Self-illness

When Chen Yi's bucket of instant noodles bottomed out, Amu finally woke up from urinating.Seeing the women with messy hair and clutching their stomachs and running to the toilet, Chen Yi was relieved a lot, at least he didn't have to bother to wake them up.

It was nearly five o'clock, and it was probably already bright when I got home. Yahan was spinning his arms, approached Kou obediently and said, "Is there any more?"

"Instant noodles."

"Oh." Yahan got into the bar and began to tear the bucket of instant noodles, not forgetting to take care of Chen Yi: "Do you want to make another bucket for you?"

"no need."

Chen Yi fanned away the smoke rising from the side with his hands, and looked at Kou, who was smoking almost non-stop, obediently: "Are you a heavy smoker?"

"Huh?" Kou obediently turned on the phone, checked the time, and pressed his breath again: "It's okay."

"You seem to be in a hurry."

"Yes. I have a call to answer."

"Girlfriend's?" Chen Yi seldom has this kind of gossip spirit, and it's rare to have this kind of spirit, but after all, it belongs to his own research project, so he suddenly feels that these are all justifiable.

Kou obediently hummed absent-mindedly, took a puff of cigarette by the way, after a while, seemed to think of something, and added: "It's a very important person."

In winter at the age of 17, Kou obediently said that I lost Tang Xiaxia forever.

Chen Yi recalled for no reason that it is now autumn that is deep in winter: "Which season do you like?"

"Spring." Kou was intrigued by the sudden jump of the topic: "I like the feeling of the growth of all things. Even creatures that grow in the shade are also working hard to reproduce in spring, and spring is neither cold nor hot, so it is convenient to wear clothes."

"You are very clear about your preferences." Spring is another unexpected answer for Chen Yi. If she only read the information, she can't imagine that the enthusiastic Kouai would like this kind of green, warm season, or autumn. Isn't it the depression of the winter, or the bitterness of winter, that is what she should pursue?

"I like winter."

"What's the reason?"

"If I have to have a reason, it's probably because I can stay awake all the time. Because of the cold, the cells in my whole body are trembling all the time, and I can't feel drowsy like in spring." So today is a rare intoxication, even if it is very short, it is considered an exception up.It is really rare to have the confidence to fall asleep in an unfamiliar environment regardless of it.

"What's so good about being sober, I think it's good to be like them." Kou obediently swallowed a big gulp of wine, and pointed to the messy little girls at the head of the bar before going to bed: "No matter what you do, it's OK if you feel good. "

"That's why I've always envied them."

Chen Yi lowered his head and smiled, and when he looked up, he found Kou Guaiguai staring at him. The two were silent for a while, Kou Guaiguai spoke first: "People are so strange, they all live because they want to live like others."

"For example?" Chen Yi tilted his head and thought for a moment: "I don't quite understand what you mean?"

"It's nothing, it's just this feeling, I can't say it, I always think people are weird."

"Oh." It turns out that everyone thinks people are very strange.Chen Yi's mentality of suspecting that he was abnormal was once again at a loss.

Kou Kuaiguai's cell phone vibrated suddenly, out of the habit of recording, Chen checked the time, it was exactly five o'clock.

"It's me. It's okay, you turn on the light first, yes, did you turn it on? Well, okay, don't worry, it's just your dream." Kou obediently used a tone similar to that used in Cui's sleeping technique , softly comforting the person on the other end of the phone while standing up and walking around the corner.

After Amu finished a bucket of instant noodles, he stared at Chen Yi with blackened eye circles: "You won't really bend like this, will you?"

Swallowing the instant noodles in his mouth, Amu used the fork in his hand to talk to Kou, who was seriously talking on the phone in the corner, and nodded: "Don't look at her serious look now, those flirtatious deeds in the past can't be washed away in this life. For opponents like you who are not her opponents, it is best to stay away."

"Yes, keep it far away, let me guard it alone." The octopus didn't know whether it had just woken up or was still trying to fall asleep, its disheveled mouth moved, and it spoke vaguely drunk: "Persist It is victory, and I will be the guardian until the end."

Hearing what the octopus said, Amu showed a disdainful smile: "Little sister, take care of it slowly."

