I ride a bamboo horse

Gu Jinxing followed Ye Huaichuan without saying a word, his heart was tense, he didn't know when Ye Huaichuan stood there, how long he looked at it, and how much he listened to.

When he was in a trance, he didn't pay attention to how he went upstairs. When he came back to his senses, he was already standing in Ye Huaichuan's new home in Lido.

The three-bedroom house is larger than the house in Haichao City. The decoration is simple and elegant, and there is a little warmth in the details.

It feels like home and is very suitable for living.

"Your room is here, and the sheets and quilts are all new." Ye Huaichuan took him to a spacious and bright room with its own bathroom and balcony.

Gu Jinxing glanced at it, feeling strange, the guest bedroom is so big, how luxurious is the master bedroom?Calculated in this way, the area does not seem to be enough. Is there any hidden space?

"Brother, where's your room?" He asked a little hesitantly.

Ye Huaichuan pointed to the door next to him, "There."

"I still have something to do." Before Gu Jinxing could speak, Ye Huaichuan said, "If you want to take a shower, there are new pajamas and clothes in the cabinet. If you want to play, there are computers and TVs. The wireless password is your birthday."

Gu Jinxing was a little stunned, the wireless password of Ye Huaichuan's house is his birthday?He opened his mouth and finally said, "Okay."

Obediently, he dug out his pajamas from the cabinet, went into the bathroom and took a shower, and walked to the balcony connected to the room to watch the night view without wiping his hair.

Looking down from this height, this floor has at least the appearance of sixteen, seven or eight floors.

The night lights are gorgeous, embellishing the whole city into a dreamy night kingdom.

But it was very strange, reminding Gu Jinxing of those years when he went to other countries alone.Lonely, at a loss.

But when he thought about it for a while, his brother was in a room not far from him, and his erratic heart gradually settled down again.

Yes, he's home.

Thinking about the situation under the streetlight just now, Gu Jinxing became uneasy again, Ye Huaichuan, did you see it?

With such hesitant emotions in mind, Gu Jinxing walked to Ye Huaichuan's room and knocked on his door.

There was no response for a long time, but the waiting became more and more anxious, so Gu Jinxing decided to go in on his own.

There is no one in the room, and there is water in the bathroom.

It's like the death row prisoner gets a temporary pardon. Although he is relieved, he still feels stuck in his throat.

No, Gu Jinxing suddenly realized that this room...is much smaller than his, and this is clearly the guest bedroom.

Gu Jinxing was surprised, why did Ye Huaichuan sleep in the guest bedroom?Could it be that he specially gave up the master bedroom to him because he was staying here tonight?But no, the master bedroom was clean, with no traces of life at all.On the contrary, this room, although there is not much fireworks, but at least it can be seen that it has been occupied by people, the knick-knacks on the cabinet, photo frames, a few books stacked on the table, the computer... the computer screen is still on.

The casually glanced eyes suddenly stopped, Gu Jinxing opened his eyes wide and moved his eyes back inch by inch, homosexuality...psychological research...study?

He stayed where he was, and suddenly felt that the wind blowing from the air conditioner was unbelievably cold, turning the scorching sun into a world of ice and snow, and his heart fell into the ice cellar.

He saw it, or heard it, or both.

What to do, Gu Jinxing was in a state of confusion.

In the final analysis, sooner or later this matter has to be confessed to Ye Huaichuan, but those who have no courage have a fluke mentality, always thinking that there is still time, and then delay it again and again.

Just when Gu Jinxing was in a panic, there was a light knock on the bathroom door, and the sound of water stopped before he knew it.

Gu Jinxing turned his head almost in horror, and saw Ye Huaichuan coming out wearing a bathrobe and wiping his hair.

Seeing him there, Ye Huaichuan was only a little surprised, met his expression, glanced at the computer in front of him again, and continued to brush his hair calmly.

"Did you blow dry your hair?" He asked nonchalantly.

Gu Jinxing shook his head mechanically, his heart beating violently.

"Blow it on, the air conditioner is cold, be careful of catching a cold." Ye Huaichuan said while pulling out the hair dryer.

Gu Jinxing grabbed Ye Huaichuan's hand that was about to blow him, "Brother." His voice became hoarse as soon as he spoke.

Ye Huaichuan sighed softly, "It's not what you think."

Uh-huh?Gu Jinxing blinked, feeling that something was wrong.

"I met Qi Yu today."

Why did even Qi Yu get involved?While Gu Jinxing was confused, he was still uneasy. After all, Qi Yu was also the one who knew his secret.

After a pause, Ye Huaichuan said softly, "Beside him... there is a boy standing." His eyes were rarely confused.

Gu Jinxing was a little dazed by this twist, so his brother Cha's homosexuality was not because of him, but because of Qi Yu?

"Then do you discriminate against him?" Gu Jinxing carefully tested Ye Huaichuan's bottom line.

"How come, I've heard of this kind of thing a lot, but I haven't paid special attention to it."

Gu Jinxing breathed a sigh of relief just now, when Ye Huaichuan asked again: "It seems that you already knew?"

She rolled her eyes in embarrassment, "We are from the same university."

"So I'm the only one who doesn't know." Ye Huaichuan sighed softly, his voice contained many light and complicated emotions.

"It's not something to be proud of, maybe he just doesn't know how to speak." Gu Jinxing said with a normal expression.

"You do understand him."

Gu Jinxing was terrified, and always felt that Ye Huaichuan's words were quite meaningful.

"Drink yogurt?"

"Ah?" The topic jumped too fast, Gu Jinxing didn't realize it for a while, "Oh, good."

