Darkest Action

Cult Little Theater

(One)

[Dragon Boat Festival ultimate mourning cult, invincible new wall, Yi x Lan]

On the Dragon Boat Festival, Xiao Qiyi ate a magical rice dumpling, and an accidental mutation occurred. His body suddenly grew to be 20 years old, and his appearance was no different from Feng Ye when he was 20 years old...

Qi Yi ran to the city to find Anshen, and Anshen was stunned when he saw his childhood friend reappeared Σ(°△°|||)︴

An Shen: You... what the hell are you?Are you back in your 20s?

Qi Yi: Little mother, I am Xiao Yi.

Anshen: Are you shameless enough to pretend to be your own son?

Qi Yi: I'm really your godson, you took me on a rocking car yesterday.

An Shen: ... Are you really a kiwi fruit?

Qi Yi told the truth about his sudden growth, and then threw himself into Anshen's arms: Hug, little mother!

An Shen pushed Qi Yi away: You have grown up, you can't do this!

Qi Yi: Why?You hugged me yesterday!

Anshen: You are an adult now, and an adult does not need someone to hug him.

Qi Yi: All right.

Qi Yi clamored for Anshen to take him to the playground. When he arrived at the playground, Qi Yi wanted to ride a rocking car and was expelled by the staff.Anshen, who was going to buy snacks, quickly stuffed the marshmallows and Coke into the giant baby's hands and pulled them away.

Qi Yi saw the kisses and hugs between lovers, so he also learned how to hug Anshen, and kissed his face.

An Shen: ... What are you doing?Didn't I say adults can't kiss or hug anymore?

Qi Yi: You lied to me!You see they all kissed and hugged, I want to kiss and hug you too!

An Shen: If you do this again, I will beat you up.

Qi Yi: ...You don't love Xiao Yi anymore!

At this time, a large group of people gathered in the middle of the playground, and Anshen took Qi Yi to watch in order to distract him, but unexpectedly, someone proposed marriage...

Anshen: Let's go, there's nothing to see!

Qi Yi: Don't go!I love watching this, I'm going to learn how to propose!

Qi Yi watched the whole proposal carefully, took off the tab of the can, and handed it to Anshen.

Qi Yi: Little mother, you marry Xiao Yi!

An Shen: ...Don't talk nonsense!Am I in debt to your family named Qi?

Qi Yi: Did my dad make you unhappy when he was young?

Anshen: ... not only when I was young.

Qi Yi: Then from now on, I will compensate you on his behalf.I will take care of you for the rest of my life??!

Anshen: ... Guoguo!You can't mess up your seniority, your father and uncle and I have been 'good friends'...

Qi Yi: I don't care about them!No matter how rich or poor, I will marry you!

Anshen: ...

Qi Yi suddenly cupped Anshen's face and kissed it on his lips.

Anshen was stunned, her heart beat faster, bang bang bang.

Fireworks ignited behind me, music played~

(two)

【Feng X Lan】

As the sun went down, Anshen was held by the mutated 20-year-old Xiao Qiyi and walked out of the playground, only to find that Master Feng's car was already waiting outside the park.Master Feng saw his son who had grown up suddenly holding his own Bai Yueguang, and immediately ordered Wu Xia.

Master Feng: Wu Xia, take Xiao Yi to the hospital.

Qi Yi: I won't go, I won't go! !I want to be with my little mother! !

Master Feng: Shut up!

Qi Yi: ...

Master Feng to Anshen: Your son has mutated, and you are still going crazy with him?Anshen: I also don't want to see his current face, let's shrink him quickly.

Qi Yi: Little mother, I don't want to be separated from you.Xiao Yi just proposed to you...

Master Feng: Nonsense!Wu Xia, take Qi Yi away immediately!

Just as Qi Yi was about to grin and cry, Master Feng slapped his head. Qi Yi forcefully suppressed his tears, and followed Wu Xia away with a mournful face.

Anshen was about to drive away, Master Feng sat up after him, begging for a ride.

Master Feng: That kid...has he harassed you?

Anshen: Oh, what do you think?

Master Feng saw that Anshen was wearing a pull-tab on his ring finger, and immediately helped him take it off and threw it away.

Master Feng: You bastard!He's trying to mess with sex, I'll beat him to death when I get back!

