teenage lover

In a trance, a piece of green grass was spread in front of his eyes, and two men were sitting on deckchairs fishing under the sun umbrella.

They are middle-aged, and when they were young, they went to the sky to play. It is hard to imagine that they will have white sideburns, sitting by the lake and fishing for an afternoon.

It was Rong Sheng, with neat short hair, and his facial features still revealed his handsomeness and heroism.There was no real surrender in those eyes, nor was his erect spine ever crushed.

He still has Jiang Wenyuan's most obsessed demeanor, never easily obtained, never worthy of his inner desires, calm and calm, with a lawless heart and confidence.

His wife and children were also nearby, she was a woman as arrogant and arrogant as he was, with seventeen or eighteen children, all of them looked like him when he was young.

Jiang Wenyuan stood very far away, and the picture began to blur and become more and more distant. He couldn't hear what those people were talking about, and couldn't distinguish the color of their clothes, but he could taste the tranquility of the years with his eyes closed.

If Rong Sheng hadn't kissed him at the stern, and they hadn't developed the current relationship, Jiang Wenyuan would have kept his feelings to the bottom of his heart, calmly watching him marry a wife and have children, and go through life.Their friendship is getting deeper and deeper, and they even feel like brothers and sisters, there will be no gossip from outsiders, and there will be no disputes with each other.

He saw another man in the rocking chair, with a blue stubble on his chin, wearing five-quarter-length shorts and a black long-sleeved cotton shirt. They glanced at each other briefly, and the eyes under the brim of the hat were clearly his own.

What did those silent, unmoving eyes say?

Love is not the sadness of not being able to get what you want, or the dullness or stabbing each other after you get it.

But this person gave him the ability to love others, and also gave him a love that he had never dreamed of, making him willing to sacrifice his body and soul, freedom and dignity.

When Jiang Wenyuan woke up, the smell of disinfectant water wafting into his nose made him frown. He squeezed his sleepy neck, got up and asked Rong Sheng what he wanted to eat.

"You don't listen to me telling you to come up to sleep." Rong Sheng looked at it for a long time, and said it was probably Cheng Zi.In terms of squeezed juice, oranges are probably the best.

Jiang Wenyuan took out a few good-looking ones from the bag and washed them in the sink, saying that he was afraid they would press his legs.

"It's okay." Rong Sheng said generously, "I've crushed you for the rest of my life."

Today was the day when Rong Sheng was discharged from the hospital. Jiang Wenyuan was in a good mood. He pressed the blade of the knife against the orange, gently pushed the back of the knife with his index finger, and twirled the fruit in his hand with his left hand. The peel slowly fell into a straight line as the blade passed by.

"Don't cut it, feed me."

Jiang Wenyuan broke it open petal by petal, and shook the water in the plastic basin before handing it to his mouth.In the first few days, Rong Sheng was in so much pain that no blood was visible on his face, and Jiang Wenyuan was so distressed that he fed him a few meals without complaint, but finally couldn't take it anymore, saying that he was not paralyzed, why did he need to be fed all the time?

Rong Sheng said solemnly that the person lying on the hospital bed should not move around, so as not to affect the wound.

"Do you eat with your feet?" The little nurse who was changing his sheets said with a smile.

Rong Sheng laughed happily, his long eyelashes fluttered, and the little nurse couldn't help but take a few more glances.

Rong Sheng sat by the hospital bed, opened his hands to ask Jiang Wenyuan to change his clothes, his hypocritical disease can't be cured, he claims that he doesn't like others to touch him, the nurses are always idle, and he will call Jiang Wenyuan whenever something happens .

In addition to daily eating, drinking, and going out for a walk in the morning and evening, there are also trivial matters such as changing TV stations, telling bedtime stories, and even various requests that are not suitable for children.

The clock reached 04:30, Rong Sheng said that his mother is here, he didn't exercise today, walked around the ward twice on crutches, sat down on the edge of the bed, and told Jiang Wenyuan, who was doing his best to pack his things, what nonsense , someone will clean up.

"I'm going home. I have limited mobility these few days. You will come to see me every day from tomorrow."

"Are you serious?"

Rong Sheng said to have dinner at his house tonight to celebrate his discharge from the hospital.

"Don't always irritate your dad." Jiang Wenyuan pinched his shoulders, saying that he should avoid it, it looks so ugly like fighting all day long.

"No, it's just for you." Rong Sheng grabbed his palm on his back, rubbed his face and said, "Come on, there will be many people, no one will pay attention to you."

Jiang Wenyuan said yes, he will go, he has a discharge gift, I want to give it to him now.

"I can't wait, can I see it in person?" Rong Sheng opened the envelope but did not unfold the letter, and said, listening to the familiar footsteps getting closer and closer in the corridor, "My mother said, if we can hold on for ten years If we don't break up, she will help me get rid of my dad and everything. The premise is that the two of us have a good life and let her see the sincerity."

To Rong Sheng:

What I write here is what I didn't finish that night.

We lived together for a semester and had many conflicts.Most of them are caused by me. I did a lot of mistakes. I shouldn't force you, and I shouldn't mess with others.

