Tang Seng is a cook

Before Wukong went to the South China Sea, Li Shan's old mother took Manjusri and Samantabhadra to the Guanyin Cave in Putuo Mountain to seek the bad luck of Guanyin.

When the three old mothers of Lishan were taken to the back mountain of Zizhu Forest by the mountain god Dahei angrily, at a glance, the three of them lined up the black line, Guanyin and Taiyi real person were fighting with dust, and it was impossible to fight.

Mu Zha took his younger brothers and sisters to finish the salute, secretly stabbed the dragon girl, and asked the younger junior sister to greet people, but he sneaked away by himself, and ran to the door to watch the sky with Da Hei and Xiao Wu.

Li Shan's old mother is a fierce old lady who has always been rude to boys like them, but she can only show a good face to female dolls like Longnu.

Sure enough, when Li Shan's old mother saw Long Nu, her expression became amiable. She took Long Nu by the hand and walked into the gazebo, while carrying out daily abduction: "Dragon Nu, your master is out of tune again? Listen to my mother's advice. What's the future with him? It's better to come to my mother and learn all the arts and martial arts! Girls, if you learn it, you can go to the battlefield and fight on the frontier, and you can beat the heartless man when you go home! The little whip is crisp! How comfortable and refreshing was that little life? Isn’t it better than being bored in this purple bamboo forest every day, facing your stupid master and brother? Hey, yes, I haven’t seen you for a few days, how is your purple bamboo forest? It's getting heavier? Where did the two crooked melons and dates come from just now?"

The old mother of Lishan looked back, and the crooked melon Dahei and Lizao Zhao Wu pretended not to hear anything. One was standing and the other was squatting in a flowerpot, silently guarding the mountain gate. The sunshine here is so good, it is the same as the sunshine yesterday and before, and it feels good to be in the sun.

The dragon girl laughed awkwardly, put away her demeanor of grabbing food with her senior brother, took Li Shan's mother's arm, and said weakly: "Mother, I am weak, I can't go to the battlefield, I can't do it!"

Li Shan's old mother clicked her tongue, and she became more and more excited as she spoke, and she said with great interest: "What's modest! I don't think you are weak. Just now, the move you made to push Mu Zha to the ground was very agile!"

Afterwards, the heroic figure who suppressed Mu Zha and gave him a fat beating was even more vigorous!She stood there happily for a long time and couldn't bear to disturb her.

Long Nu's stupid senior brother was so beaten up by Long Nu, he had no power to parry or fight back!

Since ancient times, heroes have produced girls!

Her old mother of Lishan has always had a good eye, and this dragon girl is a good seed suitable for conquering the world!

Go to the lower realm, sooner or later you will be the leader of the army!Overlord!Dominate the world!

The more Li Shan's mother thought about it, the more excited she became, and she wanted to say more, but Manjusri coughed lightly from behind, and pulled at Li Shan's sleeve. Only then did Li Shan's mother come to her senses, put away the smile on her face, and reluctantly put on a pose again. The expression "I'm very angry" just looks a bit fake.

Longnu's noodles are very green, it's too much to lose face and run around all over the world!

Turn around and wait for the person to leave, and beat the senior brother again to vent your anger!

The real Taiyi was already tired from beating, and when he saw someone coming, he immediately shouted to stop: "You have guests and guests! Let's make gestures next time!"

Guanyin didn't stop at all, didn't even distinguish between gods, and concentrated on beating people.

He snorted coldly: "I'm very busy all day long, I don't have time to hang out with you! I won't accompany you after this time! If you beat you down today, you can lie here and rest honestly! Save the whole day Call me into trouble!"

Daoist Taiyi said, "Kill brothers and brothers! I'm devastated! I'm going to see my little Wuyou later! Take it easy, oh, oh, oh!"

The more he talked, the more distracted he became, and he was beaten to the ground by Guanyin within a few strokes, and he lay on the grass and pretended to be dead.

Guanyin took the magic weapon, snorted coldly and said: "Don't put your mind on that little apprentice of yours, you should practice and improve yourself anyway! Don't wait for him to heal, you die again!"

Daoist Taiyi spread his hands and feet, sighed, and said, "Oh, what I owed him in my previous life..."

Guanyin hated iron for being weak, spat: "Where did you come from in your previous life! If there was a previous life, I don't know what evil I did to know you such a bastard!"

