deep hypnosis

Fan Yizhou sat in front of the monitor, took a deep breath of cigarettes, and the two men on the screen were walking out of the ward and asking the doctor something.The slightly thin man's face was full of clouds, and the tall man next to him gently shook his hand behind his back.

After the two left, Fan Yizhou stubbed out the cigarette, and the people around him immediately stood up and followed him out.

"Trouble you every time." Entering the elevator, the man said with a polite smile.

"You don't need to be hypocritical." Fan Yizhou strode out of the elevator with a sullen face, wishing he could get rid of the people behind him.

If it weren't for the woman in the nursing home who refused to come forward, he wouldn't have to rely on the relationship of his old colleague to send her in.After all, there is the most professional treatment here, and he can still see him in this name.

The man following behind just smiled, not caring about this level of disgust. As far as he is concerned, as long as he can achieve his goal, he can accept any grievance, let alone being stabbed.

The doctor seen earlier in the surveillance was already standing in the lobby waiting for them. After exchanging pleasantries with Fan Yizhou, he swiped his card and politely led them in.

It was this seemingly endless corridor filled with the smell of disinfectant water.The last time I came back was half a year ago, and the last time I came back was a year ago. I don’t know when the next time will be.But Xie Jintian has a dark expectation in his heart, and only at such a time can he justifiably see the person he misses day and night.

The fluttering white coat finally stopped in front of a certain ward, but Fan Yizhou also stopped.

"You're not going in?"

"Hurry up." Fan Yizhou said "tsk" impatiently.

Hearing what he said, the doctor knocked on the door: "Yang Yang, look who's here?"

The sliding door was opened, and a young man was seen kneeling beside the bed and drawing.The bed was too soft, a magazine was placed under the head, and he was tracing it stroke by stroke, as if that was his whole world.The sun shines on his back through the closed windows, the fluffy light is warm and peaceful.

Hearing the movement, he raised his head, and when he realized that it was Xie Jintian, his eyes lit up instantly.

Xie Jintian was knocked back half a step by the force of the rushing force, managed to stabilize his figure, hesitated for a while, just stroked his soft hair: "Such a big man, aren't you ashamed?"

What answered him was a rubbing movement as if flattering him and hands tightly wrapped around his waist.

"Did you take your medicine obediently these days?"

After hearing this, the smile of the person in his arms immediately collapsed, and he raised his face to beg for mercy: "Bitter."

Listening to the slightly coquettish tone outside, Fan Yizhou only felt pain in his heart.Whenever Yi Yang fell ill, he plunged headlong into the fantasy he created, regressing into a childlike way to reject all the realities that did not meet his expectations.He would say "don't remember" to Fan Yizhou with a blank face, stare at Xia Xue and say "my sister is so beautiful", and completely ignore Xiao Mu and Cheng Yan who came to visit, but only shouted to see him, the "President" "Brother who is on a business trip", and only this "brother" can persuade him to take medicine obediently and cooperate with treatment peacefully.

"Dad, go ahead, I'll talk to Yang Yang for a while." Xie Jintian said to the attending doctor who was assigned the role of "Xie Chenggang" by Yi Yang.

When the door closed behind him, the indifference on Xie Jintian's face instantly collapsed, he couldn't wait to hug Yi Yang into his arms, buried his face in his neck, and sniffed the long-lost breath fiercely.

It's shameful, but he's been looking forward to this moment every second of his life.

Every time Yi Yang gets sick, it means that the difficult days of not seeing each other are temporarily over, and he can appear on the stage he created with the false identity he granted.In this repeated plot, he is his favorite brother, he is his most gentle brother.They love each other deeply, more than lovers.

"I miss you, miss you very much..." Xie Jintian closed his eyes, feeling that the person in his arms had lost weight again, and his hands were tight.

Yi Yang didn't answer, just immersed in the tenderness at this moment, healing himself.

He didn't understand why he had to take medicine, as if every time he saw his brother, he was coaxing him to take medicine.But he was absolutely unwilling, he didn't think he was sick, but he knew that not long after taking the medicine, everyone he cared about would leave.This time, I don't know when we will meet again.

They kept this posture for a long time, until Yi Yang suddenly remembered his painting, and happily ran to the bedside to show it to Xie Jintian.Xie Jintian hadn't recovered from the feeling of loss, and after a while, he shifted his gaze from Yi Yang's face to the painting.

The painting is a courtyard. Through the round door opening, one can see three people sitting in the open hall, and there are a few chubby cats squatting at their feet.

"Who is this?"

"dad."

"what about this?"

"elder brother!"

"Playing chess?"

"Yeah!" Yi Yang looked at the painting beside Xie Jintian.

"What about this? Is it you?" Xie Jintian pointed to a villain lying on the edge of the chessboard. He had no facial features, and only made a few sketches. "What are you doing?"

"sleep."

"We play chess, you sleep?"

"Yeah." Yi Yang picked up the painting with a smile and looked at it carefully, "When you are awake, I will sleep in peace."

"What about when you wake up?" Xie Jintian pretended to ask casually.

"I'm awake..." Yi Yang's gaze dimmed suddenly, "I'm awake, and you will all be gone."

Yes, he almost forgot.No wonder he was tricked into taking medicine. After taking the medicine, he became groggy, and when he woke up, he felt nothing.There is no father, no brother, no cat, no warm home, and even himself does not exist.

