Where is Chunsheng

He Chunsheng lived downstairs of Jiao Shi for almost half a year, and every morning he and Jiao Shi sent Jiao Chun to the kindergarten, then accompanied Jiao Shi to school, then helped Yang Liu to buy vegetables, and then started his own work.He will help Yang Liu to make lunch together, and we will eat together when Jiao Xi comes back.

Jiao vowed to take a short lunch break at noon, and He Chunsheng would go back to his home to continue working at that time. He didn't have the habit of taking a lunch break.In the afternoon Jiao vowed to go to class, and in the evening He Chunsheng would take Yang Liu out to pick up Jiao Chunshui.

Jiao Xi didn't ask He Chunsheng for help, including when he was late for class and couldn't pick up Jiao Chunshui, it was He Chunsheng who asked him to pick him up.

At night, they went out for a walk together, and then went home separately.Jiao Yan occasionally came down to chat with He Chunsheng after Jiao Chunshui fell asleep, but he would not stay overnight at his house, and would go home before midnight.

Since October, Yang Liu's eyesight has deteriorated day by day.Jiao Yao often takes her to the endocrinologist to prescribe medicine.For Yangliu's eye problem, endocrinologists and ophthalmologists have nothing to do.During an examination at the end of October, the endocrinologist told Jiao Shi that Yangliu had already developed proteinuria, which may be due to diabetic nephropathy. The doctor explained that the blood vessels in Yangliu’s whole body were in poor condition, the blood vessels in the retina had ruptured, and complications occurred in the kidneys. Not surprising at all.Although she has started to strictly control her blood sugar now, the medical history can be speculated for at least ten years, and it is too late now.

Not all diabetic patients progress so quickly like Yang Liu. Yang Liu was discovered late and did not receive treatment immediately after the onset. According to the doctor, the function of the pancreatic islets in her body has almost failed, and it has been difficult to control recently. The doctor suggested that Yang Liu be hospitalized for a period of time, and Jiao Yan also asked her to be hospitalized, but she refused.

"It's useless to be hospitalized, I know it myself." Yang Liu didn't argue with Jiao Yan, just said this with a sigh.Jiao Xi really had nothing to do with her, so he asked Jiao Chunshui to talk to her, hoping to persuade her, but Jiao Chunshui came back and Jiao Xi said: "Dad, grandma said she was going to die. Dad, what is death?"

Jiao Yan swallowed the lump in his throat, and Jiao Chunshui said, "Die...that's..."

Seeing that Jiao Yan couldn't continue, Jiao Chunshui asked, "What is death?"

"It's just going to a far away place, and I will never see my family members again." Jiao Yan hugged Jiao Chunshui tightly and said in a low voice.

"The grandma is dead, can we go find her?" Jiao Chunshui asked further.

Jiao'er's childish words made Jiao Yan's heart ache, but he still forced himself to be calm and said, "We have to wait 100 years before looking for the dead."

Jiao Chunshui wanted to say something else, Jiao swore to her and said: "Chunshui, let's not say death in the future, okay?"

"Why?" Jiao Chunshui suddenly asked again: "Father, is mother dead? I can't see her anymore."

Jiao Yan shook his head and said, "Mom is not dead, you will see her later."

"How old can I be to see my mother?"

"Ten years old."

Jiao Shi still fails to persuade Yang Liu to be hospitalized.He didn't tell He Chunsheng about these things - He Chunsheng shouldn't be involved, about these increasingly huge whirlpools in his life.

At ten o'clock in the morning on a Saturday at the end of October, Jiao Yan found Yang Liu lying outside the kitchen, his face was pale, his whole body was drenched with sweat, and his mind was blurred.Jiao Yao immediately fed her glucose water and called 120.While waiting for the 120 to come, Jiao Yao tested Yang Liu's blood sugar, which was only 1.4mmol/l.

After the ambulance arrived, He Chunsheng who was downstairs heard the sound and also came up.The nurse administered glucose to Yangliu on the spot, and then they moved her onto the lathe together. Jiao Yan got into the ambulance, and outside the car was He Chunsheng pulling the bewildered Jiao Chunshui.She didn't cry or make a fuss, she quietly watched the adults busy, but there was fear in her eyes.

"I'll bring Chunshui there in a while." He Chunsheng said Jiao Jiao.

Jiao Yao nodded, his face was pale and his lips were bloodless, he didn't speak, and closed the side door of the ambulance.

Yang Liu did not fall into a coma for a long time, and soon after the injection of high sugar, her consciousness recovered.This time, he did not insist on leaving the hospital.During the examination, the doctor told Jiao Shi that Yang Liu's proteinuria had already increased a lot, and his kidney function had begun to deteriorate, and uremia might appear within a year or two.

She has progressed to pancreatic islet failure, and her blood sugar is like a roller coaster. If one unit of insulin is used more, hypoglycemia occurs, and if one unit of insulin is used less, the blood sugar can be extremely high.Get an insulin pump if possible.

Yang Liu refused to install the insulin pump. She lay on the hospital bed with a calm expression.She who cried at her husband's bedside a few years ago is now unmoved by her condition.

She was determined to die.

She did not refuse to have a long talk with Jiao Shi, she said to Jiao Shi: "Jiao Shi, I regret treating your father like that. If we don't torment him, he may have to live happily for a few more months. He cured , go faster. I know you are filial and have never blamed me, but I have been blaming myself. If I hadn't sold the house, would you and Chen Qian have come to this point?"

Yang Liu's eyes can only be sensitive to light. She opened her eyes and looked at the world that she could no longer see clearly: "I'm going to die anyway, and I won't cure it. When you grow up, I have nothing to be afraid of."

Jiao Xi held her hand like a teenager, he hated himself for being powerless, but he persuaded himself in his heart: that's what happened, no one can do anything about it.

Jiao vowed: I don't know when it will be my turn.He lay down in front of the willow bed for a while, and the autumn wind from the window woke him up. He thought: At least let me live until the spring water.She is too young to suffer.

He thought of He Chunsheng again, sometimes as long as he thought of He Chunsheng, he hoped that they would never meet again, then He Chunsheng would not need to go through these things again.

He couldn't open his soul to He Chunsheng, which meant that He Chunsheng had to feel all the pain that would be imposed on him in the future.But the world is a lonely journey after all, you love someone, you can't live for him, you can't die for him, there is nothing you can do when you want to separate.

Sometimes Jiao Xi thinks how comfortable it would be if he was suddenly dismembered, and he doesn’t need to think about these issues anymore—sorrow can be left to the living, death is sweet and peaceful, just like his hometown.

But Chunshui is so small, but He Chunsheng will be sad.

He fell asleep again, and not long after he felt fingers brushing the corners of his eyes, he opened his eyes and saw He Chunsheng standing in front of him, looking at him quietly.

Seeing him wake up, Jiao Chunshui called softly, "Father."