Ayanokouji always wants me to confess

Recently, not too recently.

After the end of the summer vacation, when I met Ayano, I always felt that there was a question I wanted to ask, but I couldn't remember what to ask.This feeling is like when I leave the door, I always feel that the room is unlocked. I don’t think I have any special questions for her. It may be too trivial, and they are all trivial things that are not worth mentioning, so I put this This feeling was thrown aside.

When Ryuuen spoke to me, that feeling came back to me.

Because I can't even remember the question, I can't even find the answer.

After hearing my answer, Ryuuen sneered.

"Why do you like her? She is beyond your reach. "

I really feel that someone treats Ayano as a goddess, but all I can think of is how she is messing around and sneering.Moreover, he obviously has a handsome and gentle face, and none of the activities he participated in were literary or artistic, and in order to earn a little extra points, he almost signed up for the single events, and even in the mixed competition, he did not lose momentum to the male students. For a while, I think the title "Valkyrie" might be more suitable for her.

I feel like I'll get hit by her for saying that.

Long Yuan's voice brought me back to reality, and he said with a disgusted expression: "What are you laughing at? What's so funny?"

I didn't laugh.

I feel that Ryuuen might suddenly punch me because he is unhappy seeing me, he is such a character.However, the whistle at the end of the game just rang, and Ryuuen's attention returned to Ayano - she got off the field, wiped the sweat on the back of her hand, walked to the time surface without saying a word, and began to study Sports and strategies for your next game.Ryuuen called Mio Ibuki who had just lost the game next to him to give Ayano a bottle of frozen energy drink.

I don't know why Ryuuen always seems to be tolerant to Ayano, it's impossible for him to give in to others like that.

If he really likes Ayano, according to my thinking, he might take it by any means.

But unexpectedly, he didn't interfere with anything, and he didn't take the initiative to walk in front of Ayano, pretending to be unfamiliar.

Ayano never mentioned anything about her and Ryuuen.

Ibuki probably has been ordered to do this kind of thing a lot, so after giving Ryuuen a blank look, he went straight to Ayano with a drink.After taking a look, Ayano did not refuse, and directly opened the bottle and drank it. Yibuki seemed to have said something, and Ayano smiled and held the back of her head and forced her to feed Yibuki, which choked her for a long time. In her white eyes, she continued to drink leisurely.

It is estimated that Yi Chui hurt her, aren't you afraid that I will drug you?

Then Ayano fed her and said, let's go to hell together.

In fact, it is easy to see whether there is any drug.

The simplest is to look at the color of the liquid, whether there is sediment;

Whether the opening of the bottle has been opened;

Whether there are pinholes;

If there is still sparkling water, if it has been opened, will the bubbles run away?

and many more.

I don't know where Ayano got such miscellaneous knowledge.

The question is that I played it when I was a child.

Ayano didn't fail, after all, she became the head of the club, and members surrounded her every time.I didn't plan to go up either, because she would definitely pretend not to see it.

In the afternoon, I participated in the loan race.Because of the high difficulty items set in the game, redraws are allowed, but you need to wait for 30 seconds.

The very first note got me in trouble - "bring ten friends".

My friend, what flashed through my mind was Mitsuki Ayano, and she could fully meet my mission requirements by calling people from the club.

I looked around, and almost at the same time I could think of Ayano's refusal face, but I also thought about the countermeasures, but I didn't see Ayano.It feels like being left behind.

At least when she played, I basically watched the whole thing.When I was competing, where did she go to let the wind go?

While I was still thinking, Chi's voice sounded: "Ayanokouji! Hurry up! Don't be in a daze!"

Timing is victory.

I decided to change the sign.

After 30 seconds, the second lottery made me fall into silence.

"the person I like".

"Excuse me, please change the sign." I thought for a while, and then asked the classmate in charge of changing the sign, "Can you keep this one for me?"

"What do you want this for?"

The other party is very strange, this is just a piece of printed paper, a cut note.

You can print as many as you want if you like.

"The existence of some things is ordinary, but because it is endowed with meaning, it is extraordinary."

Ayano said so.