You guessed it pretty much, I will force you that night, one is because my dad came back that night and severed relations with me, I was actually a little panicked.There is also jealousy, I don't like you getting too close to others, even if I know you are friends, I still can't help being very mindful and angry.In addition, at that time, I felt that my efforts were not rewarded equally, so I was mentally unbalanced. I did this kind of thing on impulse and lost my mind. I am really sorry.

You are willing to pay for me, I will be very happy, but I never need you to break up with your family for me or other things to prove your love for me, because I don't want you to suffer any damage for loving me unnecessary suffering.

You deliberately did it in front of my brother, I can't say I'm angry, I just think you are really naive sometimes.I know you don't like my brother, you don't like my contact with him, because you are excluded in my relationship with him, you are jealous, and you always let me in and out of your house without any scruples, you still Psychological imbalance, plus you were more manic-depressed and sensitive than usual when you lived in my house, so your reaction is normal.But you can also try to be tolerant and make a little concession for me.

My basic requirement for you is loyalty and devotion, and my extravagant idea is respect and equality.With the former, I can live with you forever, but I also think about myself, want to get more, and want to live a happier life.

When I was very, very angry, I also thought about breaking up with you, or not talking to you anymore, and let you try the feeling of regret.You may coax me with sweet words and send me a letter with a watch, but in the end, the problem still cannot be solved. Even if we ignore it this time, it will still pop up in the future.

I want to be with you for a long time, so I can't try to be happy for a while, I have to reflect on myself and find the root cause.

Many times I am a person who has a hard time recognizing my inner desires and needs, and even subconsciously deny my emotions, always thinking that I am fine and I don’t need anything.So sometimes you say I'm pretending, but I don't realize it. When I deny you, I mean it. It's not until a period of time (maybe hours or months) that I know that I was really uncomfortable.

You don't want to let me go, I feel that I am a tolerant person from the beginning to the end, and I love you so deeply, I don't mind such small things at all, I subconsciously brainwash myself until I woke up that morning and saw you Sleeping next to me, I just realized that I have always been mindful.

For example, if you say that the dishes I cook are unpalatable, or that my glasses are ugly, including what you say is very ugly, I don’t feel it at all when I hear it, but when I do it for the second, third or tenth time The first time I think about it, I start to feel unhappy.

If a person's emotions cannot be responded to for a long time, he will subconsciously think that emotions are unnecessary things, and that showing emotions is a stupid and embarrassing thing, and this ability will degenerate over time.But the more depressed you are, the worse your mental state will be.That's why I've become someone who's always boring and occasionally weird.

I will work hard to change and try not to let these historical issues affect our relationship as much as possible.

I always think that I love selflessly and my future is too vulgar.But if this is true, before entering the operating room, you said let me go, you love me for the past four years, you are willing to wait for me, and I will not cry until midnight.Your parents were frightened by me, and they comforted me by saying that this is a minor operation and there is no major problem, and you will be alive and kicking again soon.

I almost wanted to say that I didn't care about you, but after thinking about it, the affectionate image seemed to add points, so I just let them misunderstand.

Don't be angry when you hear the following words.

Even my father doesn't want me, and I will have nothing but you in the future.If I am by your side, I will only live by you, and nothing can be separated from you.But I'm just one of so many things you have, but you are all I have, which makes me feel very insecure and unconfident.

I am in a weak position, and I am even more afraid of losing you, trembling; you are the ruler, able to enjoy love well, with ease.I can't help but yearn for equal love, and hope that I am a person who deserves to be treated well.So I think I also need other components in my life. I need to have my own career and circle, and I need to have more other things to make me feel at ease.

When you criticize someone, realize that he has an advantage over you.

I never dared to say that I wanted fame and career success, because it shames me to chase after things that you despise.

You have to know that these things are too cheap for you, and you have many more precious things, you have family, friends and me, you have your hobbies and your dreams.

But for me, apart from you, there are very few things in my life that are worthy of my attention. I have no other loved ones, and I have no hobbies and dreams that I can entrust my whole life.I am just a secular person who longs for a broader sense of identity, not as long as you love me, I can warm your bed and cook for you to spend this life-I am not unwilling, but I have no confidence to think that you will always love like this I.

I'm sorry that I often have a lot of other words that I can't say, you have to respect my right to remain silent, and I will gradually change for you.

If one day you don't like me or treat me badly, I will leave you without hesitation.In addition, I will try my best to be a person worthy of your love for the rest of my life, and I will spend this long and ordinary life with you no matter what.

The author has something to say:

The full text is over.Thank you little angel for reading this.

The biggest regret of this article is that Rong Sheng was not written better.He is a heartthrob for no reason, not only his appearance and family background, nor his upbringing and spiritual temperament, but his kindness and sincerity, and his whole person is the perfect combination of rationality and sensibility, in my heart He is a near-perfect person, but unfortunately I am not strong enough to express it.

And, I think they will attack each other in the future.And I think Yuan Yuangong is actually super cute all the time, he has the temperament of a loyal dog, infatuated with his wife, and crazy devil Gong hahhhhh