Taiyi struggled and raised his head to stare at him: "Did someone say that about your senior brother?" Ouch, his neck hurts so much!

Guanyin snorted coldly, and muttered in a low voice: "This is the ball that fell into the soup pot, and you are not happy to call you a bastard!" Turned around and left.

Taiyi Daoist was so angry that he lay on the ground and hummed: "I heard I told you you brat..."

Avalokitesvara ignored him and walked towards the gazebo. When she saw Li Shan's old mother and Manjusri Puxian, she bowed deeply: "I'm sorry to trouble you, can everything go smoothly?"

Is Tang Seng okay?

Have you been hooked up by a womanizer?

Li Shan's old mother's complexion was distorted, she gritted her teeth and said, "You two have been fighting and bickering here for a long time? You don't know what's going on down there?"

While talking, I said silently in my heart: If you want to be angry, you can be angry, you can't be excited, you can't be excited, oops, that girl brought tea, so cute!

The dragon girl served tea to the four elders with a smile, and also sent a cup to Daoist Taiyi thoughtfully. She was afraid that he would be uncomfortable lying on the ground, so she took out a tiger skin mat and gave it to him. Fan Zai would definitely find this tiger skin very familiar.

It was the skin of a tiger that Wukong jumped out of Wuzhi Mountain, and was later thrown by the monkey to the original Luojia mountain god. When the former mountain god left, he was detained by the Bodhisattva.

Just works!

Taiyi got up lazily, sat on the tiger skin cushion drinking tea and basking in the sun, just like his nephew, he was very happy.

The Bodhisattva frowned, and said, "It's not long since we came back from Heaven, and we really didn't pay attention to the Tang Monk and his disciples. My mother is so angry, but they broke the precepts?"

So angry.

As a result, Li Shan's old mother stood up suddenly, slapped the table and said, "It's more than that! It's even worse than that!"

Showing hypocrisy in front of the woman, her Li Shan old mother has never met such a nasty person since she was born!

Tsk, I used too much force, my hands hurt so much! !

Anyway!That Zhu Wuneng was going to piss her off!

The Bodhisattva's brows became tighter and tighter, thinking that Tang Sanzang really had a heart for the woman, his heart was full of anger, and he turned into a mirror of water, intending to replay the experience of Tang monk and his disciples.

Unexpectedly, at this time, the great sage Sun Wukong rushed in as if he had blown up the temple all the way. Before he saw anyone, he shouted loudly: "Bodhisattva! Bodhisattva, help! My master is dying! Tang Sanzang is dying of illness! Bodhisattva, help!"

Avalokitesvara's mood suddenly became chaotic, his hand shook, and the water mirror turned into a puddle of clear water and fell to the ground.

At this time, Wukong had already run in, his clothes were disheveled, his eyes were red and swollen, and the hair on his face was swayed by the wind. The Bodhisattva was startled, and he waved away Mu Zha, who was following the monkey, and Da Hei, who was holding Zhao Wu. Going down, walked down the steps a few steps, and asked: "What's wrong with being so flustered? What's wrong with your master?"

The monkey's eyes were red with anxiety, and he quickly described Zhuang Fan's symptoms. The Bodhisattva thumped in his heart. He breathed a sigh of relief, and the monkey couldn't help being angry when he saw him standing still, but for the sake of Master, he still patiently said: "But I beg Bodhisattva to save me, Master! Let's go quickly, it will be too late!" , with tears in one eye.

The Bodhisattva patted the monkey's shoulder and comforted him: "Wukong, don't worry." How could the monkey not be in a hurry? Hearing this, before the Bodhisattva could say anything, he jumped three feet high and said in a trembling voice. : "What do you mean? My master, Tang Sanzang, he, he is dead?"

The Bodhisattva was angry and funny, and quickly cursed: "Fart! Who said he is dead! Although your master is very dangerous this time, but he has a chance. He is already healed at this time. Don't worry, I will take you later." Go back and meet him! You go to Longnu's place to have a cup of tea first, and take a breather." It would be best if you can tidy up your hair by the way, and have a good time, now you are so ugly!

The monkey's heart was like a rock thrown from a high mountain, going up and down, half dead by being fooled, immediately paralyzed on the ground and didn't want to move, and was dragged away by the dragon girl.

