Wife, I'm afraid of blood

"Reached?"

"Just arrived."

"Walk carefully, and watch out for cars when crossing the road."

Listening to the words on the other end of the phone, Xiang Qingyao laughed and said, "It's over, do you think I'm a three-year-old?"

"I think you are not as good as a three-year-old child," Zhou Zhen muttered softly.

"What did you say?"

"It's nothing. Remember to report your safety when you get home. I have something to do here, so let's not talk about it." After speaking, he hung up the phone before Xiang Qingyao exploded.

Zhou Zhen helped Xiang Qingyao to take a week's vacation, saying that she would go home and rest for a few days.Xiang Qingyao didn't try to be brave, but staying at home, looking at the couple's daily necessities, and the pajamas that the other party forgot to bring when they left, and they were still on the bed, Xiang Qingyao really couldn't persuade Calm yourself down. City X had nowhere to go, so he took advantage of this time to go back to City H.

Xiang Qingyao arrived home just in time for dinner. Standing in the garden downstairs, the smell of food from every household wafted from the old residential building. It rained the night before in City H, and the uneven concrete floor was filled with muddy water. Xiang Qingyao directly picked up the box and walked into the house on the southernmost side.

"Yaoyao?"

Mother Xiang was still holding a steaming spatula in her left hand, she reached out and wiped the apron at her waist indiscriminately, and took the box from Xiang Qingyao's hand.

"You kid, you don't know how to say when you come back, so I can go shopping."

Hearing this, Xiang Qingyao turned her head to look at the kitchen. It seemed that she was just in time for lunch, but the cabbage in the pot was probably left over from yesterday.

"I told you, it's not good for your health to eat less of this kind of overnight food."

Mother Xiang stir-fried it a few more times with a shovel, and poured it into a plate beside her, "I live alone, so I don't need to be so particular about it, it would be a waste if I don't eat it."

Xiang Qingyao knew that the elders were used to thrift, so she didn't waste any more words.

"Why are you back at this time?" Mother Xiang asked while giving her some vegetables.

"I'm on vacation for the past few days, so I just want to come back to rest." Xiang Qingyao took out the words he had prepared early in the morning.

"Alright, you have worked hard in the hospital every day, so you should take a good rest for a few days when you go home."

Xiang Qingyao hummed, put a piece of ribs into the other's bowl, and said hesitantly, "Aunt Zheng and the others..."

"Are you still having nightmares now?"

Xiang Qingyao immediately denied it. She lied to her mother that she had been cured, but in fact she had been tormented by nightmares for the past few years.

Mother Xiang breathed a sigh of relief, "It's good that you can let go of that matter. Aunt Zheng and the others have never blamed you."

"Take some time, buy some fruit and go see them, it's not easy for them to be an old couple."

Xiang Qingyao nodded. In fact, she came back this time to visit Xiao Mengqi's parents.

The next day, Xiang Qingyao went to the market early to buy some seasonal fruits, and brought the sausage that Xiang's mother made herself, ready to go to Xiao Mengqi's house.

Xiao Mengqi's mother is a middle school music teacher, and her father opened a calligraphy training class nearby. Under the influence of her parents, Xiao Mengqi developed a strong interest in Chinese painting since she was a child, and she was admitted to X City Academy of Fine Arts without disappointing her expectations.

It stands to reason that she should graduate from university smoothly, then go abroad for further studies, develop towards the path she dreamed of, and then arrange a long-awaited art exhibition.A beautiful person like her should also have such a beautiful life, who would have thought...

Xiang Qingyao once again got on the bus that she had taken countless times in the past, and walked on that road that she had traveled so many times.

She may not have seen Xiao Mengqi's parents for a long time. The last time she went to the cemetery happened to meet the old couple.

"Aunt Zheng."

Xiang Qingyao bowed slightly, and then passed the things in his hand to the other party.

The old couple probably didn't expect Xiang Qingyao to come, they were stunned for a moment, and then warmly greeted her to sit on the sofa.

Xiang Qingyao stayed at Xiao Mengqi's house all morning, and the old couple wanted to keep her for lunch, but Xiang Qingyao tactfully declined on the grounds that her mother was still waiting for her at home.

After leaving, she went straight into a flower shop not far away and bought a bunch of pink baby's breath.

About four to ten minutes later, the taxi came to the westernmost cemetery in H City.

Xiang Qingyao was holding a bouquet of pink baby's breath, which seemed out of place among the white flowers in the hands of the people around her.

After walking down the stairs for another 10 minutes, she took out the prepared wet tissue and wiped off the dust on the tombstone meticulously. In the black and white photo, Xiao Mengqi still had that sweet smile on her face. Pulled out a new paper towel and wiped the location of the photo again.

She put the flowers in her hand aside, and sat on the small steps in front with her knees bent, just like she had done for so many years.

"I'm sorry." This was also the first sentence she said every time she came to see her.

