Stop flirting, I was offended

Ruan Yi opened the door and turned on the overhead light.This light bulb may have been used for a long time, the light is a bit dim, like a foggy shadow, all the furniture, floors and walls, while being illuminated by it, are covered with an unreal, as if very old It's the kind of old movie film when it is released, which seems to be slightly grainy and fuzzy.

Ruan Yi suddenly had a subtle feeling that time and space were reversed.

It's like he opened the door and returned to the previous life that was dusty in his memory.

It's still this room.This shoe cabinet.This long wooden table with chipped paint.The lampshade above the head is slightly yellowed, and the blue-and-white checkered floor has a few not-so-obvious cracks because too many people have walked by.

Exactly the same as it used to be.

He walked to the sofa, as if walking through the frozen time, and lifted the dusty sofa cover.

He suddenly remembered that in his previous life, Lu Bingchen thought this color was too ugly, so he specially changed it to dark green.

Lu Bingchen followed.

Ruan Yi looked at him calmly.

Still this person.

At that moment, everything was right and wrong, and everything was wrong and wrong, and the absurdity and bitterness of the struggle between people and things flowed out like a tide, overflowing from his heart and soaking through his limbs.He felt that his eyeballs were squeezed by the full and swollen tide.

That gaze made Lu Bingchen's heart skip a beat.

Ruan Yi handed him the phone: "Call your brother and ask him to pick you up later."

Holding the mobile phone, Lu Bingchen asked eagerly, "How long...how long?"

Ruan Yi glanced at him lightly.

Lu Bingchen lowered his head and fell silent.

Ruan Yi waited for him to finish the call, and after a while, said, "Lu Bingchen, let's chat."

Lu Bingchen felt that what Ruan Yi wanted to say was something he didn't want to hear at all.He whispered, "Ruan Yi, my arm hurts."

Ruan Yi suddenly smiled: "You are still the same as before. Every time you act like a baby, you like to call me by my name."

"At first I thought you were in real pain, but later I found out that when you are fine, you always say that you are in pain here, but in fact, when you are in real pain, you keep silent."

This is the first time since his rebirth, he talked about the past in such a calm, almost gentle tone.

Lu Bingchen's eyes widened slightly, looking at him without blinking.

"When I found this out, I thought, why?"

"Then I suddenly remembered something. When my neighbor was building a house, a mother cat crawled in through the chimney and left after giving birth to a litter of kittens. Later, she took all the kittens away one after another. I don’t care about the other one. The neighbor puts the kitten on the side of the road, and Li Ke sometimes feeds it. It also knows Li Ke, and usually follows him to grab the bottom of his trousers. But one time, his legs didn’t know He was scratched by something and was injured, so he went back to his nest to lick the wound, and didn't let Li Ke get close to him no matter what."

Ruan Yi paused, and continued: "Actually, I looked at you many times at that time, thinking, you are so smart and dazzling, why do you feel so insecure? I didn't ask you, but later you told me I mentioned something about your family, and I knew the answer."

"At that time, I decided in my heart that I would... treat you as a treasure."

"No matter what you are in other people's eyes, you are my baby here. I want to take good care of you and give you a lot of love. It is actually very hard for a person to have a hole in his heart. Even if he is used to I'm numb, I don't feel any more, but the missing hole will always be there. I hope that one day, you can say that it hurts in front of me, and you can be willful if you want to be willful. You will not be afraid of anything, and you will not have to worry about anything .”

Unlike that kitten, who is always on guard, resisting, hiding and tucking his own wound, licking and healing alone.

Ruan Yi looked up at the overhead light.Circles of halos spread in his pupils, undulating like ripples.

He said softly, "I did everything I could."

Lu Bingchen's lips trembled, and his eyes suddenly became wet.

He remembered the heavy rain that night in Yanshan, and he called Ruan Yi with the idea of ​​breaking up.But when I woke up the next day, there were more than a dozen missed calls and a location information on my phone.

He looked over and saw Ruan Yi with a pale face, leaning against the window.The first time I saw him, there was no blame, no anger, only the relief of finally relaxing, and a faint tired and gentle smile.

Black furry owl doll.He mentioned it casually, and the cake in front of him would appear the next day.Every time something happened, I was upset, annoyed, and uncomfortable.He acted as if nothing had happened and showed no signs of expression, but Ruan Yi could understand it with just one glance.

How many unspoken loves have been lightly enjoyed by him in those tenderness and indulgences, and then ignored?

"Ruan Yi, I..."

