Confessions of S

The author has something to say: After turning over and rewriting, it is only a little bit like what I want them to discuss.I admit that I have sold a value in this paragraph, and the writing is self-conscious and obscure. . . .Although I've tried to make it easier to understand. . .But I want them to explore this here anyway.

It's raining.

Perfect night.The breath of summer is so thick that people can't help sticking out the tip of their tongues to appreciate it.The black cat passed under the canopy that could block the rain, its red orange eyes flashed, and it saw the black-haired young man leaning crookedly on the terrace, the back legs of the chair were off the ground, and his cheeks were warmed by the rain. hot windows.The room behind the young man was dead silent, neither as if someone was in it at this time, nor as if someone had lived in it.

His eyes pass through the glass and the rain barrier, slantingly; the young man pokes his cheeks, and his breath covers the inside of the rain window with a white film.

The street lamps float up and down on the dark street, like a sea of ​​stars.

Will the supernova explode, will the sunlight fall, will the long-lasting Orion on the equator fall into the viscous and thick black sea waves one night, and rise in the morning light the next day?As if thinking about these questions, the young man was thoughtful, without squinting.Suddenly, he raised his hand.

Cover your eyes and ears, hug your whole head, shake your shoulders, and slowly squat down against the edge of the wall.

However, after only a moment, he opened his hand.

Lu Mucha spread his hands and leaned on the glass, hitting it lightly while laughing uncontrollably.

I can't cry, I've already reached this point... I can't cry.

He couldn't help laughing even harder.A crime like this will surely be punished——

He obviously didn't want him to die.

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24 hours ago.

It was dark, and it was light again, the man's body temperature dropped a little bit, Mu Cha handed him the cold towel, but the other party gave him a very nasty "tsk"; Mu Cha pushed the towel away with his bound hands together It was fun to watch, and I couldn't help laughing maliciously:

"You, like Larson."

Lu Wen didn't heal as fast as those protagonists in the Healing Articles, so he had to lie flat all the time, maintaining an annoying posture of bending over and looking up with Mu Cha.The knots on the wrists and ankles are only loosely tied now, but it's a pity that it's not very comfortable to tighten the chest and loosen it. Lu Wen doesn't have the energy to pay attention to the changes in the restraints on his body.

"Larson?" Unexpectedly by Mu Cha, Lu Wen immediately replied, "Larson the sea wolf?"

"Lu Wen, do you know?" Mu Cha was really shocked by Lu Wen's reaction, and hurriedly asked, "You actually know the sea wolf Larson?"

"Pfft." With a rather unfriendly exclamation, Lu Wen clenched his molars, "What are you pretending to be, didn't you let me 'know'?"

I call you... Mu Cha came to his senses.By the way, when I just kidnapped Lu Wen here, in order to cover up his voice, but mainly to torture him for fun, I would turn on the computer and play some audio versions of world literature classics for him when I went out every day— —I deliberately picked my favorite works, but were always complained by others that they were obscure... It must be interesting to see that illiterate man tied to a water pipe, miserable and forced to "appreciate" masterpieces.

"Did you hear that?"——Even though he remembered such a thing, Mu Cha still felt fresh.

"Ah?" Lu Wen was furious, "Is there any way I can't listen?"

That's not what it meant. Mu Cha lowered his head and looked seriously at the face of the man lying on his back: Did this guy listen?But Lu Wen didn't notice the surprise in the young man's eyes and tone at all. He closed his eyes seriously and recalled slowly. "The first article..." He frowned slightly.

Don't you understand... Unsurprisingly, Mu Cha nodded knowingly, it was Dazai Osamu's "Disqualification in the World"; but immediately after seeing the man's face dyed with brilliance, "I like the second article, tsk, Lal Sen is so handsome."

"Super handsome?" Mu Cha remained calm on the surface, but his heart was trembling with curiosity. He was cautious and coaxing like a toddler.

"Well, super handsome." Lu Wen replied, with a smile on the corner of his mouth, "He's handsome when he's sailing, he's handsome when he rides the equatorial current and trade winds, he's handsome when he's fighting, he's handsome when he's killing people, and he's also handsome when he's arguing with the protagonist. ..."

"Sea Wolf" is a work of realist writers in the early [-]th century in the United States. The work revolves around a writer who accidentally rescued a shipwreck by a seal hunting ship. The theme is sailing and adventure, but it is not a eulogy for life. , but full of uninhibited contempt and immoral debauchery.The captain of that ship, the sea wolf Larson, is a presence of strength and beauty, the embodiment of the strong and the victor, but he is a veritable "wolf".

