a quarter of his

Lin Jingfan hasn't been on blued for a long, long time. He thought that the mentality of "None" has improved a lot, but he didn't expect to be a little bit repetitive.

He scrolled down a little nervously, and found that in the latest news of "None", almost all of them mentioned a leading actor.

For example, this article on May 5:

-He moved to live in my house, he was very happy, but he was afraid that he could not control his emotions and scare him.

February 5:

I only talked to him less than ten words today, I hate all the people who chat with him, it's very annoying.

February 5:

-How can he chat with anyone? Is there anyone in this world who doesn't like him?

February 4:

- It's boring to be a human being, but it's interesting to be with him, why is he so nice to everyone?

February 4:

- The world doesn't seem so bad anymore.

February 4:

-I like someone, but I dare not tell him.

Brother "None" actually has someone he likes, Lin Jingfan is happy for him, but at the same time can't help being a little worried.

What if the other party is not interested in him at all?What if the other party has a bad attitude?What if the other party rejects him?

Lin Jingfan feels that Brother "None" is in a state where he can't bear any stimulation and setbacks. He urgently needs a success to build up his self-confidence that is about to collapse.If someone makes up a knife at this time, I really don't know what the consequences will be.

However, it is difficult for relatives and friends to intervene in emotional matters, and Lin Jingfan is helpless.

I can only chat with him more and see how his mental state is.

He was about to exit the news page, clicked on the dialog box with "None", and suddenly saw another news immediately below the news on April 4:

Hope emerges from despair, sees light from hell.

It was a post posted in early April, with a picture under the text - a Starbucks bag lying on the table, and a copy of "No Place in the World" halfway out of the bag.

In the blink of an eye, Lin Jingfan suddenly thought of something, and he turned his gaze to the dining table in shock.

During the days when Zhou Hao was sick and hospitalized, he had seen a bag exactly like the one in the picture on the dining table, and what was contained in that bag was also a copy of Dazai Osamu's "No Man in the World".

Lin Jingfan unbelievably flipped through the dynamics in blued from the beginning.

On April 4th, he joined ET on this day, and it was also the day "None" ended his countdown to suicide.

On April 4, he broke up with Xu Chen in mid-April, and then he seemed to have a long talk with "None" all night.

On May 5th, Lin Jingfan looked through the chat records between himself and Zhou Hao, and found that Zhou Hao was sick and hospitalized that day, and he went to see him by himself.

On May 5nd, on Saturday, Lin Jingfan went out to play Werewolf with his friends. Zhou Hao called him once, and seemed a little angry. Lin Jingfan was afraid of making trouble, so he postponed moving in for a day.

The latest one, June 6th, is Zhou Hao's birthday.Lin Jingfan specially helped him organize a birthday surprise, Zhou Hao's reaction was very stiff, Lin Jingfan thought he didn't like to celebrate his birthday in public.The two went home together, Lin Jingfan unintentionally put his arms around Zhou Hao's shoulders, but he pushed him away violently.

That night, Zhou Hao's mood was always very low, sitting alone on the sofa for a long time, Lin Jingfan thought he was angry.

All the plot points matched up so miraculously that Lin Jingfan was about to suspect that he was suffering from paranoia.

Is Zhou Hao "None"?

Lin Jingfan did not believe such a coincidence at all.

Zhou Hao likes me?

Lin Jingfan's eyes fell on Zhou Hao who was sitting on the sofa watching TV intently.

Everything seems to be the same as usual, and everything seems to have changed.

Lin Jingfan returned to the room in a daze, and collapsed on the bed.

He didn't sleep well that night, he had nightmares one after another, and when he got up to work the next day, he felt like he was going to be useless.

After the meeting in the morning, he sat at his desk, habitually opened the chat box with Zhou Hao, asked Zhou Hao what he had for dinner, and suddenly stopped in the middle of typing.

The chat history on the OA interface stayed at last night. He asked Zhou Hao if it was okay to eat Kung Pao Chicken tomorrow, and Zhou Hao said it was fine.

Scroll up again.

He asked Zhou Hao what is the implementation method of a certain function in the requirements document, and Zhou Hao sent him a long paragraph of explanation.

Further up.

He asked Zhou Hao if he wanted to work overtime at night, Zhou Hao asked you, he said yes, Zhou Hao said yes.

Lin Jingfan was shocked to find that Zhou Hao never seemed to miss any of his messages, nor would he refuse any of his requests.

He seemed to treat him really differently than others.

When Lin Jingfan first joined the company, he heard from his brother and sister in the team that Zhou Hao was very capable in business, but difficult to get along with.I have always been a loner, and I hardly have any communication with others outside of work.

But from the day Lin Jingfan joined the job, Zhou Hao would have lunch with him every day, and after moving in, the two even ate three meals a day together.

They work together and work overtime together.Zhou Hao never ordered milk tea with his colleagues, but as long as Lin Jingfan invited him, he would order it.

Lin Jingfan was the first person to look for when he was sick, and he was unwilling to charge him more rent. When Sister Wang gave him small shoes, she would hate Sister Wang to help him vent her anger.

Everything points to a unique possibility, Lin Jingfan can't help but not believe it.

Zhou Hao likes him.

The first reaction in Lin Jingfan's mind was that he must not be rejected.

But what to do after this, what to do, he is really at a loss.

Continue to get along as before?

