[Comprehensive British and American] Bat Parenting Encyclopedia

Three shifts

Tony, Jason, Tim and the others didn't know at this time that the outside of the five-dimensional space and the few people surrounding them had also become a mess.

Compared with the Avengers, which lost only Iron Man among its members, and Doctor Strange and Black Widow suddenly became mysterious, another superhero group, the Justice League, is obviously a little bit worse.

After all, even their space base was quarantined and sealed off—it was basically equivalent to a three-day shutdown for repairs.

Both Captain America Steve Rogers and Superman Clark Kent felt from clues that their respective alliances were being shrouded in an unexplainable and uncapturable strangeness.

Captain America couldn't get in touch with Iron Man, and Superman suddenly realized that among the few members of the Batman who had always been the backbone of the alliance when it was in crisis and the workload was the greatest, two of them had lost in vain.

It can only be "attributed" to the red Robin Tim Drake, who is indispensable in both the Wayne Group and the Justice League, is too capable, and almost one person can be a project team.

And when Superman mentioned Tim and Jason's disappearance to Bruce in the alliance communicator, he only got clear confusion and obvious dark circles from the tired old father who was busy with the baby.

It seems... Bruce really doesn't know the whereabouts of his two sons?

Clark wisely shut up. In order not to add stress and trouble to his tired old father, he casually made up a lame excuse, such as why the two of them contacted Diana or something...

As usual, this totally flimsy excuse wouldn't fool even Barry, let alone Batman, who reasonably doubts everything.

But now in the confined space of the watchtower, without the help of an artificial intelligence nanny, Bruce, who is being tormented into a trance by his daughter who doesn't sleep all day, actually... didn't get too entangled with Clark's rhetoric...

After all, "sleep deprivation" is also an effective international torture that breaks through the psychological defense of prisoners. Although Bruce is not afraid of this kind of torture at all, broken and irregular rest will affect the brain's ability to think after all.

As the continuous dark knight and President Wayne, Bruce has extraordinary endurance and mental strength. In fact, he doesn't really need sleep. As long as he can guarantee a few hours of efficient deep sleep, he can lift the spirit of the whole day and night. Analyzing clues, beating up criminals, and reviewing company financial reports, the body and mind are never at odds.

But this time it was different. He never expected that after taking care of the baby "full-time" on the watchtower, he couldn't even guarantee An Xinxin's peaceful sleep for a few hours...

Usually, when Bruce puts his daughter to sleep, he is almost awake, and when he cultivates sleep again, and just enters a deep rest, the little guy wakes up again...

Bats are so desperate...

To Hal Jordan?

The test pilot in the chic world doesn't know anything about coaxing babies, let alone experience.

In particular, Hal showed the article on the tablet about crying immunity to the heavy dark circles of the two old fathers, "See how easy it is to write about these sleep training, once the door is closed and the earplugs are on, let them cry , cry and fall asleep."

Bruce & Oliver: "..."

The little guy was crying with his eyes closed, sleepy and sleepy, so pitiful and helpless. For the first time, Batman realized that he was a person who was so soft-hearted that he couldn't even hear a baby cry.

Oliver didn't even think about it: "My nanny encouraged me to try it, but..." Oliver sighed helplessly, "Connor cried himself out, refused to sleep, and almost suffocated..."

The scene of the child lying down and gulping milk in the surveillance, even thinking about it now, makes Oliver shudder, so he can only willingly fall into the vortex of coaxing him to sleep.

Hal: "..."

It seems that Little Connor is a guy with a lot of backbone.

Another worrisome problem is that there is no crib in the watchtower. In order to prevent two small groups who are obsessed with turning over and can turn over 360 degrees from falling off the bed, the three big men directly laid a climbing mat on the ground. Hitting the ground floor—and thinking that I simply couldn't be more creative.

Raising children is so stressful.

And Hal Jordan swears that if only his light ring had electricity, he would directly make a crib and make an automatic bassinet!

Dark Batman & Green Arrow: Hehe.