"It's like saying that Ayanokouji is just Ayanokouji, but when he meets me, Ayanokouji is not just Ayanokouji, but also my back desk, partner, debt collector, philosopher, hypocrite, poor guy, warrior, teaching director..."

After she said it, she turned into hurting me.

……

I said, "I'll keep it useful."

In fact, I didn't know why I had this idea at the time.It was after the fact that I started to make excuses for my actions.I was thinking, if one day I was forced to leave this school, this could be my suicide note—a suicide note without any trace of me on it.Maybe no one knows, but it really existed.

People's sixth sense is an unexplainable metaphysics.

I don't know whether it was because of what happened later that I suddenly had such thoughts and actions; or because I had such thoughts and actions, what happened later.

What happened later was that my father found me, confronted me at school, and asked me to leave school immediately.At the same time, his father also approached Mitsuki Ayano, or rather, Aya Shinomiya.

When we went to meet each other, Ayano asked me, do you want to watch a movie?

All I had in mind was would I have a chance to see a movie?

Or, I wasn't interested in movies in the first place.

Instead of answering, I gave the paper to Ayano.

I told her that if I had to leave here immediately after talking with my father, she would open it and take a look.If not, she will return it to me later.I guess, after talking with his father this time, Ayano probably knows who I am.

I am not a good person in the true meaning of what she said. Most of the time I just watched with cold eyes, and my actions were based on my own interests. I approached Ayano step by step in order to let her become my ordinary person. A safety tie for ordinary life on this campus.

Then why did I give her the paper in the end?

Because it's a safety lock.

Ayano attaches great importance to feelings, if she reads the note, she will definitely not forget Kiyotaka Ayanokouji.

Otherwise, her character is too heartless. If I really leave, I guess there won't even be a shadow left behind.

After talking to my father, I realized that he wasn't good enough to take me out of this school.

Now my worry turns to what Ayano thinks of me.

I know that if she knows that I am a person with no feelings, she will probably treat me even more indifferently than when she started school.

When she came out to see me, she still greeted me casually and asked me if I would like to watch a movie.

But now is not the time to watch movies.

I asked, "What do you think?"

Thinking about what my father said to her, I probably figured out what I could actually say. It’s nothing more than that I’m an emotionless robot, and all my actions and responses are just part of my learning to become a more complete person. In essence, I don’t need have any affection.Sometimes I even wonder if I'm alone.

I keep forgetting what I want to ask.

But now I finally understand, I know.

I want to ask, am I a "person".

As I discussed with my father, my father gave me the best education, not to mention pure knowledge and academics, as well as life and martial arts, so that I learned far more knowledge and skills than my peers or ordinary people need in a lifetime .But people's desire for knowledge will never be cut off. I want to know what is freedom, what is unfettered, and what is the mundane world that my father said is boring and needs to be abandoned.And it boils down to the end-

I found that I don't just want to know about freedom and equality, human rights and emotions, but I want to verify one thing-I live in this world, whether I am a "person" or a tool for mass production by WhiteRoom.

……

To be honest, everything I have done and said is within my plan, even Ayano's feelings and moods will be included.In fact, I feel that by now, Ayano already knows what my essence is, and he doesn't care anymore.

When she invited me to the movies again, I was even more sure.

But I don't sit in the same row of chairs as she does without a problem.

Because if I knew that she was calculating me from the beginning to now, I wouldn't be able to eat popcorn like her and pretend nothing happened.

Even that piece of paper is all my scheming.

I don't know how to speak, but I always feel that I have to say something, otherwise today's incident would not be regarded as a chapter for me.

Let me briefly summarize my experience: "I had a complete break with him, and obviously, I lost everything."

In fact, it is not asking for a response. Many times, when a person says a word, it is not asking the other party to give him a response.I don't think I need a reaction from Ayano either.However, Ayano not only congratulated me, but also patted my palm.

"Then doesn't this mean that you are free? Isn't this what you have always wanted? No longer bound by your father, no longer need to obey your father's orders. What you want to do is your own will. This is your freedom."

"Ayanokōji, congratulations! Isn't this a great thing!"