"Believe it or not, I bet this little girl was probably brought up at home when she was 23 or 30 years old." Amu finished drying the instant noodles on the first floor, and wiped his mouth with a tissue: "I don't know if you are a psychologist. Regardless of this, in short, I have been in the circle for so many years, and I have seen a lot of children who squeezed into the circle like following the trend when they were young, and took life and death vows as love. When they really come into contact with the world, they have to face it by themselves When it comes to real survival, the original shape will emerge after being hit. Otherwise, you don’t think about why there are so few LES in their [-]s.”

"Okay, that's all you can say." The smell of alcohol and tobacco on Amu's body completely overwhelmed the smell of perfume she brought out at the beginning, and Chen winked at Yahan: "I'm going back."

Sure enough, as soon as she helped Amu, her legs became weak and she couldn't use any strength. Yahan's thin arms and thin legs barely carried Amu on his back and staggered out. When passing by Kou Kuai, she wanted to say hello, but Kou obediently put her hand away. Made a hush motion on his lips.

she is singing.When he walked to the exit of the bar, Chen Yi heard a subtle melody, a very gentle tone, and he was very familiar with the songs that were often recorded in school textbooks.Chen Yi looked back at Kou obediently in the dark, wondering if the person over there could be Tang Xiaxia.

Yahan was in charge of driving, and Amu had already fallen asleep in the back seat.

After the car drove for a long distance, perhaps feeling the dull atmosphere, Yahan remembered to turn on the music switch, and asked by the way, "How do you feel?"

"It's okay." From the beginning, Chen Yi noticed Yahan's quiet personality and was not good at communicating.For example, she obviously wants to ask if you have a good time today?But it has become a question of how do you feel now, which belongs to the type of incoordination of mental behavior awareness.As a result, what I want to express is often different from the actual expression, which affects my social mood. Over time, with sensitive factors, I don't like to talk too much.

"That Kou guaiguai, how is your relationship with her?" Seems like a good opportunity to get to know Kou guaiguai side by side, otherwise, if Amu was here, it would be a quarrel to death, and Chen Yi felt a little grateful for the effect of the wine.

The speed of the car has slowed down significantly, and the common problem of uncoordinated mental behavior awareness is that they are not good at distracting conversations when they are concentrating on something.But this speed should be controllable, Chen Yi is not sure if this is the right time.

"We've known each other for more than two years." Ahan seemed to have done some calculations before he said exactly: "I was 21 years old and worked in an underground bar. Kuaiguai was about my age, and they were also doing odd jobs together at the time, but she could play the guitar. more popular than me."

"You are also very good at bartending." Out of professional habits, Chen Yi habitually caught the loopholes in Yahan's words to guide her: "The important thing is to recognize yourself. Popularity is the reaction of the outside world to the individual, and it cannot represent the individual. ability."

Ahan probably didn't expect the topic to turn in this direction, so he smiled awkwardly: "Amu said you are a psychiatrist."

"Yes."

"Actually, what you said, I have also thought about it myself, why should I measure my ability and status by whether I am popular?" The speed of the car was getting slower and slower, Yahan parked the car on the side of the road: "I usually drive less , I'm not used to it, let's take a rest."

"Oh good." This is a lot more reassuring.

"But I want to be welcomed by the outside world, not by myself. Just like an idol star, even if he can be sure of himself, but if others are not sure of him, won't he lose his leverage as a star?" Ya Han obviously thought about this issue very deeply. Although his expression was very confusing, Chen Yi probably understood that what she wanted was the welcome from the outside world, not just her own approval. "

"So, what we psychiatrists say is actually mostly unpleasant. It can only solve problems like heart disease, but not a person's life demands." Chen Yi untied his seat belt: "Let's change it." Come on, let me drive."

It was a total of three hours' drive, and it was only halfway through now that the sky was shining. Chen Yi wanted to go back and get a good night's sleep.

"Then, why do you want to be popular?" The street lights on both sides dimmed, and there was a faint bluish-white glow on the top of the tall buildings in the city. Looking at the empty streets, Chen Yi looked forward to the moment when the golden light would shine.

"Because that way, many people can listen to me and listen carefully."

"Standing on the stage, standing in the light like Kou guaiguai?" There is indeed a sense of attention, even if it is only a small stage, even if the people in the audience are half drunk and crazy: "Then why don't you learn the guitar Singing or something, but learning how to mix wine."

Yahan opened a pack of cigarettes, lit it several times before lighting it up, and spat smoke rings out the window jerky: "It can't be done."

Precisely because I can't do it, this desire will always be hidden in my heart, becoming an important existence farther and farther away, torturing myself.

The author has something to say:

No sound here.