A Guide to Keeping a Domestic Unicorn

Qi Jia and Qing Yan returned to the unoccupied sundry tent and opened the door of the warehouse. Qi Jia rummaged through the shelves and carried the things he found with a big cardboard box.

He asked Qingyan to find a place to sit down, and began to make up Qingyan.

There are a lot of props for cosplay in the warehouse, and there are also some cosplay items for men to dress up as women, such as realistic silicone fake breasts, wigs, and skirts for men to dress up as women.

Qi Jia is very talented in learning all kinds of manual techniques, and he has already mastered some makeup skills when he studied using cosmetics to bribe the ghost Luo Zi. After a while, he turned Qingyan into a dressed The Persian dance skirt, the beauty with long curly hair wearing a light gauze, also revealing a part of her waist and belly, made Qingyan look quite sexy at first glance.

Then Qi Jia put on makeup for himself, his figure was a little shorter than Qingyan, and Shen Tianyu himself was stunning, after putting on the makeup, he turned out to be charming.

"I just peeked at the women who entered the Southwest King's tent to perform. They are all dressed like women from the Western Regions. We can't go wrong if we sneak in. Let's go!" Qi Jia pulled Qingyan out of the warehouse, and Qingyan said Poke your own fake boobs with your fingers.

As soon as the two of them walked out of the tent, they were immediately spotted by the soldiers outside and shouted at them: "What are you two running around, the king's tent is over there!"

"Yes! Master Jun, let's go there now!" Qi Jia said while pinching her throat.

At this time, a group of Western Region dancers were about to enter the tent to perform, and the previous wave of singers had already come out, so the two took the opportunity to mix in.

It has to be said that the interior of the Southwest King's tent is extremely luxurious and magnificent. It is almost as big as a circus tent. It is just a tent, but it is decorated like a palace. There are even various flowers and golden pillars. At first glance, he looked like a fat man with a swollen face, reclined on the throne, and a maid beside him fed him from time to time.

"Your Majesty, we are the Millie Song and Dance Troupe from the Western Regions. I hope Your Majesty will like our performance~" The leading woman stepped forward to offer a gift.

The Southwest King waved his hand and said: "Stop talking nonsense, hurry up and perform. The performance of those girls just now was so boring that I almost fell asleep. This time, if you can't satisfy the widow again, I will cut off your heads!"

The Southwest King was moody, and often rewarded and punished his subordinates inexplicably. The woman was shocked and looked at the members of the dance troupe, so she signaled the band to start playing music, and everyone began to sing and dance.

Qing Yan and Qi Jia couldn't keep up with their powerful dancing and singing, they could only stand at the end and sway around, raising their hands and legs.

The Southwest King looked at the performance with his mouth curled up, and suddenly he patted the chair and said, "Stop! The two behind! The two tall ones, come out for me! Fishing in troubled waters, right? I can see it all! Who are you fooling?" You want to die, don't you!"

The women around Qi Jia Qingyan all scattered aside, revealing the two of them standing in the middle of the stage.

"Ah! Your Majesty! In fact, we have another unique skill. The show just now was just to appetize you." Qi Jia quickly squeezed her throat and spoke like a woman.

"Yes, we're here to sing!" Qing Yan echoed, pinching his voice.

Sing? ! !

Qi Jia (⊙_⊙) was stunned, Nima, you didn't tell me you were going to sing?Sing a woolen song? !Didn't they come to capture the Southwest King?

"Listen to your broken voices! What kind of shit song are you singing! I want to listen to it, sing it to me! If you can't sing well, beheaded!" The Southwest King didn't know why, but he just didn't like these two people.

Qingyan took a step forward, actually pinched the gestures of Peking Opera, and began to sing:

"Love and hate are in an instant~~~ Raise your glass to the moon and love like heaven~~~

Love and hate are boundless~~~

Ask you when you will be in love~~~~~"

It really has a bit of Li Yugang's demeanor!Baby Kirin, you even learned how to lip-sync from male to female!You are simply the god of ktv!Qi Jia stared blankly at Qing Yan who was swinging her sleeves in tulle.

When Qingyan finally finished singing the part of the female voice in the drunken concubine, the whole tent fell silent.

A few seconds later, the Southwest King suddenly smashed the wine glass in the maid's hand on the carpet, and cursed: "What the hell! What kind of dick are you singing about! Do you think I'm so foolish! You come after a few days of practice!" I am ashamed of myself here!"

ps Southwest Wang, a folk art lover, although he is a fat man who is greedy for pleasure, has a very high ability to appreciate music, which is no less than a judge of various variety shows.

"You actually said that I can't sing well?" Qingyan suddenly recovered his male voice, Mai Ba's status was severely questioned, and his murderous aura rose gradually.

There was a burst of women's screams in the tent of the Southwest King—the dancers fled for their lives, but when the guards rushed in, they found that the Southwest King had disappeared! !

