Deep jungle routines[E-sports]

The wind was very strong, and it hurt a bit bitterly on the face.

Liao Yi looked at Rong Ling suddenly: "What did you just say?"

"I said, we can't go on like this."

"Ah?" Liao Yi's voice was trembling, and he smiled anxiously, "I don't quite understand what you said... By the way, your cigarette... I'm sorry, I will return it to you. I will never..."

"That's not it."

"...What is that? What did you mean by what you just said?" Liao Yi's voice trembled slightly.

"That's what you heard." Rong Ling took back the cigarette that was about to burn Liao Yi's fingers, threw it on the ground, and stepped on it. He looked down at the ground and brewed himself for a whole night and then a whole day. The words came out slowly, "I've thought about it, it's better to be an ordinary teammate."

"……why?"

"It's not your problem...it's me, it's my problem." Rong Ling looked at his fingertips, recalling the feeling of scarlet warm liquid pouring out of Liao Yi's arm and then flowing over his fingers, he tried to make himself The voice continued to remain calm: "You didn't know it before, but you should know everything this time. I have never had a father since I was a child, and my mother... It's the same as if I didn't. Later, my mother died. I never told you before. , In fact, I am quite inferior in front of you."

Liao Yi wanted to speak, but Rong Ling waved his hand: "You let me speak."

"Liao Yi, this is the situation in my family. My mother is an idiot, idiots don't know...she doesn't know how to teach children. I haven't learned from her since I was a child, what is like, what is love..." Rong Ling After a pause, "Does my dad love her? Maybe, I don't know. If he loves her, why would he let her live alone with me in that kind of place? A child without a dad, a woman without a husband , Anyone can bully anyone. Those men who bully my mother, they like her?...It shouldn't be true. If they like it, they won't spoil her, and they won't let other people spoil her...then they like their own mother-in-law? In the face of my mother-in-law, my mother?"

Liao Yi stared at Rong Ling who was wrapped in confusion and sadness, his heart ached a little bit, every word Rong Ling uttered was like a needle piercing his heart.He wanted to yell and tell Rong Ling to stop, begging him to stop talking...

"I don't understand, really. I can't figure out whether I like it or not." Rong Ling frowned and shook his head.

"I like you. You just need to know that I like you." Liao Yi pulled Rong Ling's hand, gently grasped his fingertips, looked up at him sadly.

Rong Ling withdrew his hand and touched Liao Yi's face.

"I know. You've said it to me many times. You said it last time, and you'll repeat it next time, lest I forget...it's so long-winded."

"Then..." Liao Yi's voice was hoarse, and he asked cautiously at the beginning, but couldn't continue.

"I'm sorry, Liao Yi. I tried..." Rong Ling looked at Liao Yi's eyes, which were always bright, and now they were covered with a layer of mist.He forced himself to let go, and quietly clenched his fists beside him, "But I don't find anything I like about you."

Liao Yi opened his eyes wide, his mind went blank.

With countless sharp thorns in that sentence, it directly pierced into his heart, and he stirred it hard before pulling it out.

Bloody.

The pain caused Liao Yi to bend down, panting silently with his mouth open, and it took him a long time to hold back a word: "What about him?"

"Who?"

With red eyes, Liao Yi looked up at Rong Ling and said the man's name.

"You said just now that you are here with me..." Liao Yi's voice trembled violently, and he choked up, "I didn't find the feeling of liking. What about him? You treat him...you like him...don't you?"

Before Rong Ling's eyes, he saw the mouse across the room and smashed into pieces in front of him.The white fragments lay quietly on the ground, the reflected light made his eyes hurt and his nose sore.

"No." Rong Ling said again, "No, I don't like him. I never treat him like you think."

He told Liao Yi that he was looking up at that person, watching his back step by step to today.

"...He is my belief. I aspire to be him, no, I want to try to surpass him. But I never thought of getting him," Rong Ling frowned forcefully, "He is a legend. Legends shouldn't be belong to anyone."

"Why?" Liao Yi hugged Rong Ling with one hand, buried his face on his back, panting heavily: "Why can't I...I like you...more than anyone else...Why can't... ..."

I like you so much.

Why can't you like me too?

Liao Yi suppressed the choked sobs of grievance and pain lingering in his ears, such childish words made Rong Ling want to laugh, but he really couldn't.He had to raise his head vigorously and stare at the sky with his eyes wide open, so that he could barely suppress the soreness rushing from his nose to his forehead.

"sorry."

He had to mumble the same sentence over and over again.

I am sorry.

Liao Yi, I made you feel uncomfortable.

I am sorry.

You became like this because of me.

I am sorry.

I can't give you what you want.

I hurt you, I'm really sorry.

There were too many words of apology, which surged in my chest countless times, but I didn't say it in the end.

Rong Ling raised his hand and patted Liao Yi's back lightly.

"...You should find a better person to like. That person will like you as much as you, and that person will not make you so sad or painful."

"No! I don't!" Liao Yi grabbed Rong Ling's arm and shouted in a muffled voice, "I don't like others, I only like you!"

Rong Ling ignored him, and continued on his own: "At least that person is clean, unlike me... I am dirty."

dirty.

Rong Ling had said this word several times before, but Liao Yi didn't take it seriously before.He suddenly thought of something, couldn't help shivering, and slowly raised his head inch by inch.

Rong Ling lowered his head and leaned close to Liao Yi's ear, his voice seemed to come from far away: "... How old was I then? Five years old? Six years old? I don't remember. No one cut my hair, The clothes I wore didn't fit well, and the man who came to bully my mother didn't see her, he saw me. He came to tear my clothes, pressed me and wanted to bully me... I'm so scared, Liao Yi, I'm so scared. Kicking him desperately, shouting desperately. The man strangled my neck, I couldn't breathe, I felt like I was really going to die, the stench from the man kept coming...I still remember it..."

