nowhere to go

, His reflection was completely scratched, and the cold water soaked his fingers, spreading the chill all over his body. He lowered his head and fell back on the deck of the ship. This game was too boring, and he didn't want to continue to accompany him.

The sky was thundering, and soon there was a heavy rain, and the water was blooming on the river, everything was obscured by the water, but no matter how heavy the rain was, it couldn't wake Fan Yuan up.

The heavy rain gradually filled the small awning boat with water, and the speed of the boat's drifting also slowed down, but it also began to sink a little bit.

Que Xian braved the heavy rain and galloped along the river. He had been rushing back a long time ago. The crime of leaving guard without permission was not light, but he always felt very uneasy, so he quietly brought a team back, and halfway through the journey, he received a message from the terminal. After Yi's letter, he traveled day and night, and he did not know how many thousands of horses died of exhaustion on the way.Duan Yi's letters never stopped, Fan Yuan had been missing for more than ten days, and he no longer dared to think about the chances that Fan Yuan would still be alive when he found someone.And he was so desperate to go all the way to the end, there was no guarantee that he would find Fan Yuan among the many forked rivers.

Suddenly he saw a small black spot on the distant river surface, which looked like a ship about to sink.Que Xian hurriedly galloped forward, not caring whether there was Fan Yuan on the boat or the river rushing to wash him away, so he jumped into the river and swam towards the boat.

The boat was full of water, and Fan Yuan was submerged in the water for an unknown how long.

Seeing that the person was indeed in the boat, Que Xian hurriedly dragged Fan Yuan back to the shore.

But Fan Yuan's face was pale, his whole body was cold and he couldn't breathe, Que Xian tried all kinds of methods but failed to wake Fan Yuan up.

"Your Highness, wake up!!!! Did you hear that!!!! Wake up!!!!" Que Xian cried, "I beg you, open your eyes, open your eyes and see..."

"Fan Yuan!!! Fan Yuan, did you hear that!!!!!!!" Que Xian shook Fan Yuan vigorously, trying to wake him up, but it was still in vain.

Que Xian lay on Fan Yuan's body and couldn't stop crying: "Why, why tell me why!!!! I beg you, please...open your eyes..."

The heavy rain poured on Que Xian's body, washing his body and the warmth of his heart away bit by bit.

"Que Xian?"

Finally Fan Yuan opened his eyes, looked at the blurry figure in front of him and said, "It's you..."

"Hall...Your Highness..." Que Xian raised his head and looked at Fan Yuan out of breath and called out.

Fan Yuan only felt some warm liquid dripping on his face and neck, he thought for a while, and asked very puzzled: "Why are you crying?"

Que Xian raised his hand to wipe away the falling tears, picked up Fan Yuan and said, "It's nothing, I'll take you back."

Fan Yuan didn't speak any more after hearing the words, and leaned against Que Xian and lost consciousness again.

Que Xian found a nearby town for Fan Yuan to recuperate.

The drowning and the wind and cold from the heavy rain were serious, but what was more serious was his own weakness.The doctor invited by Que Xian wrote the prescription and said to Que Xian after reading it, "He has been eating disorderly for a long time, and he hasn't eaten for a few days. His internal organs are all damaged. He needs to recuperate slowly for a while. That's not a problem anymore."

"Irregular diet..."

"To put it simply, it means that you don't eat your next meal." The doctor handed the prescription in his hand to Que Xian, packed the medicine box and said that he would come back to see it tomorrow, and then left.

Que Xian turned his head and looked at Fan Yuan who was lying on the couch, he went out to grab the medicine with the prescription in his hand, and brought back the medicine porridge according to the doctor's instructions.He helped Fan Yuan up and leaned against him, and brought the porridge to Fan Yuan's mouth after cooling down a little, but seeing that Fan Yuan hadn't moved for a long time, he said anxiously, "Eat a little."

But Fan Yuan looked at the spoonful of porridge in front of him, and didn't have the slightest appetite, he didn't want to touch these foods from the bottom of his heart.

Que Xian begged: "Eat some, my lord..."

Fan Yuan turned his head slightly to avoid the spoonful of porridge, he didn't even want to look at it.

"If you don't eat, you will die..." Que Xian's voice trembled, he didn't know what happened to Fan Yuan, why he refused to eat.

Fan Yuan closed his eyes, what Que Xian said was not wrong, people will die if they don't eat or drink, but why did he become like this.

"My lord...Fan Yuan...I don't want you to die...can you eat some..." Que Xian begged bitterly.

Fan Yuan frowned and looked at the spoonful of porridge that was still on his mouth. The rice grains were boiled plump and crystal clear, and they were still steaming, which was indeed very attractive.

After a while, Que Xian suddenly felt that the spoon in his hand sank slightly, and when he looked up, it was already empty, so he hurriedly scooped up another spoon and handed it to Fan Yuan's mouth.

Fan Yuan swallowed the porridge spoonful after spoonful, Que Xian looked at the gradually empty bowl, couldn't help hugging Fan Yuan and said with tears, "Thank you."