The old mother of Lishan was very satisfied with Longnu's actions. When Longnu dragged the monkey by her side, the old mother showed a very kind smile on her face, and saw that Longnu was trembling all over, so she seemed to have done nothing. , ran away quickly.

Wukong, Wukong continues to play dead.

Seeing that Tang Monk was fine, the Bodhisattva relaxed half of his mind, transformed into the water mirror again, and read what happened yesterday when Li Shan's old mother and Manjusri Puxian went down to earth.

I couldn't hold it back for a while, and looked a little more. The corners of my mouth turned up higher and higher, and I couldn't help laughing out loud. I was afraid that Li Shan's old mother would go crazy. Finally, I swung my robe sleeves, closed the mirror, and said with righteous indignation: "This Tang Monk is too much! When I go down, I must give him a good lesson! Let him repair his useless apprentices!"

Li Shan's old mother was eager for him to leave, and hurriedly said: "Then you go quickly! Let's go! Don't delay!" When Guanyin is gone, she can continue to hook up with the dragon girl and go back to Lishan!

Guanyin couldn't see through her small thoughts, and hurriedly said: "Holy Mother, how can you not go together, but you don't know, we go down this time, there is another chance, let's go, let's go together, it should be ours." Good fortune has arrived!"

The Bodhisattva said in his heart that he was just catching up with Wuzhuang Temple to eat the fruit. Anyone who doesn't go is a fool, and it's okay if he doesn't go. You are not allowed to stay in his purple bamboo forest and play wild and poach corners!

God is annoying!

Li Shan's old mother and the others couldn't help but feel their hearts move, and then they looked at each other, they all understood and looked happy, and agreed to go together if there was anything wrong.

The Bodhisattva then turned back to the lazy Taiyi and said: "Brother, don't hold back, you go down with me, just in time to see Wuyou, Wuyou also has a chance!"

I'll give you two grandchildren in one go, and we'll see if you're scared to death or happy!

Just about to take someone out, Guanyin slapped his forehead and said, "Ah, I have to bring something to Tang Sanzang, everyone later!"

Taiyi yelled from behind to ask Wuyou what the opportunity was, but he didn't have time to answer.

After a while, Guanyin reappeared hurriedly, carrying a storage bag bulging in his hand, and said to the crowd in high spirits: "Let's go, let's go to the lower realm!"

Taiyi and Lishan's old mother, Manjusri Puxian, all looked at Guanyin with such an expression of -0-, but within a moment, this guy actually changed into a suit of clothes, just change it, and changed back to men's clothing?

Didn't you like to wear women's clothing 8000 years ago?Why did it suddenly change back again? I'm not used to it.

Daoist Taiyi approached cautiously and said, "Brother, why did you suddenly change your clothes?"

Guanyin squinted at him: "What? What's not good about it?"

How could Taiyi dare to offend him at this time, he quickly put up a thumbs up and said: "Everywhere is beautiful, my brother is very handsome!"

The Bodhisattva snorted at him again, turned around and ignored him, and said to Li Shan's old mother and Manjusri Puxian: "Everyone please first, let's go!"

When the group arrived at the door, Guanyin picked up Wukong, who was still paralyzed on the ground, and all the immortals came to Longevity Mountain.

At this time, the sky was getting dark, Zhuang Fan had a good night's sleep, he had already woken up, and felt that nothing happened, but Ba Jie said that he was weak and needed to be raised again, so he didn't let him move, and he was still lying in bed.

Zhuang Fan would rather he was still asleep.

When he woke up, his son not only stole the family ginseng fruit tree back, but also gave birth to two children with the two apprentices?This was a bigger blow than hearing that he had to be a vegetarian for the rest of his life. The world was still full of malice towards him!

It turned out that he had just graduated from the Time and Space University, and now he is in his early twenties with this identity, so he is only in his 40s together?He turned out to be a grandfather! ?

What is the law of heaven! !

I really want to catch those two bastards who are refusing to be mothers one by one and slap their asses!Think this is a play house!Raising a child has never been so easy!

Now he doesn't want to know how these two children came to be, he just wants to know how to raise them. Although he is known as the king of children who have lived in the village for thousands of years, he has never raised a palm-sized doll!

Zhuang Fan trembled and said in a hoarse voice: "Fellow Daoist Hongye, I don't know something, and I want to ask you a question or two!"

That Hongye smiled slightly: "Elder, please tell me, you are welcome!"

