Scum male loyal dog system

Before he went to elementary school, Shen Bai's mother and father were the happiest couple he had ever seen, so he had a very beautiful childhood.

It is said that childhood is beautiful, but most of the good impressions are left in the end. If you really want to talk about memories, you seldom mention them, because what people really envy are children's thinking and living conditions. It wasn't that interesting to me when I grew up, but it was enough at the time.

Shen Bai's clearest memory is when he was with his mother. Once he watched his mother drying the sheets, and the white sheets were shaken in front of him. It should be spring and summer at that time, because the sunshine It's unbelievable, Bai Bai shook all the bright sunlight on Shen Bai's body, making him feel bright in his mind when he thought of that scene.

The other time was when he and his mother were standing on the small road in front of the house. The family had taken a family portrait not long ago. His father went to pick up the photos on the way back from work today. Amy’s mother waited with her. When she finally saw her father appear, her mother He ran over in surprise, leaving Shen Bai watching the two of them in place.

These two do not represent all of Shen Bai's beautiful childhood, but they are enough as a microcosm.

Shen Bai likes children who are watered by love, probably because he likes himself at that time. In his memory, he was like a proud little sun at that time, shining happily wherever he went, but he didn't know yet. There will be shadows everywhere.

Shen Bai's mother and father were the happiest couple he had ever seen after he went to elementary school, but when he grew up and watched the news, he realized that they had just changed from a happy person to an ordinary one. people.

They just became ordinary people, they started to quarrel over small things, oil, salt, soy sauce, vinegar, but life was still going on, but some people were destined not to accept being ordinary, such as Shen Bai's mother.

Shen Bai's mother is the kind of woman who was stopped by the painter when she was pregnant with Shen Bai, hoping to paint for her. She is as perfect as a lotus flower and moon. No matter in the eyes of little Shen Bai or big Shen Bai, his His mother is the whole image of a beautiful woman in his heart.

Women are as delicate as flowers and need to be cared for carefully.

This is what Shen Bai learned from his mother.

Shen Bai's mother is a very ordinary woman, but her life is like a fragile work of art. She draws her own vitality from the love of others. After she got married and had children, she guarded her family wholeheartedly. In contrast, her family also endowed her with infinite vitality.

Family is extremely important.

This is also something Shen Bai learned from his mother.

Shen Bai learned a lot from his mother when he was a child, but later, his father taught him more.

Shen Bai's father is an ordinary man, his life is like weeds on the side of the road, if you get close to him, you will marvel at his lush greenness, but if you get close to him, you will see the soil on the roots of the grass, he Unlike the moon that hangs in the sky, this man is rooted in the soil of human desires.

As the only labor force in the family, Shen Bai understands his father's obsession with money. In the past, when his father came home and hugged the two of them, he would smile happily and say that he hoped to earn a lot of money to support them. Later, when his father returned home , he ate, and then discussed today's losses and gains with Yue Yue, and then asked him how his homework was when he noticed Shen Bai, but before Shen Bai could answer, he was attracted by other things.

"Xiaobai did very well in the exam today."

The mother seemed to be afraid that he would be lost and told the man in time. After hearing this, the man put his eyes on Shen Bai again, and then patted his head.

Father's attention needs to be attracted by himself, and sometimes Shen Bai also envies his mother, as if only adults have the right to talk on an equal footing, and Shen Bai has to fight for it himself.

It was only later that the small house became a big one. In the huge house, it seemed that the voices of each other would be swallowed up. Shen Bai's father didn't find out. Shen Bai found this house that could bury voices, but he was vigilant and dared not Much talk, only his mother, began to protest in panic.

At the beginning, it was just to increase the chances of speaking. Whether his father went out to communicate on the phone or talked at home, Shen Bai always listened to his mother’s voice. Then one day, he suddenly realized that his mother had become a person just like himself. , someone who needs to fight to be noticed.

And then, it was useless to talk too much, Shen Bai saw his mother's gentle voice turned into a cry, she was crying loudly, it seemed that only such a voice could not be swallowed and could be heard by others, At first it was really useful, the father stood there in astonishment, as if he had just heard these voices, but later on, the power of the house became stronger and stronger, Shen Bai sometimes felt that his mother just opened her mouth wide, and there was no one in this world. There was no one who could hear her speak.

As if to help his mother who was fighting against the house, Shen Bai walked to the sofa and told her carefully that he heard, heard what she said, but at that time he was no longer a bright little sun, standing There, Shen Bai found himself opening his mouth, but he knew that his voice was also absorbed by the house, and his mother couldn't hear it.

It's just that he can't be satisfied with Shen Bai anymore, his mother rarely finds him, from the first slap slapped by that woman, Shen Bai hopes that if he can be invisible, he won't be seen by anyone.

A family of three lives like this. They can see each other's gestures, but there is a barrier between them. This barrier makes everything they do like a mime. They can only see but not hear. , the figure of the father leaving indifferently, the hysteria of the mother, and the pale figure in the corner that is getting darker day by day, these images fill the house, but there is nothing else.

