[Pride and Prejudice] Becoming Katherine Bennett

The two sat in silence.Darcy lowered his head slightly and said nothing.Catherine stirred the milk tea in the cup with a silver spoon, and the metal occasionally touched the porcelain, making a tinkling sound from time to time, and the noise of pedestrians, carriages and horses outside the window came through the bright glass window.

It seemed, Catherine thought, that such scenes had happened often since they had known each other.Mr. Darcy was serious and reticent, and Catherine was indifferent and quiet, so they were always silent when they met.

But there is also a difference between silence and silence.Sometimes it is shy, sometimes it is overwhelmed, and sometimes love grows wantonly in silence.But there has never been a time like this, when both of them faced each other silently with mixed feelings of contemplation, surprise and pain.

If in the past, Catherine had said too much to Mr. Darcy, she would have made up a few words in a panic, and then turned and left.But this time, Catherine fell into struggle and hesitation, but in the end, she chose to stay where she was without any words or actions.

Compared with Catherine's calmness, Darcy's face was a little pale, and the complex emotions in his heart were clearly visible on his facial features.First regret and pain, now shock, reflection and disbelief, a mess.Darcy looked at the ground, and seemed to be very interested in the floor of Gardner's house.

Before this moment, Darcy had been wondering what he didn't understand about this young lady.What complicated secrets does this young lady with a harmonious family and a simple life experience have?What does he not understand?

Darcy looked up and his eyes fell on Catherine's face.In the past, every time he saw her, he was moved by her charming and charming, thinking that she was the most beautiful flower in the world, the most dazzling Xia.But today, but at this moment, Darcy saw something else fascinating in that young and pretty face.

What exactly it was, Darcy couldn't figure it out either.But he vaguely felt that Catherine was neither Jiaohua nor Hongxia.

"I'm going to make them disappear. I'm not going to be kind like you."

"Do you love the real me? Do you know the real me?"

Catherine's words kept ringing in Darcy's ears alternately, and the appearance of her when she said these words also appeared in her mind.Once fierce and sharp, once gentle and firm.

Which is the real her?Or, is it all her?Darcy looked at her and thought that he really didn't understand her, at least it never occurred to him in this way.

As for Wickham, Darcy realized that what Catherine said was right. He and Georgiana had been living under the shadow of this incident, but the other party had no guilt, and instead lived more shamelessly and calmly.

Is he too weak?

The silence between the two lasted for a full 10 minutes before Darcy spoke with a hoarse voice: "I never thought of this. But I think you are right, I handled it too mercifully."

His voice fell, and the self-blame was clearly audible.Catherine pondered for a long time before saying: "Mr. Darcy, I don't think you need to blame yourself. It seems easy for me to analyze now, but I am just a spectator. When things happen to me, no one can guarantee enough sobriety and reason. Besides, Calm and objective, when we deal with things, we can't avoid judging others by ourselves, and we will use our own thinking to judge other people's moods."

"You are an upright, kind, and tolerant gentleman. You naturally think that even if Wickham doesn't repay you, he will regret it and reform himself. I believe that a man as smooth-talking as he must have said a lot of confession." I beg you to let him go. When you grew up with him, you are inevitably soft-hearted, and you are concerned about your sister's reputation, and you are afraid that he will speak nonsense. You have already handled it very well. You don't need to deny it because of my few words. It’s easier said than done.”

Catherine's comfort relieved Darcy's depression a bit, but it was still heavy: "Miss Catherine, to tell you the truth, I really didn't think about it that much. Before today, this matter was only me, Georgiana and Fitzwilliam The Colonel knew. We were all in a panic, especially Georgiana, who was too young, and was duped by Mrs. Young and Wickham, to realize the seriousness of the matter."

"When she saw my reaction, Georgiana fell into pain and self-blame. She was originally introverted, and she didn't say much since then. She even made a little request to me carefully, for fear of making me unhappy. And I was really full of emotions, shame, anger, and I even wanted to duel with Wickham at one point, wishing I could kill him with my own hands. But when Georgiana cried and begged me, I calmed down. If I lose the duel, I will It is for such a reason, then she may not even be able to survive. After various considerations, I chose to warn Wickham and let him go."

Catherine didn't know there was such a reason: "Mr. Darcy, I apologize for my previous behavior of blaming you based on my judgment."

"You don't have to apologize," Darcy said with a wry smile. "Actually, you're right. My impulse was just a moment. After that, I actually have many options to choose from. But in the end, with the idea that he will reform himself, I let him It's my fault that I didn't get any punishment after making a mistake like this."

