white head

How that memory started or ended is not a painful experience worth remembering and recalling for Fei Ran.

But for countless days and nights after going here for many years, when he closed his eyes, he would always see a young man standing with a smile and a handsome face.

The boy is standing under a pear tree against an overwhelming white background.

The white is warm and moist like suet, and the fresh green like a mountain stream is shining.

It was the leaves of the pear tree fluttering and falling, resting on the young man's thin shoulders.

In the boy's eyes there is a spring where warblers fly and grass grows.

Fei Ran stood where she was, watched the young man raise his eyes, and then smiled quietly at him.

The figure of the young man stepped back slowly, waving his hands and smiling at the silent Xianjun:

"Crimson Ran."

The smile that I haven't seen for so many years is obviously a familiar expression that I have been used to for a long time.

Fei Ran strode forward and ran over, and woke up suddenly when she grabbed a small piece of clothes.

He clutched his chest and sat up from the bed, watching sadly that the pear blossoms outside the window had all fallen, and the dark empty branches were covered with moonlight.

Once upon a time, it was also full of countless plump flowers.

Fei Ran closed her eyes and lay down again, but could no longer fall asleep.

After so many sleepless and joyless nights, he finally began to believe that Su Ersan had really left him.

He still remembers that that memory began when he walked into the illusion woven for him by Fengli.

It's like walking into a reincarnation of past and present lives, where he is no longer the noble Fei Qin Xianjun, he is just Fei Ran, the shopkeeper of an ordinary jewelry store in Chang'an City.

On that snowy night in Chang'an during the winter solstice, he rescued a young master who looked arrogant.

The young master in this life, Linli in the previous life.His name is Su Ersan.

He remembered the snowy day, when he saw him sneaking out of the mansion, holding a light yellow palace lantern in his hand, the sky was filled with an ambiguous warmth in the snowy night.

He quickly took two steps to follow behind that young master. It was the first time he walked side by side with him on such a long road reflecting the moonlight.

He walked on the boy's right, and gently put his hand on the side of the boy's face, pretending to be able to touch the boy's face.

He bent his fingers over and over again, and used his thumbs to show the warmth and balance, as if the touch from the next second could become real and warm.

Spring feast, Huadiao cup.

He sat on the grass next to the young man with his chin in his hand, and watched the young man grinding his teeth until he turned his face, smiling warmly and sincerely, and asked "myself":

"What does Shopkeeper Fei think of this Qin Gengniang?"

Fei Ran sat on the grass, looked at herself many years ago, took a pile of peeled almonds with peace of mind, and pulled them into her mouth in one breath, smiling naturally.

Or turn around and smile, and look at the young man on the side jokingly.

His eyes were burning hot, like sparks were burned in his eyes.

He sat aside and watched for a long time, and his light smile turned into a wry smile.

He only realized when he saw that look in his eyes, probably since then, he has been unable to let go of the person in front of him.

A thousand years ago it was Linli, and a thousand years later it was Su Ersan.

It was originally a heterosexual existence.

Only because when I was with that young master, did I know that the sky is blue and the flowers are fragrant. Happiness is like the almond in the hand, it exists heavily and truly.

It's a pity that the people in it couldn't see clearly until the end.

And when he saw it clearly, although he was still standing at the beginning of the story, he was powerless to change the ending.

Then, he saw Fengli.

A bright smile with picturesque features.While playing the piano, golden butterflies fluttered around, forcing the silly musician not to look directly at it.

In the end, he couldn't help it, raised his head timidly, and carefully met those shining eyes.

Everyone only heard a crisp sound of "pop", and when they looked up, they were collectively stunned.

One of the seven strings broke, and it was dangling in the air.

The one who lost his composure was actually the handsome nine-tailed fox.

The king of Qingqiu who could overwhelm half of Chang'an with a single smile.In the moment of looking at each other, but because of a sufficiently ordinary mortal, they were flustered and at a loss.

Two people, separated by a piano, four lines of tears.

Feng Li raised his eyebrows and smiled slightly, his crisp joy made Fei Ran's chest tight when he saw it.

It was as if something had condensed on my heart and then peeled off, a thick layer.

Fei Ran sat in the courtyard of the Su Mansion, the leaves of the plane tree turned golden yellow day by day, as if filled with the scenery of the past.

He reached out to catch it, but quickly retracted before reaching halfway.At that moment, Xianjun Feiqin, who did not change his color when the world collapsed before his eyes, showed a bewildered expression like a small animal for the first time.

He counted the days and passed them day by day, seeing the dawn through the window at dawn and the sunset of dawn.

Seeing the young master of the Su family sitting in Huatangchun swaggeringly like the proprietress, what he heard and seen was not only bookish but also a profiteer.