After receiving Que Xian's letter, Duan Yi rushed over from the capital with several imperial physicians and more than ten guards.

No matter what, he couldn't figure out why Fan Yuan made such a short-sighted move. If he didn't ask clearly, he was afraid that if there was a first time, there would be a second time, a third time, and then there would be no way to recover.

On the day Duan Yi arrived, Fan Yuan was able to get up and walk by himself, but he was still very weak, sitting there leaning on the railing, looking lifeless.

Seeing Que Xian approaching, Duan Yi asked him, "What happened to him?"

Que Xian bowed to Duan Yi, got up and replied, "I don't know...he won't say..."

Duan Yi looked at the bowl of porridge in Yan Que Xian's hand, which still had more than half of it left, reached out and picked up a spoon to poke in the bowl, saying: "Is this what he eats now?"

Que Xian lowered his head and did not reply.

Duan Yi sighed and said, "Go down first."

Que Xian took his order and left.

Duan Yi looked at the people in the distance, walked over and called out: "Fan Yuan."

Hearing the sound, Fan Yuan turned his head slightly, glanced at Duan Yi and asked, "Do you need to salute?"

"Forget it." Duan Yi sat down beside Fan Yuan, sighed and said, "Tell me, what exactly do you want."

Fan Yuan didn't look at him again and replied: "I don't want to do anything."

"Then you...why do you want to commit suicide..." Duan Yi said with difficulty, although he didn't want to admit it, but he could only use this word to describe such a thing.

And I'm afraid that such thoughts are not accidental one day or two days.

He has noticed something strange since Fan Yuan was a child, but he couldn't tell the reason, Fan Yuan has been hiding it very well, until such an incident happened, he finally understood how different Fan Yuan is from others.

Fan Yuan doesn't miss anything in this world.

"Duan Yi." Fan Yuan finally called this name for a long time, he looked into the distance and said, "Are you afraid of death?"

Duan Yi heard him call his own name directly, which was a crime of disrespect, but he didn't want to go into it at this time, he thought about Fan Yuan's question, and replied after a long time: "Yes."

"Of course you will, because you don't know what will happen." Fan Yuan turned his head to look at him and said, "But I won't. I have died before, and I know what it feels like."

Duan Yi frowned and asked, "What's that feeling like?"

Fan Yuan replied: "It's like falling asleep, but I won't dream, and I won't wake up again..."

"Since you won't wake up again, then why are you here?" Duan Yi grabbed Fan Yuan's hand and looked at him and said, "That day you said that your life like this was already very good, since it is very good, why Don't you choose to continue living?"

Fan Yuan smiled lightly, withdrew his hand and said, "One more person is not too much, and one less person is not much less. Wouldn't it be good to stay in Shaohua Scenery?"

"Fan Yuan! You!" Duan Yi stood up and looked at Fan Yuan and said, "How could you have such an idea..."

"I'm tired." Fan Yuan looked up at Duan Yi and said, "You just think I'm delusional or joking with you... I've lived longer than you know and died more than once. When I survived, I failed to survive, but when I gave up, I woke up again... Is it my fault or the world is wrong. Duan Yi... Do you know that even if I am like this, if it is true Is it easy to kill you?"

"You..." Duan Yi stared at Fan Yuan in a daze, as if he hadn't expected him to say such words at all.

"Back then you made Que Xian my companion, and you used him as a hostage to threaten his father. After all these years, you took me as a hostage and asked him to obey your orders to attack his father. You took me for real. Don't you know anything?" Fan Yuan stood up holding the railing and said, "I just don't want to be used by you, even if it's just a little bit."

Duan Yi's expression changed several times, and finally he lowered his head and said, "I'll let Que Xian stay with you."

"No need, he is not important to me, and I don't want to see him again." Fan Yuan turned around and left after saying that.

Duan Yi stretched out his hand to hold him, and finally asked: "Then what is important to you?"

Fan Yuan turned his head and replied: "Nothing." Then he broke away from Duan Yi's hand and left.

Duan Yi stood at the same spot for a long time, he didn't catch up and didn't want to ask any more, he had already got the answer he wanted to know, so he had nothing to say.

He turned around and saw that Que Xian was standing not far behind him, also in deep thought. After a moment's pause, he asked, "Did you hear everything?"

"Yes." Que Xian lowered his head and replied.

Duan Yi sighed and asked, "Then what do you mean?"

Hearing this, Que Xian knelt down towards Duan Yi and said, "I...want to stay by Wang Ye's side, I beg His Majesty's permission."

Duan Yi sneered and said: "But he said just now that he doesn't want to see you again."

Que Xian lowered his head and said absentmindedly, "At least, until he recovers..."

Duan Yi looked at the withered lotus leaves in the lotus pond, walked past Que Xian after a while, and said, "As you wish."

Que Xian bowed and said, "Thank you, Your Majesty, Long En."

Duan Yi only stayed for a while