I heard that you are the number one assassin in Tiandu

This made my ears itch.

"No." I hurriedly said, "It's just...he's my classmate, he lives in the same dormitory as me."

Qin Zhen let out a "huh" and motioned him to wait for me to continue.

I don't know what else to say, many obvious words feel lacklustre when it comes to my mouth, and the obscure and tortuous part is not clear, words can't summarize its shape, and I can't say it.In short, between me and the big guy, it's like traveling around the world for a week - after I crossed the scorching desert thirstily, I saw a more vast desert in front of me, standing on the top of the snow mountain The sky is falling and the avalanche is blowing away. A giant snake of [-] colors hangs in front of the rainforest. A big snake of [-] kinds of colors hangs in front of it. It fled thrillingly to an unknown stream to rest. The pincers crawled slowly by - what does it feel like, where do I start counting?

"Hi," I said as briskly as possible, "he's a boy, how can I like him?"

Only at level 30 can I open the map of the new continent, otherwise I can’t go to the lava cave. I run missions in the main city to upgrade. Qin Zhen doesn’t know what to fight in the wild.Thanks to the trumpet in Xinshou Village, I can use gold coins to purchase some small missions in Yuncang City directly from the trading shop, and I'm about to level 16.

Qin Zhen's blood volume stopped dropping, as if he was meditating, recovering little by little.He said leisurely, "I thought you only liked boys."

"..." I: "How could it be? No, no way."

"Really?" Qin Zhen recalled, "I remember when I was in elementary school and junior high school, many little girls ran with me, all the way downstairs, lying at the door doing homework, and refused to leave when it was dark. I never I heard you say sour words."

I couldn't laugh or cry: "What can a kid with a big fart know in junior high school? Besides, didn't girls follow you around when you were young? I'm used to it."

"What's wrong with junior high school, you understand everything in junior high school, okay? There are all elopements." Qin Zhen said in a very experienced tone, "Even if you don't understand it in junior high school, you should understand it in high school, right? I just saw that you left school Just run to the Internet cafe, I haven't seen anyone you hang out with."

I told the truth: "When I was in high school, I thought computers were the most fun thing in the world. I finally had a quick time to play after school. How could I be in the mood to go out and play with others?"

Qin Zhen: "What about now? You didn't play computer games every day in college and didn't say anything. Do you have any girls you like? It seems that you don't like girls very much."

Me: "Oh."

In my mind, as if standing on the podium, I recalled the female students in the class I could think of: "It's not... just..."

People say that "the belly is full of poetic and literary spirit", I feel that the female students in the class I can think of seem to be not bad, even if the appearance is not a one-off shape that completely conforms to the public's aesthetics, they are either smart or graceful. Each has its own good points, but because of this, I often think of my mother uncontrollably.

As long as I can remember, my parents have been divorced, and there is a brother who is two years younger than me in my dad's new family.When I asked them why they were not together after I knew something about it, my mother always said it very simply: If you don't get along, leave.

Since they couldn't get along, why did they get married in the first place?

I asked very seriously. My mother only said that marriage is not a matter of two people. You must also consider the family. When you grow up and want to get married in the future, you must go to the other party's house to see what kind of people the other party's parents are. .

I have been dissatisfied with this answer for a long time - obviously I asked my mother, why did it involve me in the end?But as I grew up, I gradually understood where her worries and regrets came from.

At that time, I should be in the middle or senior class of the preschool class. I could pass the message completely, recognize the house number, and hold things properly. My mother waited downstairs and asked me to go upstairs to my father to get the support.My dad didn't give the money directly, but held the money in his hands deliberately and didn't let it go. Sometimes he even asked me a few questions - I can't remember the specific questions, I just remember that I couldn't break his hand, Can't get money out.I knew in my heart that although this man was my father, that was not my home. I only wanted to take the money and go downstairs, and my heart was restless. Naturally, I couldn't answer what he asked me.

My grandma is also there, and after reading it, she happily said that she hugged such a child so tightly. I don’t think you should give them money in the future. If they can’t raise them, they just collect garbage when they grow up. , You give money for nothing.

I don't understand how she can tell if I'm "useful" when I grow up. I only understand that my mother asked me to come up to get the money, but she said no to me.I was so angry that I cried. I went up and hugged her leg and told her to give it to me. I didn't know where my grandma hated me so much, so she pushed me to the ground.

My mother ran upstairs when she heard my crying, and knocked on the door desperately. I was crying inside, and she knocked harder and harder.My grandma said very dissatisfied that the door was about to be knocked down by her, so don't open it for her, let her knock it to death.

My mother picked up everything that could be found in the corridor and smashed the door, accompanied by the sound of wood cracking, and smashed the door panel loudly. The movement was like the horror stories I heard when I was a child. My mother was right outside the door, and she was even more frightened, crying so much that she forgot to try to break free from my grandma and ran to open the door.

The final result is naturally that the door is "knocked" open.

That's because my dad was worried that if he didn't open the door again, he might have to change the door tomorrow.When the door was finally opened, I saw that my mother's face was full of tears and panic no less than mine, and the hand that was holding the shoe rack of someone's house was trembling violently.She had a big fight with my grandma, the voice was so sharp that I couldn't hear what she said, or she kept repeating a sentence about suspecting that they locked me up and beat me and bullied me; my grandma was not Fuel-efficient lamps, when the neighbors came out, they called my mother a lazy daughter-in-law who was kicked out of the house.

What kind of place is that?Maybe it is an ordinary residential building, and the people living there are also ordinary residents, but in my memory, those who couldn't see their faces raised their hands and pointed at my mother and my mother with accusing gestures. Me - who would like someone who interrupts their supposedly peaceful time of rest?Not to mention offending your neighbors by putting yourself in their shoes.

