fingers of musicians

He Yinxu got out of the car, her long hair hanging down her waist, and a shorter strand at her temples, which was wet with tears and stuck to her cheek.He practiced piano hard for so many years, just hoping to get his father's approval. Hearing that his father was going to live with others, he felt a deep sense of abandonment and felt that there was no point in playing the piano anymore, but Zhong Guanbai said, His father actually had high hopes for him.

He Yinxu belongs to children whose parents are strict and sensible. This kind of children usually have a characteristic. When they are severely criticized, they can hold back their sad emotions and seriously reflect on themselves, but when they are treated gently, they cry.

What's more, he had acted against his father impulsively before, and he was sad, lost and disturbed when he was in the bar. After listening to some teachings, the loss was less, but the guilt overwhelmed him.

The kid was wearing a hoodie today. Zhong Guanbai saw his crying miserably, so he walked over, pulled up the big hat and covered He Yin Xu's red eyes with half of his eyes. The face is completely covered in the hat so that no one can see it.

"Let's go, Mr. Lu, please eat crab rice dumplings." Zhong Guanbai walked in front of He Yinxu, and made a "follow me" gesture with a very chic back.

He Yinxu followed behind and whispered, "Thank you, Teacher Lu."

Zhong Guan said without looking back, "You're welcome, the main reason is that I want to eat."

Entering the private room, the waiter is familiar with the way, and before the menu is served, a cage of crab rice dumplings is served. This is a must-order for Zhong Guanbai when he comes here. He must eat it as soon as he comes in, and he can't wait.

The dumplings are so thin that you can feel the soup flowing inside when you pick them up with chopsticks.

Zhong Guanbai once commented like an old monster in the deep mountains: Take a bite and then suck it, it's like sucking the essence of heaven and earth.As for the heat of the essence, he didn't want to know.

Lu Zaoqiu also prefers to come here, he has no interest in food, the only hobby here is to watch the clock pass and eat for nothing.

After the food was served, Zhong Guanbai ate for a while, looked up and saw Lu Zaoqiu, who was eating elegantly, and He Yinxu, who was obedient and obedient, and suddenly had the illusion that he had a wife and children, and his life was complete.

"Student Xiaohe, I'll take you home after dinner. You, Teacher Lu, and I have grown-up things to do." Zhong Guanbai put on an adult face. In fact, there is nothing important, but he just wanted to Let the children and Lu Zaoqiu talk about adult love alone.

As soon as He Yinxu heard the word "go home", he said in a muffled voice, "I don't want to go back."

The kind teacher Zhong took out a reassurance: "Student Xiaohe, this is with Chief Lu, not with me, so you can rest assured to eat, take care of it, and you won't be sent here to wash dishes."

"No..." He Yinxu hesitated for a long time before deciding to tell Zhong Guanbai that he had really done a terrible thing, "Mr. Zhong, my father has been staying with Mr. Wen these days and has not come back. So... …I hate practicing piano these days.”

Zhong Guanbai didn't think it was a big deal, so he instructed: "Then you just go back to practice after eating, and practice two more hours every day to make up for it."

He Yinxu hesitated for a while before continuing: "...But, there is no piano at home. Because of rejection... Two days ago, I found a decoration company and asked them to change the piano room into a... ..."

Speaking of the latter part, his voice was so soft that Zhong Guanbai couldn't hear: "Changed to what?"

He Yinxu lowered his head and said like a primary school student admitting his mistake: "...the video game room."

Zhong Guanbai was actually not too bad-tempered, especially with children, but he was stunned for two seconds after hearing He Yinxu's words, and suddenly stood up and dropped his chopsticks.

The peachwood chopsticks inlaid with gold slammed against the table and fell to the ground, making a few crisp sounds.

He Yinxu was taken aback.

That's not like Zhong Guanbai's usual appearance at all.

He Yinxu knew that if it was He Yulou, he would definitely be angry when he heard about it, but He Yulou never threw things with his hands. When He Yulou got angry, he would spend a lot of time reasoning with him, and then let him be alone Think through your mistakes.

Zhong Guanbai was joking just a moment ago, he didn't expect that Zhong Guanbai would be angry the next quarter, let alone that Zhong Guanbai's anger would be so terrifying.

Lu Zaoqiu stood up, pulled Zhong Guan Bai into his arms, and said in a low and calm voice, "Ah Bai, don't do anything."

Zhong Guanbai still stared at He Yinxu, and said to Lu Zaoqiu: "He can do such a thing with a little bit of dissatisfaction, but he doesn't know how much the teacher and Mr. He paid to keep a piano, he...he He doesn't look like a piano player..." Zhong Guan was so angry that he couldn't speak.