I couldn't help being stunned for a moment, why Ayano can always grasp some inexplicable points.

free.

My purpose in going to this school is to be free.

Now that I can resist my father, does it mean that I have gained more freedom?

There was a strange warmth in my heart, I looked at Ayano and continued talking.

But this time it was her usual nonsense.

"Don't worry about the future. After I ran away from home in the second year of junior high, I had nothing and worked countless part-time jobs. It's not that difficult for people to support themselves. At worst, when you want to pick up cans on the street, I will accompany you as a street performer! I can blow flute."

What do you mean I will pick up cans on the street?

What does it mean to accompany me as a street performer?

I feel like I have something to say.

Seriously correcting what she said could not happen, or picking up her stalking about future events, or simply explaining her father's methods did not end so easily. The so-called freedom is now really tested.

But I couldn't say anything, just looked at Ayano.

The lights in the cinema were quickly dimmed, and the feature film started after the commercial ended.

Ayano suddenly whispered to me, happy birthday.

I don't have the habit of celebrating birthdays, or I have completely stripped these mundane things from my life in WhiteRoom.

However, when I entered school, I did have fantasies about whether someone would celebrate my birthday if it was my birthday.

"……thanks."

Instead of being happy, I actually sighed.

Like climbing a mountain, my first reaction was not the joy of reaching the top, but a sigh as if I had shaken off the burden on my body, and then I was happy.

When Ayanosai gave me marshmallows for my birthday, there was one thing I really wanted to do.

It's way ahead of her saying happy birthday.

Before she said I was free.

Before she invited me to the movie for the third time.

Or this matter has been on the mind for a long time.

In fact, I once recognized the words of the writer Tatsuhiko Shibusawa about desire and the opposite sex.

Shibusawa Tatsuhiko quoted in the preface of "Girl Collection" the extreme remarks made by the Spanish endocrinology master Mahaneu - he believed that the reason why men fall for women is only because they have a corresponding physical and psychological Mechanism, they just have this need, and the opposite sex is just an attachment.Although the patriarchal color is stronger, but I think this, to me, explains to a certain extent why I was more interested in Ayano than I imagined when I first met Ayano, and then broke through her doing all kinds of black things. Technology, the thing about designing bullying incidents.

However, there are also some contradictions in the previous article.

Shibusawa Tatsuhiko said so——

"Whether it is a bird, a puppy, a kitten, or a girl, as a receptor that cannot speak for itself, it is quite attractive to us men. What comes from the female side has a subject. Sexual speech, that is, spiritual communication from the female will, in modern buzzwords, is just something that cools down our desires."

I think I might be attracted to a receptor that is attached to me, as Shibusawa Tatsuhiko said, because of a receptor that cannot speak for itself.

But Ayano obviously doesn't meet this point, and if she really has no self-assertion, I won't pay more attention to her.

Then, Shibusawa Tatsuhiko's words are wrong, at least for me.Maybe, if I hadn't met her, this sentence might be right, because Ayano is a variable that cannot be described by common sense.

Even if she is not the answer I imagined, she is still what my heart wants.

The movie was reaching its climax, and I called out Ayano's name.

I thought I always wanted and always forgot to ask Ayano, am I alone?

Because I think there are some answers that I cannot give myself.

However, I can give myself a definite answer right now.

Ayaya, I should be alone.

Otherwise, I will not have feelings for you.

I am not alone.

Because you are by my side.

She doesn't need to know what kind of ideological dialectics I've been through, nor does she need to know how my surge of emotion towards her overwhelms my rationality and makes me bow my head and submit.

Because she will definitely laugh, and she will give me all kinds of strange names, making me feel that I am a fool without the ability to think.

Aya night.

You are also calculating, perhaps a little more mischievous.

So, today's result, have you counted it?

I tilted my head and approached Ayaya's face.

The author has something to say: Ayanokōji: The Girlfriend Cultivation Project Begins.

The next day, the plan suddenly declared dystocia...

Ayano: You said more than that, so who else did you kiss?Who are you still attached to?Do I know you?

Ayanokoji: ………

Ayano: From now on, I will call you Big Pig Trotter.