[Comprehensive] The correct posture of fooling the savior

"...This manor is pretty good, it fits my aesthetics quite well, and it's much better than the Diagon Alley I just passed. Let me say that Diagon Alley made my impression of wizards rise by N percentage points, and then dropped by N [-] percent, the things they sell are very interesting, the street, and the entrance to the dilapidated bar, it’s really too dirty, my God! How can you wizards endure such a dirty environment..."

From a long distance, Harry heard a strange male voice muttering and complaining, accusing east and west.For some reason, before he saw the real person, he felt a little uncomfortable vigilance.

The Dark Lord didn't notice Harry's expression. He pushed open the door of the living room in a natural way, and said to the guy who was half-slumped on the sofa and was complaining to Barty Crouch Jr.: "Mo Riati, what are you complaining about?"

Moriarty sat up straight at once, regained his energy: "What am I complaining about—I have a lot to complain about! My God, the living environment of wizards, I mean Diagon Alley, is really terrible , and your way of travel, that apparition, what a handsome looking space movement, but in fact it is really uncomfortable! I endured it for a long time before I didn’t spit out something that didn’t fit my personality! I’m down Can I apply to drive my cool sports car next time? The global limited edition Maserati, the color is my favorite silver gray - oh no, actually I don't like silver gray that much, in fact I prefer light green, my family is lucky My eyes are of this color, and they will change color under different light, like reflecting the starry sky, so beautiful..."

Harry followed the Dark Lord into the living room, and sat with the Dark Lord on the sofa opposite Moriarty; by the way, he glanced at little Barty sitting next to Moriarty, and found that he His eyes were straight, his expression was natural, and he was obviously used to this kind of nagging.

The Dark Lord naturally tapped the table amidst Moriarty's complaints, and four steaming cups of mocha appeared on the table, one of which was moved steadily in front of Moriarty.He smiled and interrupted Moriarty's tirade: "Then let me apologize for your unhappiness? Mocha, fresh, my men just placed an order from the Speedy Cafe on Ba., magic transfer, instant delivery Now, make up for the mocha I accidentally knocked over your cup of mocha last time, and all the discomfort you feel in the wizarding world. OK?"

Moriarty's eyes seemed to be twinkling—Harry thought the expression was a little fake—and he said excitedly, "My dear, you are so sweet! I just placed an order at Speedy and then magically transferred it." Is it? I can feel the freshness just out of the oven, and the full love contained in it!"

Moriarty picked up the Mocha in a very exaggerated manner, and took a sip intoxicated: "Ah! This warm Mocha warms my heart—my dear, I really love you, a man who is cold on the outside and warm on the inside. Fan Er! Oh, I feel like I love you more than before!"

It was the first time for Harry to see such a hot (hao) emotional (wu) direct (lian) (chi) confession, and his face turned a little blue.

The Dark Lord didn't know why he always felt that the atmosphere was a bit strange, but he didn't feel where the strangeness was.He collected himself, dragged himself out of the strange premonition, smiled at Moriarty in front of him, and said, "As long as you like it."

Moriarty interfaced naturally: "Of course I like it very much. And..."

"And, in return, and as a gift of love, I brought you this!" Moriarty smiled sweetly, took out a USB flash drive, and placed it in front of the Dark Lord, tapping his orchid fingers high Yes, "The information you asked for. By the way, you must like it very much, right? Don't give a confession of love-well, is it a thank you for love?" He felt aggrieved under the shocked eyes of the Dark Lord Changed my words and changed the confession to thank you.

The Dark Lord's eyes were still extremely disbelieving, he picked up the finger-sized thing, and shook it: "A USB flash drive? - You gave me the information of a USB flash drive in the wizarding world? The magic barrier blocks all electronic products , where do you want me to find a computer that can be used to read the data?"

Hearing this, Moriarty became angry.He poked at the table and accused angrily: "Wizards are really old-fashioned! You can't use any electronic products! Just now I was bored waiting to swipe my phone, only to find that there is no Internet-you know how painful it is Do you feel? No WIFI, no 4G! I'm dying of emptiness!"

It's a pity that none of the people here are Internet addicts, or there is no such strange thing as Internet addiction in the wizarding world, so his words did not resonate with anyone.The Dark Lord curled his lips and said, "I'm sorry, old-fashioned means safety. Do I really want to connect to the Internet here and let you destroy the firewall and treat this place as a back garden and empty out all the information at once? ?”

As soon as the words fell, the guy who seemed angry just now suddenly laughed, covered his face with his hands, and said shyly to the Dark Lord: "Oh, I will be embarrassed to praise me like this,"

The Dark Lord rolled his eyes at the moody guy in a very distorted way: "I'm not complimenting you."

"Don't be shy, aren't you just complimenting me as the emperor of the electronic world, all the firewalls are useless to me? This compliment makes me really happy—" Moriarty seemed to be pleased, Smiling from ear to ear, he took out another thing, which seemed to be a mobile phone pendant, put it on the table, and turned to Batty who was holding mushrooms beside him, "Dear little Batty, can you help me?" How about a magnifying spell?"