What the book talks about is basically how sea wolves bully the writer, humiliate the writer, and force him to work for him; Discussion about human life.

Mu Cha felt that it felt like cutting a person's throat while covering the wound with his hands to save the other person's life-Sea Wolf's hands were covered with blood; when Lu Wen said that such a person was "handsome", Mu Cha Can't find it funny on its own.

"Handsome when arguing with the protagonist?" Mu Cha asked him, "You mean the sea wolf's value is 'handsome'?"

"Yes..." Lu Wen was not willing to imitate the tongue, "The value is handsome."

more interesting.The writer in the book affirms the value of man, and believes that after man exists, he will leave an eternal soul; while the sea wolf thinks that man is a thing similar to yeast—the most despicable and most despicable, wriggling mass; Life is a journey of devouring each other, the strong yeast wins, but that's all.

Some people say that the writer in this book is a metaphor for civilization, and the sea wolf represents barbarism. This book is about the conflict between civilization and barbarism, and civilization will eventually defeat barbarism. However——

"Lu Wen, you seem to think differently from the mainstream thinking." Mu Cha said.

"Mainstream thinking? Different?"

"Writer and sea wolf, you seem to agree with sea wolf's point of view more."

"Of course," Lu Wen replied without even thinking about it, and he was so decisive that he didn't get angry: "Isn't this the meaning of the author writing this book? To express the sea wolf's point of view?"

"'To express the sea wolf's point of view'?" Mu Cha laughed so hard, his jaw sank slightly, completely unaware that he had leaned forward forcefully again and again—the mainstream thinking thought that what this book wanted to express was "a writer how it overcame the idea of ​​a sea wolf". "Did the writer win at the end of the novel? Was it the writer who rode the trade winds and returned with the beauty? ... And he and the beauty also said this about the sea wolf:"

"'His power binds him no more'..."

"...'He is a free soul now'." Lu Wen continued the second half of the sentence in a muffled voice, his eyes full of dissatisfaction. "The sea wolf didn't lose, he just died." Said a little at a loss.

"According to his own point of view, isn't death a 'lose'? - because it was swallowed by other 'yeast'."

"..." Lu Wen couldn't answer, he was a little irritable - besides, he had to push Mu Cha, who was almost on his body (he was already lying on his back, there was no place to hide)... He was very depressed !Can't figure out why this guy who is usually at least (pretending to be) calm is smoking crazy today.

As for Mu Cha, despite thinking about it, he didn't discuss it with Lu Wen any further.In fact, he was very grateful that Lu Wen stopped holding on to the reason why he kept him here, and didn't ask him what he planned to do with him in the future... The peace in front of him was very cherished, and he didn't want to break it.

So he didn't intend to tell Lu Wen, he very much agreed with his idea: the sea wolf is very - "handsome".

Not only did Mu Cha agree with it, but he was almost 100% sure that the author, like them, was full of praise for the sea wolf—the enthusiasm of the sea wolf, the arbitrariness of the sea wolf, and the tyranny of the sea wolf—from the beginning to the end. Feet, from the beginning to the end, the author is not using the image of a perfect man as a metaphor, it is simply describing the most perfect man in his heart.

Lu Wen said that the author was expressing the "sea wolf's point of view", and the mainstream thought said that the focus of the novel was "civilization defeated barbarism". What I want to talk about is not the conflict between the two, civilization and barbarism at all, but the fusion of the two.

At the end of the novel, the tumor in Larson's brain develops.The writer handcuffed him to the bed, but it was unnecessary—he first lost sensation in his right hand, then the right half of his body, then his left hand, his left leg, and his left face.

"Are you in pain?"

"It doesn't hurt all the time." When they finally asked him this way, Sea Wolf, who had been unable to speak for a long time, wrote slowly and firmly with a pen.

"When I'm not in pain, I feel extremely calm and peaceful. I've never thought so clearly before... I can dissect life and death like an Indian sage."

"And the 'immortal soul'?"

"pull"

--pull.This is the last word of the sea wolf Larson's life.

The sea wolf should not have died like this—even though he had similar lamentations, Mu Cha appreciated the inescapable pain.Does it hurt?It doesn't hurt all the time.He read it over and over again, "You look like Larson"—that's why he teased Lu Wen like this; he didn't know how the writer looked at the sea wolf in the end, but he was as helpless as a trapped beast Looking up at Lu Wen, Mu Cha's heart was filled with strange emotions for an instant.

Now it doesn't look like a particularly good omen, because the sea wolf ends up dead.