"Xiaohe, Abai and I need some time." Lu Zaoqiu finished speaking to He Yinxu who was standing aside and dared not speak, and then asked the waiter to take He Yinxu to another box.

When there were only the two of them left in the room, Lu Zaoqiu turned Zhong Guanbai's head and forced him to look at him: "Abai, it's different now than it was back then. Besides, he really doesn't know about those things, you can't blame him. "

"He doesn't know..." Zhong Guanbai felt so angry and disappointed when he read that memoir, even though he knew that He Yinxu didn't know anything intellectually, he still couldn't get over it and wanted to find He Yinxu immediately. Yin Xu, "Then he needs to know today."

Lu Zaoqiu imprisoned Zhong Guanbai in his arms: "Calm down."

"Zaoqiu, don't stop me, he just needs to know today." Zhong Guanbai struggled a bit, but did not break free.

Lu Zaoqiu repeated: "Ah Bai, calm down, there are too many things before and after, so think clearly before talking."

Zhong Guanbai couldn't break away from Lu Zaoqiu's arm no matter how hard he tried, he became even angrier: "Lu Zaoqiu, let me go."

Of course, that anger didn't just come from the powerlessness of not being able to rush over to teach He Yinxu a lesson immediately. The stronger sense of powerlessness was that everything that happened back then had already happened, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't change anything.

"Abai—"

"Don't worry about this matter." Zhong Guanbai said, "I'll handle it."

Lu Zaoqiu's eyes dimmed, and he asked, "What do you want to do with it?"

Zhong Guan was still angry and was stopped by Lu Zaoqiu all the time, with a hint of impatience in his tone: "Anyway, I can't deal with it calmly. It's not like you don't know who I am."

Lu Zaoqiu said: "Because I know, you are not allowed to be impulsive."

"Lu Zaoqiu, I'm not a machine, and I've never been able to calm down and restrain myself like you... How could it be possible for the piano player not to be impulsive? How could it be possible not to be angry? How did the improvisation at the end of "Ode to the Autumn Wind" come about? They should be remembered Don’t forget, especially, I want to remember him,” Zhong Guanbai pointed to He Yinxu, “he has to remember too. He has to know where he came from and where he’s going; he has to know What he is doing and what he wants to do is so important...he doesn't even know what he is doing now." The more Zhong Guanbai talked, the more excited he got, and the further he went, he didn't know what he was angry about at the end It's too late, even a little incoherent, "Lu Zaoqiu, you know, what I rely on to play the piano, why I play the piano, I can't stand it. You can practice the technique calmly, no matter what happens, it will always be correct when you play it, like a precision instrument, I can't, I always can't..."

Lu Zaoqiu slowly let go of the hand that imprisoned Zhong Guanbai, and said in a deep voice, "Abai, do you think I'm a machine?"

Zhong Guanbai hesitated, and immediately denied: "That's not what I meant."

Lu Zaoqiu stared at Zhong Guanbai without saying a word.

"I just... I just can't stand him doing things like this. After I finished playing "Ode to the Autumn Wind", those things grew on me like sores that couldn't be cured..." Zhong Guanbai looked at Lu Zaoqiu with heavy hair Eye color, explained anxiously, "Early autumn, I admire your playing skills and musical interpretation. For you, music can also be just music, a simple and smooth melody line, with nothing behind it. You can study the music before the era of recording. How the great masters interpreted their music, and then interpreted as they did.”

After so many years, Zhong Guanbai certainly knew how Lu Zaoqiu worked.Lu Zaoqiu is not as free and unrestrained as Zhong Guanbai, he can write whatever he wants, play whatever he wants, regardless of other things, and put his own emotional expression in the first place.He needs to study the repertoire of those great musicians, music interpretation, string bowing and fingering, the coordination of various parts of the orchestra, the differences between the instruments at that time and the present...even the design of the placement of the instruments, and then coordinate the entire orchestra, not just Sitting in the most conspicuous position of the orchestra and playing the piano beautifully.

Lu Zaoqiu has always been as standard as a textbook, making everyone feel correct and perfect. That is no longer a proof of his own strength - he no longer needs to prove this since he was a teenager - it is any top Orchestra needs.

"I—" Zhong Guanbai held Lu Zaoqiu's hand very solemnly, and said reverently, "I respect this very much, very, very much. Lu Zaoqiu, you are the most respected violinist and orchestra chief, bar none .”

"...But myself, no. You know, I need stimulation, I need to care, I need to be impulsive...I even need pain, I need to carry a lot of things that come with music in my stomach to live again, even if my If my body wants to vomit, I have to swallow it back...so, now I really..." Zhong Guanbai looked at Lu Zaoqiu, holding the other's hand in his own, as if holding something that could redeem him, "It's really sad. Teacher and Mr. He... If he had known earlier, he would not have dared to do such a thing... If he had known earlier..."