Ever since Xiao Mengqi lost her sight in the car accident, she began to condemn herself like this, until finally Xiao Mengqi ended her life, and she also pushed herself into the abyss of self-blame.

Before returning to H city, Xiang Qingyao made another trip to Dr. Cheng's place.

……

"Xiao Mengqi has been gone for so many years, maybe you don't have any consciousness, but as your psychiatrist, in my opinion, your guilt for her has long surpassed your love for her. Or to put it more absolutely , The reason why you never forget her is not because of your love for her, but because of the self-blame you imposed on yourself."

……

It was also because of Dr. Cheng's words that Xiang Qingyao began to re-examine her feelings for Xiao Mengqi, which was also a major reason why she decided to return to H City.

"By the way, I don't even know when you wrote this letter." Xiang Qingyao took out a kraft paper envelope with moldy corners from her pocket, and carefully took out the letter paper inside. Perhaps it was damp, and the ink on the paper had already faded, but the content on it could still be vaguely read.

Xiang Qingyao found this letter in Xiao Mengqi's room this morning. The box was locked. The old couple probably didn't know the password, so they left it there. Xiang Qingyao opened it and saw the letter.

This was left by Xiao Mengqi. The characters on it were of different sizes and crooked. If she hadn't read the content, Xiang Qingyao wouldn't even be able to believe that it was written by her.Later, I thought, maybe she wrote it after she lost her eyesight.

Xiang Qingyao read it again, and she could feel Xiao Mengqi's helplessness and fear between the lines.She hated herself, her parents, everything in this world, and even more her dreams.But she really couldn't bear such a self, such a self who couldn't even lift a paintbrush.

"I can't continue to live with myself like this. Painting is all I have. I really can't imagine how I will spend the rest of my long life like this. I'm sorry, I can't respond to you again I love you, I know I am selfish, you will meet a girl who is better than me and loves you more than me. None of this is your fault, this is the path I chose. If one day in the future, someone When such a girl who loves you appears, you must firmly hold her hand."

After reading, Xiang Qingyao looked up at a cloud in the sky, suppressed all the heat in her eyes, and then slowly exhaled a foul breath.

She suddenly let go, no matter whether it was Xiao Mengqi herself, or her parents and friends, no one attributed the accident to her.From the beginning to the end, it was because of her love for Xiao Mengqi that she felt guilty. After a long time, even her initial love became deformed and turned into a nightmare that trapped her for seven years.

Over the years, the ineffectiveness of psychotherapy also stems from the fact that I have never let go of my heart.The appearance of Qi Qi can be said to divert her love to a certain extent.She loves Qi Qi, far surpassing her feelings for Xiao Mengqi.

Let it go, finally let it go completely.

"I met a girl." Xiang Qingyao rubbed the ring lightly, her voice subconsciously softened, "She is very similar to you, but she is really different."

"Compared to you, she is very lively and has many friends around her. But when I first met her, she blushed when she saw me. I thought she was a shy person like you. As a result, I ran to school secretly once. Looking at her, I realized that she is only like that in front of me."

"Isn't she cute?" The corner of Xiang Qingyao's mouth curled up, and she continued: "I admit that I thought of you the first time I saw her, but later, I gradually only saw her."

"You know, when I first met her, I saw her every time in the hospital..."

……

"It's back, why is it so late? I'll heat up the food for you."

"No need." Xiang Qingyao took off his coat and hung it on the shelf in the entrance, saying, "I've eaten."

Xiang Qingyao saw that her mother was wearing presbyopic glasses, and there was a wooden box on the coffee table, as if she was rummaging for something.

"Oh, the street said to fill in a form and ask for a photo ID. I remembered that there were some left before, so I wanted to look through them."

After Xiang's mother finished speaking, she continued to take out the photo album from the box and put it on the coffee table. Xiang Qingyao picked up one. If she remembered correctly, it should contain photos of her when she was a child.

Most of them were photos taken when she was still in City C. After coming to City H, she gradually lost contact with her friends in City C, and she didn't like taking pictures anymore.

She still remembers that she loved to run to the neighbor's house at that time, because the sweet and sour pork ribs made by the neighbor's aunt were very delicious.

In the photo, she was grabbing the last piece of ribs on the plate with the neighbor's child. The photo was taken at a glance, and their faces were a little out of focus, but she vaguely felt that the little girl on the opposite side looked familiar.

"Mom, do you still remember what our neighbor's last name was?"

"Neighbor?" Mother Xiang hissed, and turned her head to look at the photo.

"Ah, is it the family you like to run there when you have nothing to do?"

"That's the one."

"The family name is Qi."

The author has something to say: the fate that was formed 20 years ago, if it hadn’t been for the old Xiang to move later, maybe the story would have become a childhood sweetheart, and the baby kissed (not

感谢在2020-04-2823:54:38~2020-04-2922:00:59期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel who threw the landmine: Nezha makes trouble at sea and I make trouble at others. 1;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!