I met you back in 2000

Lying motionless, the feeling of being unable to wake up no matter how much you scream, is a nightmare.

There was a snowstorm in the south the year my father passed away. It was the biggest snowfall I have ever seen in my life, and it was also the most heart-wrenching year.At that time, I was still in school, because of the snowstorm, the school announced that the holiday would be closed in advance. At that time, I received the bad news of my father's death just after I finished the exam.

Even though they are in the same city, the campus is not too close to my home, and there are no buses because of road closures due to snowstorms.I was crying and running in the snow, fearing that I had cried all my tears for the rest of my life before I got home.I don't want to write more about what happened later, because I can't hold the pen anymore.

The old house had just been demolished, and we didn't even have time to move into the new apartment for a year.At the funeral, Su Ze's father came, but Su Ze didn't come. At that time, he had already studied abroad and went to the United States. His father said that because of the snowstorm, the planes were all grounded, and he really couldn't make it back.In my grief, I didn't care whether he could come or not.

I suddenly wrote that this was because Dad's dispatch notice came down and he was leaving next month.When I saw the city where I was working, I couldn't help being stunned. This is far too far away. I won't even think about being beaten by my father for the next half a year.

The original cross-city has become cross-province. I don't know if my memory has made a mistake or history has fluctuated because of me.So I have to always remind myself of the details of the time and place of my father's accident, so that no tragedy can happen again after 7 years.

For a while, the sound of motorcycles at the entrance of the village in the middle of the night was the secret signal for my father and me.When he was about to get home, he always honked the horn at the entrance of the alley, and then I immediately opened the iron door and put the pedal, and the movement was done in one go, and the timing was perfect.He would bring me supper in different ways. In those days, two people had to share a portion of fried noodles, so I still remember the hard-won taste.

However, this taste only lasted until I was 16 years old.

I've lived with guilt for a decade or so since Pop died, and most of it was due to my goddamn rebellious teenage years.Just like what Jay Chou sang in his song, in my territory you have to listen to me.But Dad doesn't understand my territory, and I don't understand his territory either.So I began to dislike the old man who wore work clothes and brought me fried noodles. When he called me "little red guy" at the door of the classroom, I didn't even look at him.In the end, it was Su Ze who sent the cold noodles to my dormitory without saying a word. You see, he always acted like a well-behaved and sensible person in front of adults, and that was what disgusted me the most about him at that time.

It was getting darker and slower in March, and I squatted in the yard staring at the sunset in the west as a thinker.It's been a long time since Su Ze misunderstood that I was shitting on his bed.He didn't go to the bookstore that day, and called me several times upstairs, but I ignored him.

"Have you finished your homework?" Su Ze came over.

"Su Ze," I looked up at him, "my dad is going to be transferred to other provinces."

"Oh," he knelt down to be the thinker with me, "that's no excuse for not doing your homework."

"Did you know that Zhou Zhou's father is the mayor?"

"so?"

"You said I'm going to beg Zhou Zhou, can he agree to transfer my dad back?"

"Why are you?"

The sunset glow in the sky turned my face red, and I looked at Su Ze against the light, feeling my eyes were burning hot, "I just know that Zhou Zhou's father will be sentenced to death for corruption."

It took Su Ze a long time to speak out, "Do you think you have caught someone else's handle?"

"No," I shook my head vigorously, "I want him to be the mayor and keep doing it forever!"

I thought about it for a long time. In order for my father not to be transferred to other provinces, and for Su Ze not to become the new mayor's son-in-law, I must change history and let Zhou Zhou's father sit firmly in the mayor's position.

"I really regret knowing you." Su Ze said.

I can't answer his words, maybe I'm a fool who will shit on his bed in his eyes, talking nonsense.But I know that what he regrets the most is not knowing me. What he regrets the most is going to Harvard in the United States. This is the most ridiculous sentence he said in an interview.

At that time, I was laughing at Su Ze pretending to be aggressive while eating in front of the TV. It happened that my mother saw me and starved me for a week.

Su Ze's Diary

January 20008, 1 at Harvard, USA

Going abroad is probably the decision I regret the most in my life.