you are the minutiae of the world

Xu Tingchang was very surprised when he received this call. For the first time in so many years, Qin Liang took the initiative to call him. Xu Tingchang answered it very quickly. Maybe it was because he had been a doctor for a long time. He always felt that this call revealed many differences. Unusual, even though he is now on the first date with the girl he has long admired, he still chooses to answer.

"Qin Liang, what's the matter?" Xu Tingjiang spoke first.

"No..." Qin Liang walked upstairs and said as he walked, "No, there is still."

Listening to Qin Liang's voice, Xu Tingchang was as calm and calm as ever, but he understood Qin Liang somewhat. He was different from others and had no emotions. He had gotten better over the years, but his emotions were still very weak. When talking to him, you If he didn't think about what he was going through, Xu Tingjiang's tone was very gentle. He said, "What's the matter? Tell me, maybe I can give you some advice."

"Doctor Xu, I have always followed your advice," Qin Liang said, "Sometimes your advice is useful, sometimes it is not, but I will still follow it."

"Thank you," Xu Tingjiang sincerely thanked, not only those who are helped will get joy and happiness, but also those who help others, and thanking those who give these is something that is rarely understood but should be done After all, many people in this world have an inexplicable sense of superiority when they help others. Xu Tingjiang only understood this truth after working as a doctor for many years: "So why did you call me today and want me to help you?" Woolen cloth?"

"I'm with someone," Qin Liang said, "We made love. Every time we make love, I feel amazing. This is the first time. I feel emotions with my feelings. Is it emotions? "Qin Liang paused: "I don't quite understand, maybe it's comfort, joy? Maybe other Qin Liang will explain it more clearly."

Xu Tingjiang didn't expect this answer. He had thought that good things might happen to Qin Liang before, but Qin Liang was still the same for so many years. Sometimes it was even more serious than before. Sometimes he heard Qin Liang's plain Xu Tingjiang will inevitably feel that nothing good will happen to him in the world, but nothing bad will happen to him.

"Are you in love?" Xu Tingjiang was happy for him from the bottom of his heart: "What kind of girl is she? Can you tell me?"

"No, he's a man," Qin Liang corrected Xu Tingjiang: "But I'm indeed in love."

"Congratulations," Xu Tingjiang sincerely wished Qin Liang: "Qin Liang, I hope you are happy."

"Okay, but, I was spotted," Qin Liang said, "He saw my disguise, you said before that if I want to get along with people in this world, I have to learn their expressions, but I showed my truth, but I Can't feel emotions, won't it make him happy?" Qin Liang's doubts this time are real, from the heart, and Xu Tingjiang can even hear a hint of imperceptible frustration in his tone: "But they don't appear often, Especially recently."

"You've grown up, so they won't show up often to protect you," Xu Tingjiang said, "Now that you're in love, you have someone else to protect you, your...boyfriend, so they should feel relieved."

"They didn't protect me," Qin Liang said, he didn't interrupt Xu Tingjiang eagerly, he was more like stating the facts, in a calm tone: "Because I don't know anything, that's why they came out, they hate me , they won't protect me, they just can't help it."

Xu Tingjiang did not argue with Qin Liang, he said: "Maybe I misunderstood, let's not discuss this topic today, I will teach you some other methods, the last time I said let you keep a pet, the pet is very cute, It's very healing, and maybe it will help you."

"He doesn't like it," Qin Liang said, "If he doesn't like it, I won't raise it."

"I won't do things that he doesn't like, you know," Qin Liang continued, "My mom did a lot of things that my dad didn't like."

Xu Tingjiang was silent for a while, and said: "I know, Qin Liang has always been a very good child, and Qin Liang is a child who will not disappoint anyone."

"Well," Qin Liang replied, "This is my favorite place."

They talked on the phone for a while, Xu Tingjiang gave him some medical advice, Qin Liang listened carefully and hung up the phone.

The handsome girl opposite Xu Tingchang didn't feel angry or impatient with Xu Tingchang's long phone call. She ate quietly and waited for Xu Tingchang to finish the call, then quietly watched him sink into thought after answering the phone without disturbing him .

After a while, Xu Tingjiang raised his head and smiled apologetically, "I'm sorry."

Jiang Yan shook her head and smiled softly: "Is it a patient?"

"Yes..." Xu Tingjiang paused, "Friend."

Jiang Yan stopped asking, she pointed at Xu Tingjiang's cold steak, and asked playfully, "Would you like to cut a piece for me to taste, will it be delicious when it's cold?"

Xu Tingchang couldn't help laughing. He reached out and took Jiang Yan's thin white hand on the table, and said softly, "Ah Yan, let's get married."

It's autumn, and the weather is getting colder. It's time to find someone who can be hugged to keep warm. Even the child has started to fall in love. Xu Tingjiang, who is almost 38 years old, suddenly feels that he also wants to have a home.