"Why aren't you here?" Xie Jintian couldn't help but hugged Yi Yang, who was secretly distressed, into his arms, and tried to suppress his emotions, "At least I'm always here, always guarding you."

As long as you look back, as long as you speak casually.

Yi Yang stared blankly at the snow-white bed, as if he couldn't hear Xie Jintian's words at all.After a while, he suddenly pushed Xie Jintian away, grabbed the painting, crumpled it up, and threw it towards the window.The window was closed, and the ball of paper hit the glass and bounced back to the feet, rolled twice, and died completely.

Yi Yang stared at the ball of paper, tears came down suddenly.

This is a cage, and no matter how you modify it, it's still just a cage.

Xie Jintian froze, and hurriedly wiped his tears, his heart ached beyond measure: "How can you just cry?"

Yi Yang just shed tears, but didn't make a sound. He opened his eyes and stared blankly out of the window, as if he could see through the layers of dreams how the pale reality gradually overwhelmed his defenses.He is powerless to resist its going, just as he is powerless to resist its coming.

And these people, these people who he thinks of, are nothing but accomplices and accomplices of this force majeure.

When the tears were all gone, he closed his eyes and said slowly: "I will take medicine, you can go."

At this moment, Xie Jintian almost thought that Yi Yang had woken up.

He walked around to Yi Yang in fear, half-kneeling, put his hands on his knees, looked into his eyes in a humble gesture, and said word by word: "Go, where can I go? It's always with you It’s tethered here. Whatever role you arrange, come and go as you call, I’m willing to guard.”

Xie Jintian originally wanted to say "forever", but none of the "forever" he promised Yi Yang has been fulfilled.

Yi Yang looked at Xie Jintian, his eyes were suspicious and indifferent, but he smiled again in an instant: "Brother, didn't you eat it? I made fish-flavored shredded pork for you!"

After speaking, he ran to the bedside table and brought a disposable empty bowl, walked two steps and leaned over to touch something: "I'll give it to you when we finish eating. The dishes are all salty, so it's not good."

Xie Jintian watched the empty plastic bowl being handed to him, and felt that the glaring whiteness, the bed sheet, and the airtight surrounding wall had deliberately surrounded them.Let them fend for themselves here.

He couldn't stay for a second, afraid that he would lose control, or go crazy together.

He got up, squeezed out a smile and said, "Brother still has something to do, I'll come see you in a few days."

When he walked to the door in a few steps, he heard Yi Yang, who had never moved, whispered: "Okay, I'll wait for you in the pavilion."

pavilion?Where is there a pavilion?

Xie Jintian resisted not looking back, opened the door and walked out.

The attending doctor was waiting by the door, while Fan Yizhou was standing at the end of the corridor.He didn't want to listen to their conversation, and he didn't want to see Xie Jintian's distraught appearance every time he walked out.It reminded him of his old self.

After Xie Jintian adjusted his mood, he walked to Fan Yizhou's side and thanked him again.

"There's nothing to thank, anyway, he won't remember in a few days."

Drinking poison to quench thirst, both of them knew.After fully waking up, I will sink all the obsessed desires in the subconscious under the iceberg, waiting for the repeated outbreak and loss of control.

"It's a blessing that he can give me the opportunity to suffer some torture."

Compared with what Yi Yang endured before, this little pain is simply insignificant.At least he still has him in his heart, no matter what kind of emotion prevails, it is worth his joy.

Xie Jintian was holding the piece of paper he stole in his hand, as if he had returned to his childhood.When he was a child, he accidentally put away the painting in the wastebasket, but he didn't know that it contained the guilt that entangled him all his life.

In the past two years, he has cleaned the house where Yi Yang was born from time to time, and moved those old things to his newly bought villa little by little.

Half of the photo wall is a photo of him secretly taken by Yi Yang, and the other half is a photo of Yi Yang secretly taken by him.There were two rusty tin boxes on a wooden shelf by the wall.A black cat with a red thread tied around its neck was sleeping soundly on the "Outline of National History".

On the thick carpet, two cats, one white and one floral, dozed off in the fluffy sunlight, turning over comfortably, revealing their snow-white bellies.

In the study is the old bookcase that Xie Chenggang made himself, with the karate certificates of the two of them and a group photo of the two families hanging beside it.The garden models carefully protected by glass covers are displayed on several wooden boards opposite.The loquat garden that was once smashed was placed in the front, and there were several lifelike ceramic cats lying in it.

Xie Jintian owed a huge debt for this house and had to pay it back for most of his life, but he didn't feel bitter.

He often looked around the still empty house, waiting for the person who pretended to be asleep who would never wake up.

Maybe he will never come here in his life, or maybe he will walk in the next second, smiling, vaguely young.

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The author has something to say: a paragraph was added at the end of the last chapter, please read it again, Sao Rui

It's finally over, thank you for your continued support.

Many times the cause of mental illness is the suppression of the subconscious mind. Yi Yang will never be able to forgive Xie Jintian. His self-esteem does not allow it, nor does his past, but in the end, he still has him in his heart.

As for Xie Jintian, I think the biggest punishment for him is seeing his beloved become uncontrollable from time to time, and he can only play the role of an older brother with him occasionally.Even in Yi Yang's delusion, they can't be together in the name of love after all.