if you serious you lose

It's not that Qin Jie has never thought about meeting Xiao Yun again. After all, most of his high school classmates are still in City S, and there are many old high school classmates in S University. The appearance of not marrying made Qin Jie feel that it was unlikely that the two would meet again in S City.

But life is always full of surprises. For Xiao Yun who seemed to fall from the sky, Qin Jie found that he really couldn't express the joy of reuniting with his old friend after a long absence, but after thinking about it a few more times, he no longer forced himself, because he remembered this man Not only an old friend, but also his ex-boyfriend.

That afternoon, Xiao Yun drank a lot of warm water in Qin Jie's office, but finally only waited for a depressing response.

"The opportunity you want is no longer possible. The fundamental reason is that I will never love you again, and I already have a lover. Xiao Yun, I can imagine the hardships you have gone through. If you really confirm that in the future If you don't understand your own sexuality, then please take your future lovers seriously and stop swaying, but for me, we are just a first love, and you are just an ordinary old classmate now."

After saying these words, Qin Jie and Xiao Yun sat quietly for a while, then, Qin Jie stood up and walked back to his office seat. Soon there were sounds of paper flipping and keyboards and mice interlacing in the office. It started one after another, and Xiao Yun didn't make a sound for a long time. At this moment, he seemed to be hit by the cold mechanical voice in his mind, playing back every word Qin Jie said.

"Xiaojie, no matter what you think, I am really happy to see you today."

Facing the computer, Qin Jie, who was unknowingly thrown into his work, was once again brought back to reality by Xiao Yun's sudden voice, and stopped his movements. Just as he was secretly worrying about how to deal with Xiao Yun , a sigh was heard.

"Hey, is this retribution? Now I fully understand how it feels to be left out by someone I care about."

What kind of person is Xiao Yun?Qin Jie thought about it hard, he must be the kind of person who is always held in the palm of his hand and surrounded by others. Even during the dark period of underground love, he never lacked choices around him, so for him Qin Jie found it unbelievable to have a homosexual relationship with himself from the very beginning.

But later, he gradually understood that there was an unbridgeable gap between the two of them after all. Xiao Yun's feelings came violently and suddenly, and when they went away, people were caught off guard. He didn't want to force himself to recall the past that had long since faded. At the time, I just sighed, how could such a self-proud person let out such a desolate sigh in front of him after many years, but his heart was still astonishingly cold.

Qin Jie is still a little sorry for his unfriendliness, even if the first love ended unsatisfactorily, it is inappropriate to meet again now, but in the end, Qin Jie may never let go of Xiao Yun's capriciousness, whether it was in the past or now .

When he thinks of this, he feels even more powerless. Sticky relationships are what he hates the most, so he always tells himself to look away and learn to bless his ex-boyfriend. He has indeed done it. Isn't Xia Yuan the most Good example?

If Xiao Yun brought his wife or lover to reunite with him today, then he would have enough confidence to face it calmly and get along with him generously, but the fact is the opposite. This man who has disappeared for many years is now grateful for the fate, and he is talking about old age. The past, full of nostalgia, even made a new promise to myself.

Qin Jie couldn't help but sneered in his heart, but he also felt sympathy for Xiao Yun now. Thinking of this, he stood up and returned to Xiao Yun's side.

"Don't talk about retribution, Xiao Yun, stop wasting time on me, and you won't suffer from this kind of boring crime. If you really know me, you should know that I don't like to go around. I'm sorry, I can't be friends with you now, because what you said today is really unacceptable to me. If you are confessing to me again, then I will formally reject you. As long as you can live by yourself in the future One level, no longer have illusions about me, then we can try to be friends again, otherwise, we should keep our distance."

Before Xiao Yun could say anything, Qin Jie continued: "I still have work to do, so I won't entertain you. I'll see you later, and if you understand, I'll treat you to a good meal. "

Hearing such a clear expulsion order, Xiao Yun knew that he really shouldn't continue to pester him. Regarding Qin Jie's attitude today, he was hit harder than he imagined. The familiar feeling of happiness of strolling from behind has long since vanished under the indifferent face and alienated tone after the owner of the back turned around.

But so what, he clearly expressed his willingness to restore the old good, only in exchange for an almost cruel direct refusal, Xiao Yun never knew that his memory was still so clearly engraved with the time when Qin Jie went to F University. Every time he appeared in front of his eyes, his expression and tone should be the same as Qin Jie in the office today, even more impatient and full of disgust.

