Perpetrator

After a rainy afternoon, the air carried a damp smell, and there was a little water on the ground, so it was inevitable that the uppers would get wet while walking.

Shao Li raised his collar to prevent the early autumn cool wind from pouring into his neckline. The bad weather was not suitable for walking, but he just wanted to walk aimlessly like this, thinking that doing so seemed to make his depressed mood better.

I hate crowded places, and I hate crowded public transportation even more, and the cars parked in the community are like decorations, which have not been touched for many years.

He couldn't remember the reason, but instinctively flinched from that car.Fear, rejection, and unexplainable palpitations made him not even want to see that car.But whenever it comes to selling it, there is always some inexplicable reluctance in my heart.

Maybe I should buy a bicycle, it will save some effort than walking around.

It was countless times that he opened the bag to check whether the drawings inside were safe. Shao Li took a deep breath, suppressed his nervousness, and walked into the publishing house as if he had made up his mind.

When the editor looked at him in surprise and nodded his head and said that this work was very interesting, Shao Li felt that his heartbeat had almost stopped, and he even suspected that he had auditory hallucinations.

Really... is it ok?

How long, how long?Being rejected again and again, being told euphemistically again and again that he has no talent in this area, he has long been used to failure, this time, can he really succeed?

Wanting to laugh, his facial muscles stretched out uncontrollably, and he didn't even have a chance to pretend to be calm. He was almost jumping for joy, but followed by a lot of uneasiness that lingered in his heart.

In the face of the editor's inquiry, he didn't know how to explain the source of inspiration for this work. Every picture, every line of dialogue, and even every expression came from the nightmare that had haunted him for many years, a nightmare that he couldn't get rid of. , are as painful as suffocating, like tearing open an old wound.

As if he could fully integrate into the plot, Shao Li kept thinking about the mood and state of mind of the protagonist, as well as the important supporting character whose face could never be seen clearly. On the drawing paper, that face was always skipped as a shadow or blank .

What were these dreams telling him?Or is it not a dream, but just falling into a world of my own making?Or an event that actually happened somewhere?

My God, this anxious feeling is about to drive him crazy. Every time he wakes up from a dream, he can't even clearly judge which is a dream and which is real. It is not until he sees the messy sketches on the desktop that he feels that he has finally come out of the dream. relief.

As expected, although the storyline has been approved by the editor, but the content is full of violence, blood and dark emotions, it is not suitable for publication as a written book, and you can try to publish it on an online platform.

There is nothing wrong with this, as long as he can return to his peak period, he will not miss any opportunity. In this era, there are far more online readers than physical book consumers.

After hastily signing the contract, Shao Li fled in a panic from the place that made him restless.The streets were crowded with pedestrians, and he dodged in horror. Everyone who passed by looked as stiff and fake as wearing a mask. He suddenly felt that these creatures were very strange.

Maybe...the whole world is strange.

Fine raindrops fell from the gray-black sky again, the wet hair tips were pressed against the cheeks, and the clothes wrapped around the body were very uncomfortable. Why is this drenched sticky feeling so familiar?Let this flustered beating heart become more exhausted.

After rushing into the house and turning on the warm air in all the rooms, Shao Li pulled off his wet and cold clothes and completely soaked himself in the bathtub filled with hot water.

The moment he was surrounded by warmth, he not only failed to calm down, but became even more flustered to the point that his breathing became short of breath. Too many messy pictures flashed in his mind, but none of them stopped for a while.

Shao Li closed his eyes and leaned back on the edge of the bathtub. He was curious and fearful at the same time. What he was curious about was who the person in the picture was and what he or they were doing. Whenever the picture was frozen at a certain moment, he would unconsciously Distract yourself by thinking about other things.

That's right, he was afraid to see everything in the picture clearly, and instinct told him that maybe it would be better not to see clearly.

He didn't remember where the tiny scar on his forehead came from, he only knew that the moment he saw the scar, his heart would prick, and full of regret wrapped around his heart like a thorn.

But... why?

He doesn’t want to draw the character who never shows his face in the comics, and he can’t draw it. That face is like a lock that blocks memory. In the dark, it seems that once he thinks of that face, everything will go back to the worst. The starting point, once out of control.

Can't remember, don't remember.

Randomly wiping off the water drops hanging on his body, Shao Li tiredly climbed onto the big soft bed, rolled himself tightly under the quilt, and looked at the desk not far away, where the neatly arranged drawings were thickly stacked on the Together.

How long will the dream last?

The story of countless nightmares has not yet been completed. He needs an ending, but he doesn't know what the ending will be. He has imagined countless possibilities, but none of them can fill the void in his heart.

He has never been so eager for a nightmare to come, longing for that dream to give him an absolutely shocking ending.

The manga trailer has already started to be publicized on the Internet. Just the cover and introduction have already attracted the attention of many people. Shao Li enjoys the feeling of being expected and being needed by unknown people in the world.

Go to sleep, go to sleep!How do you dream if you don't fall asleep?It's been a week, it's been a full week!Because of fear and anxiety, this week I either painted all night or lay in bed with my eyes open until dawn. The deeper the night, the clearer my head becomes, and the more intense the sense of isolation from the world.

It felt terrible, and maybe those dreams that were exhausting him were redemption.

Go to sleep, go to sleep, it doesn't matter if you sleep until the end comes.

Shaking his hands to find the medicine bottle in the drawer, Shao Li swallowed a pill with his head up, and gulped down the cold water in the cup.The clicking sound of the beating second hand was like ants crawling on rough wood, which made the eardrums itch.

It's annoying, and the lights are annoying too. By the way, maybe it's dark enough to fall asleep.

The clock with the battery pulled out, the desk lamp with the power cut off, the sewer filled with clumps, can't sleep, why can't I still fall asleep?

One pill after another, Shao Li couldn't remember exactly how many pills he had swallowed, lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling in the dark, always feeling that it was too bright and disgusting.

Contour lines, colors, and the scenery in the eyes slowly become illusory and chaotic.Fortunately, the effect of the medicine finally started to work, consciousness gradually became a little blurred, and drowsiness struck. This long-lost feeling is so nostalgic.

The phone on the bedside rang suddenly, and Shao Li frowned impatiently. He wanted to reach out to get the phone, but his arm didn't work at all, it just hung limply by his side, unable to move.

He was horrified to find that not only his arms could not move, but his whole body, and his breathing became more and more difficult.

Oh no!Unconsciously overdosing, this is too ironic, maybe tomorrow's urban headlines will have a picture of myself printed on it.Former well-known cartoonist overdosed on lorazepam, suspected suicide?

A mental patient commits suicide. Maybe many people will laugh and talk about it after dinner, and then they will be drowned in hundreds of news that don't know the truth or falsehood.

What an embarrassment.

There was a light click, and then there was a slight noise in the living room, as if someone was deliberately walking lightly and slowly.

A thief?Forget it, it doesn't matter, take what you like, I'm afraid no thief has the leisure to kill a person who seems to be planning to commit suicide.Maybe there's nothing wrong with just dying like this, at least you don't have to experience failure, you don't have to fear nightmares, and you don't have to survive alone. It's really good.

Shao Li slowly closed his eyes, letting his exhausted mind sink into the bottomless abyss.

As the breath weakened to almost disappear, that forgotten day was like the sand on the bottom of the river stirred up by stones, constantly churning to fill the gaps in memory.

The blood-stained hands, the blood-stained hem of the clothes, the intertwined figures, and the invisible but close face.

Who is he?