After listening to the methods Xu Tingjiang said, Qin Liang was as exhausted as Qin Lie forced him to see a psychologist for several hours. Qin Liang felt that he might have tried hard to memorize, but he didn't seem to remember much. That sentence was impressive.

Don't push yourself, just go with the flow and enjoy it.

Enjoy... Qin Liang put his hands on his eyes, lay on the bed, and seemed to have a dream in a trance.

The color in the dream is a dim yellow light, which lights up at night. In the dilapidated country house, it should be warm, but it is surprisingly cold. Just seeing this light, I feel a pressure on my chest. With a big stone.

There is no sound in the dream, but when you look over, you seem to be able to hear the sound, not the sound ringing in the ear, but in the mind, or the dull ringing on the chest.

The dim light comes from the dilapidated hut. If you look in, you will see a four-year-old...maybe five-year-old in the sealed window. Qingzi, lying on the ground, beside him, a long-haired woman in plain white clothes was standing in front of him, holding a cane in her hand, there were traces of blood on the cane, the long-haired woman had a crazy and hideous face , she stared at the little boy who couldn't stand up in front of her, her voice was gloomy and terrifying, as if it came from hell: "Why don't you die, you should die, I should kill you, you It's his son, but look, why are you so useless, he doesn't love you, he doesn't even come to see you, you shouldn't be alive, you should die."

Every time she hit him, she exhausted all her strength. He really thought that he would be beaten to death by her, the woman he called his mother.

But what does it mean to die?If you kill him, you'll be fine, right?

He doesn't understand, four or five years old, maybe younger, always this very small boy doesn't understand.

He wasn't killed, he just lay on the ground and couldn't get up, he saw the woman suddenly screamed and ran out, and didn't come back all night, he couldn't get up, it hurt, but it didn't seem to hurt, he couldn't tell , he was still lying on the cold ground, it was dawn, and his mother came back, her eyes were swollen from crying, her face was full of guilt, remorse, and distressed, her mother gently held him in her arms, crying and looking at him With the glaring and cruel scars on her body, my mother said sorry, sorry, sorry over and over again.My mother hugged him on the bed, and my mother bandaged his wound skillfully and carefully. My mother cooked for him, and then hugged him and coaxed him to eat. My mother fed him bite by bite. After feeding him, my mother cried again. Mom said over and over again, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Ah Liang, mom loves you, mom loves you very much, but Xiaoliang, you let mom down, mom can't help it, I'm sorry...

Later, the little boy felt that there were three people living in his body, one stood there, said nothing, did nothing, quietly watched everything happen, a little boy was beaten every day, every day Howling and suffering, a little boy ate the meals made by his mother and forgave his mother over and over again.

He knew the existence of those two Qin Liangs, and he witnessed their existence, but he didn't know where they came from.

Until many years later, their mother jumped off the building, and their father sent him to the hospital. He took a lot of medicine, and he gradually found that the little boy who had been in pain and the little boy who had always forgiven his mother didn’t like to come out very much. What to do, without them, Qin Liang doesn't know how to face the world at all.

The last scene of the dream was in Xu Tingjiang's office. He performed a hypnosis for him. He stroked Qin Liang's hair and said, "It's okay, those Qin Liang will leave slowly, but the last Qin Liang has already left after his mother left." It showed up that day."

Qin Liang woke up, he heard a knock on the door.

He got up and opened the door, his aunt told him to go downstairs for dinner, Qin Liang nodded, he stood on the stairs and turned around, he just heard footsteps behind him, it was Mu Song who had changed his clothes and went downstairs for dinner.

Qin Liang smiled and said, "Musong, are you back?"

"Well," Mu Song also stopped. Although the stairs were wide, it was still inconvenient for two men to walk side by side. He was waiting for Qin Liang to go first.

Qin Liang didn't leave, he stretched out his hand to Mu Song.

Mu Song hesitated for a while, but still reached out to hold him.

The two went downstairs one after the other and walked to the dining room together.

Mu Song moved his palm lightly, and he found that Qin Liang didn't seem to want to let go.

"How do you eat if you don't let go?" Mu Song looked at him.

Qin Liang raised his head and looked at him, and suddenly smiled and said, "It's strange, why don't you want to let go when I look at you? I want to hold you all the time."

Mu Song thought that Qin Liang was talking about love, so he laughed, bowed his head and kissed him. He suddenly felt that this love game was quite interesting, and for a moment he seemed to be back in his 20s.

But Mu Song didn't understand that Qin Liang couldn't talk about love.

The author has something to say:

It's time to start!I’m a little worried that you guys don’t understand Xiaoliang’s illness, so I’ll try my best to make it clear. This illness is real. I’ve encountered it in real life, and it’s also the inspiration for writing this mask, and then I’ve processed it a bit. , but the treatment method is made up by me, don't be too particular, hee hee

There will be no sweet follow-up in this article, and you will understand after reading it. Some be can start over because they should have been happy, and some encounters were a mistake... Ah... I'm too wordy...