Follow Ye Huaichuan to the kitchen, watch him take out two cans of milk from the refrigerator, and throw one to him.

Imported, Gu Jinxing's favorite drink.It used to be difficult to buy, but now it is flooded, but his taste has not changed.

Ye Huaichuan lifted the milk cover, and suddenly said: "He said he liked me."

Gu Jinxing, who had already drank it first, choked on a sip of milk, his breath rushing into his nasal cavity, so sour that he almost burst into tears.

"Cough, cough, cough..." Gu Jinxing coughed violently.

Ye Huaichuan patted him on the back, "Why are you so careless. But it's really scary." He then muttered, the rare Ye Huaichuan has a kind of childish cuteness, which can make people's hearts soften. The meaning is not so sweet.

Gu Jinxing finally calmed down, and said with difficulty: "Do you think it's scary?"

Ye Huaichuan smiled, with a hint of helplessness, "I'm afraid you will find it scary."

Then you are so naive.Gu Jinxing muttered in his heart.

"I always thought they were friends." Ye Huaichuan walked to the balcony, his tall back was very lonely against the vast night.

"Thinking about it now, sometimes I am quite self-righteous." Gu Jinxing heard his brother say softly.

He walked forward slowly and stood side by side with Ye Huaichuan.He felt as if his soul had gone out of his body, watching the pair of young brothers slowly confide their thoughts under the temptation of the night.

"If Qi Yu had told you then, would you have accepted him?"

Ye Huaichuan was silent, just when Gu Jinxing couldn't help turning his head to see his expression, he suddenly laughed, "I might accept another man."

Gu Jinxing clung tightly to the railing, his heart beat fast again, he could even hear himself swallowing his saliva.

He was probably really crazy, so he suddenly said the demons that had been entangled in his heart for countless years so lightly at this moment.

"Brother, if, if you can accept men, can you consider me first?"

He heard the sound of the wind, it was the sound of Ye Huaichuan turning his head to look at him suddenly, his unbelievable eyes stuck to his face, as if real.

Gu Jinxing smiled wryly, after all, he was still too reckless.

Turning his head slowly, facing Ye Huaichuan's deep and turbulent pupils, he looked at him firmly, and said to him firmly: "Brother, I have loved you for many years."

In the darkness, the tide receded gradually, revealing the strange and rugged reefs on the shore. Ye Huaichuan turned his eyes away as if being stung, and the cracked lake surface was calm again.

See, brother, that's the really terrible thing.

"It's getting late, go to bed early." He thought he was pretending to be calm, so he couldn't hear the tension in his tone.

He evaded the important ones like this, just because he didn't want to embarrass him.

This is his tactful refusal.

Ye Huaichuan walked decisively, as if he was eager to get rid of a nasty and disgusting acne growing on his skin.

Gu Jinxing wiped his eyes, almost sad.

He is like a clown full of jokes, when he sees his beloved handing out a bone to him with a smile, he is ecstatic and can't wait to wag his tail, but he throws it to the dog on the ground.

Returning to the room like a walking dead, Gu Jinxing didn't turn on the light, closed his eyes and fell on the bed.

After an unknown amount of time, he sat up again like a person awakened from a nightmare, and flicked on the computer.

Open the website I often visit, a gay website.

It was discovered by accident when he was still studying in Fudu, where he met a person.

The host of a certain essence post on the top of the night talk section, this post records all kinds of daily life of him and his colleagues, basically showing affection.

A bunch of cynical gay singles out there.

Gu Jinxing looked at it, envious and moved. They convinced him that there really is such a deep love in this world, even if the two parties are of the same gender.

The host's ID is Zhuo Ye. When he knew Lee's real name, Gu Jinxing once wondered if this Zhuo Ye was making up stories to deceive people.Although even if it wasn't Lee, it's possible someone else was lying.But Gu Jinxing would rather believe it.

At the beginning, he would leave a message, usually to express his blessing or envy.

Later, he started chatting with Zhuo Ye in private, and when the communication deepened, he knew that Zhuo Ye couldn't be Lee. This is a real person with a real story, and his lover is actually gone.

It's not that the virtual doesn't exist, but that it's already dead.

Envy turned into sadness in an instant.

This is probably the most painful separation in the world. They are clearly in love, but they are separated for life and death.

This post is about a man who can't forget his dead love, expressing his memory, pretending that he still exists.

Compared with that, Gu Jinxing was already much luckier, he just bravely took a step from that boundless road of secret love, and embarked on another road of disintegration.

At least the people he loves and him are still there.

Existence, there is still a little bit of hope.

Gu Jinxing quietly exited the website, logged in with a different one, inserted the USB flash drive that saved the content of the next chapter that he had drawn earlier in the morning into the computer, and uploaded it.

Leave a comment under the comic: Appearance should not be the criterion for judging the quality of a work, I am, will you love me more?I am not, do you not love me?

The most important thing is that I am, you are, and this story will continue, and it will have a faithful ending.

He had a hunch that once this chapter was published, the editor would blow up, and the readers would blow up even more, because he killed a very popular supporting role.

Just like him.

Finally he lay back on the bed, texted Lee, closed his eyes and entered the endless darkness.

—I still love him, sorry.

Many, many years later, the boy finally revealed his sincerity buried by time, calm, gentle, and sad.

The author has something to say:

The last question yesterday was like asking whether it was Qin Shihuang or the Queen of England who burned books and robbed scholars, and it couldn't be more redundant (my long reflex arc...)

Since it is the voice of the masses, I will do it! (Say it first, don’t hit me if you can’t do it)

It seems that we are not together yet... In a daze... Tomorrow, tomorrow must be... Maybe the day after tomorrow, together!