intracranial fetters

Lin Chan was silent for a long time, but still only sighed softly.

In the past few years, Lin Chan has often shown such an expression, Cheng Lin always thought that Lin Chan had something to say to him, but Lin Chan's reaction afterward was like it was just an illusion of his own.

When the two of them took a bath and slept together in the same bed, Lin Chan was still resting on Cheng Lin's arm, and Cheng Lin's other arm was around his waist, holding him in his arms.

The curtains in the room were not completely blackout, and the moonlight shone on the lake and shimmered on the wall. Lin Chan couldn't sleep, and stared at the light and shadow on the wall.

"Can't sleep?" Cheng Lin's voice was very gentle.

"Yeah." Lin Chan turned over and put his cheek against Cheng Lin's chest, Cheng Lin's steady and powerful heartbeat made him feel at ease.

Cheng Lin raised his hand and stroked Lin Chan's hair, "Have you always had something to say to me?"

Lin Chan pinched the corner of her pajamas with her fingers, "I have nothing to say."

"Has it been a long time since we had a good talk?"

Lin Chan nodded.

Cheng Lin took Lin Chan's hand and clasped his fingers, "Do you still remember the time when we were just together?"

Those memories flooded into her mind, Lin Chan's eyes sparkled, and the corners of her lips curled up unconsciously, "I remember."

"At that time, we would have a night talk every week, talk about our dissatisfaction with each other and make some suggestions. We also had a list, the things we hate the most and the things we like the most. I remember that they were all things we had in common. " Cheng Lin laughed, "Do you still remember why it stopped later?"

"Because you don't know it's just a formality, and you always talk about my shortcomings seriously." Lin Chan's face was a little hot.

"So you said it was only for the night talk in the girls' dormitory, and then you rejected the night talk with this reason?"

Lin Chan refused to admit it, "I didn't have so much to say."

Cheng Lin smiled helplessly, "But I am sincere."

"what?"

"I want us to be together longer, so if you have anything to say I'll listen."

Lin Chan stared blankly at the air and blinked.

"I don't want to break up with you again, let's be honest with each other this time, okay?" Cheng Lin's voice was low and magnetic.

Lin Chan didn't speak for a long time.

Just when Cheng Lin began to suspect that Lin Chan was about to fall asleep, Lin Chan said, "I actually don't want to talk about this, because I think it might just be an illusion in my heart forever if I don't talk about it."

Cheng Lin's thumb lightly rubbed against the back of Lin Chan's hand.

Lin Chan's Adam's apple twitched, "Actually, I often feel that we are people from two worlds. It's like you forced me to stay in your life, and it's like I hugged you and refused to let go. You see I like drawing, you don’t understand, and I don’t understand the things you do. The common topics between the two of us are much less than other couples. Others say that the two of us are together because we have many common topics to talk about. But what about me and you?"

Cheng Lin's hands stopped.

Lin Chan continued, "Before I saw you watching what we learned in private, I was very moved and very happy. I thought, I can't understand your life, so let you understand mine, but I can't bear it. " Lin Chan laughed, "It must be very painful for someone as unartistic as you to remember those things, and I don't want you to wrong yourself because of me. Especially not."

"But I just like you, and I can't control myself if I like you."

Lin Chan's voice was very cold, as if there was still a bit of winter trembling, but it ignited a big fire in Cheng Lin's heart.

"Do you still remember the time when my brother was kidnapped?" Lin Chan asked.

This was the first time Lin Chan brought up this matter, Cheng Lin frowned, "Yeah."

"You can't forget, I pointed a gun at you at the time, and I was really going to shoot you to death."

Cheng Lin held Lin Chan's hand tightly, "After all, your brother is in their hands, I can understand, you are not wrong."

"I haven't finished yet, why are you so busy forgiving?" Lin Chan put the hand held by the two on his chest, rising and falling with his breathing.

"I was thinking at the time, kill you, and after I settle my family and the others... I will go find you." Lin Chan smiled.

Cheng Lin's heart tightened, "Stupid."

"It's pretty stupid, and I also feel stupid. For someone like you, I want to give up the world of flowers and go down to accompany you." Lin Chan sniffled, "What's so good about you, even Monet is a big bastard!" No one knows, you are overbearing and unreasonable, you leave me alone for half a month, I always want to be with you side by side, you are good, you keep all those things from me, one Don't let me intervene, if you have the guts, hide it thoroughly, if your mother has the guts, don't come back with injuries."

Lin Chan squeezed Cheng Lin's fingers, "You always say that what I want is not stability, but what is your security with you? You left me alone outside your circle, and you said it was to protect me. Be safe, and then hang around by yourself, maybe one day your life will die, and when you die, my mother may not be by your side and I won’t see you for the last time, tell me, what kind of fucking stability is this? .”

"I hate this so much, I hate that you treat me like a delicate canary, I hate that you say you like me but don't let me stand by your side... I don't like myself who likes you too much. I What a narcissistic person, others say that I am heartless and like to be willful, but I like it, people just want to live a comfortable life, but I feel that I have become nothing like myself, my mother's family is almost Because you are dead, I still want to die with you, worrying about gains and losses, living in fear all day long, whoever is gone will not be able to live, the earth will not continue to rotate, but I am spineless, I just can’t bear you. "

"Damn it." Lin Chan gritted his teeth and choked up, "I shouldn't be like this, I shouldn't take you too seriously, family is more important than you, painting is more important than you, everything I like is more important than you. Anyway, don’t you let me interfere in your affairs, I’ll just go outside and have fun. If I receive the news of your death one day, it shouldn’t be too late to go down to find you. I’ll make more fucking money when I’m alive for a trip."

Cheng Lin's heart was pounding, and he was afraid that his voice would tremble when he opened his mouth. After he calmed down for a long time, he said, "It's okay, you are really stupid. The Cheng family will be cleaned up soon, and I will be fine." , Cheng Lin hugged Lin Chan tightly, "We'll be fine."

"Who cares if you have nothing to do?" Lin Chan tried to push Cheng Lin away with his elbow, "I don't care about your affairs and you don't meddle in mine. I don't need protection that much, and you are not as powerful as you look. Tomorrow I don't need you to accompany me."

Cheng Lin took a deep breath, "Good boy, I want to stay by your side." He raised his hand and wiped the tears on Lin Chan's cheek.

"Let's live a good life in the future, okay? No one will try to be brave."

Lin Chan knocked Cheng Lin's hand away, and wiped her tears with the back of her hand.

Cheng Lin had no choice but to withdraw his hand and patted Lin Chan's back lightly.

The breath of the two blended in the air, cuddling each other and gradually falling asleep.