moon illusion

Qi Fengyao buried his face in his palms, shrugged his shoulders, but didn't make any sound.

It was as if he was burdened with great pain, but he gritted his teeth and refused to admit defeat.

Yun Zaiye patted him on the back lightly, as if to comfort him.

Qi Fengyao's mood gradually stabilized, and he wiped it with his hands indiscriminately, showing an embarrassed smile.

"I'm sorry, I talked too much, I couldn't hold back when I came to the hospital."

"It's okay, the night is long, and I'd love to hear your stories through it."

In the inpatient department in the middle of the night, no one passed by in the corridor, and occasionally family members who accompanied the bed would come out to get some air.

After the voice fell, the whole air became cold again, and fell into a silence.

Yun Zaiye didn't speak again, as if he was waiting for the other party to speak first.

This silence lasted for a long time, Qi Fengyao opened his mouth many times, but did not make any sound.

It wasn't until Yun Zaye's eyelids began to fight that Qi Fengyao opened his mouth.

"When I was young, I was in the fifth and sixth grades of elementary school. There was not much homework at that time. I went to my grandmother's house to do my homework every day after school. Sometimes it was earlier, and sometimes it was very late. But no matter sooner or later, my parents got off work. They will come to grandma's house to pick me up later."

"I think I can take good care of myself, but my grandma has always been worried about me. In the winter morning, the dawn is too late, and it is still dark when I go to class. Grandma will leave me at her house the day before. Bring your homework and schoolbag, wait for me at the gate of my community, and then send me to school."

"This situation lasted for a while, and one day I was almost late, before grandma came over."

"I stood downstairs in my house and kept looking at the small side door. I remember it very clearly. It was very late that day, and there were no street lights in the community. I just took advantage of the not so bright sky and tried my best to look at Over there by the little door."

"When I was most anxious, I saw a lot of people, densely packed and dark, walking fast, as if they were going to go to work. I guessed that grandma was coming soon, and she was among the group of people."

"But soon, I discovered the problem. Because of those densely packed people, no matter how hard I squinted my eyes, I couldn't see their faces clearly. It seemed to be just a lot of shadows, pushing and shoving over there. And separated It’s not far, but none of them came or left.”

"Later, I waited for my grandma, who was already late. But I still didn't go to school that day. Grandma said that it was because of the cold wind blowing for too long, so I inevitably had a high fever, so I asked for leave and didn't go."

"Later, I thought about what I saw that day. After all, I have been there for so many days, and I have never seen people go to work in groups so early. But later, grandma passed away. Her memory became less and less, and I gradually forgot about it."

"It's because of you that I think about it again. Because I haven't looked forward to anyone's arrival so much except grandma."

With a "boom", a corner of Yun Zaiye's heart collapsed.

With just one sentence, the wall he built with great difficulty was shattered, directly hitting the softest part of his heart.

There was another endless silence, both waiting for the other to say something first.

Suddenly, Yun Zaye stood up, bowed his head and said, "I'm going to check on the drip and urine bag."

Then he pushed the door open and went in, closing the door of the ward.

The back is flustered, a little bit like fleeing.

Yun Zaiye did not expect that Qi Fengyao would tell him this, to be more precise, he did not expect that Qi Fengyao would say the last sentence.

He was already blaming himself and feeling guilty, because of such a sentence, he was immediately defeated.

The drip went very slowly, and the urine bag was just changed an hour ago.With such a lame excuse, only I would be so nervous in front of Qi Fengyao, panicking at the intersection and saying nothing.

He didn't go in, but leaned against the thin door panel, letting the cold door panel cool down his soaring body temperature.

He didn't want to wait, he really wanted Qi Fengyao to understand his intentions, and wanted to tell him that he never gave up on him.

But he didn't remember, obviously he had given up on him once.

Qi Fengyao sat on the bench for a long time, a little absent-minded.

What drew him back from his thoughts was the low sound of the door opening.

The next moment, Yun Zaiye sat back beside him, as if he never left.

Fortunately, this time, Yun Zaiye didn't make him wait too long.

His voice was a little hoarse, sounding deep and pitiful.

"I don't know what's on your mind, but I want you to know what's on my mind. I noticed you the first time I met you in a bar. Later, I received your message to take you to the hospital and see if you were unconscious. When I woke up, I was a person who was particularly afraid of trouble, and suddenly wanted to take care of you for a long time, and was troubled by you for a long time. But I have never dared to speak, because your always indifferent attitude makes me not sure about your intentions. "

"I'm afraid that I will scare you if I am too abrupt, and I am afraid that I will miss you if I am obedient. I don't know how to treat you, it seems that nothing is right..."

Speaking of this, Yun Zaiye suddenly shook his head and laughed.

Like regret, but also like self-deprecating.

Qi Fengyao knew what he should say.

But he didn't dare to speak.

