Mutants' Daily Life [Comprehensive British and American]

It's not my fault, it's all my dad's fault

In fact, what happened that night was just the beginning.

It didn't take long for Tony to realize how bad it was to 'bring kids', especially two kids with superpowers.

Carlos has a lot of requirements. The temperature of the bath water must be adjusted, not too hot or too cold, but not too hot; The toothpaste must be fruit-flavored, and strawberry tastes the best; when you wash your hair, you need someone to massage it, and it is best for the massager to have long, slender and beautiful fingers; the pattern on the towel should preferably be in line with his aesthetics.

And his damn, extra wings.

He asked Tony to wipe the feathers one by one with a wet towel. If there was a soft brush, it would be best to sweep away the dust in the crevices, or blow it gently...

However, Tony just wanted to grab his wings roughly, press him under the shower head of the bathroom like a chicken, and rinse it cleanly with warm water, and it's over!

But if he dared to do that, Carlos, a narrow-minded guy, would definitely take revenge on him for the rest of his life.

In addition to the problem of washing, what to eat has also become a big problem.

Carlos is picky eater, even if he ordered a takeaway...for example, pizza, he wanted to eat pizza that tasted like onions but didn't have onions.

"I really want to smear your face with onions! How can you have the face to make such a request?"

Tony gritted his teeth and said each word, but still holding the fork with a broken face, patiently picking out the onions one by one.

Every time he picked a piece, he murmured: "Carlos, you have to cherish your present time. Because only children have the right to be willful. If you are an adult...if you are an adult..."

He gritted his teeth and didn't continue to say the following words, maybe... the scruples were too bloody and not suitable for children?

Carlos ignored him.

He was busy complaining to Kurt about the lack of desserts, which were not as delicious as those made by Mrs. Maria.

Tony wanted to kill him so much.

God knows, how long has it been since Mrs. Maria made dessert for her son...

In comparison, Kurt the Nightcrawler looks evil in appearance, but he is an existence comparable to an angel.

Wear whatever you give him, and eat whatever you feed him.

Never fussy, not noisy, just stay in one place quietly.

Except for the occasional babbling of prayers and the spread of "superstition" ideas about "God, God", he is simply the best child in the world.

However, the best child in the world listens to the words of "the worst child in the world".

And his teleportation ability made Carlos even more powerful.

Whenever Tony is really annoyed and wants to ignore them, hide in the underground laboratory with excellent security measures and equipped with fingerprint code locks, and be completely quiet, it only takes three seconds for the two children to instantly Moved to catch up, sat on his experimental table and had a tea party.

After enduring it for two days and one night.

No... Actually, Tony felt like it had been a long year.

"A good boy should not play truant or play truant..."

He said to the two of them righteously: "I will send you two back to X Academy tomorrow."

Carlos looked unhappy.

He raised his chin slightly, turned his head, and said to Kurt vividly: "You know, Kurt? Tony's tone is the same as my mother. Every time my mother wants to date her lover, she sends me away. , would also tell me like 'Carlos, let your brother teach you archery, a good boy should learn more'."

Kurt shook his tail and asked curiously, "Archery, Carlos, do you know how to shoot?"

"Of course, on Mount Olympus, my brother's arrow skills are also well-known. And I was taught by him."

Carlos proudly showed off and said: "Apollo used to laugh at my brother's small bow and arrow, not like a warrior, but it turns out that he was the one who was punished in the end."

Kurt couldn't understand.

But he has one advantage, that is, no matter what Carlos says, he can maintain the admiring eyes that although he doesn't understand, but you are so amazing', which greatly satisfies the other party's self-confidence.

"Speaking of bows and arrows, do you know how to choose a good bow?"

Under Kurt's adoring eyes, Carlos couldn't help but started teaching the bow and arrow class.

In the end, he was so happy that he even stretched out his hand rarely, and grabbed his exclusive weapon from a different space, a small golden bow carved with patterns of pomegranate flowers and grape vines, and generously allowed Kurt to touch it. a touch.

As he touched it, Kurt said enviously, "That's great, I also want a weapon that can appear when I want, disappear when I want, and can be carried with me."

"Probably not."

Carlos said proudly and ostentatiously: "This is the privilege of the gods. Weapons are an important part of the gods. After using them for a long time, they are like their own bodies. Once they are lost, their strength will be reduced by at least half. In the past, the stupid big man in Northern Europe A Thor, someone once stole a hammer... Yes, you heard me right, it’s a hammer, this weapon is weird and ugly, right? There’s no way, the gods in Northern Europe are not serious.”

