[Wen Ye] Ghosts and Notes

"People who have a happy childhood are healed by childhood all their lives." The afternoon sun mixed with the man's soft and deep voice, melting in the air filled with the faint aroma of coffee.

"...and those who have an unhappy childhood spend their lives healing it."

"Human beings always repeat tragedies, pouring their own pain and dissatisfaction on their children." Piaohu spit out words, "Then in the name of love, they bound each other... It's strange, the pain comes from family affection and love It doesn’t hurt anymore. Actually—in their eyes, children are just tools to impose their own desires.”

"Flawed monsters breed flawed children, and flawed children grow into monsters, and monsters continue to raise children, and the cycle repeats." He closed the book in his hand, shook his head, stretched out his fingertips to twirl the hair on his temples, and sighed Take a breath "...and keep repeating the error."

"So, ■, ■■~"

The originally clear voice suddenly became hoarse and distorted as if it was disturbed by unknown radio waves.

"■■■, why not die from the beginning."

With trembling lips, the viscous and vicious cursing sound seemed to be directed at himself, and it seemed to be directed at some existence.

Two different but similar heartbeats gradually overlap.

Feeling the heavy emotion in his chest, even though he couldn't understand it, he felt an urge to cry.His chest was squeezed little by little, as if being bound by countless ropes, and dragged into the abyss little by little.

"Why don't I die."

I opened my eyelids and woke up from the dream.The black eyes rolled up and down, and when he came back to his senses, he opened his mouth gently, and Tsushima explained calmly.

"Are you awake?" There was the sound of the soles of shoes touching the floor not far away, "I came to find you, not to hear you say you want to die." After a pause, a displeased voice came out of his throat.

"..." Sitting up on his back, he stared blankly at the hand beside him, ignoring the impatient words of the red-haired man.Silently raising his hand to smooth his frizzy hair due to his afternoon nap, Tsushima yawned, "Is there something wrong?" The neutral voice that could not hear the emotion or anger had not changed resounded in the silent room.

"Ah, oh." Seeing the gray-haired child turn his head slowly, looking as if he had already guessed something and was waiting for his answer, Zhongyuan Zhong also pressed his hat, feeling a little embarrassed, and organized his words "It's just... ..."

"I want to ask if I would like to join the port mafia." Averting his eyes, Tsushima said lightly, as if casually speaking.

From the corner of the eye, I saw the stiff movements of the other party's body, and spread my hands helplessly, "Even if I don't want to, I don't have the right to refuse." With a hint of teasing, "Or, if I refuse, I will really give up my "excellent tool." "? "Squinting his eyes, he showed a faint smile, but there was no smile in the child's eyes.

He tilted his head, sorted out the clues, and connected the information in his brain little by little.His black eyes were slightly darkened, his fingers rested on his chin, and his gray bangs slid down with the movement of the owner of the body, casting a shadow on his cheeks.

"You..." Seeing the other party's actions, Nakahara Chuya was inexplicably silent about what he wanted to refute, and the hand beside him curled up and slowly tightened.

"Well, the current situation in Hong Kong is not optimistic~" He closed his eyes and nodded, "It's not accurate enough to say that, it should be said... It's a mess~" He ruthlessly pointed out the facts, The gray-haired child drew the end of his voice.

Watching the red-haired man's eyes widen, with a choked expression on his face, "Don't look at me like that, it's just my speculation. Because it's so easy to understand." Shaking his head, Tsushima spoke in a voice that the two could hear Volume said, "Well, Mr. Zhongyuan won't drag me into the mafia if I resolutely refuse." After a long while, he continued: "...It really doesn't look like a mafia."

"Tsk..." Biting his lips irritably, he clicked his mouth, the black coat drew an arc in the air, Zhong Yuan also turned around and opened the doorknob.

"I see."

"Well, I would."

The voices of the two overlapped, the former showed a look of surprise, while the latter closed his eyes, thinking about something.

"Huh...?" Turning his head suspiciously, he walked forward quickly, stretched out a hand, and surrounded the gray-haired child with a strong posture.The usually restrained momentum seems to have broken a corner, revealing a bit of oppressive feeling belonging to the hunter, "This is not a child's game."

"Mr. Nakahara... what are you afraid of?" Not being frightened by the other party's tough aura, Tsushima raised the corners of his mouth, and a viscous and malicious voice rang out softly and slowly "... Are you afraid that I will disappear?"

What came into view was the blue pupils of the other party's sudden shrinking, and he regained his calm look, "Well, I'm not a fragile thing." The right arm was raised, and before the man recovered, he clamped his fingertips, graying Fazi quickly took away the opponent's hat.

"It's not bald."

Among the few memory fragments of Osamu Dazai that I have read, this person always wears a hat.

