lost summer

In the next few days, being bored at home, I went to Yuncheng's house twice more.Every time after lunch, when grandpa takes a nap, I don’t have the habit of taking a nap, and I often run out to play alone at that time.Walking on the road with strong sunlight, the thin figures make me feel that the world is mine.

For the first time, Yuncheng sat beside me intimately and told me stories.I slid off the pillow and laid my head on him.I felt the ups and downs of his chest due to the heartbeat, as if I had returned to the summer night of my childhood. I lay on my father's body and felt the warmth he brought me.The second time, I ate at Uncle Yuncheng's house and went upstairs to his room with him. This time he sat beside me more intimately, held my neck, and told me a book My favorite fairy tale book.This time, when he was lying with me, he couldn't help touching my cock through my pants, and his hands moved back and forth on my body, caressing.I grabbed his arm, looked up at his face, and said with a smile, "Uncle, I'm so itchy." He grabbed my hand instead, and said in a low voice, "Don't move around, it's more itchy."

I shrank back as if tempting him, giggled like a silver bell, and lay in his arms, not speaking anymore.

As long as I lie in his arms, I feel warm, as if I have returned to the time when I was a baby, lying in the arms of my parents, my heart is full of satisfaction and security.Since my parents left me, to be honest, I haven't adjusted very well.I think of myself as an insecure child who needs to be cared for, and now, this feeling is even stronger.

Standing on the dividing line between childhood and adolescence, I sometimes feel that such days will be long and eternity, until the end of life.Teenagers never have to worry and be afraid of growing up,

"Xiaohe, will uncle take you out to play?" He suddenly said to me.

I took him away from my arm, turned around and said to him, "Okay, get up quickly."

I got out of bed, put on my shoes, and walked to the door.Yun Cheng said: "You wait a while, I'll get something."

"Bring what?" I said, walking to his side.He pulled out a camera from a drawer of the cabinet opposite the bed.My eyes fell on the camera he was holding in his hand.It was a very new 120 camera, with a black appearance and a delicate structure, it looked very delicate, and it was hard to put it down.

The two of us walked downstairs together. In the yard, I said to him: "Uncle, can you give me your camera to play with?"

He laughed, looked down at me and said, "Can you use it?"

I immediately said: "Yes, yes, I have used my father's camera before."

"Really?" He said, handing me the camera.

I took the camera carefully, turned over it, and held it tightly to my chest.I walked to the side of the manjusawa that was blooming by the path in the yard, bent down, pointed the camera at a blooming red flower, and pressed the door.

Manzhushahua, also known as the other shore flower.When I was young, I read the "Preface to the Lotus Sutra". The scripture said: "The Buddha has spoken this sutra. He sits in lotus position and enters the samadhi of immeasurable righteousness. Hemandalahua, Manzhushahua, Mahamanzhushahua, scattered on the Buddha, and all the people.” It is said that it is the flower that grows on the boundary between the living world and the dead world——the flower of the Santu River .It is said that the fragrance of flowers has magical power and can evoke the memory of the deceased. This flower only blooms in Huangquan, and it is the only scenery on Huangquan Road.

Aging and death are too far away from me at this time.Therefore, the scene of large expanses of Bana flowers blooming along the Santu River is always just a fantasy in my heart.

"where are we going?"

"On the park square," he finally told me.

"Uncle, you are here, wait, I'll go back and get something!" I said.

"Take what?"

As I ran towards the road, I turned my head and said to him, "Kite! I'll go home and get a kite, and I'll be back soon."

I came home panting and saw my grandpa still taking a nap there.I went back to the room, squatted down and took out my kite that had been lying down for a long time from the drawer, ecstatically.I held the kite tightly, left the house, ran back to the original place, and saw Yuncheng was waiting for me there.

"Uncle, let's go fly a kite, while it's still windy today. I haven't flown this kite for a long time..." I said.

He told me to turn around.I turned around obediently, and he looked at my back and said, "Look, you've been sweating profusely in just a short while."

I smiled embarrassedly, and he said, "Let uncle help you carry your kite."

I "hmm" and handed him the kite in my hand.He held it in his hand, looked at it, and said, "It's so beautiful."

"My mother made it for me!" I said, "When I was young, she liked me very much. She took me to play, wove clothes for me, made kites for me, and she also made my schoolbag for me."

"Your mother's hands are really skillful." Yun Cheng said.

Ten minutes later, we came to that square.It is now approaching the afternoon, and the weather is not as hot as noon.Walking in the shade of the trees beside the square, gusts of wind blew away a lot of the sweltering heat.I looked up at the sky, and it was pure blue, with only a few white clouds floating like strands of silk.

My kite-flying technique is still very good, even if I haven't let it go for a long time.I held the bobbin, carefully put the line, and turned my head to watch the kite gradually rise, flying higher and higher, then stopped, turned my body upside down and looked up at the smaller and smaller kite.My kite is in the shape of a bird, it is my sustenance of freedom, flying in the vast and boundless world.

I saw Yuncheng standing not far from me and taking pictures of me with the camera. His posture for taking pictures is very professional, and his movements still look like my father.In fact, in my eyes at that time, any middle-aged man I had a crush on was like my father.

I put it on for a long time, until my hands felt a little sore, I walked up to Yuncheng, raised my head and said to him, "Uncle, come and try."

"Okay." He took my spool of thread, looked at the sky, and pulled the thread carefully.

"Uncle, did you say the kite is free?" I asked.

"Not free," he replied.

"But it can fly higher than us," I said.

He paused, then said: "The kite is not completely free, it has a thread. It is a puppet of man, at the mercy of man. The apparent freedom is actually just an appearance. This lack of freedom is even more painful, because this It's false freedom."

"True freedom is a kite with a broken string." He said, reaching into his pocket with one hand, and took out a small travel knife from it.

"Can I cut it?" He held his blade to the kite string, looked me in the eyes, and asked for my opinion.

"But, this is a kite my mother made for me..." I hesitated.

I thought about what Yuncheng said in my mind, and finally, I said: "Okay. Let it be free, and we will go home."

He stroked the line with a knife, and there was a soft "pop", and the line of the kite broke.

Strangely, at this time, the wind suddenly picked up.I watched the kite get smaller and smaller and disappear into the sky.

I grabbed Yuncheng's arm and said with a smile, "It's free."

I don't know why, but I feel better without the kite.In a daze, I remembered a line of poetry: "Duckweed has no roots at all, so don't ask me when you are a wanderer at the end of the world." Life is like floating duckweed.People will never have long-term stability. No matter how much you miss a place, you will eventually flow elsewhere.Yuncheng said that people also have complete freedom like a kite with a broken string, but I don’t think that counts. People are actually puppets of time.

Yuncheng and I played here for a long time, walking from the lake to the flower bed, just like those men and women who secretly dated with my friends before.I haven't had this kind of happiness for a long time, especially in the past two years.It makes me feel as if I have returned to the situation when I was five or six years old.When we left there, we asked someone to take a picture of us. At that time, we stood side by side, and he put a hand on my shoulder lightly.My body trembled slightly like an electric shock. At that moment, I suddenly had a strong feeling, which I had never felt before.I think I'm in love with him.

After the photos were developed, he sent me one, which is the one we took together.At that time, I was sitting with him in the beautiful swing chair in his garden, and he gently put his arms around me.I looked up and saw the white sunlight leaking from the leaves, shining on my immature and clean face.The world became transparent, like a huge green crystal, gently wrapped me in it.