Speaking of the last sentence, something is already wrong.

Perhaps even Zhong Guanbai himself didn't realize that when he talked about He Yinxu at this time, it was as if he was talking about his previous self.Although the two of them did different things, and they didn't know anything when they did something wrong, but deep down in his heart, it was the same weakness and the same instability.This lack of willpower secretly hit the pain point that he regretted the most.

But people probably can’t directly hate their past self, so they have to hate others——

I wish I could rush out and pick up the child outside, press him in front of the piano, tell him what that means, and save him from the pain of regretting yesterday, tearing off his coat and being reborn again.

When Zhong Guanbai blurted out the words "he doesn't look like a piano player" and "I want to remember, he has to remember too", Lu Zaoqiu vaguely noticed where Zhong Guanbai's irrationality came from At this time, the vague perception has also become clear.After all, Zhong Guanbai still hated himself, but he didn't know it, thinking that he was full of anger because he was angry with his younger generation.

"A Bai," Lu Zaoqiu understood, and hugged Zhong Guan Bai from behind, his voice was as soft as a feather rubbing against Zhong Guan Bai's ear, like the most gentle coaxing, "A Bai... ..."

Zhong Guanbai vented for a long time, while Lu Zaoqiu listened quietly, the fire in Zhong Guanbai's heart was almost burned up to now, he listened to "Abai" in Lu Zaoqiu's arms, and his heart boiled for the last time It also gradually calmed down.

"Ah Bai." Lu Zaoqiu said next to Zhong Guanbai's ear, "One thing, you are wrong."

After Zhong Guanbai got angry, he couldn't remember exactly what he said, so he leaned his head on Lu Zaoqiu's neck and said kindly: "...well, I'll listen."

"Abai, you are always too afraid of being disappointed by others. Mr. Wen said 'come again' to you, and I said 'come again' to you, because I have expectations for you. That's right. But Mr. Wen doesn't expect you to take any responsibility , not expecting you to become Mr. He. He has seen you love Qin since you were a child, and he expects you to do what you really like, and expects you to be happy. Mr. Wen is a transparent person, and he also sees you very well Heavy, he misses Mr. He so much, he thinks twice about asking you to play "Ode to the Autumn Wind". If you can take over what he wants to pass down, of course it is good, but if what you really love is not the qin, how can he Will you be asked to play for 20 years?" Lu Zaoqiu stood behind Zhong Guanbai, holding Zhong Guanbai's hands with two hands, and placed them in front of the latter, "Abai, I told you too, In the past, it was not disappointment, but just fear that you would lose the thing you love the most. Before being with you, I had no fear. After being with you, I became afraid of this and that. Thinking about it, it was just because I was afraid of you unhappy."

"Early autumn..." Zhong Guanbai's heart was numb and soft, "Why did you tell me this..."

"You don't know?" Lu Zaoqiu asked back, "Then tell me, why did you lose your temper just now?"

Zhong Guanbai said sullenly: "...I've already said it."

Lu Zaoqiu said: "I didn't hear it, say it again."

"Because of that kid He Yinxu..." Zhong Guanbai suddenly didn't know where to start. The place where the anger was burning just now was quiet, and not even a single spark burst out. He suddenly understood, "...I I'm afraid he will become me."

Lu Zaoqiu was silent for a while, then turned Zhong Guanbai around, and kissed him: "If you can't love one, you don't know what to do with two."

Zhong Guanbai blushed: "He, he dares, how could that kid He Yinxu become me to make you love?"

The corners of Lu Zaoqiu's mouth slightly curled up, looking into Zhong Guanbai's eyes and said in a low voice, "Look, he won't become you.

"Xiaohe is young now, even if he loves the piano, he doesn't know it. He completely thinks that he plays the piano for Mr. He's expectation. Ah Bai, if you tell him those past events, it will only make him feel guilty and let him continue to play the piano for his father. Then when will he know whether he really likes piano or not?"

"That's right, it makes sense." Zhong Guanbai nodded twice, feeling very anxious for He Yinxu's parents, "But... what if he really doesn't like it?"

"If he really doesn't like it, I think Mr. He won't force it." Lu Zaoqiu said, "Life is short, what to do, only say what you want."

Zhong Guanbai heard this, gnawed on Lu Zaoqiu's lips for a while, and flattered him: "President Lu, you are my heart's desire."

Then, taking advantage of Lu Zaoqiu's enthusiasm for being courteous, he rolled up his sleeves, showing his arm muscles that cannot be ignored, and opened the door of the box: "Then what, Chief Lu, wait for me for a while, I'll let classmate Xiao He Feel what it means to be willing. For practicing the piano, you will be willing to be beaten a few times, really."