there are wolves

What Zhan Jing said about riding two laps is too deceptive. Not counting the trip, she has been riding for nearly two hours, and this woman is full of energy, and she is getting more and more courageous as she fights tirelessly.

Luo Xunyi took her to the provincial road and got off the car, letting her fly around on the road alone on a motorcycle.

Luo Xunyi sat on the fence by the side of the road and looked at the endless wheat fields in front of him. This year's autumn wheat is growing well, and the landlords are probably going to distribute it.

Zhan mirrored like a female ghost and flew back and forth behind him a few times, Luo Xunyi glanced back at her, frowned slightly, opened his mouth to say something, but the words stopped coming out of his mouth The desire, like conceiving a sentence in his mind and then pushing it to his mouth, has already racked his brains and exhausted him.

On the way here, he held on to the handlebar and wanted to drive endlessly like this, not because he yearned so much for the distance. To be honest, he had no desire to know the scenery ahead. He just ...I want to continue in that state.

At the critical moment, Zhan Jing kept making noises asking him to stop the car.

So he gave the motorcycle to the little girl whom he met for the first time, and sat on the road guardrail, quietly looking at the wheat field not far away in a daze, without moving for a long time.

Fortunately, Zhan Jing knew how to restrain himself, and stopped before using up the remaining half of the tank.

"Hey"

Zhan Jing straddled his long legs, sat down beside him, spread his legs carelessly like a boy, and put his hand on his left shoulder.

Luo Xunyi propped her forehead and closed her eyes, and let out a muffled hum.

"Why? Do you feel sorry for your motorcycle?"

Seeing that he was depressed, Zhan Jing wanted to make him laugh.

Luo Xunyi tugged at the corner of her lips to save face, and her facial expression quickly returned to calm.

At this time, the sky has completely darkened, and the fiery red sun in the west is sinking into the horizon inch by inch, and the darkness is gradually spreading from the sky like a big net.

Zhan Jing glanced at his school uniform, took out a cigarette from his pocket and lit it between his fingers. He was also a skilled smoker.

"Are you from the attached middle school?"

Zhan Jing exhaled a thick white smoke and asked him.

Luo Xunyi didn't answer her. It can be said that she completely ignored her. She just propped her forehead and closed her eyes, not knowing what she was thinking. ..Yu Wangran expected it well, he is really fickle, he can even be said to be split, he can seamlessly switch between every state, see people change into people, encounter ghosts into ghosts, like every Luo Xun Every memory is a mask, and it seems that every Luo Xunyi is himself.

True or false, it is a headache.

"I often walk around in the attached middle school, but I haven't seen you"

Zhan Jing seemed to be trying to get him to talk, seeing that he was ignoring her, she moved closer to him.

Luo Xunyi opened his eyelids for a long time, hummed lightly, took out the phone from his pocket, propped his forehead with one hand and pressed the phone with the other. Like a skeleton that only lost its eyes, it was dark and dull.

"Are you my age? Eighteen? Nineteen?"

"......nineteen"

"Aha, call me sister, I'm 21"

Luo Xunyi finally raised his eyes to look at her, said nothing, then looked down at his phone.

"I stopped going to school when I was 14"

Zhan Jing's arms were bare, and the evening wind would inevitably feel cool on her skin. She shrunk her shoulders slightly, removed the cigarette from the corner of her lips, narrowed her left eye and pointed a 'hole' at the rising half moon, and said Calm as if telling someone else's story.

"I'm not a material for studying. I know very well that my parents don't care about me. Anyway, there is my elder brother. They value sons over daughters and raise me like a wild boy. I have been herding sheep since I was a child. My elder brother is promising and young. Young and successful, the second-level inspector of the anti-smuggling police, they don’t care about me, hoo... I don’t care, I’m not angry, I really don’t care, anyway, there are few people in this world who I care about.”

Zhan Jing paused while speaking, let go of the cigarette butt between her fingers, and let the little spark fall freely. When the starlight went out, she shrugged her shoulders and smiled, then turned to look at Luo Xunyi and said: "Can you see it?"

"......what?"

"I have depression"

In the middle of writing a text message, Luo Xunyi had to stop and looked up at her.

Zhan Jing's bangs were played back and forth by the evening wind, covering her eyes, only the corners of her lips were drawn deeply to the sides, and she smiled very touchingly.

"I got depression when I was 15 years old. I discovered it myself. I don't need to see a doctor. You are unhappy, don't you know it? It's a heart disease. There is no medicine and no psychiatrist. A psychiatrist, I can only remind you again and again that you are sick, your heart is sick, your brain is sick, you are abnormal, so I will not go to the doctor, my brother asked me to go and I did not go, and now he basically does not What do you do with me?"

Luo Xunyi's phone was hot in his palm, he looked at her eyes hidden behind bangs, and asked inexplicably, "How is it?"

What's even more strange is that Zhan Jing actually understood what he was asking, shrugged his shoulders and looked indifferent: "That's it, it's not very serious if it happens from time to time, otherwise I wouldn't sit here and chat with you , I was sent to a mental hospital a long time ago, that is... every once in a while, I will be very sad, lonely, lonely, wanting to be noticed but afraid of being watched... During that time in my life Nothing, just like being locked in a dark room with no doors and no windows, nothing but darkness, very lonely, very lonely, suffocating, and refusing to get out of that dark room, the whole world is against you It's white noise to me, they're going to laugh at me, they're going to hurt me, they're going to try to kill me, so I'm just... far away, alone"

"Are you excited once in a while?"

"I'm not happy, I'm not happy, why am I excited? It's not because I've taken drugs"

"...Is it bad to take medicine?"

"I don't take drugs to keep myself awake, only sedatives are needed when the beast is crazy"

Zhan Jing's eyes lit up, and he put his left hand on the back of his hand on the guardrail: "Can you understand that feeling? Not being recognized, not accepted, despising yourself, despising the whole world, they treat you as a patient , as a different kind, unwilling to get close to you, unwilling to believe you, when you ask them for help, they still feel that you are acting, very helpless and helpless”

Zhan Jing crossed his legs, looked up at the stars, hummed a messy tune, and didn't know what response he would get from what he said, suddenly smiled and said: "The weather forecast says there will be rain tomorrow, bah, I think it's nonsense , there are so many stars tonight, so it won't rain"

A truck drove up on the highway, and the strong flashlight hit Luo Xunyi's face, causing him to close his eyes and turn his head to avoid the light source.

Gently pulling out her hand, Luo Xunyi reedited the unfinished text message——sorry, I have something to do on the weekend, so I can't participate in your activities, have fun.

After hesitating again and again, he still sent this text message. He jumped to the ground while leaning on the railing, and walked towards the motorcycle parked on the opposite side of the road: "I'm going back."

Zhan Jing called him, "Hey, Luo Xunyi"

Luo Xunyi stood in the middle of the road, looking back at her.

"You have no friends, do you?"

Zhan Jing asked with a smile.

Luo Xun was silent.

"I don't have any friends either, how about making friends?"

Luo Xunyi was silent for a long time, and then showed a very faint smile: "Okay."