But you don't have electricity...

What's the use of saying this?

Seriously, you OA little blue people, do you want to consider doing a hardware upgrade for the lamp ring?Like extending battery life? ! !

What about those two kids coaxing them to sleep together?The two old fathers separate one person to watch, and the other person can rest, so-called shared childcare.

However, this is just a beautiful fantasy.

The reality is that two babies...will only interfere with each other when they are together. One who finally falls asleep is woken up by the other who refuses to sleep, which is nothing more than a normal day.

After just two and a half days of being a "full-time dad", President Wayne couldn't help but reflect on how hard life is for the tens of thousands of female employees in his group because of his painful personal experience. The group president who empathized with him decided to extend paid maternity leave for them.

At this time, less than 12 hours are left before the isolation and blockade of the watchtower is lifted. Clark decided not to bother him with the mysterious whereabouts of Bruce's two sons for the time being. Time to deal with it.

The changes in these three days also caused the Wayne Group, Stark Industries, and Lex Enterprises to have varying degrees of chaos.

Bruce Wayne, missed the on-site signing ceremony of a large-scale acquisition that was extremely concerned by the media, and even the agent Timothy Drake could not attend.

Lucius Fox, who is familiar with the routine, commanded the public relations department and explained to the media that it was an injury caused by extreme sports. The people who eat melons have long been used to this.

As for Tim?

"Collapsed due to overwork" is also the predictable ending of "the adopted son squeezed by the flower company Bruce Wayne"...

Tony Stark's public relations department also reacted quickly under the wisdom of Pepper. Regarding the fact that his chairman hadn't made any headline photos for three days, the announcement to the troublemakers on the Internet was——Director Stark The elder came to have a son, and he attached great importance to it, and he was accompanying his wife to rest at home.

The time for resting the body can be long or short, which provides sufficient time flexibility for the search for Tony.

Pepper, who was unfortunately affected by the public relations announcement, was also forced to stay at home, but she has already noticed that Tony is missing, and she can't continue to work with peace of mind. It is better to use all available resources to find Tony at home.

Comparing these two presidents who are either a powerful CEO or a good wife, Lex Luthor, who has always been very high-profile and used to monopolizing power, does not have such good luck.

As for the fact that the president's Twitter has not made any comments against Superman for three consecutive days, the Twitter account that used to be one per hour has not been updated for as long as 72 hours, and the public relations department has not even given an explanation.

The public relations department is very innocent. They don't have much authority, and now they don't dare to talk nonsense. No one is willing to take this responsibility.

Mr. Luthor has no hobby of extreme sports, no wife and children, and he has never been obsessed with women, busy with dating and disregarding business.

It can't be explained that the president's mobile phone is disconnected from the Internet.

And because Clark was busy dealing with the league's isolation affairs, he didn't have time to take care of the already quiet Twitter account.

This account was requested by Bruce, in order to stand up to Lex's daily smearing of Superman. In the Internet age, Superman naturally needs public opinion management.Bruce's plan is to find a professional to take care of it, but Clark thinks this is deceiving, and the young people with honest and beautiful qualities naturally disagree.

However, Superman is not professional in Internet marketing, and he doesn't bother to manipulate public opinion. Therefore, the official Twitter named Superman has a weird style of painting.

—— Either take a picture of the blue sky, white clouds and flying birds, or take a picture of flowers and plants under the microcosm, with a famous quote produced by the well-read reporter Clark.

——It is full of the style of "time is quiet and beautiful" that makes 60-year-old aunts can't help but click Like.

Although Clark's daily Twitter content is quite boring, it is Superman's official account after all, and the number of followers ranks among the top ten on Twitter all year round. Therefore, Superman's official account has no new news for three days, which is naturally enough to attract the attention of good people.

So a very imaginative CP fan enthusiastically answered a question about "Is President Luthor missing and why hasn't he posted on Twitter for almost three days?"

——I went on a space date with Superman.

The gossip heard that the watchtower was closed and cleared, exciting!