When he couldn't help venting his emotions to Qin Jie because of another setback with his senior sister, he heard himself, a gay man, choked up. For the first and last time, Xiao Yun looked at Qin Jie with red eyes, and said He said by himself, "Xiao Yun, let's break up, I wish you your wish will come true soon."

Looking at Qin Jie who turned and left, Xiao Yun stood there for a long time. He only felt a little flustered and confused. In the end, it was a phone call that brought his soul back and calmed him down. Now that he thinks about it, he is really full. Ironically, Xiao Yun, who was tortured by the senior sister's indifferent attitude and was on the verge of collapse, received a call from his sweetheart who finally agreed to date.

So, that weeping face, that heartbroken blessing, and the insecurity in his heart because of Qin Jie's departure were all buried in the depths of his mind that he didn't know about by this phone call.

In the later days, Xiao Yun had a warm and beautiful relationship. He and Zhou Lan had a passionate reaction like lightning, but it was still too late because getting along was too difficult. Until the two of them went abroad, they thought Being in an unfamiliar place will make this relationship closer, but I never thought that it will expose more problems.

Gradually, Xiao Yun thought of Qin Jie more and more often. At first he knew that his mentality was bad, but he couldn't help it every time, because he found that recalling the time with Qin Jie always brings He has a warm and sour feeling that is inexplicably addictive.

Then, when he was still immersed in the past with Qin Jie, Zhou Lan did something that surprised him again. She filed for divorce, and told herself that she had agreed to a marriage proposal from an American. The person I really love is always not me." Then he left gracefully.

Xiao Yun still didn't hold back his departing lover. Even though he and Zhou Lan had known each other for five or six years and had been married for nearly two years, the breakup brought more feeling of relief. He spent a long-lost indulgence time, Hanging around in various bars abroad, until he stumbled into a gay bar by mistake, a thorough understanding of the male body brought him unprecedented joy and passion experience, when he realized that the pleasure brought by men is actually stronger than that of women , Shocked, he had to re-examine his heart.

So, once again, he picked up the past with Qin Jie, with a deeper regret than ever, ready to move...

Silently began to search for Qin Jie's information. He found that the other party was also in the United States. Although the two of them were in the same country, it was not difficult to create opportunities to meet each other. However, Xiao Yun still did not take this step. This time , He held his breath and wanted to be different, stood in front of the man who had been hurt by him with a more mature and determined attitude, praying for a chance to start again.

Obviously, Xiao Yun began to feel extremely remorse for his original decision. Time convinced him of his feelings for Qin Jie, and indeed made him grow into a man who is more responsible in all aspects, but at the same time, it also allowed others to walk into Qin Jie Jie's world, and even his heart.

Only when you lose it do you know how to cherish such a classic drama. Since the day it was staged, Xiao Yun has never felt resistance, but is grateful, because he knows the person he can really win over. How many people will never encounter such awareness in their lifetime? ...

However, classic dramas will also have unconventional endings. Reunion after a broken mirror has always been Xiao Yun's longing. Besides, he will always get what he wants in the end. Qin Jie's deep love for himself at the beginning made him even more subconscious Ri took this ending for granted.

It wasn't until he met the other protagonist of the play at S University that he realized that there was another pattern for the original unconventional ending-the water is hard to recover...

It is only his own self-confidence that is to blame. Xiao Yun has learned that Qin Jie has always been single for so many years abroad. He thought that everything would last until he appeared, but he never thought that the reunion of the two not only received a cold response from Qin Jie, He was also told that his sweetheart had a new love, and Xiao Yun was so shocked that he couldn't react, so he could only choose to temporarily leave the other party a quiet space.

Back in the car, Xiao Yun belatedly felt angry at that unknown man who had captured Qin Jie's heart within a year after returning to China.

He told himself that he couldn't just give up like this, at least he should find out whether Qin Jie lied in order to escape, or whether there was a real incident and a real person.

This time, he had learned the lesson of being overconfident at the time, and he would not take his relationship with Qin Jie for granted anymore, but when he thought of the other party's refusal attitude today, Xiao Yun still gave up and went again immediately The idea of ​​looking for Qin Jie.

Therefore, in his opinion, in order to melt the ice in Qin Jie's heart and push against the wall built for himself, he must understand Qin Jie's current life and get close to the special person beside him...