——Is there any normal person who wears a hat every day?

Blinking his eyes, he silently complained in his heart.

After being stunned for a long time, like a cat whose tail has been stepped on, he roared angrily: "It's not bald—!"

"But there's a lot of hair in the hat." Putting on an innocent expression, Tsushima flipped the hat over, pinched out a bunch of ochre-colored hair that had fallen inside with his nails, and shook it openly in front of the other party, "Look, hair loss It feels like a lot." He murmured softly, "Well, it should be soon."

"..." The expression froze, unable to refute the other party, and was hit hard.After a long while, he slowly took back the hat from the other party's hand, and slowly put it back on.Pursing his lips, Zhong Yuan also covered the lower half of his face with his black gloved hands, letting out a long and sad sigh.

"Hmm, Nakahara-kun?" The door was opened, and someone was greeted with a weak and decadent look. Mori Ogai raised his eyebrows, looking at Tsushima who turned his head and stared out the window in a daze, inexplicably.

Speaking of which, about that matter——

The fact that the supernatural power of the "chat room" in my brain is not the supernatural power that I "know".

From the dialogue with the dirty just now, no matter how slow the reaction is, it is time to wake up.

If the master of the filth is Chuya Zhongyuan, then when Zhongya Zhongya was awake just now, it was impossible for him to have a dialogue with the filth.

Adding the dictation at the end that "the Central Plains will also wake up", the answer is already very clear.

In fact, I should have been able to guess it a long time ago, but I didn't delve into it—probably because I felt that it was pointless to dwell on these things.

So, is all this real, or is it purely my imagination?

Looking boredly at the swaying tree shadow outside the window, Tsushima lowered his eyes.

Even if it's fake, it doesn't matter.

Curled up into a ball, buried his face in his arms.

How boring.

this world.

He stopped thinking, the gray emotions in his head were like black lines scribbled by crayons, covering his consciousness little by little, and his mood fell into an unknown gloom.

The chaotic thoughts in the head were interrupted by a hand pressing on the top of the head, "Hey, you... hiss..." I felt the warm body temperature on the other side's cheek.

"Why is it so cold?" Zhong Yuan Zhong also frowned and touched the cold neck of the other party with the bare skin of his wrist. Looking at the thin clothes on the gray-haired child, he hesitated for a moment, and then raised his hand.

A black coat with residual warmth covered Tsushima's body.

Blinking blankly, Tsushima raised his head, "It's okay, it's always been like this." I noticed it from the beginning, and the flaws of this body "...can't die."

"Huh?" Frowning, the man said with disgust on his face: "...don't keep talking about death." In the end, he found his tone seemed a little impatient, "Although he won't die, he will feel cold." Squatting down, tightening the coat on the child, it was firmly buttoned up, "Go, I'll take you to buy clothes."

Holding the other party tightly, feeling the other party's stiff body, "It's too late to regret it now, you promised me." Said in a low voice, the brown-haired man turned around and looked at the silent child beside him, sighed, and grabbed his hand irritably. He scratched the back of his head.

"Well, Tsushima-kun will trouble you~" Mori Ogai patted the shoulder of the silent child who lowered his head, "Tsushima-kun is a good boy, Nakaya-kun."

"Ah, I know." Dazed for a moment, he pressed the hat on top of his head, and Zhong Yuanzhong also turned his head slightly to avoid looking away.

"It's just a stinky brat." Opening his shoulders, he took the gray-haired child into his arms, weighed it, and then pressed the other's head on his shoulder, and went out lightly.

A little bit, it's not incomprehensible, the reason why that person abandoned himself.

If human beings are so warm, it seems that they can understand his feelings - the feelings of wanting to give everything for him.

The person that Osamu Dazai likes must be a very gentle, gentle human being.

Just thinking about this makes me want to cry.

The author has something to say: hair loss - while driving ducks to the shelves and dealing with the mess after Osamu Dazai's death - Chuya.

Chuya: I'm under a lot of pressure (hair loss gif)

For someone with a strong self-esteem like Chuya, baldness is probably more unacceptable than killing him (Show hands)

Even if it is used, Dementia can feel the kindness of the other party.

I am very lucky, no matter if I met everyone from the Armed Detective Agency, people from the orphanage, or Nakahara Chuya.

All are very gentle people.

I'm gradually becoming a greedy guy who seeks "love", Tsushima.

Start to step out of your own circle little by little, and get in touch with the novel world, like this?

In the words of Nakahara Chuya: "...more and more disobedient#)qi)"

But at the same time also a little gratified.

"Well, it still looks a little like a child."

People who have a happy childhood are healed by childhood all their lives.

This sentence is also a metaphor for the current Tsushima.

(I started to think about what the story would be if Tsushima didn't meet the detective agency at the beginning (suddenly if)