It's not that I don't want to, but I dare not.He has been looking forward to the current relationship for a long time, but he still dare not accept it frankly.He always felt that he needed to worry about something, but seeing that there was no one around him, he didn't know what to worry about.

Was he afraid that Yun Zaiye didn't like him enough, that Yun Zaiye was just a whim, that the two of them wouldn't last long, or that he wasn't ready for it?

In fact, he hasn't figured it out yet. What he has been worrying about is that there is a four-year gap between him and his relationship.

That is the distance that they can't catch up to no matter what, and the gap that they can't fill.

He doesn't like to make promises, and he doesn't like to say things under oath.Because he understands that he can't guarantee anything, and the trajectory of life development will not follow his wishes.

After a long time, he opened his mouth to ask a question, but it was already another topic.

"when will your semester start?"

Yun Zaiye was still waiting for his answer, he obviously didn't expect the question to come so suddenly, he turned his head and was stunned.

"There are two more weeks."

"Yun Zaiye, do you think our long-distance relationship separated by mountains and oceans can bear fruit?"

Leaving aside the attitude of Yun Zaiye's parents, just the time difference between different places is enough to make this relationship precarious.

Only then did Yun Zaiye realize that he had taken it for granted.

His smooth life made him a little paralyzed, he subconsciously thought that he could get what he wanted, it was just a matter of time, it was just a matter of whether he should work hard to grasp it.

But feelings are different. It doesn't depend on whether two people work hard or not to become indestructible.

"Then... what do you mean?" Yun Zaiye looked at Qi Fengyao, trying to get an answer.

"I mean, half a month is actually enough. I don't want to and will not give you any promises. I can only take one step at a time."

"it is good."

Early the next morning, the doctor came and removed the monitoring equipment. After the examination, it was confirmed that there was no major problem, but it would take a while to be hospitalized.

Without the shackles of the equipment, Mr. Yun does not need to be tied to the bed and taken care of 24 hours a day.

After Yun Zaiye said hello, he changed shifts with his mother who came with breakfast, and left the hospital with Qi Fengyao.

"what do you want to eat?"

Yun Zaiye held the steering wheel and turned to look at Qi Fengyao.

"I didn't think about it... I was so sleepy that I wanted to sleep, and I didn't want to eat."

"How about some porridge?"

"It's all right..."

After leaving the hospital, people's mental state seems to be relaxed.Before Qi Fengyao finished speaking, he leaned on the seat and fell asleep.

When he woke up again, Qi Fengyao didn't know how long he had slept, and he was still in the car when he opened his eyes, but the seat was turned down, and Yun Zaye was sitting next to him.

Hearing the movement, Yun Zaiye put away his phone and turned his head.

"woke up?"

"Well, why didn't you call me?"

"Is there anything else?"

"...That's not true."

Yun Zaiye laughed, and said in a low voice, "Then it's okay, I just want to stay with you for a while."

After breakfast, the two went back to their respective houses, opened the door and went straight to the bed, threw off the quilt and fell asleep.

In the afternoon, Yun Zaiye got up and washed up, and was going to visit the company.

Although he is not very proficient in the business, but he has a quick mind. Secretary Chen can explain it a little bit, but he can understand it pretty well.

When I got home at night, my mother had already returned.

After the two chatted for a while, Yun Zaiye took out his mobile phone to book a flight ticket.

The TV was neither low nor high, neither loud nor attractive.

Suddenly, Mrs. Yun said, "When are you leaving?"

"Two weeks later, Sunday's air ticket."

Mrs. Yun thought for a while, "The doctor said that your father is recovering well and can be discharged from the hospital next week. That child... is Xiaoyao. Let's forget about him last time, so let's call him home for dinner?"

Hearing what his mother said, Yun Zaiye smiled, "Okay, then I will contact him later."

Back in the bedroom, Yun Zaiye turned on the computer and continued to modify the materials.Father is not in the company, and many affairs need to be resolved by himself.

It was close to twelve o'clock before Yun Zaiye raised his head from the computer, tilted his neck back, and stretched.

He took the phone and looked at it, there was a WeChat message, it was Qi Fengyao's kid.

Click to open the dialog.

Yaoyao kid: Have you rested yet?

Yun Zaye: Not yet, just changed the material, what's the matter?

Probably Qi Fengyao had been holding the phone all the time, and the message came back quickly.

Little friend Yaoyao: It’s okay, I just want to have a conversation with you.

After confirming that the relationship is good, Qi Fengyao seems to have changed a bit, talking more to himself, as if expressing trust.

Yun Zaye: I'm going to be fine now, what do you want to talk about?

Yaoyao kid: It’s all right, first tell me do you miss me?

It took a while for Qi Fengyao to receive Yun Zaiye's reply.

Yun·Jingui·Young Master: Of course I miss you, coincidentally my parents also miss you.