"You are a kind gentleman. I can imagine the self-blame and struggle I went through."

"In my education and concept, I have always believed that kindness is a commendable character, but now I regret my soft-heartedness."

"No, sir, please don't fall into doubt because of my words. Although I don't approve of your attitude towards Wickham, you are not a bad person. Wickham has not dared to reveal a word for so many years, and he must be afraid of your revenge. And if you treat your enemies with such generosity, your family and friends must feel very safe. I think Georgiana and Bentley are willing to trust you unconditionally, which is the trust and admiration derived from this. It is not difficult to be kind, but The hard part is that you are still willing to maintain a tolerant heart after seeing despicableness and evil. Mr. Darcy, please don't be too strict, no one will be perfect."

Mr. Darcy couldn't help looking at Catherine, she didn't avoid it, her gaze was changing, soft and warm, and she returned his encouragement and strength.

Never in his life had Darcy felt such emotion in a woman.In his heart, they are all delicate objects in need of care.But Catherine was different, she didn't need his protection, she was even more rational and strong than him.

At this moment, the vague speculation in Darcy's mind suddenly became clear.It turns out that he is not a warrior who overcomes obstacles, and she is not a princess waiting to be rescued. If this girl is a charming flower, then besides the flower, there must be hard scales.

Boom.Boom.Boom.

Darcy felt a strong heartbeat reverberating violently in his chest, and the loud voice almost covered all his thoughts.

If she was by his side, everything would be different.

There were layers of waves in Darcy's heart, but his tone was very soft: "Thank you, Miss Catherine. I will firmly remember what you said."

Darcy looked solemn, and he spoke slowly and earnestly, every word seemed like a sacred promise.

Catherine's heart moved, and an inexplicable emotion flowed in her heart.

"I hope you can have more contacts. After all, it's been a long time since I saw Georgiana so happy. But I can't help worrying that you want to avoid me and don't want to meet Georgiana again, so I told you the whole thing. Of course, there are also some of my selfishness. , but I hope you believe that I do it more out of caring for my sister."

Catherine pretended not to hear "selfishness", and replied: "I will spend more time with Georgiana, I like her very much."

"Thank you very much for your understanding." Darcy said softly, but when he thought about what he was going to say next, a trace of uneasiness appeared on his face, "I have one more thing to do today."

"Oh, please tell me."

"It's about your sister and Bingley. I want to explain to you why they separated," Darcy said. "First of all, I have to admit that there are my reasons for this. It can even be said that my persuasion played a major role, but please Allow me to explain. I think everyone saw that Bentley was different to your sister at the time at Nedfel."

"Charles and I have known each other for many years, he is warm and kind, but he has a hesitant personality. He used to fall in love a lot, but I have never seen him fall in love with a lady so much that everyone said they were getting married, and he did Think so. But pardon me for what follows, I do not see your sister return the same love to Bingley, she is no different to him than to anyone else. I think that if one has affection for another If you don't, you will treat your lover very differently, it's spontaneous, you can't control it, and you can't cover it up, even if..."

Having said this, Darcy suddenly stopped talking, and a blush appeared on his handsome face.

Catherine understood at once the reason for his shyness.He is analyzing with his mood because he treats his beloved very differently.He is arrogant and indifferent to others, but he is warm and sincere to her.

Catherine looked away uncomfortably.

Mr. Darcy ended this sentence resolutely: "In short... I judge that she doesn't love Charles. Besides, there are other reasons why I suggest him to give up this love. These factors are firstly that you don't have enough relatives. Decent, but this is not the main point, the second point is the most important, your mother and sister are really uneducated and unseemly, such a family is a burden and burden to everyone."

Catherine listened quietly, without the slightest sign of anger, and when Darcy finished speaking, she said: "Mr. Darcy, regarding the first point, I can only say that from your point of view, you have no fault at all. You and Mr. Bingley have a relationship. Deep friendship, discouraging your friend from doing inappropriate things out of good intentions, all of us would do that. You said you couldn't see Jane's love, which Mrs. Collins also mentioned. Jane's character is gentle and reserved, and she If you are not familiar enough, you may not be able to see it, so I have no intention of blaming you."

"But I would blame Mr. Bingley. Yes, his wealth, enthusiasm and modesty, but none of these can conceal his cowardice. I don't know if he suffered from leaving Jane, but Jane's sorrow was all caused by him. He even There is no farewell. Things like love, you outsiders can’t feel it, I can understand, but doesn’t he know what my sister thinks of him? If he can’t feel it, it can only be said that his IQ is worrying, he It’s an even more irritating answer to feel it, but to back off because of other people’s persuasion.”

