sleep in your heart

What people who are stuck in the quagmire fear most is dragging their loved ones in. The so-called "sacrifice for love" is just a beauty that has been modified in legends. In reality, what else is there but sadness?

You Zeyi realized that he had finally become a person who was afraid of being approached by others, even if that person was Zheng Zhi, whom he secretly liked.

He had to keep a distance from the other party so that he could feel at ease.

There was no time to think about what the other party was holding his hand for, or the meaning of that kiss, the most urgent thing was to draw a clear line, You Zeyi said: "Zheng Zhi, don't do this, I don't need your sympathy."

"I don't sympathize with you." Zheng Zhi wanted to explain something, but You Zeyi interrupted him.

You Zeyi said: "No matter what it is, I hope you don't get involved in my affairs."

His gaze was firm and decisive: "My own business has nothing to do with you."

The words Zheng Zhi dislikes hearing the most are "it has nothing to do with you" and "I want you to take care of them". He rarely takes the initiative to care about anyone. ridiculous.

"You Zeyi, you..."

"I'm not gay," You Zeyi turned his head away from looking at him, "The photos they took are real, but I just saw that person standing there for so long and no one paid attention to him, it was so pitiful, so I went, I didn't expect to be used as a talking point. But I am not, I never have been, I have someone I like."

Zheng Zhi ignored the previous words, and only asked at the end: "Who do you like?"

You Zeyi finally shifted his gaze to Zheng Zhi again, and said word by word: "It has nothing to do with you."

Some people's intimacy is only for a moment, and their estrangement is also a blink of an eye.

Zheng Zhi stood in place and watched You Zeyi leave, feeling that the other party was like a cloud that had already floated over, but passed through him and left again.

He had already decided not to think about these things before the college entrance examination, but seeing You Zeyi endured these messy things during this period of time, he really couldn't sit idly by.

He fought with two people from class 9, secretly found out the troublemakers in the class and gave him a hard lesson, but what happened to You Zeyi still didn't stop, and even intensified.

He didn't know why, and there was nothing he could do.

Therefore, he thought that maybe he could help him share the pain and bear it with him. It is better to share the pain between two people than to bear it alone.

He was so fascinated that he even kissed You Zeyi.

The other party didn't dodge, and at that moment, Zheng Zhi's heart was full of roses.

He thought that You Zeyi also liked him, he thought, since you are gay, then love me.

But people said: "I have someone I like, and it has nothing to do with you."

Zheng Zhi had never had such an experience when a bucket of cold water was poured down. He suddenly thought, when he rejected He Ye, did she feel as cold as he does now?

When Zheng Zhi returned to the classroom, You Zeyi wasn't there, and he didn't come back with a straight face until the morning self-study was over.

Zhou Tong went straight to meet him, and no one in the class spoke.

When you chose to return to his seat, he glanced at Zheng Zhi, and felt as uncomfortable as if the temple protecting his heart had been washed away by a flood, so his heart was soaked in cold water and shivering.

After that day, You Zeyi hardly spoke to Zheng Zhi again.

When encountering any problems, You Ze would not ask Zheng Zhi as soon as he went to Zhou Tong with the exercise book in his arms, and no matter whether it was physical education class or any other activities, these two people never walked or sat together again. Knowing their weirdness, he asked twice, but neither of them spoke, so he didn't ask any more questions.

People love the new and dislike the old. When there is new excitement, they naturally put the old things aside.

The matter of You Zeyi did not continue to ferment, partly because Zhou Tongming was covering You Zeyi, and Zheng Zhi secretly dealt with those tricksters, and partly because everyone had a new topic—a student from the liberal arts class. Girl, jumped off the building.

Everyone knows that there is a lot of pressure in the third year of high school.

Everyone is saying that it will be good to get through this year, and the light is right in front of us.

During the most difficult period, You Zeyi relied on fantasizing about his future life every day to support himself to continue. Fortunately, those bad things did not affect his grades, even if he received another one the day before the monthly exam. Here comes the obscene note.

He finally squeezed into the top [-] in the class, but he couldn't share this joy with Zheng Zhi.

The two of them are getting farther and farther apart.

After the results came out that time, a girl in Ninglu's class jumped off the top floor of the school during lunch break, and wrote only a few words in her suicide note: I don't want to go home.

The girl's grades are actually not bad, but this time, she did not perform well in one subject, and her family is very strict, and her ranking fell out of the top three, and she would come to school with an injury the next day.

The matter of her jumping off the building has become the central topic of daily discussion among the students. It's a pity that everyone opens their mouths but they don't understand, but in the end, they are all making sarcastic remarks as an outsider.

The client's despair is only known to her.

Just like at that time, only You Zeyi knew how desperate those malice were.

It's late autumn, and the temperature is getting lower and lower day by day. When You Ze looks at the people around him, he always feels that he is more and more out of place in this world.

He and Zheng Zhi became complete strangers, except for Zhou Tong, the only one who got close was Ning Lu.

It was another physical education class, and You Zeyi searched for a long time before finding Ning Lu who was holding a notebook in a daze in a corner on the second floor of the gymnasium.