Liao Yi's lips trembled, he moved, and raised his right hand to cover Rong Ling's mouth.

"Stop talking... Ling, I beg you..." Tears flowed down Liao Yi's face, he stared at the smile on Rong Ling's lips in pain, "Stop talking... I don't want to hear it! "

"The man ripped off my clothes, saw that I had that, he was startled, called me a pervert, kicked me to the corner, beat me hard... the stick used to beat me was broken... …They said that my mother had been slept by many men, and that my mother was dirty." Rong Ling was trembling all over, he pulled Liao Yi's hand, and smiled bitterly, "I was almost treated as a girl and slept with someone... "

"I'm afraid that people will touch me. As soon as people get close to me, I will think of the man's eyes and the smell on his body. The disgusting stench has stained me, and others will smell it...they will know me It's dirty..." Rong Ling repeated hoarsely, "I'm dirty."

"Not dirty! You are not dirty at all!" Liao Yi bit his lip, tears rushed out of his eyes, he held Rong Ling's face, stroked his temples, pressed his jaw hard, and shouted under his throat: "Rong Ling Zero! I forbid you to say that about yourself!"

"It doesn't matter. Whether others say it or not, I'm already like this." Rong Ling's voice was shattered by the wind, "People like me... are not worthy of your liking. You see, I have lost my father since I was a child. Mom is also dead, and anyone who has anything to do with me will be unlucky. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be hurt. Liao Yi, really, you deserve someone better, better than me, cleaner than me, and you won't be unlucky As soon as I saw you, a voice shouted in my ear, telling me not to forget how dirty I am."

Liao Yi's hand on Rong Ling's arm suddenly tightened, his mind buzzed, and only one thought remained... Is it because of me, I made Rong Ling suffer so much?

Gritting his teeth, he pushed Liao Yi away with an unbelievable face. Rong Ling's eyes were flushed, and he said in a trembling voice, "Liao Yi, I'm sorry. Please... Please don't like me anymore, okay?"

"I want to forget about those painful things... I want to play games and play professionally... It's hard for me to get rid of the past... Please let me go."

The wind is so cold.

Blowing on the body, even the joints of the bones were frozen.

The wound on Liao Yi's left arm started to hurt, and the chill crawled to his heart along the wound and blood vessels.

It hurts.

From childhood to adulthood, as long as he shows a little sad look, everyone will care about him, spoil him, and let him.

Why is Rong Ling still not soft-hearted when he is in such pain?

Liao Yi thought puzzled and aggrieved.

No matter how hard I tried, I tried my best to shorten the distance between the two of them, trying to tie them together... Rong Ling was still indifferent.

Calm as if the whole world had nothing to do with him.

Liao Yi suddenly hated Rong Ling's tranquility.

He wanted to tear off Rong Ling's calm mask, take a look at his heart, and see if this person's heart was made of iron.

How can you be so cruel to yourself again and again?

"No." Liao Yi stared at Rong Ling, gritted his teeth and said, "I don't."

He stubbornly avoided the hand that Rong Ling stretched out.

"I won't break up."

Liao Yi stood up with difficulty, his body swayed, and he stood upright with his knees propped up.

Turning his head and coughing a few times, he pointed at Rong Ling: "Other things... I am willing to give it to you as long as you want, but this is not allowed! Rong Ling, I disagree, did you hear me? I, no, separate!"

Rong Ling frowned: "Liao Yi, don't say stupid things."

"I'm not kidding!"

"...You make me very embarrassed." Rong Ling sighed.

Liao Yi's eyes seemed to want to eat people.

"Then bear with it!" He yelled, turned his head and wiped his face, "I'm going back."

* *

Liao Yi fell ill and collapsed as soon as he got back to the base.Had a high fever in the middle of the night, swayed, and talked nonsense.There was no one in the base, so Rong Ling half dragged him to the hospital, where he stayed overnight in the emergency ward.

The transparent liquid slowly flowed into Liao Yi's body along the thin tube, Rong Ling moved the chair, he stepped forward to touch it carefully, Liao Yi's hand was cold.

Rong Ling frowned, looked left and right, moved the chair forward a little bit, took a few breaths into the palm of his hand, and gently covered Liao Yi's hand for infusion.

This is the first time Liao Yi has been sick?

Rong Ling couldn't remember.

It seems that after meeting him, Liao Yi always gets sick.Fever, cold, cough... take turns.

Also injured.

The white edge of the gauze was exposed from Liao Yi's neckline, and the thread at the edge was raised up, sticking stubbornly.

Rong Ling wanted to pull back the end of the thread, but his fingertips accidentally brushed across the collarbone.

In his sleep, Liao Yi frowned uncomfortably: "Zero..."

Rong Ling held his breath and kept leaning forward, not daring to move.

Liao Yi didn't wake up, his eyebrows frowned even tighter, his head rubbed against the pillow, the corners of his mouth stretched, like a smile that didn't fully bloom in time.

"...I like...Rong Ling...don't go...don't want me..."

His nose was so sore, Rong Ling slowly lowered his head, and pressed his eyes on the quilt on Liao Yi's chest.

Leaves a faint wet mark.

The author has something to say: Yesterday a little angel criticized me

let me hold my tongue before sprinkling sugar

ok... ok, i dare not make a sound

Slipped away

-----------

In view of the fact that the small theater evoked the cheerful laughter of the little angels 233333

The author learns from the pain

decided to delete it

Restore the serious style of painting in this chapter (beat)