The magic power of the house was broken when Shen Bai's mother jumped out of the window. The first sound Shen Bai heard after a long time was his father's crying and roaring.Shen Bai felt that maybe he should do the same, but he didn't, because his similar voice was absorbed by the house too much before, and now he actually felt a little relieved, but it was not for himself, but for that woman.

Living by the love of others, the moment Shen Bai's father stayed away from her, she had already started to wither, Shen Bai didn't hate that woman at all, didn't hate that she couldn't hear him, didn't hate those slaps she slapped, didn't hate Her current choice is because she will always be Shen Bai's favorite and favorite person.

Apart from her, Shen Bai really never loved anyone like that again.

That's why it's so stupid, Shen Bai said to himself, taking other people's love as the source of his life is like putting all of himself on a kite, and this kite is still in the hands of others, he has no way to hold control.

At the beginning, Shen Bai resented his father. The only thing that woman wanted was this man, but when she was alive, the man couldn't give it to her, and she didn't realize everything until after the man died.

But later, only he and his father were left in the whole room, and these two people couldn't ignore each other's existence. In the subsequent relationship, Shen Bai reconciled with each other silently in his heart.

Shen Bai watched this man aging, getting older day by day, just like the woman at that time, Shen Bai knew that he didn't love each other forever, not because he didn't want to, but because as a small human being, such a thing was too much. Too great, he can't do it.

If he can control himself, this man will definitely set all the factors for himself, and then love his mother consistently.

But human love is hard to maintain, even if he wishes so much, he can only watch that thing disappear.

Shen Bai looked at the man in pain, and told himself that it is so difficult for one person to love another person for the rest of his life, if he fails, it is better not to give in the first place.

Maybe he shouldn't forgive the man, so that he won't accept that kind of thinking, but he still chose to reconcile, and at the moment of reconciliation, Shen Bai, who was originally the same as the sun, personally covered the small shining spot in the center with his hands. piece.

Play it safe.

He told the covered light that they were too dazzling and dangerous, and Shen Bai should protect others from being hurt by it.

But he is a product of both men and women, he can't help but want to get close to others, to dedicate himself to others a little bit, from this kind of self-dedication, he can really experience happiness, so that The covered place is always ready to emerge through the cracks.

Shen Bai saw a girl when he was in high school. At that moment, he thought he saw the moon re-hanging in the sky, and a light burst out in his heart, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't hide it.

When experiencing the turbulent emotions in his heart, Shen Bai felt that this was like a miracle of nature. It would be like an ocean that would never dry up. He was confident that it would exist forever. That night, Shen Bai secretly made up his mind, he knew, He is different from his father.Then the next day, he and the girl came together, but the next time, when they were walking side by side on the way after school, the girl's hand stretched out to his place, and she held it half shyly and half boldly. He touched his arm, and at that moment, what Shen Bai felt was not the sweetness that dazzled his head, but the fear buried in his heart.

He thought of the first time his mother slapped him in his room that year, and he thought of his father's first howl after his mother jumped off...

The amazed love affair between boys and girls of that age lasted for less than a week. Shen Bai felt in the middle of how the love in his heart evaporated from the ocean to nothing left. He realized that it was living in his father's blood. The things in his body also live in his body, even he can't even compare with his father, not long after being with the girl, he can't find the slightest feeling of liking others, even if he frantically searched Then, only repulsion remains.

He is just a boy who can't give love to anyone. He didn't give it to his mother back then, he didn't give it to that girl later, and he won't give it to anyone in the future.

Sometimes the blood inherited from his mother would suddenly boil, making him love others, but he was always suppressed, until the young Shen Bai would curl up in his bed, wishing he could just lie there and disappear.

How I wish I could be a person who knows how to love,

How I wish I could be a person worthy of being loved.

For such a wish, Shen Bai would exhaust all his strength just to recite it silently. He just closed his eyes and hid in the room. He kept shouting these two words in his heart. This was probably the deepest part of his heart at that time. Pursue.

Later, Shen Bai gradually learned how to suppress his heart. He lived a suitable distance from others without appearing arrogant. He almost couldn't recall his previous wish, but one day, he suddenly fell into a dark world. .

[Drip - a suitable carrier has been detected, the system is binding...

Hello, I am loyal dog system, very happy to serve you. 】

The author has something to say: If you have to have chicken soup, you just want everyone to be what you like

I really never thought that I could write a whole big story. It is really rare that I can finish one thing to the end. Maybe I am also changing.

I’m just stupid and can’t distract my attention, so I either concentrate on coding or worry about three-dimensional things, so I apologize again for the previous break, and that break has taught me a lesson, but it’s okay a bit good

After adding some code word groups, watching them while diving, I found that it is easy to be infected by a strange atmosphere when looking at others. The list and income become the entire value of an article, but I lost it after the update There are many, and sometimes I can’t make up a dollar for updating every day. In the days to come, I can only shine purely with love. I am really grateful to everyone for being able to post until now.

The biggest regret is probably the loss of some familiar names, and it is a pity that this article cannot be seen by many people

Thanks to the little angel who has stayed until now