"What are you doing?" You Zeyi felt strange, usually Ning Lu would go to the third floor to find him, and sit with him in the auditorium to watch the boys in their class play basketball.

After getting in touch with him now, You Zeyi is almost certain that Ning Lu likes Zhou Tong, but he doesn't ask, after all, Ning Lu doesn't talk about his private affairs, and he has nothing to do with him.

Seeing You Ze approaching, Ning Lu frowned first, then heaved a sigh of relief.

He patted the seat next to him: "Come, sit with me for a while."

As soon as You Ze went to sit down, he found that Ning Lu's legs were tightly together when he was sitting, and his body was leaning forward, as if he couldn't straighten his waist.

"you're uncomfortable?"

Ning Lu shook his head: "No."

You Zeyi didn't believe that there was nothing strange about him, so he turned his head and stared at him.

Ning Lu was flustered by the look, lowered his head and said, "Don't look at it, don't ask, just stay with me for a while?"

You Zeyi withdrew his gaze, guessing various possible situations in his heart.

"Zhoyi, what do you think when people die?"

Ning Lu's words reminded him of his mother, he frowned and bit his lips, recalling the eyes his mother looked into when she passed away.

Those eyes were full of a poor woman's reluctance and distress for her child. She probably still had too much to say, but it was too late.

You Zeyi has not fallen into such memories for a long time, he is very afraid to think of his mother, very afraid to think of how painful and desperate he was when she just left.

"Sometimes I wonder, if I die, will anyone miss me?"

You Zeyi was extremely surprised by Ning Lu's words, and he asked, "What's wrong with you? What happened?"

Recently, You Ze has been busy studying, except for physical education class, he has hardly met Ning Lu at other times.

"It's nothing, I just feel like the girl in our class, who has had such a hard life, and death is a relief."

"No," You Zeyi said, "Death can't solve any problems, only a good life can give you new hope."

After he finished speaking, Ning Lu lay on his lap and laughed loudly.

"why are you laughing?"

"I laugh at you, you live with such positive energy!"

Actually not, You Zeyi said in his heart, I am very pessimistic, so pessimistic that I push away the person I like.

It seems that all the storms will pass one day, and the bullying that I thought would never end has gradually never happened again.

You Zeyi's life has returned to its original state, he still gets up early and goes to bed late, and spends all his time studying. Occasionally, he will think about Zheng Zhi, and he will sit by the window of the study room in the dormitory and watch the basketball court. I was in a daze, but after thinking about it, I studied harder.

Seeing the gradual rise in rankings, You Ze had ambitions at the beginning. Although he knew that he was a little overwhelmed, he still had some expectations that he could go to the same university as Zheng Zhi.

Even if it doesn't work, at least it's good to have their names closer to each other when they appear on the red list at the school gate.

In the last exam before the Spring Festival, You Zeyi ranked No. 18 in the class. In just half a year, he climbed from the middle and lower reaches to the front.

In this exam, Zheng Zhi was second in class and Zhou Tong was third. Before the end of the last class, Zhou Tong sent a note asking them if they would like to have dinner together.

It has been a long time since You Zeyi and Zheng Zhi had a good conversation, let alone sat down for a meal. Zheng Zhi read the note first, and then handed it to You Zeyi.

As soon as You Ze looked at the words on it, his palms were sweating.

Neither of them made a statement, but as soon as the school bell rang, Zhou Tong came over and pulled them away.

The holiday will start tomorrow, and the self-study will be canceled tonight. You Zeyi promised his aunt to go back tomorrow morning, so he has a short free time tonight.

Three people stood at the gate of the school, and Zhou Tong asked, "What do you eat?"

You Ze shook his head, and it was impossible for Zheng Zhi to say anything.

"...You two are almost done, you are both old men, what's the matter, you hold grudges so much!" It has been two or three months, Zhou Tong has been unhappy watching the two of them quarreling, "Chinese New Year is coming soon, No matter what bad things happen to you two, turn the page for me, good brother, how can this happen!"

Zhou Tong stretched his waist: "Come on, I guess it won't work if I ask you two, let's go, let's eat hot pot?"

You Ze took a look at Zheng Zhi, and Zheng Zhi also took a look at him, then walked across the road.

"Hey, where are you going?" Zhou Tong called to stop Zheng Zhi.

Zheng Zhi turned around, looked at You Zeyi and said, "Don't you eat hot pot? I know a delicious one, so hurry up and follow!"

You Zeyi didn't know if he was talking to him, and stared blankly at him.

Zheng Zhi gave a "tsk", walked back, grabbed You Zeyi's wrist and said, "Let's go, why are you standing there?"

You Ze smiled, let Zheng Zhi pull him, stepped on the zebra crossing, and walked to the opposite side of the road.

Seeing that the two of them had finally "dissolved their grievances", Zhou Tong felt that he had done a great deed, got into the taxi, the two sat in the back, he sat in the co-pilot, and turned around to talk to Zheng Zhi and You Ze. Said: "Today, you two treat me, and you have reconciled, you must reward me, the matchmaker!"