He casually slandered other gods, and continued: "The ugly guy who stole Thor's hammer is a giant, so it doesn't matter if he is ugly, and he used it as a threat to marry a beautiful Norse goddess Fleur. elegant."

"This is wrong. How can you force others to marry you?"

Kurt was fascinated by what he heard, and asked anxiously, "What's next? Did the thief succeed?"

"No." Carlos directly spoiled.

He went on to talk about the process: "The Nordic evil god Loki came up with a great idea. He asked Thor to wear the dress of the goddess Freya, put on Freya's necklace, use magic to change his appearance slightly, and then put on Thick veil, pretending to be Freya, to trick that thief."

When talking about this, he simply commented: "I think Loki is really a rare smart god in Northern Europe. Although he is a bit bad and loves to play pranks, he is at least a reliable god. That stupid big Sol No, he doesn't have the consciousness of "Loki is racking his brains for his lost hammer". He knows that he is pretending to be the goddess Freya, but at the thief's "marrying the bride" dinner, he eats boldly. A cow, eight big salmon, and three big barrels of mead, and nearly leaked."

Carlos's expression was really hard to express. He said with disgust and admiration: "I really doubt whether the gods in Northern Europe can't get enough to eat every day, the eldest son of the king of gods, so... informal, eat After so much, it made people speechless. So, the thief was stunned on the spot! I guess I have never seen such an edible goddess... Fortunately, there was the most deceitful Loki at the scene. He ran over and explained with smooth words , saying that it was because the bride was too anxious to come over to get married, so she hurried on the road for eight days and didn't have time to eat..."

"Haven't eaten for eight days?" Kurt repeated in surprise.

Then, he said innocently and innocently: "Then it's no wonder I have to eat so much."

Carlos glanced at him, once again feeling superior in IQ.

He continued speechlessly: "Yes, that thief is the same as you, he believed it. Later, under Loki's coaxing, he took out the stolen hammer on the wedding night and gave it to the bride as a token of 'love'. And his fake bride, Thor, the owner of the hammer, tore off the skirt and exploded on the spot, blasting his house into ruins."

"It's amazing!" The best audience, Kurt, applauded at the right time and gave a great response.

Prior to this, his facial expression had been constantly changing with the development of the storyline.

This time, too, he said with joy and longing on his face, "If only I could be as powerful as Thor."

Carlos was shocked: "Why do you think that? He's so stupid!"

Kurt froze for a moment: "Uh, isn't this story about Thor being brave and resourceful, with the help of Loki, recovering the hammer and defeating the bad guys?"

"What are you kidding!"

Carlos patted the table and stood up, put up two fingers, and said righteously: "This story clearly tells us three things. First, you can't believe a word of what Loki said. It’s the same; second, Thor is a fool who can only use force! Third, the Norse gods are not as powerful as the Greek gods!”

"..." Kurt looked blank.

Carlos turned his head angrily: "Tony, tell me, am I right?"

Tony put his hands on his forehead tiredly.

He just watched helplessly as the topic wandered thousands of miles away, and was still running wildly, unable to come back at all...

"Don't ask me, I'm not interested in the myths and stories you made up. Remember, I'm an adult, and adults are too old to believe in myths and legends." He replied in a weak tone.

Then, ignoring Carlos shouting angrily, "I'm not lying, my brother told me what really happened", he turned around and took a bottle of beer from the refrigerator beside him, bit it open with his teeth, and pointed at the bottle. I took a sip.

"I don't understand what the children are thinking. The fantasy world in their little heads is really colorful, but I am really not interested in this. Do you know? These days, I should have been at night with a Two beautiful girls had an exciting and exciting time together. But now, I can only stay at home like a dad, listening to two children tell their fantasy fairy tales, and my spirit has been hit hard. So, Please, please give me a little quiet time to grieve..."

While muttering slowly, he lazily lay half on the sofa, pondering in a daze: "It seems that this attempt with a child has made me reconfirmed that my dad and I are actually the same." '

Like a drunkard, he took several sips of wine in a row, looked at the ceiling and said to himself: "...It can be seen that this is not my problem, it is my father's problem. I am his son, we are born similar We are not suitable for raising children. This is written in our genes and cannot be changed. Yes, that’s right, that’s it, it’s not my fault, it’s all my dad’s fault..."