Anshen: Like a father, like a son.

Master Feng: Then did he... touch you?

Anshen: ...No comment.

Master Feng: Damn it!He won't really kiss you, will he?

Anshen: ...

Master Feng: I didn't expect you to covet me so much when I was young. If I knew I should have snatched you over.

Anshen: Get out!

Master Feng suddenly lifted Anshen's chin, pressed it up and kissed it, and disinfected it carefully.

Master Feng: This is the original version, I can't mess around with that kid again.

After being kissed by Xiao Qiyi forcibly, Anshen was stunned again, his heart beat faster, pounding.

(three)

【Cult Father's Day, Feng X Lan?】

On Father's Day, Master Feng led Xiao Qiyi to the market to tease and soothe the nerves.

When he arrived at the office, Xiao Qiyi saw Anshen, so he ran with his chubby legs, hugged his legs and called out: "Little mother, little mother!"It's the holidays!

Anshen: ...What kind of festival do you celebrate?Father's Day?

Master Feng: Don't pay attention to these details, anyway, you are both a father and a mother.

Xiao Qiyi: Hug!little mom hugs...

Calming down helplessly, he picked up the baby.

Master Feng: Son, what did I teach you just now?What else do you have to tell your little mother?

Xiao Qiyi's chubby lotus root shape hugged Anshen's neck: Piao Piao!The little mother wants to give Xiaoyi a ticket

Anshen: ...

Master Feng: ...

Anshen: Can WeChat transfer work?

Master Feng: Uh... If I say that what I taught him is not this sentence, would you believe it or not?

Anshen: Hehe.Stop talking nonsense, I will transfer you a thousand.

Master Feng: Kiwi fruit!What did I just tell you? !

Xiao Qiyi: ...

An Shen felt sorry for the little baby, Master Cho Feng: Don't beat him!

Master Feng: ...I can't educate my children anymore, can I?

Xiao Qiyi was crying and crying: Xiao Yi is... the little baby of father and mother, from now on, we will spend every... every festival together, love each other, don't quarrel...

Anshen vs. Master Feng: ...Can you not teach him these provocative words?

Master Feng: All I taught him is Happy Father's Day!

(four)

[Sword Candy Theater? Meng X Feng]

The organizer of the idol talent show held a variety show road show, and invited the top 10 popular contestants in the original competition to the scene.

One of the links is that fans from various companies present flowers to their idols, and the artist who gets the most flowers can sign a movie invested by the organizer on the spot.

Ju Meng, who was sitting in the audience, told Du Gang: You go, arrange to set up checkpoints, and no other vehicles are allowed to enter except the designated flower transport vehicles.

Du Xiaomi went to make arrangements quickly, and in the end, only a few large carts of flowers for Feng Shao were successfully transported to the road show site...

Feng Shao became the winner of this link, successfully signed the contract, and the fans were jubilant.The host asked Feng Shao how to repay such generous fans, and Feng Shao blew kisses in the direction of Meng Ju.

Young Master Feng: I will agree to whatever request he has.

The host was doing something, and asked Meng Ju in the audience if he had any requirements for idols?

Meng Ju: I hope he can come to accompany me tonight...

Meng Ju's words caused screams at the scene, and Feng Shao responded from the air on the stage.

Young Master Feng: All right, no problem!

Meng Ju: Not only tonight, but also tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, can you come and accompany me?

On the stage, Feng seldom smiled but did not answer.

The dream is over.

Meng Ju was awakened by the overwhelming shouts of fans in the auditorium, and found that Feng Shao was the only one who was absent from the top 10 most popular idols at the time. Nine people on the stage were singing a song in memory of him together, and the screen was playing Feng Shao's life. photos and videos.

Bureau Meng: ...

Now comes the actual flower presentation.

Director Meng saw a boy on the stage wearing the same M-button jacket. After Du Xiaomi's popularization, he learned that this boy was a friend Feng Shao met during the draft, and the two won the championship and runner-up together.In a magazine interview, Feng Shao once revealed that the boy gave him a lot of advice in the early days of the establishment of the M brand.

Bureau Meng: You go, arrange to set up checkpoints. Except for the designated flower transport vehicles, no other vehicles are allowed to enter.

