The finale

When Cheng Shuling came out, Lu Songyu was like a wooden man, sitting on a chair and staring at the phone screen without moving his body. If it wasn't for the tears on his face, Cheng Shuling would have thought he had been acupunctured.

"What are you thinking about?" Cheng Shuling asked warmly, and then put a plate of fresh shrimp spaghetti in front of him.

Lu Songyu quickly pressed the phone and wiped away his tears in a hurry: "Thank you."

Cheng Shuling sat down opposite the dining table. It was a small glass round table, just enough for two people to eat. Cheng Shuling didn't buy food last night, so he cooked whatever was in the refrigerator: "I don't know your taste, so just eat."

Cheng Shuling's culinary skills will never be compromised. If Shi Yungui or Jiang Yezhan were in front of him, he would definitely say "see if this is the best pasta you have ever eaten", but in Lu In front of Songyu, especially in front of Lu Songyu who has lost his soul, such words are really inappropriate.

Lu Songyu didn't even say thank you. He held one end of the metal fork weakly in his hand, and weakly moved the shelled shrimp on the plate. Watch him until he finally let go of the fork with a sigh.

"Do you want to drink?" Cheng Shuling asked. During the summer vacation, a graduate student came to visit him and gave him two bottles of red wine, but he never had a chance to drink it.

Lu Songyu raised his head and miraculously nodded in agreement.Maybe that sentence moved him, maybe it was the cruelty of the past dream, but he thought, whatever it is, just get drunk.

Cheng Shuling is not a person who likes to be alone. When he first moved, he bought furniture in pairs. It seemed that he had a premonition that there would be another person living here. Cheng Shuling opened the cupboard and took out two goblets. Jitter: If Lu Songyu's sadness is ignored, is this the life of two people?Not like An Wenwen or any girlfriend, but the long and long life of two people in the legend.

He was shocked by his sudden thought. Because his mother was doing AIDS research, Cheng Shuling knew about homosexuality at an early age, but did he himself?Cheng Shuling has done a lot of deviant things since he was a child, and he has long known that he might have some meaning for Lu Songyu, but it is too abrupt to put this thought out so bluntly.

The corkscrew got into the cork, and the room was silent, as if he was the only one moving. In the silence, he thought that he liked Lu Songyu, regardless of gender.When did this love start?He wanted to go back to the past, but found that his memory of Lu Songyu was a river that originated in September, and it was continuous, and he couldn't find that point at all.

Cheng Shuling thought that he liked Lu Songyu's eyes, Lu Songyu's face, Lu Songyu's thin shoulder blades, and Lu Songyu's dazed look on the podium.

Unfortunately, except for the eve of Teacher's Day, he never dreamed of Lu Songyu's eyes again.

Cheng Shuling brought the wine to Lu Songyu, Lu Songyu took it up and drank it down, like drinking fruit juice, Cheng Shuling remained silent, poured some more into the glass, and repeated this until Lu Songyu almost drank the whole bottle of wine by himself, His cheeks also turned red, as if Cheng Shuling finally said that day when he had a fever: "Actually, I've seen your mobile phone screensaver."

Lu Songyu's movements suddenly froze, and his fingers exerted force on the thin cup base, which might break the quilt at any time.

"Who is it?" Cheng Shuling saw Lu Songyu's actions, he knew that this question should not be asked, but he wanted to know Lu Songyu's past, no matter what, he could accept it.

Lu Songyu's Adam's apple rolled, and he said the first sentence after he came to this house, his voice was stagnant: "It's my lover."

Sure enough, Cheng Shuling smiled and took a small sip of the wine. He didn't taste the sweetness, but felt extremely bitter: "What about others?" He thought angrily, your lover is not here when you are sick and vomiting, even if you Not a scumbag, that's not far off.

Lu Songyu wondered if Cheng Shuling was specially sent by God to punish him. He hadn't said that word for many years, and he had lied to himself for many years. As long as he left and nothing happened, he could be regarded as That person just broke up with him and never contacted him again.He knew it wasn't right, but he was so scared, he woke up from the nightmare every night, and when he woke up, his whole body was dark, and there was no end to the long fear and self-blame, and he just wanted to forget this feeling.

But since the day he met Cheng Shuling, hasn't he been waiting like this?Waiting for him to ask, waiting for someone to know his suffering and sin, so why are you still hesitating?

"he······"

"If you don't want to say it, then don't say it." Cheng Shuling couldn't bear to force him.

The wine in the wine glass stopped shaking, the pasta was already unbearably cold, and the whole living room was eerily quiet. He just said on such an unusual night: "No," Lu Songyu pursed his lips, "he died gone."

Cheng Shuling didn't respond, and Lu Songyu was surprised by his calmness. It turned out that he could accept his lover's death so calmly, and he didn't know whether it was because of the alcohol or Cheng Shuling's presence.

The whole night, the two of them didn't speak any more. Lu Songyu almost drank two bottles of wine by himself, and finally fell down on the table in a daze.

Cheng Shuling sighed, and walked to his side: "Teacher Lu?"

Lu Songyu can't drink very well, but fortunately, the quality of the wine is not bad, so he can sleep peacefully when he is drunk, Cheng Shuling thought in a broken jar, is it possible to wake him up now and drive him back?Thinking of this, Cheng Shuling unconsciously hugged him horizontally. Lu Songyu was very thin, and he didn't think he was weak at ordinary times, but when he hugged him, he realized that he was really skinny.Like a child, Lu Songyu lay obediently in Cheng Shuling's arms, murmuring "Senior" in a daze.

Cheng Shuling froze, he knew that Lu Songyu was calling his lover, but what could he do?There are many things in the world that come first, first served. If the two of them met in the early years, maybe things would not be what they are now.Carrying him into the bedroom and gently placing him on the bed, Cheng Shuling cursed angrily: "This is how I know I'm your senior?!"