A slap in the eye implied that he stayed where he was obediently, and turned around, his tongue glowing like a lotus flower. A pomegranate hairpin was sold at three times the price.

Or maybe Young Master Su has a lot of money and wealth, offering food and drink every day.The book boy named San'er went back and forth three times a day, and was unshakeable.

The chef of the Su Mansion burst into tears.The five big and three thick men are crouching in the kitchen in an apron trimmed with lotus leaves, kneading green balls, and falling in love with red bean paste every day.I can't wait to go up and down and all three generations were born in Suzhou.

Watching Fengli kick on the pear tree, with his hips on his hips, he cursed at Bai Xiaolihua.

Seeing Hua Lian enter the door, Su Ersan was fighting with tongues and tongues, he had already cut his little cousin into pieces in his heart, he pulled his facial features, and smiled harmlessly and kindly.

And that day, the flower is Manjusri, and the spring is still the same.

Young Master Su took a pot of Qiongsu, sat the shopkeeper Fei on the eaves, and looked at the moon and flowers through the wooden fence.

The tree under the moon, the tree in the flower.

Su Ersan took a sip of Qiongsu and casually played with a river lantern made of Sichuan brocade.

Fei Ran looked a little strange, took it over and looked it up and down, and asked with a smile:

"This is?"

Young Master Su's cheeks were slightly flushed, with a disdainful expression of "I don't know this", with a small sip of wine in his mouth, he spoke vaguely:

"The shopkeeper Fei is an unborn expert, so of course he doesn't know such mundane things as river lanterns."

Fei Ran casually flipped the lotus fixed in the center of the lamp with bamboo pieces, knowing that this was an indirect little awkwardness of Young Master Su, so she continued to laugh:

"River lantern? That was put in the river? Now?"

"Of course not now."

Young Master Su smiled brightly, and gave a big smile to a river lantern:

"It's just trying to do it first. If you do it yourself, it will be more sincere after all."

After thinking about it, the movements of the hands slowed down:

"Hey."

He turned his face away with a fierce expression on his face.

Fei Ran looked at him with foggy eyes, the corners of his eyes were bent, and his smile became brighter and brighter.

"I said Fei Ran, wait a few days, March [-]rd, how about going to release the river lantern together...?"

"it is good."

Fei Ran readily agreed, but after a while she remembered something, her smile faded, and she repeated involuntarily:

"it is good……"

More like a promise to myself.

Then one day, Fei Ran suddenly remembered that she had to accompany that young master to set off a river lantern.At that time, a spring and a summer had passed.

Later, during the Mid-Autumn Festival of that year, Su Ersan told Bai Jin that he was going back to the human world, and then sneaked to the banks of the Qujiang River, where he lit a river lantern all night.

He thought, so there will always be one, which will be seen by heaven.

Fei Ran didn't know how long she had stayed in this dream, but in those years when she was beautiful, the boy was only two or three meters away from him, yet the world was far away.

More and more people appeared, until one day, Fei Ran heard Bai Jin say to Su Ersan:

"If you want to save Fei Ran, you have to go to Qingyao Mountain."

Fei Ran's face turned pale.

Of course he knew that since ancient times Qing had to produce elixir, but he also knew that the opposite sentence was that since ancient times Wu Luo liked to kill.

He didn't want to believe that the young master who was pampered and spoiled since he was a child, that noble son who urinated and never touched the spring water with his fingers, would even give up his life for a person he had only known for a few months.

Finally, that day, Young Master Su lied to Master Su and traveled all the way across mountains and rivers, standing alone at Qingyaoxia.

That day, Young Master Su relied on a wooden stick he picked up from no one knew where, and walked around for a whole day.

It's not the quiet night and spring mountains and empty mountains, but the desolate and quiet Qingyao Mountain. Above halfway up the mountain, even the wind is bitter.

Huge and ferocious rough rocks, the original gray color has aged to an old yellow in the time.

Halfway down the road, it was broken, and there was a large vertical stone wall across the front, and there were only a few scattered footprints on the surface of the potholes.

Su Ersan threw down the branch, broke the stone with his hands, breathed a sigh of relief, and showed a slightly reassuring smile.

One hand climbed up to a concave hole on the upper right, gritted his teeth, and put the other foot on it as hard as he could, and took the second step after stepping firmly.

After repeating this, when stepping on the fourth concave hole, a few trivial stones suddenly rolled down from the top of his head and hit him straight.

Su Ersan was so frightened by the sudden turn of events that his face turned pale, and subconsciously stretched out his hands to block him in desperation.

So with the movement of letting go of one hand, after a short "plop" sound, Young Master Su fell down on the small open space where he was standing at first with a bruised nose and a swollen face.

Under the eyes are the cliffs, and the occasional broken dead leaves in the valley are blown up by the strong wind, and the mottled texture in the setting sun reflects the indifferent expression of the cliffs.