Zhuang Fan said: "These two children have been sleeping, is there any hindrance? I have never raised such immature babies, and they have special constitutions and extraordinary backgrounds. How can I feed them so that they can grow up healthily and smoothly?"

After all, these two children were born out of ginseng fruit trees, so how can this tree know something?

Hongye sighed in her heart, but this Elder Tang was kind-hearted, he didn't exclude others, and he didn't do everything with kindness, which was rare, so he said in detail: "Elder Tang, don't worry too much, these two Babies are so lethargic because their bones and blood have not yet grown together. If you want to be born like a mortal baby, you still need the mother's body to continue to conceive!"

Seeing that Wu Youwu forgot to stop arguing, Hongye looked at them together, remembered their quarrel, couldn't help but smiled knowingly, and continued: "These two babies are different from mortal wombs, I think at least they will be reborn in the mother's womb Ten or eight years."

This is what he said less.

After hearing this, everyone looked at Wuyou in unison, talking about the one who can't get out of the mother's womb, this is the ancestor, um, as expected of his own birth, the blue is better than the blue!

Wuyou felt very bad when he heard it, and suddenly had a feeling of wanting to slip away.

At this moment, there was a sudden commotion outside the tent, and someone shouted loudly: "Tang Sanzang! You are a bald thief! Get out of here! Where did you steal my ginseng fruit tree! Good you Tang Sanzang, Tang Sanzang!" Sanzang, you do one thing in front of the other! You said that your mortal body is not worthy of my ginseng fruit! Then you turned around and stole my ancient tree! My tree with the same lifespan as heaven and earth! Why are you being stared at? Come on! Tang Sanzang, you bastard! Give me back my tree!"

The scolding was crying and singing, it was very lively, Wuyou was furious when he heard it, he got up suddenly, took out the Huntian silk and was about to fight, Zhuang Fan hurriedly said: "Wuyou! I lost something, it's not okay Barking twice? Stop still and look like a father!"

Seeing that what Zhuang Fan said was interesting, Hongye couldn't help but smirked, and helped Zhuang Fan stop Wuyou, Wuyou snorted angrily and took Huntianling away, and stood still.

Wu Wang and Ba Jie were also furious, but when they saw that Zhuang Fan was about to get up, they hurried over to persuade him: "Master, it's just right for you, don't go, the big brother will be back later, tell the big brother to beat him up!", " Shut up, senior brother is not a thug, Bodhisattva will come later and ask Bodhisattva to fix that bastard!"

Hongye said, "Don't be impatient, everyone, this matter started all because of me, so let me talk about it!"

Zhuang Fan hurriedly said: "You just stay here and don't act, what if you are caught again?" But he said suspiciously: "Could it be that you were kidnapped by Wuyou? Didn't you still want to Let's go back?"

His youngest son is stubborn, so he has to do what he decides. Sometimes he is almost like a robber, but what if his family doesn't want to move?

Hongye raised her fist to cover her mouth and coughed, blocking a trace of a smile. It is true that she was kidnapped, but, "I really stayed there enough. I don't want to go back when I come out this time!"

Zhuang Fan was already struggling to stand up at this time, walked over and patted him on the shoulder and said, "Then stay here with Wu You at ease, he has toys there, you two play for a while, I will go out to meet this Zhenyuan son!"

That Hongye was stunned. For thousands of years, he thought that he was extremely powerful and invincible, but he didn't expect that there would be a day when someone would hug him behind him and protect him, and even be treated as a child.

It wasn't a bad feeling, though.

If Zhuang Fan knew what he was thinking about, he would definitely not be able to help complaining: If you want to be treated as an adult, you should always make your height and figure bigger first, okay?He is as tall as Nezha, how can he be convincing to say that he is invincible in the world! ?

Hongye is also very wronged, this is not the sudden arrival of the little friend Wuyou, he is too short, he is doing this to accommodate the little friend.

In short, it's all Wuyou's fault!

Seeing that the master couldn't be persuaded, the three apprentices hurriedly wrapped Zhuang Fan up tightly. In the warm spring sun, they even put on a leather hat for him, and Zhuang Fan was covered in white sweat in an instant.

Hongye originally wanted to say that there is no need to be like this, he is fine, but the master who saw Wuyou also looked helpless, but he was full of connivance and let the apprentices walk around him to work, and there was a smile on his mouth, and he couldn't help smiling, standing by and watching , don't say anything anymore.

