lost spark

Dear Ye Ting:

I will never allow you to be released from our love, but allow your weary soul to rest in my arms.

If one day, there is an inscription under my statue, no need to bother, as long as it is your name, I will be entangled with you for eternal life.You have planted dense sunflowers in my heart, and I must be watered by you. You are the scorching sun in my world. If you don't die, I won't die.

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When she was in the third year of junior high school, Ye Ting secretly saw a girl at the same table receive a love letter from another boy. I don’t know which celebrity’s work she excerpted, such as "I love, then my heart can only sink into it." Your heart", something like "I will prepare a really bright spring scene for you", the girl blushed and her heart was beating, and she was furious with embarrassment.

On the contrary, Ye Ting felt that it was very novel, and asked Qu Yixiao to write him a few words when he turned around, something so sweet that it would touch his heart.Qu Yixiao lived up to expectations, imitating others handing homework papers at the door of his classroom, and the papers contained love words that no one could suspect.

Ye Ting loves to read secretly in class.

Later, he went to a foreign country, and he lived alone in the school dormitory.Liang Jieyun understood his frustration and stagnation very well, and gave him a long period of time to consume the change, as if Liang Jieyun seemed very reasonable apart from that incident.

The family quickly adapted to the extremely unfamiliar environment. His father, Ye Wanhong, invested in a Chinese company with his friends. The good profits and high returns made his life more and more comfortable.

Over time, even Liang Jieyun and his wife, who are full of love for pets, suddenly revealed their indifferent nature, no longer mentioning the abandoned person, and not caring about how he is doing, whether he is dead or alive.

Ye Ting seldom goes back, because every time he sees Liang Jieyun, he will feel very difficult. He is not smart enough, and he knew that he should seize the opportunity to ask Qu Yixiao to write even one more sentence. In the often difficult times abroad, these things are rare. The few words were memorized by him over and over again.

Every word contains Qu Yixiao's love, which is proof that Qu Yixiao loves him. After reading it, my heart will be much clearer.

But today, they don't seem to work very well, and seeing these old-fashioned sweet words only makes it more delusional.

In Qu Yixiao's memories, he mentions Zhang Chengli who is hard-spoken and soft-hearted, kind-hearted Fu Jia, and enthusiastic college classmates. I don't know if he skipped it on purpose, or he has forgotten the past, but Ye Ting is not mentioned.

"Then have you ever thought about me?"

When he asked this question in front of Qu Yixiao, who was concentrating on seal carving, Qu Yixiao raised his head slightly, with some surprise in his eyes. Ye Ting bent over and put his hands on the table, with a very serious face that didn't look like a joke.

Qu Yixiao found that Ye Ting had become more clingy than before. For example, in the morning when he put on a neat white shirt to go to class, Ye Ting would stand on tiptoe after changing his shoes, pouted his mouth and asked him to kiss him away. The beginning of the day.

He wrapped his arms around the other's waist deeply, and Ye Ting's smile will be full of enjoyment at this time, and maybe he will be secretly happy all day long.

Getting along more and more sticky made Qu Yixiao a little stunned. After the two met, he often compared the present with the past. Find similar shadows.

People are still the same, but there is still something missing between them, but this will not affect their life, wanton affairs, sharing anecdotes, hugging each other for sleep, and saying good night to each other, sometimes feelings and life are parallel lines that do not contradict each other .

But Ye Ting suddenly asked if he wanted to miss him, and the paper pasted on the window was torn again and again.

"It doesn't matter if you don't want to." Ye Ting didn't wait for him to speak, and said again, feeling wronged after finishing speaking, turned his back to Qu Yixiao, and deliberately emphasized: "It doesn't matter, I know everything anyway."

Qu Yixiao put down the knife and stone in his hand, and with Ye Ting's slumped back, he wanted to ask him what he knew and how much he knew.