Ruan Yi smiled and stopped him: "Let me finish."

"You started to be with me, and you didn't intend to be serious at all." He looked into Lu Bingchen's eyes, "I didn't expect that I knew it long ago, did you?"

Lu Bingchen froze, his eyes flashed quickly.

"I know, but I'm still with you because I love you very much. Isn't it ridiculous." Ruan Yi smiled softly, "But I really want to love you well. Just like I said just now That way. You are too used to others being kind to you, but you lack true love, so you don’t know how to love others, so you behave so coldly and cruelly. If you were replaced by other people, those who are affected by your appearance, family background, ability, There are also people attracted by your personality. If you see this clearly, you may not necessarily accept it. Of course, I really didn’t expect that you approached me because of Ruan Yinong. If I knew, I would definitely stay away from you Far."

Lu Bingchen grabbed him in a panic: "I'm sorry."

Ruan Yi slowly but firmly withdrew his hand from his palm.

Lu Bingchen felt a emptiness inch by inch that made his heart skip a beat.

Ruan Yi said: "At that time I accepted you because I was still young and had the courage to take a gamble. You kept saying that I hadn't talked to you about the past, but now I have, do you understand?"

Lu Bingchen understood.He hated himself for understanding at that moment.

The overwhelming fear clenched his throat, he lost his voice, shook his head desperately, and tried his best to fight against what he was going to hear next.

Ruan Yi lowered his eyes and stood up.

He continued to finish the sentence: "It's too late for me to tell you before, it's impossible for us, not because I'm still angry about those things in my previous life, but—"

"Ruan Yi, please." Lu Bingchen's eyes were blood red, and his pupils seemed to be torn apart in pain, staring at him miserably.

He is willing to pay any price, as long as Ruan Yi doesn't say the following.

"——but," Ruan Yi continued, "I no longer have the courage to see you clearly and be willing to be with you."

Lu Bingchen stared at him blankly.

Tears flow down the cheeks.For the first time he cried almost unconsciously.It wasn't until my eyes were dazzled that I couldn't wipe it off clearly, only to find that my hands and face were covered with wet marks, and even the fingers were dripping water.

A tear fell on the back of Ruan Yi's hand.

At this moment, he still feels heartache.Ruan Yi withdrew his hand, covering up the tremor of his fingers that was so light that he could barely see it.

"I was wrong, I was wrong Ruan Yi, I know where I was wrong, how much I was wrong, and how badly I was wrong. Give me a chance to correct it. You can't—" Lu Bingchen could hardly speak, he could only be empty Yelling and repeating over and over again, "You can't, you can't!"

Like a person hanging on a cliff, the life-saving rope in his hand was pulled away bit by bit.

Heartbreakingly hopeless.

Ruan Yi felt that his eyes were clenched by a hand, and the heart-wrenching bitterness overflowed. In his blurred vision, he slowly scanned the room full of countless memories between him and Lu Bingchen, and the one he couldn't remember. A more familiar figure.

He said in a hoarse voice: "Lu Bingchen, let go. This is not something you can recover by apologizing, saying I'm sorry, and making up for it. I really hope that I haven't experienced this, and I hope that I gambled when I was young and frivolous and most courageous. An adventure can have a good result. In this life, every day in the future, or do it again, a thousand times or ten thousand times, it will be the same-no matter how many times a person lives, he can only be a teenager for that one time. "

"My bravest days are over. It's useless for you to say you love me now. It's too late. You know."

Ruan Yi let go of his hand and walked out without looking back.

Lu Bingchen stood there motionless.After an unknown amount of time, the door was pushed open.

He raised his head sharply.

The person who came in was Lu Yi.

Lu Bingchen lowered his head slowly.For the first time, he felt that the cervical spine seemed to be rusted and scrapped, and it made an overwhelmed creaking sound with this simple movement.

Lu Yi sighed deeply: "Go, brother will take you home."

Lu Bingchen followed him without saying a word.

He didn't say a word until Lu Yi brought him back to the Lu family's ancestral house.

Lu Yi turned his back to him when he left, and said, "It's my brother's fault. If I knew...""

If he knew that his younger brother's feelings for Ruan Yi had reached this level, he would not have brought Ruan Yi Nong in front of them like this, no matter what.So no room, so murderous.

Lu Bingchen sat by the window, like a sculpture, without any response, quietly gazing at the snow-covered mountains in the distance.

He never believed before that there was any power over him that was stronger than himself.

However, fate may not be as powerful as him, but it is more cruel than him.

He finally lost Ruan Yi completely.