Zhuang Fan originally wanted to tell his son to stay in the tent without going out, but Wu You said, "Father, I'll follow your command, why don't you move around?"

Zhuang Fan thought for a while and said, "Well, you can go out, but you can't talk nonsense, can you do it?"

Wu You nodded and said, "Father, you believe me!"

Zhuang Fan touched him, then opened the curtain, and Bajie Wuwang supported him one by one from left and one from right, Wu You suppressed the formation, and the four masters and apprentices went out together.

Zhen Yuanzi was jumping up and down and cursing vigorously, no one came out of the tent for a long time, he thought it was Tang Monk and his disciples who were guilty, and even yelled so loudly, seeing that someone finally came out, he snorted bitterly, Folded arms and waited.

Unexpectedly, when Tang Sanzang came out, Zhen Yuanzi was stunned. The person who was fine in the morning now had a sickly face, flushed face, skin on his mouth, and changed into a thick fur coat and a fur hat. Weak and unable to walk, he was helped out by two apprentices.

Zhen Yuanzi was stunned, unable to speak for a moment, why suddenly fell ill?

Don't you know that Zhuang Fan's face is flushed because of heat, his weakness is pretended, and the skinless mouth is actually caused by the high fever before.

Zhuang Fan walked two steps with the help of his apprentice, and Wu Wang took out a Taishi chair—made by Zhuang Fan and the carpenter—and put it on the ground, and helped him to sit down.

Zhuang Fan sat comfortably. Apart from the heat, it couldn't be more comfortable. He asked coldly, "Daoist Master Zhen Yuanzi came to my door to beg for those two ginseng fruits?"

The voice was still a little hoarse, and he turned to Wuyou and said, "Bring it back to the Taoist priest!"

Wuyou blinked, quickly answered "Yes!", and was about to step forward.

Zhen Yuanzi was going to die of anger, he jumped up and said sharply: "Tang Sanzang! Don't avoid the important and take the light! You give me back the ginseng fruit tree!"

Zhuang Fan sneered coldly, and said: "The Daoist priest is really ridiculous! Did you watch me steal? Did you watch me chop it up? Suspecting someone stealing for no reason, is he looking at me from afar so you can bully him? As long as I have your ginseng fruit tree here A branch, I will pay you my life!"

There are no branches, he has a big living person turned from a whole tree, a little bit, you will be mad at you!

Zhen Yuanzi choked when he heard it, he really didn't look at it, but, "Except for you master and apprentice, there is no one who has the ability to pass by here! Is it not you master and apprentice, or who?"

Zhuang Fan said: "I didn't expect the Taoist priest to value the poor monk so much, but I just disappointed you. After you left, the poor monk suddenly had a high fever, and the high fever persisted, and he fell into a coma. If you hadn't come to call the door and scold me, I wouldn't be able to wake up." , Thank you very much, Daoist!"

After hearing this, Zhen Yuanzi's face was as red as a piece of cloth, he couldn't speak, and in the end, he could only argue powerlessly: "It wasn't you, it was your apprentice who did it!"

Zhuang Fan sneered and said, "All my apprentices smell like medicine, you have such a good nose, can't you smell it?"

Oh, it's too bullying, Zhen Yuanzi is about to cry, Zhuang Fan thought with a guilty conscience.

Zhen Yuanzi was really about to cry, he didn't believe that this had nothing to do with Tang Seng and his disciples!

After thinking for a while, he struggled and said, "It's either the three of them, or your big disciple Sun Wukong!!! Where is he! Tell him to come out! I think he stole flat peaches back then! Stealing elixir! Now he even steals my ginseng fruit tree! He can't change his thief nature from the very beginning!"

This time the gunpowder nest was poked!Zhuang Fan was furious, he slapped the armrest of the chair and stood up: "Zhen Yuanzi! Shut up!"

When the holy monk was furious, he was thundered, and a purple thunder slammed down out of nowhere, right next to Zhen Yuanzi and passing by!

Zhen Yuanzi was stunned.

Wu You was at the side, seeing that the senior brother was implicated in this matter, and Zhen Yuanzi slandered the senior brother out of thin air, he couldn't help feeling ashamed and annoyed, with tears in his eyes, lowered his head, and was disturbed.

At this time, the curtain of the tent was lifted, and Hongye came out. With his sleeves on his hands, he said calmly, "Zhenyuan, you have passed!"