I'll forgive you when you're crazy

Wu Tian leaned down and kissed my forehead, then got up and left.

After hearing the sound of Wu Tian closing the door, I slowly closed my eyes.

What An Ci said to me just now kept flashing in my mind: "You must be your own master, not a dog, but a wolf."

Then I remembered what Wu Di said before; "I have been plotted by others and I don't know, how dare I speak so shamelessly here?"

"Your friend the lawyer who started it hasn't been around since 'that' happened, has it?"

"How naive are you? If he is not your person, I think the probability of this kind of thing happening to you is greater than him? Also, isn't it enough to revoke a lawyer's license in a divorce case? Do you doubt it? I can't believe how you have lived with peace of mind for the past five years."

These words were like thorns stuck in my brain, and I couldn't pull them out because of the stinging pain.

Being calculated?

Don't be a dog, be a wolf.

It was only at this time that I suddenly realized that if all this was really designed by someone, then who should I blame for the five years I spent in self-blame and regret?

I have always only hated myself, hated myself for a long time when I stumbled, although I also hated Wu Tian's cruelty, but in the end I hated myself. I never thought that all this was planned by others.

Why didn't I think about it in the first place?

Why didn't Wu Tian and I think about the problem that Wu Di discovered in just one day?

In the end, all the blame was placed on me, and even Wu Tian didn't doubt it.

Thinking about this matter now is particularly chilling, he has never had the slightest doubt?

Or even if he doubted it, the established fact has already happened, so it doesn't matter whether he is active or passive?Just like what he once said, "As long as someone else touches something I like, I don't want it no matter how much I like it."

But why did he suddenly contact me again?Did he know something?

If he knew, why did he seem to know nothing about it?It still seemed to be known from my mouth. He could actually investigate these things at that time, but he would rather misunderstand me and abandon me than to investigate the truth.

If he really knew something to approach me, then what was his motive?

If this matter is really manipulated by the mastermind behind the scenes, is it planning for Wu Tian or me?

But no matter who it is, I am the one who lets me fish.

I used to keep my mouth shut about this matter, now I want to know why it happened to me, even if I was stupid and credulous, this time I must know why, even if it is just an excuse, it is a right An account of myself.

Should I investigate secretly by myself or with Wu Tian?If we investigate together with Wu Tian, ​​we will get twice the result with half the effort, but what if he doesn't stand by my side then?hinder me?

What is Wu Tian's attitude?Ever since he heard Wu Di's words at that time, people couldn't figure out what he was thinking.

Thinking of this, my heart hurts again, as if I was stabbed by a knife. I never thought that I would suspect Wu Tian. Now, I suddenly can't even trust him completely.

At this time, Wu Tian opened the door and came back with a bag full of ginger and a pharmacy bag. I don't know what was in it.

Wu Tian took out a fever-reducing sticker from his bag, walked to me and put it on my forehead.

At this time, I suddenly came back up with acid water, and immediately ran to the toilet to vomit out.

It was only then that I realized that I must have a stomach flu, and eating so many greasy things on an empty stomach was really my retribution.

I flushed the toilet, rinsed my mouth, and fell down on the bed weakly.

Sitting next to me, Wu Tian frowned and looked at me distressedly, but didn't say anything more. Whoever told him that what he said on the road just now became a prophecy.

Now I really want to know why he didn't look for me after so many years, why he didn't look for me sooner, and didn't look for me later, but he thought of looking for me at this time. I don't believe the nonsense he said before.

If Wu Tian still wants to hide it from me, then I would rather investigate secretly by myself than say another word about it to him.

So I looked at Wu Tian weakly and asked: "Wu Tian, ​​today I just want to hear the truth from you. Why did you suddenly think of looking for me? If you still fool me, just pretend that I didn't ask, and I won't ask again in the future."

Wu Tian looked at me in astonishment. He must have seen another meaning in my words from my determined eyes: this is the last chance.

Wu Tian closed his eyes and took a deep breath, got up and walked to the bookshelf, found a book, took out a picture-like thing from the book and walked to me: "It's this picture that made me pluck up the courage to find you .”

I stretched out my hand to take the photo, it was my photo, but the angle should be taken secretly, I was in the crowd, and there were figures around me, but they were all virtual, only my face was clear, but the The expression is very indifferent, and there is no trace of anger.

I saw something written on the back of the photo and turned it over. It said: [This stray dog ​​has had no owner for a long time. If you don’t take it back, I will take it away. 】

I looked at the words above in surprise, and a figure popped up in my mind without any suspense, the guy who held an umbrella for me in the rain and looked like an angel under the warm light——Anci.

He seems to have noticed me a long time ago, but why?What is it about me that deserves his attention?