My mother yelled hoarsely. In order to overwhelm everyone's voices, she gasped for breath every time she repeated those words, but the volume she could make was actually very small, not even as good as a normal speaking voice of a mature man big.I hugged her tightly behind her, and occasionally she accidentally backed up and bumped into me, stepped on my foot...those are not important anymore.

After leaving, she hugged me not far downstairs for a long time, so long that I felt a little cold in my mother's arms.I cherished my mother who was not eaten by the invading monsters and said, I want to go home.

Only then did my mother speak—her voice changed into an unbelievably hoarse voice, as if a mermaid who had landed was walking on the tip of a knife with every step, and every word of her seemed to be bleeding from her throat.She asked me why you were crying in the room just now, did they hit you?

If I were to answer it now, I would definitely say no, mother, let's go home, but when I told the truth, my grandma pushed me to the ground and said she would not give me money.

My mother led me back and quarreled with my grandma again.

This time, there were no monsters invading, only my mother suddenly became a completely different person by my side, a little bit different from her usual, and I gradually developed a feeling in a trance-why do the regions need to be so different? Eight floors?Here it is.

That wasn't the only time they quarreled, and it wasn't the last time. The reasons were the same every time. After each quarrel, she was very tired and lay in bed all night without turning over.

In fact, my mother is not lazy, she is very hardworking and dexterous, and in the old photos of her youth, she looks pretty smiling—in my opinion, she is also very beautiful now, and she has to attend at least three The 360-day shift and the regularity of life mean that she has no chance to gain weight in middle age, and the scope of her work is related to clothing making, so her aesthetics will never be left too far behind by the trend.

When she was with me, her smile was open and gentle, and she cared for me in every possible way, but every once in a while I would dream, and the pictures in the dream were like movie lenses being disrupted and spliced ​​together, and some of my memories flashed white The indelible fragments in the movie are intertwined with her smile, and in the end it is inseparable.

When women are gentle, they are the most exquisite creatures in the world, but under certain circumstances, they will display energy beyond imagination. Unfortunately, they themselves cannot precisely control the wavelength of this energy, and it is not certain who will be hurt.This kind of harm, my whole life bear weight is enough to resolve my mother's mistakes alone, I never thought about having another person, feeling someone's tenderness, and resolving someone's fragility—whether it is a man or a woman.

On the playground under the sun, the more gorgeous the figures that symbolize youth and beauty, the more I feel like I am in an ice cave, and I can't help but think of another scene that is completely opposite to it, even though I know that it will almost never happen.

Qin Zhen: "If you really like boys, won't auntie be very angry?"

Me: "...well, yes."

——How could the battlefield only happen in front of my father's house?My family is not immune either. When Qin Zhen was a child, he also saw the scene where the usually gentle aunt opposite his house suddenly cried out.Whenever he came to play with me the next day after a quarrel, he would timidly poke me with his finger at first, lest I would be a different person in the next second.

"You said..." Qin Zhen asked, "Boys who like boys, what do they like about boys?"

I haven't considered this kind of question, and suddenly I can't think of one, two, three, four when asked to answer. "Power?" I looked up at the sky, "Schwarzenegger, don't you think it's very touching?"

If I were Schwarzenegger, would I still have to reason with others?I am right.

"Oh, I don't think so." There was a hint of a smile in Qin Zhen's words, "I just think you think clearly."

I felt like I was accidentally set by him: "Tch."

Qin Zhen said with interest: "What does that classmate of yours look like, send me a picture, and I'll take a look."

"It's about Schwarzenegger, it's none of his business." I said so, but I couldn't help picking up the phone.

I do have a lot of photos of big guys in my mobile phone, most of which were taken while eating various delicacies, which belong to the type that can only be "circulated internally", and there are also some "posed shots" of him taking pictures of gourds and scoops on a whim—— And well, it doesn’t matter what level it is, as long as it’s fun, he was very intoxicated, and I found it interesting, so I kept it.Looking at those photos, I can restore his appearance in front of my eyes, but from the beginning to the end, I can't pick any one that can represent all of him-the tip of the iceberg, and they are all greatly discounted , not enough to fight for him.

Qin Zhen: "Hey, why did you become like this, if I don't give it to you? I care about you."

I cleared my throat and strengthened my momentum: "You know it's impolite, you send a person's photo to others without their permission, and you, after seeing you, you still want to discuss it, Talking about others behind their backs is impolite.

"It's just a photo, and it looks like a baby." Qin Zhen muttered, "Then tell me what it looks like."

"...I'm a science student, how would you describe it?" I only have 1000 common words in modern Chinese in my thesaurus, most of which are still in the homework books of primary and junior high schools. "Looks like Yang Guo, TVB version the one."

Qin Zhen quickly sent a picture: "This?"

"No," I couldn't help but laugh when I saw the past, and the haze of recalling the past was accidentally blown away by the airflow, "I'm not even 20 years old, can you please find Zhang Luoya before?"

"This?" Now it was Qin Zhen's turn to exaggerate, "Is it true? Is it fake? You lie to me."

I pretended to snort contemptuously: "Of course it's true."

...Frankly speaking, the aesthetics of the photo in my hand is still a bit far from the classic shot of Louis Koo frowning, but I don't think this is a problem with the model, it's probably because of my photographer's level, I'm a little sorry, I couldn't Grab the depressive look of the big man, and take a picture of him leaning on the railing looking into the distance, sighing and resenting——I can’t help it, I want to laugh for a while when I see him bitter and bitter, and the more he curls his lips and grits his teeth at me , the more I want to laugh to tease him.

My bad taste is really naive and low-level, but who knows why I never get tired of it?I am also very helpless.