Darcy said: "...You are right, a love, whether he loves her or not, she will definitely feel it."

Catherine was answering seriously, but Darcy's words made her think too much.She couldn't help but want to complain in her heart. This straight man looks upright and reliable, but he is really a set of tricks when he flirts with people. Love words are as crazy as if he doesn't want money. She can think about anything, but he I didn't realize it again!

Catherine forced herself not to look at Darcy, so as not to fall into a shy mood again, she continued the original topic: "As for the second question, you and I mentioned it last time when you talked to me. Your concerns are very real, I can understand that. But for me, these accusations are really harsh and very unpleasant."

Darcy immediately said nervously: "I'm sorry that my words made you unhappy, that's not my intention, I just want to tell you the real reasons and emotions. Maybe you can tell me, how can I avoid it?"

Again!

Catherine couldn't help but glared at him: "I have no experience, Mr. Darcy! But I don't think any woman is willing to hear a condescending statement! Maybe you think such a statement is more proof of your emotions, but whoever listens , will feel that you are giving alms, and there is a message of reward inside and outside the words, you seem to be saying, 'I still like you after you are like this, are you still grateful?'"

Darcy was more nervous than before, he couldn't help explaining: "I didn't mean that."

And Catherine also had a big blush after finishing her impulsiveness.She was obviously talking about Jane and Bingley, why did she go around them again? !

Catherine took a deep breath, calmed down and said, "I don't blame you, Mr. Darcy. What you said is the truth. My family is a bit miserable, but they gave me and Jane companionship and care. No matter what others think, they They are all my family. Mr. Bingley, and... others, if you mind, then I can only say that this relationship is doomed. I agree that marriage is a matter of two families, but I also think that love Therefore, for love, it should not only be passion and admiration, but also compromise and tolerance. This requires independent thinking ability and responsibility. After all, when you are in love, you will lose your mind and cannot see the problem, but the fire of love cannot last forever burning."

Darcy stared deeply at Catherine, and replied: "You are right, Miss Catherine, and I... What everyone should do is to make love not so hot, but it will last forever."

After Mr. Darcy left, Catherine stood at the door for a long time before the heat subsided from her face.She refused to think why she was always led astray by Mr. Darcy, and she went back to the bedroom and saw the letter on the desk.

The letter was sent by Elizabeth. She told Catherine what happened in Losings, and analyzed in detail from multiple angles why she thought Mr. Darcy was still full of love for Catherine.

Catherine had told her of Mr. Darcy's proposal in her last reply, and the letter must have been misplaced.But she understood why Mr. Darcy suddenly wanted to explain the matter of Bingley and Jane to her today.At the end of the letter, Elizabeth told her that there was no need to answer the letter, and that she would be leaving for home in three days, first in London.

Thinking of meeting Elizabeth, Catherine's mood improved a lot.Not long after she read the letter, Aunt Gardner and Jane entered the house together.Today when Aunt Gardiner went out to the spice market as usual, Jane offered to go with her.

Catherine was curious about why Jane made such a request, and Jane replied gently and happily: "Mr. stuff. He was such a good storyteller that it made me very curious."

Catherine asked with a smile, "Then how do you feel?"

Jane's face was flushed: "I must say, without Mr. Walker's narration, I might feel that the market is too noisy and cluttered. But after hearing what he said, I deliberately sniffed the air that was diffused in accordance with his description. Listening to the intertwined aromas, listening to the accents from all over the world, imagine the magical stories of those spices traveling across the ocean to London. Oh, for example, Brazilian coffee, Mr. Walker said that from Brazil to London, it takes I have been on a boat for more than three months, and have passed through many seas and straits. Sorry Kitty, I don’t remember the place names, but when Mr. Walker talked about it, he would tell me the name of each bay and strait, and which countries he would pass along the way. You can ask him next time, he said..."

Catherine listened with interest, and Jane felt Catherine's interested eyes, and she couldn't help being greatly encouraged. She recalled Mr. Walker's story more carefully and told her sister carefully.

Catherine had never seen such a bright and moving beauty in Jane.Jane has always been beautiful, but now she is eloquent and confident, like a goddess, exuding a charming brilliance.

We are not perfect, we all have flaws.Our path of love meets all kinds of people.Some people make us miserable, disappointed, and plunged into endless doubts and low self-esteem.Some people will give us a steady stream of strength, let us work hard, and let us always have expectations and hopes.

Catherine didn't know what Jane was thinking, but in her heart, this was what love should look like.