a while, and the elders will talk slowly after soaking in the hot spring.The room was reserved in advance, because Zhou Ying didn't come, Jiang Yifeng said that he took care of Ye Xiaoming last time, so this time it's fine for him to take care of him, so that the elders can rest at ease.In this way, the two children will sleep with their grandparents, and the two fathers will live in one room.

Ye Xiaoming's body was too weak, he already felt dizzy in the car, he was still struggling in front of his parents and outsiders, he stopped trying to hide it as soon as he entered the room, his eyes were closed and his face was pale.Jiang Yifeng wanted him to go to bed and rest, but as soon as he picked him up, he vomited.

The vomit covered both of them, and the sour smell was terrible.Ye Xiaoming closed his eyes and asked Jiang Yifeng to help him wash and change his clothes, feeling extremely depressed.

Don't want to struggle, don't want to persist, everything is meaningless, life is too tiring, it is better to give up.Negative emotions slowly controlled Ye Xiaoming's spirit when his body was weakening. He felt that even breathing was a burden, and that living was a burden. He hated others looking at him with worried eyes, hated wearing a mask, and didn't want to pretend to be himself anymore , He hated the feeling of powerlessness, hated the unfair fate, so he stopped thinking, gave up on himself, let himself sink into the black turbid vortex, and could no longer see or hear any information from the outside world.

Jiang Yifeng was sure that Ye Xiaoming was not asleep, but he called a few times but he didn't answer.In the past few days, Ye Xiaoming has been so decadent that he doesn't seem like a human being, and is as hollow as a body without a soul. Seeing him suffering like this, Jiang Yifeng feels his heart is blocked.He didn't want to bicker with him anymore, he didn't want to tease him anymore, he wanted to share his stress, he wanted to soothe his pain, but he didn't know how to do it, didn't know what to do to make him feel better.

The rooms Jiang Yifeng booked had their own small hot springs. He called his parents to let them take care of themselves. They could soak themselves in the room or go to the open-air public hot spring in the hotel. He also told them not to let the children soak for too long.He also called Ye Xiaoming's parents and said that Ye Xiaoming was not feeling well, so they would not go out.

There are more than [-] open-air hot springs, each of which is different.Grandparents took their children to enjoy different hot springs everywhere, and they didn't feel cold at all.The children were blushing, drinking water and eating snacks in the rest area, and having fun.

Jiang Yifeng changed swimming trunks for himself and Ye Xiaoming, then wrapped him in a bathrobe, and carried him to the hot spring pool outside the room.

Ye Xiaoming, who took off his bathrobe, was really too thin, his ribs were distinct, his joints were swollen and protruding, there was a long scar on his back from the neck down, his whole body was unhealthy white, and his blood circulation was poor, his hands and feet were cold.It wasn't until the hot spring water reached his arm that he opened his eyes to look around, then closed them again, and fell into an unconscious state.

Jiang Yifeng found a rock under the water and sat down, leaning against the pool wall, took Ye Xiaoming's arm from his neck, hugged him and sat on his lap, leaning his back against his chest, and resting his head on his shoulder.He hugged Ye Xiaoming's waist tightly with one hand, and gently rubbed his hands and feet with the other.

"Is this interesting? We are not relatives, so you don't need to serve me like this. Or you are too heavy-mouthed, interested in paralyzed bodies, or like to watch people incontinence. Don't you think this pool smells like urine? Is it comfortable to soak in my urine? I might have pulled it and stuck to your thigh." Ye Xiaoming closed his eyes and said slowly without any ups and downs in his voice.

"Your mouth stinks!" Jiang Yifeng squeezed Ye Xiaoming's chin, turned his face away, and kissed him without thinking.

A long and gentle kiss, delicate and silky, there is no sex, only caress, not asking, but giving.When they parted, Ye Xiaoming's face was rosy from the hot spring, his eyes without glasses were steamy and misty, and his slightly parted lips trembled a little, looking fragile and helpless.

"I don't have any special hobbies. I did this because of you." Jiang Yifeng looked straight into Ye Xiaoming's eyes and said calmly, "I can't share your pain, but I am willing to share your pressure and burden in other areas. I can also give you a shoulder to lean on, so that you have a breathing space when you are tired."

"why?"

"I don't want to see you like this, I feel uncomfortable when you are like this."

"why?"

"Where are there so many reasons, I don't know why, I will tell you when I know."

Ye Xiaoming smiled.In the vortex, he felt that hands were pulling him out, and a gust of wind blew away the dense black mist, revealing a ray of light.

