long regret

As a man, I know that I am really unmanly.

But I think I should understand the importance of responsibility.

I can't ruin his life because of my own greed.He promised to marry me, but I know he doesn't understand anything.

I was anxiously thinking about what he would think of me if one day he understood what liking is.

A liar who took advantage of his ignorance and ruined his reputation.

Will he hate me.

When he understands what liking is, will he understand what hate is?will he hate me

I didn't even have the courage to touch him.

Love is not a battlefield, you can never fight like a war, with ego and high emotions, savagely attacking cities and lands.

As much as I want to.

He drank too much, as if drinking too much for the first time, frowning in confusion.

He looked at me.

I would love to kiss him.

This was the only bridal chamber wedding night in my life, and he was probably the only person I fell in love with in my life.

This is the sixth year of my stupid unrequited love for him.

but I can not.

How will the world view the matter between me and him?They probably think that Ye Wuyou will be my wife from now on.

Really envious, I want to think so too.

In the end, I just hugged him, put him on the side of the bed, and propped up my hands to see his confused expression.

He looked at me, frowning, seemingly displeased.

What is he upset about?

His expression can make my mind flustered, and I realized that I have been tense all the time, always afraid, afraid that he will suddenly understand that I have deceived him.

I am afraid that at some point, he will leave me.

I reached out to untie his coat, but he still looked at me inexplicably.

In the long quiet night, all I heard was my heartbeat, a sound more deafening than war drums, overwhelming, my fear and anxiety, my heart almost burst.

When I was flustered and at a loss, he suddenly raised his hand.

He is still like the young man I saw for the first time six years ago, as clean and clear as spring water. The years seem to have left nothing on him.

He just looked at me with a frown, and then slowly grabbed my skirt.

I think, I have finally experienced what it means to be self-inflicted. His expressions and movements make me want to hold him in my arms, kiss him, touch his body, and possess him fiercely.

But I could only try to stand up and take a step back.

Under his still blank sight, I gritted my teeth, endured the pain in my heart and said to him: Ye Zi, do you know why I married you?

He withdrew his hand and rubbed his forehead, his voice was full of confusion: Huh?

I said: The more meritorious service a general has done, the faster he will die, but I don't want to die.

I want to live longer, because I think you haven't seen enough.

Me: It’s useless to disarm and return to the fields, you will be killed sooner or later.The emperor gave me a marriage, and made it clear that I should form a party.But the power in the court is always unsafe, if the old man is abandoned by the emperor, I will die along with him.

He stared at me blankly, he must not understand what I was talking about.

Me: Hidden Sword Villa belongs to Jianghu after all, the emperor must not dare to touch me now.

He just looked at me like that and talked nonsense seriously.

Me: Well...you are my good brother, you can't get married anyway, so just help me.

He opened his mouth, but said nothing.

I smirked a few times in embarrassment "hahaha", and I said: Don't worry, I am a normal person and will not do strange things to you!

Heart like a knife.

At that time, I thought, I am willing to cut off all my retreats so cruelly, and I assure him that I don't have any thoughts about him, I am willing to just stay by his side, and I don't ask for anything from him.

It's just because I'm afraid that if one day he understands the relationship, I'm afraid he will hate me.

I'm afraid he hates me, hates me, and leaves me.

I'm afraid I'll never see him again.

If it is compared, I would rather I can only look at him like this for the rest of my life.

This is something that doesn't need to be chosen at all.