Su Ersan sat on the ground with a pale face, thankful that he didn't climb too far, raised his head, and looked for a few thin green spots on the high place in a panic.

Just like that, I lost my mind in a daze, and even forgot the pain.

Too stupid to climb a mountain.

It was also on that day that he suddenly realized how far the distance between himself and Fei Ran could be.

So far away that when he thought about the person who laughed and scolded all the time, he only felt that his humble, useless and muddle-headed life for the past 20 years might not be too bad to end like this.

At the very least, the scribbling in the first half of life can be exchanged for the thrilling in the end, and God has treated him well.

Fei Ran's eyes were filled with the downcast expression of a young man, and her heart ached.In a trance, it seemed that he had returned to the Su Mansion.

The sensuality of that day fluctuated, the sycamore leaves swaggered through the light, Young Master Su turned his head and looked back, his face was clean.

The young man with a lazy posture in his memory was so beautiful that it made people think of eternal life.

But the scene in front of him was that the boy slowly raised his arms, wrapped them around his bruised knee, put his head on it, and sighed softly.

Fei Ran froze in place as if struck by lightning, and felt almost chillingly that something was being peeled off from the young man's body, and then disappeared into the air with his bones turned into ashes.

The fairy in white squatted down in front of the boy, wanting to hug the boy who was so painful that even his teeth were shaking.

It's just that when the fingers passed through the young man's body like passing through the air, the powerless feeling that he couldn't clearly distinguish whether he existed or not made him freeze in place for an instant, unable to move.

Fei Ran lowered her head feebly, and finally could only lean close to the boy's ear, whispering softly in a voice that the boy couldn't hear.

As if to wake a child in a nightmare from its slumber:

"It's okay, I'm here."

I'm here, so don't be afraid.You are the one I will protect with all my might.

He rested his head on the young man's neck, seemed to be rubbing against the young man's neck once and for all, murmured repeatedly without knowing whether to cry or laugh, and was finally defeated.

Fei Ran, you are a complete bastard!This is obviously... Obviously the person you have protected since childhood, and swore not to let him get hurt in the slightest.

Fei Ran will never know the Qingyao Mountain that day. Young Master Su, who has been proud for 19 years, chose a future without him, right on this Qingyao Mountain.

He was so regretful that his whole body was icy cold, as if the whole green night wind had been blown into his heart.I felt a large drop of hot liquid running down my neck.

He actually forgot that as a spirit body, he couldn't feel the temperature.

Of course he knew that Su Ersan would not die, but when he saw that young master who never showed weakness in front of others, he bit his lip, just to prevent himself from crying from the cold.

He still cried.

Qing Yao, young man, the years in the old days, was just awakened like this.

He just thought of that day, when he hugged Qi Nian and stretched his slender waist, he was satisfied only to see someone kneeling on Qingyao Mountain in such a posture.

A feast of silver was baked, and the unmelted snow was particularly frightening.

With a thought, he also joked to Qi Nian:

"I don't know who is so lucky to make a person willing to kneel for him for a whole night. I don't know what happened to the last two people. If anyone is willing to do it for Fei Ran..."

At that time, Qi Nian feigned anger and he showed his face, both of them thought it was just a joke.

It was forgotten in a blink of an eye.

But they don't know that there is really such a person in this world, above Qingyao, who has tasted all the hardships for him all night.

The author has something to say:

Well, there is good news and bad news.

The bad news is that Claw has been on the ground and crying this week.For school activities, Zhuo arrived at the dormitory on Sunday, and the two sisters looked at Zhuo mournfully and said, "I really don't know how to..." So Zhuo stayed up late from Monday to decorate the dormitory, and made three posters on A3 paper , I went to bed at 4 o’clock on Monday, and went from 8 o’clock in the evening to 7 o’clock the next morning on Tuesday, and finally finished the last picture. When I came out of the electronic reading room, I went to the toilet and vomited.

As a result, it sadly caused the old problem of stomach pain.Aww, it is said that the claw once issued a critical illness notice because of vomiting blood, it is not a lie.

At that time, Mother Zhuo wanted to transfer Zhuo to another hospital, but the doctor said very straightforwardly: "It's okay to transfer, in case she is on the way... we can't pay the responsibility."

When Zhuao heard it, he vomited even more: "Uncle, you can't say such things in front of the person involved on TV, uncle, you dare not follow the plot!"

Well, let’s get far...but this weekend I will make a PPT, use it on Tuesday, and vomit blood.

Silently, Claw will try to find time to write.

The good news is that the claw has compromised, Fengli will not die, the nerd has awakened, and he will no longer be called a nerd, but bean sugar... As for what happened, it is Fei Xiaogong's self-torture process...