The peace he had cultivated all the way was useless in the face of Ye Ting's appearance. Emotions made him throw away his respectable calmness, and only his reason was left to control his cold body.

He has reasons to miss Ye Ting, and he also has reasons to persuade himself not to think about it.

When Qu Shurong passed away, Qu Yixiao was only seven or eight years old. At that time, he was young. After many procedures and trips, his guardians changed from Qu Shurong to Liang Jieyun and Ye Wanhong.

At an age of fragile emotions and sharp minds, a lot of patience and enthusiastic guidance are needed. The Ye family is not rich and powerful, but fortunately, the Ye family is not stingy with Qu Yixiao.

Qu Yixiao seldom lives with guilt, because it is useless and depraved. He often fantasizes about the happiness of his family. He understands that guilt and inferiority are worse than gratitude.

The wind blows him to the south, so he goes south. Most of the loss in the world can be buried in the wind all the way.

He called Liang Jieyun and his wife uncles and aunts, and they were very sensible. He could simply cook and help with cleaning. Ye Wanhong knew a little bit of knowledge and would sign his name after helping him with his homework. The family would sit together and watch TV.

Ye Ting likes to eat lime-flavored potato chips and fried chicken legs made by Liang Jieyun herself while watching TV.Qu Yixiao is an older child, but he can't stand the temptation of a wonderful life. He likes to dip chicken drumsticks in chili noodles, and he likes to see Ye Ting smear his lips in satisfaction after staining his mouth full of ketchup.

At that time, there was an old dog at home, wagging its tail and gnawing on their remaining bones.

Every night he and Ye Ting lie on the same bed, their skins touch each other, their nerves caress each other, this kind of touch is a bit abnormal when they reach puberty, Qu Yixiao no longer calmly listens to Ye Ting's breathing, the same The temperature of the bed is on fire all winter.

It was a weird space, Qu Yixiao fell headlong, his world became outside the space and inside the space, an invisible train took him to shuttle, chasing the discomfort and comfort from the perspective of life.

He often gets up gently in the middle of the night, drinks a glass of cold water, and blows a gust of cold wind.

This feeling is like getting caught in the rain and making people flee in a panic. In order to avoid the rain, he was in a mess and ran among the crowd holding colorful umbrellas. Others looked at him with weird eyes, but he looked at himself with scrutiny and magic eyes.

Ye Ting is clean, bright and attractive, full of spring, innocent like a kind of seduction.

In the fog of memory, he didn't know whether Ye Ting led him badly, or he led Ye Ting badly, just like that, Ye Ting ignorantly snooped at the door of his train, got on the train, and broke into the secret space .

Or attracting each other, Ye Ting's smile is sincere, without any regret or recklessness, at this moment, he is immature, enjoying, carrying out the passionate love that everyone has experienced and yearned for, the most easily dizzy when young.

The biggest advantage of this relationship is that they eat and live together. No one will suspect that they behave a little bit closer. They can be regarded as better than brothers. Their shoulder-to-shoulder relationship makes Liang Jieyun happy and makes classmates tease him kindly .

The day is bright and upright, and the spring water is wrinkled at night.

Of course Qu Yixiao would not do anything more extreme to Ye Ting, they would just hide in a corner where no one was around and secretly rejoice.

For one year, for a whole year, Qu Yixiao held Ye Ting up in the sky, and even if he fell, he was willing to catch him on the ground. Ye Ting was often angry with him. Qu Yixiao never cared about being coquettish.

Summer comes after summer, and the older I get, the less I know how to be afraid.

They learn to get carried away, and occasionally can't help it. In the school toilet, under the camphor tree for evening self-study... They eat the same piece of ice cream, chewing gum, and drink the same bottle of soda, and then share the taste with their mouths.

When the sweetness is too sweet, it is always impossible to imagine what it would be like to leave the lover.

Ye Wanhong's parent's signature also ended that summer.

That was something neither Qu Yixiao nor Ye Ting wanted to recall.