Paired with a Superman account that has also been silent for three days, you can play memes!

As a result, the dating news of Superman X Luthor ignited the enthusiasm of people in the United States and even the world, and quickly reached the top of the global Twitter trend...

Clark: "???"

People sit at home, and stems come from heaven.

************************************

The three people trapped in the space base watched this carnival of public opinion full of entertainment spirit through the Internet.

Bruce & Oliver: "..." I sympathize with Mr. Kent, the chairman of the alliance, who is busy with various trivial coordination work, and there is nothing he can do about the wind review being killed.

Hal is different, Hal is hahaha, and logged into his Twitter account to join the heated discussion.

—Is he really bored?

The two months-old babies didn't know what happened. They were full of food and sleep, and they were playing on the climbing mat contentedly. Pacifier, grab the pacifier in the opponent's hand (of course, Baby Helena, who can't crawl at this stage, can only be snatched by Xiao Connor).

It formed a sharp contrast with the old father with dark circles and kidney deficiency who waited on them to sleep.

Bruce is holding a voice changer on the phone with Nick Fury, emphasizing once again that Captain Marvel who has not been checked cannot be returned to Earth, and Oliver, who is watching the baby on the climbing mat, can hear Nick Fury escaping from the receiver An exasperated voice.

With Uncle Oliver's support, baby Helena sat up, wearing a sack-like Union white T-shirt, drooling uncontrollably, and she bent into a real ball from time to time, patting her little feet .

Baby Connor, on the other hand, is wholeheartedly holding the big Batman uniform hood that Bruce has left on the side, swaying, and gnawing on the bat ears on the hood.

The little guy sitting there, just a tiny ball, almost as big as a bat hood—Baby Connor is teething, and there aren't many things that can be used as teethers on the watchtower.

Bruce hung up the phone decisively, ignoring Nick's roar of "Hey Batboy, no one hangs up on me!" on the receiver.

Turning their heads, they met the eyes of Oliver who was yawning. At this moment, they both saw the fatigue in each other's eyes - but they didn't find impatience in these eyes.

For Batman and Green Arrow, two urban vigilantes and busy presidents who have a certain degree of similarity, these three days are a rare time for them to be able to accompany their children wholeheartedly without any worries.

Their willingness to hold their baby to bed is actually tacit, unspoken compensation—they’re not sure how long they’ll be with the baby.

Protecting the city and the world is their promise to their dead parents and themselves, and they cannot give up easily.

It is said that many parents will unconsciously desire to make up for their regrets and shortcomings in the process of growing up in the process of raising children.

For example, if I myself grew up in a scarcity environment, I will try to give the best to my children regardless of investment;

For another example, those who have not received higher education due to various reasons will strongly urge their children to go to university;

The regret of not having orthodontics when I was young, I would like to make up for it in my own children.

Childhood affects our whole life in all aspects, big and small, and those who can break through this limitation can already become brave.

As for the Wayne and Quinn families, who were extremely rich in childhood education and material conditions, Bruce and Oliver naturally did not have such regrets.

What they lack is companionship, and this is what they are most worried about and afraid of now—every time they think that their children will also experience the childhood nightmare of experiencing their father's death because of the career chosen by their elders, and feel the pain in that crime alley. The 8-year-old boy, who was hoarse and boundless, made Bruce's heart ache.

Bruce never expected him to die well, and now he has lived longer than his father, which is something he could never have imagined.

However, death in most cases is not within the individual's control.

He suddenly realized that he seemed to have never had similar worries with Damian—his son, when he came to him, was already a rebellious teenager.

Although bloodthirsty and cruel, it makes people worry, but no one can deny his excellence and independence.

With a ten-year-old body, the maturity of his soul is comparable to that of a 70-year-old retired university professor. He has also seen (even made) many deaths, so Bruce naturally did not think about these things that Damian would definitely sneer at. topic.

But Helena is different, she is just a naive and lovely baby, a cup of warm milk can make her smile happily.

