Not to blame

Mo Xinxu sat in the living room until midnight.No one paid any attention to him, and he didn't think about it at all.Tears kept flowing, silently soaking the cheeks and then dripping quietly.The old tears slowly cool down, and the new tears flow down to cover them.

The back of Mo Xinxu's head ached from crying in the living room. It was the pain of being hit hard on the back of the head with a blunt instrument continuously. The pain was mixed with dizziness, and it hit the whole brain wave after wave.His eyes also hurt, and they were dry and swollen from crying, but the tears still couldn't be restrained and kept flowing.The living room seemed to be short of oxygen, Mo Xinxu was gradually out of breath, and his chest was stuffy.He stood up in a daze, forgot to put on his shoes, and quickly fled the house.

It snowed at night.The streets were brightly lit, and there were still a few couples walking on the road.The flakes of snow are very large, and there is already a lot of snow on the ground.Barefoot and wearing thin clothes, Mo Xinxu ran staggeringly while crying loudly.

Painfully and recklessly.

Pedestrians on the side of the road all cast strange glances at him, as if they were looking at a lunatic.As Mo Xinxu ran, the sharp cold wind in his ear was like small blades standing up, frivolously passing by his ears.His tears were still flowing, and even formed a little frost, which was melted away by new tears.Her cheeks were sore, flooded with tears, and then blown by the wind, the pain was unbearable.

The sound of screaming and wailing while crying, although it was right next to my ears, was so shrill that I didn't even recognize myself.

That little rabbit is called Xiaobai, with a very ordinary name, and looks like an ordinary white rabbit.When Mo Xinxu was looking at rabbits in the pet shop, the owner said that he could hug them one by one. Only Xiao Bai licked his hands with his fleshy little tongue when he picked them up.Xiaobai's stomach is very delicate, he will have loose bowels if he eats vegetables freshly taken out of the refrigerator, and he will vomit if he eats leaves with too many drops of water.When you hold it in your hand, it will look at people with round eyes and a very innocent expression.After eating, he will lick Fenfen's three-petal mouth back and forth with his tongue.The leaves fed to it will be placed in a small plastic plate, and it will lie down on the plate when it is full, with its two long ears pinned behind its back, like two hairpins for no reason.When people pass by, as soon as its ears move, it will hurriedly get up and look out of the cage.Not begging for food, but to get close to people.Even if it is eating, someone passing by it will stop and raise its front paws to look at them.When you touch it, it will relax and lie on its stomach quietly, which looks very comfortable.Xiaobai loves cleanliness very much. He washes his face, paws and ears non-stop every day, and any ear will hang down when he washes it. The appearance of his little paws washing his face is very cute.

And now it's gone.Once Mo Xinxu recalled its empty cage, he couldn't help crying until his whole body trembled like chaff, and his teeth chattered.When he was crying, the cat would come closer and look at him with wide eyes. The cat was not used to seeing him like this.

It would be too cruel to recall how the cat acted like a baby to himself.Mo Xinxu thought, maybe she really committed some crimes and was being punished.Everything he loved was taken away before his eyes, and he could do nothing but push it further and further away with a smile.

Useless self.

Even the ability to please loved ones is lost.

He finally fell on the snow, his face buried in the cold snow water.It is difficult for the brain to think in the low temperature, and Mo Xinxu just thought in the confusion, crying in the melting snow, probably won't be seen?

Chen Yucheng, who was on vacation, went to Zero Bar with Luo Luo as usual.Recalling that he was dragged away by Mo Xinxu when he was too drunk, the bar staff still laughed: "It's the first time I saw you drunk like that. It's really embarrassing for that boy. It's really not easy to drag you around so big."

Chen Yucheng still felt a headache when he thought of the drunken sex.

Luo Luo ordered a glass of Tequila Sunrise, took a selfie with his face, and asked Chen Yucheng, "How are you doing with him?"

"With whom?"

"Mo Xinxu." Luo Luo asked, "Did you get back together?"

"No." Chen Yucheng said in a deep voice, "I want to get back together and he didn't agree."

"Damn, how is it possible? That man likes you so much, what did you say?"

"I said, as long as you still like me, I will break up immediately..."

"Pfft—cough cough cough..." Luo Luo choked so hard that tears were about to come out, "Did you make a fucking mistake? Did you not wake up at that time?"

Chen Yucheng, "..."

"Stupid, are you?" Luo Luo simply hated iron and steel, "If you say that, no one can agree to it. It's like a fucking mistress in the top position. It's weird to agree to it. Damn it's weird, you fucking Didn't you get bitten by a dog at the time? You broke up, you fell in love with someone and went to have sex with someone else, who cares if you break up or not!"

Chen Yucheng, "...then I have to break up first anyway."