"Get up, I'm a little out of breath and sleepy." Ye Xiaoming leaned on Jiang Yifeng's shoulder and closed his eyes again.

This time, Ye Xiaoming slept for a long time and slept very comfortably.No pain, no nightmares, no need to shout, no need to struggle, the body is as light as a dandelion, riding the wind, floating freely between the sky and the earth.

At dinner time, with the addition of Teacher Lu's family of three, the atmosphere became more lively.Jiang Yifeng is not stupid, he has already seen Teacher He's careful thinking, but parents must give face, so he sat next to Lu Jiawen very cooperatively, and served the lady with grace.

When taking a hot spring in the afternoon, Mr. He had already inquired clearly.Lu Jiawen is an executive of an insurance company. She was in a relationship before. The man was found cheating when he was discussing marriage. After the breakup, she concentrated on her career. She is now in her early thirties. Looking down on each other, parents are having a terrible headache.

Lu Jiawen is indeed outstanding in both appearance and ability, and it is normal to have a high vision, but Teacher He feels that her son is also first-class. Although she is divorced and has children, it is enough to match her.She told Teacher Lu's lover what she wanted, and the two hit it off immediately, and decided to match the two children immediately.

Everyone could see the meaning of Mr. He's obvious move, and the older generation followed suit to match the two young people.Teacher Lu and his wife loved Jiang Hao more and more, so they wanted to take him out for a stroll after dinner.However, Jiang Yifeng was forced to spend time with Lu Jiawen alone in order to enhance their relationship.

From the perspective of their parents, they don't need to fall in love like young people at this age. If everyone's conditions are right and they feel suitable for each other, they can get married after spending a period of time together.After all, life is not for talking, but for living, and those love affairs will eventually become responsibilities and obligations.

"I also think that Jiawen is good. If we can make it with Xiao Jiang, soon, maybe Haohao will have a younger brother or younger sister by this time next year." Teacher Shen accompanied Ye Xiaoming back to the room, and she said it very happily at first, but Later, when I thought of my son like this, I felt sad for a while, and tears were about to fall again.

Seeing his mother like that, Ye Xiaoming knew what she was thinking, and he didn't comfort her, talking too much would only add to the sadness.He asked his mother to help him lie on the bed, and then said that he was going to sleep and asked her to go back to the room.

Under the dim light, loneliness invaded Ye Xiaoming's heart.He thought about the future, he thought about it when he decided to live, he knew that this was a long and lonely road, and there were countless hardships waiting for him on the road.It's not that he has never been afraid. He couldn't bear the thought of lying on the bed all day long with tubes inserted all over his body and hundreds of holes.Waiting for death is the most painful process. Only when the heart in the body stops beating, the imprisoned soul can be freed.And this waiting is destined to be something he can't get rid of.

When Jiang Yifeng entered the room, seeing that Ye Xiaoming was still asleep, he sat beside his bed, turned him over, and then gently rubbed the part that touched the bed just now.

"Yifeng, if I choose euthanasia in the future, will you help me?"

Jiang Yifeng thought for a while and said, "Yes. But you have no chance to make this choice."

"Why?" Ye Xiaoming turned to look at Jiang Yifeng.

"Because I'm here, you won't feel like you have nothing to love." Jiang Yifeng took it for granted.

Ye Xiaoming smiled, sighed and said: "You are so sweet-talking, it seems that taking down that Miss Lu is just around the corner."

"I will speak, and I will be willing to speak. You think whoever wants to hear can hear it."

"It's my honor."

"It's good to know." Jiang Yifeng changed Ye Xiaoming's posture again, "That Lu Jiawen is nice, but we are not suitable. My mother is always willing to come, and she doesn't think about my happiness in the rest of my life, alas."

"She did this just because of you. Don't know the blessings in the blessings."

"At this age, I don't know what kind of person I should look for. Forget it, if you don't talk about it, it will be annoying."

Jiang Yifeng chatted with Ye Xiaoming until he massaged his whole body before going to pack up and get ready for bed.

After Jiang Yifeng turned off the light and went to bed, Ye Xiaoming thought for a while and said, "You don't need to turn me over at night, I'll be fine all night."

"I've set a schedule, I'll get up, you go to sleep, don't worry about me."

In the darkness, apart from the breathing of the two people, the sound of the wind in the mountains could be faintly heard.The kiss in the afternoon, between the two men, was a bit weird, but it was the result of love.The two hearts collided instantly, throbbing in shock.Inexplicable emotions flowed between the two, and no one mentioned it again, but that kiss was deeply imprinted in each other's hearts.