Lin Jingfan asked himself that he couldn't do it, but he was really not ready to break the relationship.

What was even more difficult was that he hadn't thought through how to deal with Zhou Hao's feelings at all.

Forget it or not, the boat was naturally straight when it reached the bridge, and Lin Jingfan felt his head was going to explode.

In their senior year, the college did not arrange courses for them, and all the credits of professional courses have been completed.If you fail a course, you can follow the juniors and younger sisters to take make-up exams and retake according to the situation.

The rest of the students only have two things to do in this year: [-]. Find a job; [-]. Graduation project.

The graduation project will not start until the end of the semester, so finding a job has become a top priority.Except for those who have already taken the postgraduate entrance examination, or are determined to take the postgraduate entrance examination, almost all the prospective graduates have poured into the melting pot of autumn recruits, and have been tempered by the interviewers.

At this time, the advantages of finding an internship early will be reflected.

Xiang Tian, ​​Zhang Zhao, Zhuang Mengyuan, and several friends including Lin Jingfan have already settled down. When the army of job seekers is pouring out, when the sea submits their resumes, they have nothing to do, and they are already bored. up.

Xiang Tian and Zhuang Mengyuan were recommended to Zhejiang University and the Computer Science Department of Shanghai University respectively. They went to summer camps during their summer vacation, and they had already been appointed by their tutors in advance.

Zhang Zhao was originally going to recommend graduate students in the school, but because of some changes in his family, he urgently needed money, so he chose to work. He has signed a two-party agreement with Huawei, planning to continue his internship before graduation and earn an internship salary.

Although Lin Jingfan is the worst among his friends, he still has a good place to go. In his senior year, he decided to continue his internship at ET, firstly to learn more things, and secondly to earn some money to spend.

However, the other two in the dormitory were not as expected.

Zhou Xiang finally ended his life of "lying down" and began to "sitting" thinking about life.He is still a little uncertain about the future. He wants to take the postgraduate entrance examination but always has no courage to study. He wants to find a job to save a way out, but he is always tied up in the postgraduate entrance examination and cannot let go.

Xu Zequn, on the other hand, looked like a dead pig who was not afraid of boiling water. After Hai submitted a batch of resumes, he continued to lie down on the bed.

"Why don't you choose a position first?" Lin Jingfan finally couldn't help it one day, "Do you want to do development?"

"I don't want to," Zhou Xiang shook his head.

"I can't even write code," Xu Zequn said lazily with a sigh.

"Then why don't you try to vote for the test," Lin Jingfan said, "I've done this for a while, it's quite simple, and the requirements for freshmen are not very strict, just learn about the black box and white box, and learn about the test How to write use cases should be almost required by many companies.”

"Well, I'd better take the postgraduate entrance examination," Zhou Xiang said, "Your sister-in-law is also going to take the postgraduate entrance examination recently, let me take the examination with her."

"Oh, I really want to go," Xu Zequn said, "but I can't even pass the initial screening of my resume. What can I do?"

"How is it possible?" Lin Jingfan frowned, "You are a 985 school, and your resume is impossible. How did you write your resume? I'll help you correct it."

Lin Jingfan asked for Xu Zequn's resume, spent an hour to help him correct it, and helped him apply for a few companies that he thought were good.

In the past few days, he has been observing Zhou Hao intentionally or unintentionally, and the more he observes, the more he is sure that he should be "None".

One day he had a whim to invite Zhou Hao to watch a movie, which was recommended to him by Xu Chen before, called "The Imitation Game".

This is a film about Turing's biography, the plot is very exciting and fascinating.

The first half has been talking about how Turing worked hard to help the Allied forces create a machine that cracked the German code, and the second half began to slowly reveal Turing's emotional world and homosexual identity.

At the end of the movie, Turing finally cracked the German code, but was forced to undergo treatment and chemical castration because of his homosexuality, and eventually committed suicide.

When watching the ending, Lin Jingfan felt an unspeakable sadness.Although that cruel era has passed, he, who has the same sexual orientation, had a complete sympathy with Turing in the film at that moment, as if he was the one who was treated like that, which put a heavy pressure on his heart and sad.

He sneaked a glance at Zhou Hao, and found that his face was not good-looking, and secretly sighed that he had chosen a bad movie.

That night Lin Jingfan lay on the bed tossing and turning, unable to sleep, thinking of Turing's tragic ending, his own bleak future, and Zhou Hao.

He suddenly remembered something, picked up his phone and clicked into blued, and sure enough, he saw a post from "None" more than ten minutes ago.

January 9:

-He invited me to watch a movie with him, it ended badly, is homosexuality really a crime?What is he trying to tell me through this movie?

Lin Jingfan's heart sank. As soon as this post was posted, it completely shattered his last trace of fantasy, proving that "None" is Zhou Hao, and Zhou Hao is "None".

Lin Jingfan didn't feel at ease and the joy of being liked, he didn't expect Zhou Hao to be so pessimistic and sensitive, so sensitive that he would doubt his intentions just after watching a movie.

Could he have some psychological problems?depression?Bipolar disorder?

Lin Jingfan can no longer simply understand his performance as low EQ or being out of gregarious.

He turned over irritably, only feeling one head and two big ones.

Forget it, let's sleep, let's go to work tomorrow, let's talk about it after waking up.

The author has something to say: I still love you today.