This has nothing to do with gender. Raising a baby from an early age is completely different from directly accepting a 10-year-old child.

He thought he'd always remember her as a little ball, with her little fleshy hands and feet, and he wondered if he'd be one of those stupid old fathers who, even when Helena was an adult, he'd always think she was just a child .

Such a little angel, if he is gone...

Suddenly, parenting Batman has a soft spot.

It is impossible for Oliver to understand what Bruce is thinking when he frowns and stares at the baby again. The two share the same hidden worries, but he doesn't know how to comfort his old friend, because Green Arrow hasn't figured out what to do. Do.

Both of them faced the crimes in the city because of their parents' accidents, put on uniforms, made promises, and embarked on the road of fighting crime.

But do they want to bring the same shadow to their children?

This is such a helpless cycle.

Thinking of this, Oliver also suddenly became sad. He sighed, "Teaching children how to face death is probably one of the most complicated tasks for us in the future."

Neither of them noticed that Hal Jordan, who had been sitting in front of the big screen in the watchtower and clacking on the keyboard, hadn't made a sound for a while, and at this moment he spoke suddenly, and his words still maintained a playful banter.

"God, you guys are too deep," he yawned half-truly, stretched and stood up, "I'm going to bed."

Neither Bruce nor Oliver points out the reality that Hal is actually just waking up.

Then it suddenly occurred to them that Hal also lost his father in childhood.But slightly different from Oliver and Bruce, Hal's pilot father died during the test flight - a plane carrying Martin Jordan, facing the morning sun, took off under the eyes of the young boy looking forward to and admiring , but crashed under his helpless gaze.

The light in the boy's eyes went out together with the flames of the plane's explosion.

Who can deny that Hal's avoidance of intimacy and his indifference to the universe are also related to his past experience?

A father is a mountain. When this mountain falls, the sheltered children will inevitably experience a psychological collapse.

Whether life can be rebuilt on the collapsed ruins is a topic worth discussing.

Oliver and Bruce dropped the subject tacitly - they didn't want to talk in the first place.

Time walked in silence, and the last few hours were spent quickly while changing diapers, breastfeeding, and sleeping. In the middle, Bruce still tenaciously saw the needles, sorting out the logs of the watchtower for the past few days, and coordinating and contacting the space members of the Avengers. .

Finally, when the time came when the quarantine was automatically lifted, the three adults who breathed a sigh of relief were about to tidy up a bit, and brought their embarrassed self and baby back to the earth through teleportation, but they never thought that Superman would come first.

And without using teleportation, Clark flew directly into space by himself—wearing a plaid shirt and jeans, carrying a large bag of diapers in one hand, and a few small bottles of liquid milk in the other, stuffed in the pockets of his jeans. Two small clothes.

Relying on the superman's biological force field to keep the normal state of these earth objects in space.

"Hey, Bruce, Oliver," Clark, who entered the watchtower, showed a gentle smile to the three of them, "I'm afraid the children will be hungry."

Oliver didn't know Bruce's reaction. For the first time, he understood the people's worship of Superman-the son of Krypton was powerful, but at the same time full of the most delicate compassion and love.

He flew into space and delivered diapers and a change of clothes for the baby.

Rescue him and Bruce who are smelly and milky.

However, the brains of the alliance still looked serious, and Oliver could only replace Bruce with a warm hug to Clark, expressing his heartfelt thanks.

Oliver didn't know how moved Bruce was, until the silent Batman dropped a bomb-like invitation——

"Clark, are you willing to be Helena's godfather?"

Oliver, who was changing the clothes of the two babies, paused, okay Bruce, I know you are very touched...

Clark's shock was palpable. "Me? Can I, Bruce?"

Two big men stood facing each other, tall and straight, with four eyes facing each other, one looked solemn and slightly nervous, the other looked surprised and expectant, even clutching his chest, his expression concealed some honor...

Even Hal can see the weirdness of this scene, making a ceremony to recognize the godfather look like a marriage proposal scene.

Too basic, you restrain yourself.