Little Barty gave a magnifying spell with a blank face, and continued to treat himself as a dumb mushroom.

After zooming in on the small thing on the table, I realized that it was a book hanging on a mobile phone pendant.

Moriarty pushed the book in front of the Dark Lord, smiling brightly: "Surprise! I was joking just now, I know you are backward and old and have no internet, so the USB flash drive just now is a lie , the real gift is this information book, I also specially asked my dear little Barty to help me cast a shrinking spell to give you a surprise. Do you like the surprise that little Barty brought to you?"

Barty Crouch, who was always pulled to lie innocently, glanced speechlessly at Moriarty next to him, and explained to the Dark Lord pitifully: "No, master... I don't know... I helped him before. Shrunk down a lot, I didn't know there was a book for you, I didn't know he was going to make a joke like that..."

"Don't worry, Barty, it's not your fault," the Dark Lord said to Barty, "You can't stop what Moriarty is going to do."

He gave Moriarty a savage look and warned, "Don't tease my men."

"Don't tease little Barty, how about I tease this—this little brother?" Moriarty turned to Harry, who was sitting next to the Dark Lord with a disconsolate face, "He is obviously not your subordinate, right? He What is it yours? An illegitimate child? It doesn’t look like much; a student? You wouldn’t bring a student to see me; an heir? It doesn’t look like much either; then, could it be—a lover? Isn’t it?”

Harry raised his head slightly, and smiled sweetly at Moriarty: "Hi, I'm Harry Potter, nice to meet you."

Harry's unflinching, direct confrontation made the Dark Lord feel much more at ease. It was much better than Little Barty, who kept pretending to be mushrooms and then apologized whenever he made a mistake. He glanced at it with admiration. Leigh turned to Moriarty and introduced him, "Harry is..."

The Dark Lord was stuck, he didn't know what noun to use to describe it, and finally managed to find a noun he used often: "...he is...he is my boy."

"YourBoy?" Moriarty's eyes widened, and he repeated in disbelief, "Excuse me, dear, are you already so big that you don't look like your child anymore? No, no , BOY has other explanations—wait a minute, are you a pedophile? Will you really fall in love with me when I am ten years younger?"

"I'm 15, not a pedophile—" Harry cut in.

"It has nothing to do with age." The Dark Lord interrupted their words in a little embarrassment, and glared at Moriarty, "Jim Moriarty, I want to warn you seriously, if we change the topic again, we won't meet again Here's the chance."

"It's so ruthless, throw it away after using it, deny it after eating it, and hang it up, you scumbag," Moriarty pouted, "It's better for little Barty to treat me, isn't it, Barty?"

Barty Crouch Jr. turned his head expressionlessly, looked straight at him, and said, "Aren't I your queen cleaner?"

"How can I be willing to let you work as a cleaner! You slander me!" Moriarty accused pretentiously.

Little Barty Crouch, who really wanted to be a quiet mushroom in this meeting but was always pulled out by Moriarty to hang on the wall, chuckled and said, "I'll clean up the traces of the crime scene for you, and I'll clean it up every day." New + forget everything, this is not a cleaner, what is a cleaner?"

Moriarty pretended to be innocent, and gave Little Barty a wink: "Ahahaha, don't pay attention to these details, I love you so much, Little Barty, you don't know how much surprise you brought me , I think my Juanfu must be crazy busy with all kinds of untraceable cases recently, he is usually so boring, I brought him so many surprises, he will definitely love me more..."

"With all due respect," Harry interjected, "how many real loves do you have?"

Moriarty turned his head and blinked innocently at Harry: "My true love will always be my dear Highness the Demon King! At first I fell in love with him at first sight, and fell in love at second sight, but now I see him for the third time, and I will be forever in love with him." Don't marry!"

Hehe, Harry poked the villain desperately in his heart.

"I can't bear your love." The Dark Lord's face was completely dark, and he glanced at the few people in the living room who kept talking nonsense, "And, you guys, don't talk about it anymore!"

Moriarty

The author has something to say: obediently made a zipper gesture on the mouth, and threw a wink by the way.

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small theater

Xiao Ha hadn't seen Mo Niang yet, so she became vigilant when she heard the voice.

——Drip, drop, drop!

——Love Rival Radar Warning!

--Attention please!There is a rival in love ahead!

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small theater

Little Barty followed Mo Niang to clean up all kinds of crime scenes + forget everything.

Scotland Yard: Your sister!What about the blood?What about fingerprints?What about witnesses?Why is crime getting more and more sophisticated now?

Juan Fu: [Song] I've been annoyed, annoyed, annoyed recently, I always feel that life is a little extreme...

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small theater

Little Batty: I'm so tired, why do I always get involved in the Shura field.Light yourself a wax [candle].

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#Today’s small theater is also the body of the article#