"Be quick, don't be stupid and you can't shake it clean. In the future, you will know that pestering is not troublesome enough." Luo Luo looked at Chen Yucheng with a look of looking at his son, "If you fall in love, you will make flowers." Already, are you gays so capable of tossing around?"

Chen Yucheng said awkwardly: "I don't think I'm interested in men, I'm just more interested in him."

"Fuck you, you're showing your affection on my face, you're an idiot if I don't wake you up with a glass of wine." Luo Luo looked disgusted, "I'm really convinced, I've never seen you like this, usually not very Can you be very good at dealing with people? Why, in front of people, you can’t even fart? Can you throw it out at this level?”

Chen Yucheng was embarrassed: "I really didn't expect this. And when I was with Geng Yiyang at that time, I just agreed casually. I didn't know that he would chase after school."

"Anyway, hurry up and cook, lest Night Changmeng really let people go, I'll see what you do."

When Chen Yucheng returned home, it was already night.The light in the room was not turned on, so Chen Yucheng pressed the button to turn on the light, and saw Geng Yiyang nestled on the sofa, staring at the TV wall with his big eyes open like light bulbs.Chen Yucheng asked him: "What are you doing?"

Geng Yiyang didn't turn his head back, "It's okay."

Chen Yucheng hung up his clothes, sat aside, and knocked on the coffee table: "Don't be dazed, come here. Let's talk."

Only then did Geng Yiyang slowly turn his head around and asked him, "What are you talking about?"

"Are you kidding me or deliberately lying to me? Did I tell you not to hide anything from me, don't hide anything from me. How many times have I asked you these days? You can't fucking count it by yourself Right?" Chen Yucheng didn't know how to break up at first, but when he said that his emotions were brought up, he became really angry unconsciously, and even he began to feel that he really couldn't bear it and really wanted a point. Zhi: "Damn it, I've been coaxing you all day long, right? Break up! Whoever loves to coax him a few times will go, I won't serve you anymore!"

"Brother Ze, I didn't do it on purpose, I'm sorry..." Geng Yiyang's voice was crying, "I just think that even if I tell you about my family affairs, you will find it annoying... My dad plans to sever ties with me because he knows I'm gay..."

"Do you think I'll be annoyed? Do you think you're psychic or mind-reading? Are you just so happy to think about me? Find a few excuses, keep it hidden, and let you tell me The flowers are here!" Chen Yucheng became more and more angry as he spoke, he picked up a pillow and threw it at it, "Fart in a different way!"

Geng Yiyang cried, "I don't know, I don't... Brother Ze, please forgive me, I will never dare to do it next time, I will tell you everything..."

"I believe your nonsense." Chen Yucheng sneered.

That night, Chen Yucheng really didn't say a word to Geng Yiyang.At first Geng Yiyang was begging for mercy and apologizing to himself outside the door of his room, but then he gradually said that he was tired and lost his voice, so Chen Yucheng just fell asleep and didn't intend to really bother him.When Chen Yucheng woke up and found no one in the house, he realized that Geng Yiyang had moved away, leaving nothing behind, even the towels, water cups and toothbrushes he bought these days disappeared, as if this person had never been here Same.Chen Yucheng wasn't sad at all, he just felt relieved all of a sudden, he thought, this time he should be qualified to hug Mo Xinxu upright, right?

He should have no reason to reject himself this time, right?

He could hardly wait.

Chen Yucheng washed his face, but still couldn't calm down.He just quarreled with Mo Xinxu a few days ago. Mo Xinxu is a person with a lot of thoughts, and it is easy for him to sleep badly if he thinks about little things over and over again. He will subconsciously force himself to remember until his body is too tired to hold on. until.Chen Yucheng turned on the phone and saw the wallpaper automatically changed by the system, and suddenly remembered that today is Christmas.

Chen Yucheng immediately found the reason to contact Mo Xinxu, without even having time to hesitate, he immediately dialed the phone.

The phone rang for a long time before being picked up, and the system would hang up automatically a few seconds later.Chen Yucheng felt his heart beating hard, he calmed down for a few seconds before he said, "Merry Christmas."

"...Thank you. You too." Mo Xinxu's voice had a strong nasal tone, as if he had caught a cold.Chen Yucheng didn't think much about it, and said: "It's cold, wear more clothes. You've caught a cold."

"En." Mo Xinxu's voice was listless.

Chen Yucheng took a deep breath, "Mo Xinxu."

"……Um."

"I broke up. Can I chase you again now?"

Chen Yucheng's heart was almost in his throat, and he was nervously waiting for the trial.Mo Xinxu seemed to be in a daze for a long time, and he didn't respond for a long time. There was only a noisy background sound, which seemed to be the screaming and crying of children and the scolding of women.

"I'm sorry..." Mo Xinxu's voice gradually became uncontrollable and turned into a soft sob. "Don't like me...don't love me...I've...I've..."

"I've lost all hope..."