According to the maid, two people hijacked the Southwest King, but they disappeared out of thin air as if by magic!

In fact, it was Qi Jia and Qing Yan who hijacked the Southwest King into the warehouse.

The Southwest King, who was tied to the chair by Wuhuada, yelled, and Qi Jia threatened with a kitchen knife: "It's useless to scream, if you don't cooperate well with us, you will die without a place to bury you." Split the ham into two halves, one half with Qing Yan.

The Southwest King was so frightened that he immediately shut up.

"After the guards leave, we can transport this guy out." Qing Yan said with folded arms.

bump!

The small door of the basement was suddenly opened by Fairy Yuechen, and Fairy Yuechen, who was wearing Yujie's fur coat, said, "You are Qi Jia, right? I'm here to deliver the live CD of our concert. I hope you can pass it on to the Emperor of Heaven for me. Let him take a look, Immortal Ling Han hopes that he can make some suggestions for the development of Tiangong Entertainment."

"Wow." Qi Jia was stunned, wondering what the hell did these gods do in modern times.

"You guys actually turned on the TV, so I'll show it to you, the live effect is super good!" After saying that, Fairy Yuechen came over and put the disc into the CD player.

The video of their concert appeared on the TV screen.

The song of the Tiangong girl group immediately resounded throughout the warehouse.

"It's amazing!" Qi Jia and Qing Yan shouted while watching the video.

"Not bad! This song will be the title song of our album in the future!" Fairy Moondust shook her head following the rhythm.

The Southwest King, who lowered his head, suddenly said coldly: "In the last line, the third woman in harmony from the left sang wrongly. In this song, I only heard fanatical and superficial beliefs. This is not a real song! The heart that puts the mind into the melody is where a singer truly shocks other souls! The forms are all superficial and unnecessary!!!”

He suddenly raised his head, his eyes flickering with persistence.

"Hey!" Qi Jia and the others all glanced at King Xixi.

Fairy Yuechen stroked her chin and said, "The company is short of a music critic recently. I think you have good qualifications. Qi Jia, lend me this fat man for two days!"

"But he is the King of Southwest!" Qi Jia had no time to stop him, Fairy Yuechen had already dragged the screaming Southwest King into the small door of the basement!

After that, Wang Southwest, a super vicious music critic who suddenly appeared in the entertainment industry, became popular in the 21st century because of his incisive comments and his vicious tongue.It is said that many little fresh meat stars appeared on his music review and talent show, and were even scolded by him to the point of crying.

"How should I report to the prince?" Qing Yan asked Qi Jia while looking at the closed basement door.

"Would the crown prince believe that the King of Southwest went to the 21st century to become a music critic?" Qi Jia ==

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The prince waited for Qingyan not to come for a long time, worried that Qingyan was in trouble, and was about to lead people into the enemy's camp to burn the granary, but suddenly a long dragon with torches lit up around the valley, and the sound of war drums shook the sky. The army surrounded the valley—it turned out that the Emperor of Heaven determined that this was the location of the enemy's camp by researching the captured map.

There was no suspense in this siege. The prince returned to the army. According to the strategy given by Qi Jia before, he ordered to disarm and not kill. Word spread in the camp that the prince's army had attacked and surrounded him unexpectedly, and the morale of the army was broken. After not much struggle, most of the opponent's 20 troops surrendered.

Qingyan and Qi Jia also finally walked out of the camp and pleaded guilty to the prince, saying that the King of Southwest had been killed in the war and was not captured alive. I'm glad you're fine and it's too late, so how can I blame you!"

"The war in the southwest is finally over," said the Heavenly Emperor, who was sitting in a wheelchair.

"Yes, it's finally over. It would be great if there were no more wars in the world." The prince let go of Qingyan, looking at the barracks that were extremely busy because of the capture of prisoners.

"His Royal Highness, you will definitely be a wise king in the future." Qingyan knelt down on one knee and said, "Brother Huang will be emperor in the future, can you grant me a request?"

"Tell me, as long as I can do it, I will satisfy you." The prince said, "Get up and talk."

"Imperial brother, I only hope that after the emperor becomes emperor in the future, the system of the Sangong and Six Courts can be abolished. Don't let other women live up to their years and lives because of jealousy or so-called political marriages. My mother and concubine, just An ordinary court lady, although she was made a concubine, her life was not happy until she died. For her sake, and for countless future concubines in the harem to be liberated from this fate,

The younger brother begged the emperor to abolish the harem! "Qing Yan said.

"Qingyan, although the rules of the Sangong and Sixth Courtyard are handed down from the ancestors, I don't think it is impossible to do your request. I promise you, in this life, if I don't love someone, I will never accept it. Concubine! I will not allow women to step into the tragedy of competing for favor in the harem again. From the beginning, future generations of emperors should abide by the system of monogamy and must not overstep!" The prince resolutely said, "You are not joking!!"