The several carts of flowers arranged by Bureau Meng were all given to Young Master Feng's friends, and the boy successfully signed the contract, and he blew a kiss in Bureau Meng's direction.The host made trouble and asked Bureau Meng how he felt?

Meng Ju: Thank you for being kind to my brother.

Everyone was at a loss.After Meng Ju finished speaking, he got up and left the road show.

(Fives)

[Cult's Story of Bringing a Baby?? Feng X Lan]

Anshen held a meeting all night in Master Feng's work room, woke up from the sofa in a daze in the morning, and found a ball-shaped object pressed on his chest, and stared at it, it was Qi Yi's baby

An Shen: Qi Feng!Take your son away!

Master Feng looked up from the table: Don't be so stingy, the baby likes you so he clings to you~

Xiao Qiyi woke up, chubby hand groped Anshen's chest, begging for milk.

Xiao Qiyi: Ma... Pony Ma, Xiao Yi is hungry...

An Shen: ...Go away, I don't have that thing! (Turning to Qi Feng) If you don't take this little rascal away, I'll beat him up!

Master Feng came and lifted the baby from Anshen's chest, and the baby immediately burst into tears.Anshen saw the baby being picked up like a chicken cub, and felt compassion...

Anshen: Hello!How do you hold a baby?His neck will be broken by you!

Xiao Qiyi's lotus-shaped forearms and legs waved and kicked wildly.

Xiao Qiyi: Little pony!Ahhh, I want a hug from a pony!

Master Feng: Are you finished?Didn't you ask me to take my son away?

Anshen: Give me the child!Go to your powdered milk!

Anshen hugged the little baby back, but had no choice but to coax her...

Anshen: Alright, alright, kiwis don't cry, kiwis don't cry... I'll beat you if you cry again...

Master Feng: ...Is that how you nicknamed my son?

Anshen: Shut up, hurry up and make your milk powder!

After Master Feng finished formulating the milk powder, he picked up the bottle and was about to stuff it into the baby's mouth...

Anshen: Stop it, give it to me!

Anshen took the bottle and tested the temperature of the milk before giving it to the baby.Xiao Qiyi drank milk in Anshen's arms, and quickly calmed down.

Master Feng: Don't say it, Lan Lan, you are worthy of being a little mother, and kiwi fruit looks a lot like you!

Anshen: ...your whole family is kiwifruit!

It was rare for Master Feng not to lift his shoulders, he looked at the two babies and smiled without saying a word.

(six)

【Cult Meng X Feng】

When he was in college, Xiao Meng was always in the bar.Mr. Meng felt that Feng was not fair, so he raised the wine bottle and gave the scumbag a hard lesson.

A week later, the scumbag drove to school...

Mr. Meng: There is roll call in class tomorrow, why are you going out?

Young Master Feng: Be good!Shout out to me!

Mr. Meng: I won't shout, you are not allowed to go out!

Feng Shao: He took me to Hong Kong for two days, and I will bring you a gift.

Mr. Meng: I don't want his things, you are not allowed to go.

Outside the school gate, the car whistled to remind him, Feng Shao ignored Mr. Meng and wanted to go out, but was grabbed again.

Young Master Feng: Are you crazy? Are you?Where do I go, do you want to take care of me?

Mr. Meng: I'm in charge of it to the end!

Mr. Meng held Feng Shao's face, put his arms around his waist, and kissed his lips heavily...

Outside the door, seeing this, the scumbag knew that he couldn't beat Boss Meng, so he drove away angrily.Feng Shao pushed Mr. Meng away.

Young Master Feng: You are fucking sick!People are scared away by you!

Mr. Meng: Don't get in touch with that kind of scum, he is not a good person.

Feng Shao: You pretend that I don't know, I just want to take this opportunity to make a fortune from him, and then kick him away!

Mr. Meng: Uh... so you know he's messing around outside?

Feng Shao flicked Boss Meng's forehead and rubbed his mouth.

Feng Shao: You kissed wrongly, too hard and lack of tenderness.If you don't practice, you won't be able to attract men in the future.

Mr. Meng: ...Go to hell!I don't need you to worry about it!

Feng Shao suddenly hugged Mr. Meng, and gave him a wet kiss tenderly.

Feng Shao: It must be this feeling, think about it yourself.

Boss Meng blushes: ...my future husband will be jealous...

Young Master Feng: Please, I am training you for him.If you want to be jealous, eat enough!