I got up and took the photo, feeling sour and stunned.

I raised my head and swallowed the bitter tears in my heart. I shouldn't have expected anything, but I couldn't help but have fantasies.

In the past five years, I have been telling myself to forget Wu Tian, ​​forcing myself to forget, anxiety and regret are commonplace, but in the end I found that the more I want to forget, the more I think of Wu Tian when I am the most lonely and vulnerable, and then I will be like a drug addict I felt uncomfortable lying on the bed, I really wanted to find someone to talk to, but I didn’t have a friend to talk to, the pain was so painful that I even wanted to die.

Seeing that I didn't speak for a long time, Wu Tian frowned and said, "Can you tell me anything?"

"Does anyone know who gave you this photo?" I wanted to know if Wu Tian and An Ci knew each other.

Wu Tian: "I don't know."

I wondered: "You didn't investigate?"

Wu Tian: "Investigated, but no results."

I lowered my eyebrows and thought for a while, did Wu Tian really not find out or didn't want to tell me?

When I slowly raised my head to look at him, Wu Tian's eyes couldn't help being a little surprised: "You don't believe me?"

I said lightly, "It doesn't matter if you believe it or not."

When I think that my weight in his heart is not as good as a photo, my heart starts to throb, but I have to show a nonchalant look on my face.

Is it because of the sentence on the photo, or because of the person who wrote it?

Just now, I almost thought that this photo only aroused Wu Tian's desire for exclusiveness, so that he would suddenly think of me, but now I can't help but suspect that after many years, I have long been "past tense" to him, and because of a A photo suddenly aroused the so-called desire for monopoly?

When I think about this reason, I feel superficial and ridiculous, what a pretentious and sentimental idea.

But if Wu Tian found out that the person who posted the photos was An Ci, he only wanted to know what An Ci wanted to do to me, so he came to me...

Thinking of this, I can't help but feel cold all over.

I looked at Wu Tian, ​​remembering what happened after I met him again, I couldn't help raising my head slowly again. Slowly raise your head and let yourself go slowly.

I really want to ask him, is all this true, or is he pretending?

But I can't ask because I'm not ready for the worst answer, I can't accept it yet.

Think about why you are so sad?It was obviously a big deal to make a clean break, but now it has become like a mother-in-law.

It's not that I can't accept leaving him, but I can't accept that he really lied to me.

Are those involuntary feelings fake?Are those really all self-glorifying illusions?

In the end, it's just me who is immersed in this relationship by myself?

Wu Tian was irritated again by this silent anxiety, he shouted to me at the top of his voice: "What the hell are you thinking?! Can't you just say something!"

Being so shocked by him, I felt that my headache was getting worse, and I didn't know where to start what I wanted to say.

"I'm tired." Thousands of words I wanted to say ended up in this sentence.

After I said it, I felt even more exhausted, my body seemed to be hollowed out, and I just wanted to fall asleep.

Wu Tian stared at me and hesitated to speak, seeing that I had already laid down and stopped talking, he could only turn his head and leave.

I don't know why, although my head is drowsy, but I can't sleep at all. It seems that there is a big stone on my chest, which makes me unable to breathe.

My mind was still spinning, and when I thought about his sudden appearance at the very beginning, I was suspicious of his sudden appearance. I thought he was going to play with my feelings, but now I realized that playing with feelings is really not his purpose, he just Use your emotions to achieve your goals.

Just like when he was an undercover agent, he concealed his true identity, gained the trust of the other party and then betrayed the other party. Perhaps he would not feel in the slightest owed, because his purpose was "sacred" - for the benefit of the people.

And what am I to him now?

I turned over and wanted to put these self-deprecating thoughts in my mind behind me, no matter what Wu Tian thought, why should I look down on myself first?

Belittling oneself will only make people despise themselves even more, so instead of being so self-pitying, let people think about how I should fight back if Wu Tian really treats me as a fool.

In the past few years, I have been sinking, depressed, helpless, hesitant, and unable to see hope. Now I am used to embracing despair. If Wu Tian really treats me as I think, then this time, I will definitely not cry The one who left, I want to smile and watch Wu Tian regret it.

I don't know if it was related to the illness, but my mood changed from sadness to anger, and I was secretly struggling with myself, and even thought of killing someone.

I was suddenly taken aback by my own thought, but I was relieved in a blink of an eye.

Once upon a time, I thought about suicide more than once. Although I just thought about it and didn't put it into practice, this idea flashed in my mind more than once.

At this moment, I couldn't help thinking, if I couldn't kill Wu Tian in the end but was killed by him, I would die in his arms with a smile on my face, telling him "I won't let you go even if I'm a ghost".

Thinking of this, I was actually amused by this picture, and I was convinced by my own imagination.