In anger, Cheng Shuling still found a towel to wipe his hands and face for him, and brought out a new quilt to cover him.After Lu Songyu was settled, Cheng Shuling knelt on the floor beside the bed and admired him carefully. Now Lu Songyu is not only good-looking in his heart, but he loves Lu Songyu and wants to take care of him like this every day Lu Songyu.

Cheng Shuling has always been reckless when it comes to emotional matters. He and An Wenwen met at a fanatical rock music festival. With short-lived but high enthusiasm, Cheng Shuling asked An Wenwen loudly under the scorching sun: "Do you want to be my girlfriend?!"

The drums on the stage were loud, hitting their hearts one after another. An Wenwen didn't seem to hear it clearly, and grinned: "Okay!"

But Cheng Shuling knew very well that he didn't treat Lu Songyu that way, he really wanted to spend his whole life with Lu Songyu.

I just don't know what Lu Songyu would think.

After taking a bath, Cheng Shuling turned off the light gently as if afraid of waking Lu Songyu, slowly lifted the quilt, and went to bed like a thief, thinking while covering the quilt, Lu Songyu must never Don't wake yourself up.

Cheng Shuling was lying on the bed, not sleepy at all. The biggest shock that he admitted that he liked Lu Songyu was that he bent himself. Lu Songyu actually bent himself with his eyes. It was terrible... ···

However, Cheng Shuling thought, this is actually a very good thing, maybe it's because he hasn't been with him for a long time, Lu Songyu is also good, at least he looks good, doesn't he?

Thinking of this, the sleepiness gradually became stronger, Cheng Shuling and Lu Songyu lay on the same bed together, and each had a dream that no one knew about.

The next morning, Cheng Shuling woke up very early, before 06:30, I don't know if it was because he was too excited.He observed Lu Songyu through the faint light coming in from the window, and saw that his eyes were closed naturally, his eyelashes were thick, the bridge of his nose was straight, and his lips were only thin.

After one night, Cheng Shuling basically accepted the fact that he was bent, anyway, he had a strong ability to accept it, and it's not like he hasn't done shocking things before.

Cheng Shuling looked at Lu Songyu and thought, if only he could wake up like this every morning.

He quietly opened the quilt, sneaked out of bed like he went to bed last night, and went to the kitchen to make two sandwiches. Just as he was hesitating whether to make tea or coffee, he found Lu Songyu standing outside the kitchen, so he blurted out: "Tea or coffee?"

Lu Songyu looked at the sandwich he had just made, and replied softly: "Drink tea."

Many years later, Lu Songyu recalled the tone of Cheng Shuling's speech that morning, as if the two had spent many years together.

Cheng Shuling soaked the frozen top oolong, and was about to take the sandwich out, but saw Lu Songyu covering his mouth and hurrying to the bathroom. Cheng Shuling was startled, and the sandwich in his right hand shattered to the ground with a "bang" sound along with the plate. As if he didn't see it, he followed Lu Songyu and chased after him.

Lu Songyu probably had a stomach problem. He drank alcohol on an empty stomach last night, and he would vomit until dark. Cheng Shuling stood at the door of the bathroom, quite at a loss: "How are you?"

Lu Songyu subconsciously waved his hand, but Cheng Shuling didn't ask any further questions, but said, "There are new toothbrushes and towels in the cabinet below, come out after packing them up."

Cheng Shuling returned to the kitchen, and while cleaning up the broken porcelain pieces on the floor, he recalled what An Wenwen said to him when they broke up. She said that she didn't feel that she wanted to create a future for her. At that time, he didn't understand what creation was In the future, but now he suddenly understands that such a creation does not require many expensive gifts and special romance, it only needs to be willing to clean the kitchen for that person.

Cheng Shuling made a new sandwich, and Lu Songyu had already come out, and the two of them sat facing each other again like last night, as if time had not passed by. Although Lu Songyu had a splitting headache, he vaguely remembered what happened last night. He was so drunk that he slept on Cheng Shuling's bed all night: "Last night..."

"Did you sleep well?" Cheng Shuling interrupted him at the right time.

Lu Songyu was unwilling to face Cheng Shuling's opinion against his will, so he nodded slightly.

Cheng Shuling chuckled, as usual: "Fortunately, there are no classes for us this morning."

Speaking of this, Lu Songyu seemed to wake up with a start, and let out a heavy breath after he realized it. Cheng Shuling saw it, and felt that this person finally gained some popularity.

The two of them didn't talk any more, they ate breakfast quietly, the frozen top oolong tasted sweet, and it penetrated into the lungs, Lu Songyu felt much more comfortable.

Cheng Shuling took the dishes to the kitchen to wash. The sound of the water was splashing. Lu Songyu sat for a while, then followed him, and asked his back, "When are you going to Beijing?"

Cheng Shuling's hands paused, but he didn't look back: "Next month, it's still early!"

Lu Songyu saw the dishes under the faucet full of dish soap foam, Cheng Shuling turned the dishes skillfully, the foam was washed away by the water, and his body was smashed until the two dishes were white and shiny, Cheng Shuling turned off the water, but did not move again, as if Waiting for Lu Songyu's next sentence.

"You want to come back safely." Lu Songyu spoke with difficulty in just six words, so that when Cheng Shuling turned around, he saw his glowing red eyes.

"He died in Beijing, didn't he?"

"No," Lu Songyu quickly denied, then lowered his head and didn't look at Cheng Shuling again, "He died on the way back from Beijing."

Cheng Shuling didn't speak any more, but Lu Songyu thought, he knew, and he didn't hide his thoughts at all.

The author has something to say: Happy weekend everyone!