Feng Shao picked up Mr. Meng's chin, kissed it, and taught him again seriously.

(Seven)

[Cult? Rui X Lan, Feng X Lan]

When the little political commissar made a wish on his birthday, the little political commissar interlocked their fingers.

Small political commissar: I hope that Lanlan and I can stay together forever and never separate when we grow up.

Xiao Anshen: Oh, it won't work if you say it!

Master Feng: This wish is not very reliable, it is better to say it.

Small political commissar: ...

Xiao Anshen: ...

After eating, the two little ones held hands and wanted to escape, but Master Feng stopped him.

Master Feng: Hey, where are you two going? .

Small political commissar: You go first, I want to send Lanlan back.

Master Feng: Are you going to rent a room?

Small political commissar: ...

Xiao Anshen: ...

Master Feng: Don't go, come home with me!

Xiao Anshen: We are going to help each other with homework!

Master Feng: Oh, really?Then go together and I watch you two coach each other.

Xiao Anshen clenched his fist: Xiao Rui!Say something, do you want me or your brother?

Little political commissar to Master Feng: Brother, you go back.I promised Lan Lan that I would accompany him tonight.

Master Feng: Must we go?

Small Political Commissar: Well, it’s settled.

Master Feng took out a bottle of KY lubricant and handed it to the little political commissar.

Master Feng: Go, go, I can't control you!Use this, don't hurt him!

Small political commissar: ...

Xiao Anshen: ...

Small political commissar: No need, my skills are very good.

Master Feng: ...Take it!Get out!

Master Feng forcibly stuffed KY liquid into the little political commissar, and kicked the little couple out of the restaurant.

(Eight)

[Cult? Feng X Lan]

Anshen is in Master Feng's working cabin.After an unknown amount of time, he suddenly felt being lifted up, Anshen suddenly opened his eyes and found that Master Feng was carrying him to the bedroom.

Anshen: Bastard!What are you doing?

Master Feng: Go and sleep together on my bed.

Anshen: Get out!Let go, let me down!

Master Feng: If you move again, I'll kiss you.

An Shen: ... Are you still shameless?

Master Feng: I'm sorry, I wasn't born with it.

An Shen: ... I already have someone!

Master Feng: When Xiao He comes back, I will raise you two together.

Anshen: ... Your fucking views have exploded!

Master Feng: Be polite, be polite, never give up, and make persistent efforts.

Master Feng carried Anshen to the bedroom, and Xiao Qiyi lay on the bed waving his lotus-shaped hands, shouting in a daze.

Xiao Qiyi: Little mother... Xiao Yi wants little mother...

Master Feng hugged Anshen to Qi Yi's side and put him down.

Master Feng: What are you thinking, I want you to sleep with my son.

Xiao Qiyi felt that someone was on the bed, rolled into Anshen's arms, and hugged him with his small hands.Anshen froze for a moment, and was unexpectedly kissed by Master Feng on the forehead.

Master Feng: Ah!Not sure, I want to kiss my son!sorry!

An Shen: Get out!

Anshen hugged Xiao Qiyi back and patted him gently to coax him.Master Feng looked at the two babies, kissed Qi Yi's little cheek again, turned off the lights and closed the door, and left the bedroom.

(nine)

【Feng X Lan Cult】

Master Feng took care of the baby alone at the hut near No. 83 on weekends.Master Feng remained indifferent, and continued to exchange information with Anshen.

Anshen: Hey!Your son is crying.

Master Feng looked at the laptop screen: Oh, go and have a look.

An Shen: ...Go by yourself!

Master Feng: I don't know how to coax him, so let him stop making trouble after a while.

Anshen: Fuck!Can't coax, you can make it!

Anshen couldn't bear it anymore, went to the stroller to pick up the baby, and suddenly felt a chill in his arms...

An Shen: Qi Feng!How did you change your diaper? !It's all out of my hands!

Master Feng: Uh... No way... I'll go and get a piece right now, don't get angry.

Master Feng brought diapers and wanted to change them for his son, but Xiao Qiyi kicked up his two lotus-shaped calves, crying and refusing.

Master Feng: Lanlan, your hand is fast, why don't you come, it's easier than changing magazines.

Tranquilized and speechless, he helped Xiao Qiyi change his diaper.

Master Feng: Tsk tsk, look at this gesture, look at the silhouette of this diaper... You are simply a professional.

Anshen: Shut up!

Master Feng: Son, thank you soon, little mom!

Xiao Qiyi vaguely called to calm the nerves: Ma~ Ma Ma~~

An Shen: ...you also shut up!

Xiao Qiyi: ...

Master Feng looked at Anshen and his son: Oh~ With this pair of big and small babies, it's enough to die!

An Shen: One more word of nonsense, I will let you be enough now!

Master Feng: Okay, okay, I won't say anything.

Anshen: ...

(ten)

[Cult Carnival Small Theater Meng Ju X Anshen]

Background: The world is peaceful, and after conferring the gods, Anshen is transferred to the Ministry of Public Security.On this day, Anshen came back from Beijing and came to the Municipal Bureau to visit Meng Bureau.

Anshen took out the cigarette case?

Meng Ju: Hey, this is not quite right.

Anshen: All right, now the airs are getting bigger.

Just as Anshen was about to light his own cigarette, Ju Meng had already taken out the Givenchy lighter from back then and handed it over to him.

Meng Ju: For you, I can make an exception once.

Anshen lit a cigarette and asked: What, you and Chen Rui haven't reconciled yet?

Bureau Meng: Hurry up.

An Shen: I can warn you, if you want to treat him again...

Bureau Meng: Stop!It doesn't bother you to express your opinion.

Anshen: I want to have dinner with him tonight.

Bureau Meng: I will go too!

An Shen: He only dated me.

Bureau Meng: Damn!All right, then I'll call Mr. He over now, and let him have dinner with me too!

Anshen: Qiyan doesn't eat spicy food.

Bureau Meng failed to provoke: ...

Anshen: Chen Rui, I will help you persuade him.He still loves you, no problem.

Meng Ju: It's still righteous, so I won't tell Mr. He how many men and women you have been courting in Beijing.

An Shen: Oh, now you know how to threaten me.

Meng Ju sat next to Anshen and put his head on Anshen's shoulder.

Meng Ju: Master, I miss you so much.

Anshen rubbed Meng Ju's head: It seems that he hasn't grown up yet.

(eleven)

[The cult quickly took my brother away, Feng X Rui]

Master Xiaofeng took the 10-year-old political commissar out for camping, and after camping, he began to flirt with Xiao Zhengtai's younger brother.

Master Xiaofeng: Xiaorui, let's play toss, shall we?

Small political commissar: No, I don’t want to fall to the ground again.

Master Xiaofeng: ... Hehehe, last time it was a miss.Come here and give me a hug!

The little political commissar walked over obediently, and was violently jerked and hugged by Master Xiao Feng, who also rubbed his face frantically.

Little Political Commissar: Be more mature!

Master Xiaofeng: Ah!My brother is so handsome, follow me~

Small political commissar: ...

Master Xiaofeng: When you grow up, you will be fascinated by others. In the future, your wife will have to pick and choose!

Small political commissar: Can you stop rubbing your face, it hurts.

Master Xiaofeng: Last time I brought you to meet Sister Tingting, do you still like it?If you don't like it, brother will change it for her!

Little political commissar: Her dad is still the principal, don't change it, just bear with it and pass.

Master Xiaofeng: What are you talking about? I didn't fall in love with her because of who her father was.

Small political commissar: If not, then you can change, I think you are tired of being with her.

Master Xiaofeng hugged the little political commissar and gave a poke.

Master Xiaofeng: Why is my brother so sensible?Follow me too~

Small political commissar: ...

Master Xiaofeng: When you fall in love in the future, I will ask my brother to check for you!Remember not to look for one that is too far from our home.

Small Political Commissar: Why?

Lord Xiaofeng: Because we are so good, we exist like gods, mortals have to feel inferior when we are with us, and it is tiring to make them work hard, hahahaha!

Small political commissar: ...

Master Xiaofeng asked the little political commissar to sleep in a good position in the tent, hugged and patted him to sleep.

Little political commissar: I don’t need to be patted to sleep, I’m not a baby.

Master Xiaofeng: Talk too much!That's brother's love for you??!

Small political commissar: ...

Lord Xiaofeng: Xiaorui, we are a family!

Little Political Commissar: Good night, brother.Xiao Rui knows??