Tang Seng is a cook

Knowing that he was invincible, the golden retriever turned into a prototype with a groan, prostrated himself on the ground, clasped his head in his paws, and assumed a shameless posture, refusing to move any more.

Wukong stabbed him with a golden cudgel, and said: "My old grandson is not such a useless old man, get up and fight again!"

The golden retriever blinked his big watery eyes, looked over pitifully, his big head froze, and shook his head vigorously: No!pain!

Bajie said: "Brother, I can't bear to see him look like a bear."

The Golden Retriever heard this, whimpered, and thought that he was not pitiful. He went to the lower realm for a few days and captured the Golden Sacred Palace without even touching it.

She is simply the first useless goblin in the world.

Seeing that the golden-haired jerk surrendered, Bajie said, "Brother, when will the Bodhisattva come? Let's wait here?"

Wukong scratched his head and said: "Supposedly it should be here, could it be that we didn't beat hard enough? Why don't we try another beating?"

Try it, try it, the two ignored the golden retriever's wailing, put away their weapons, rode up and beat the fat dog up again, as if they were playing around, picking butts, thighs, how resistant is this kind of meat The place where he hit was hard, and the Golden Retriever was also clever, and howls were earth-shattering!

Bodhisattva did not come either.

The monkey moved around a bit, and it was so hot that white mist came out from its body. It squatted there and pawed the golden retriever's paw, poked his fat belly, and said, "Hey, fat dog, is it because your master doesn't want you anymore? If so, put Pull it back, let's eat the stew!"

Golden Retriever's belly rushed up, his tongue drooped, and he hummed tearfully. He felt bitter, and he didn't want to talk.

Bajie squatted on the other side, and said strangely: "You say that you look like a dog, and you are in vain of the reputation of a dog. People say that a dog is a loyal minister, but you are better off. Leave your master and go to help the enemy. Are you right? Stupid? Are you a dog? Or is it just a stupid breed of yours?"

Jin Maoyu got angry, got up and argued, "What do you know! The mother of the Buddha is very powerful in the Western Heaven, and my Lord is just a little Bodhisattva who lives in the South China Sea and has not gone to the Western Heaven for a long time. Now my Lord's brother Jin Chan is not in Xitian, haven’t you heard the saying, there is no one in the court, it is difficult to do things! My Lord is tired of running around every day, only knows how to do stupid things, and the Buddha doesn’t know, what benefits can I get? I will give the Buddha mother If this is done, then the Buddha Mother owes my master! Whenever he encounters troubles in the future, he will have to weigh it in his heart, and dare not be too difficult to be my master! Otherwise, if he owes karma, how can it be so easy to pay back?"

Wukong and Bajie looked at each other, and said: "Unexpectedly, you dog, you are stupid, but you are also a little loyal."

Golden Retriever wagged his tail triumphantly and said, "That's it!"

Suddenly he reacted, and said angrily: "Since you know, why don't you hurry up and get out of here! I've ruined my big business, and I'll have good fruit for you in the future!"

Wukong smacked him on the back of the head unceremoniously, and said, "You don't even think you're stupid, but you said it was the Bodhisattva who asked me to catch you! What are you talking about!"

The golden retriever was so dizzy from being photographed, he groaned aggrievedly, and lay down again, not daring to make a sound.

Bajie also said: "Call you stupid, you are still energetic, the Buddha's mother said that the phoenix will be demolished for three years, you scare the king and drive him to live in the temple for three years, how good is it? It’s like robbing someone’s Jinsheng Palace. Don’t you know that the king has three wives and four concubines and 72 concubines. You robbed a Jinsheng Palace, and they also have Jade Palace and Silver Palace. If the king is ruthless, you are not blind Delay work?"

When the golden-haired man heard this, his eyes lit up, and he sat up again and said, "Wonderful! As expected of Marshal Tianpeng, such a plan is very good! Why didn't I think of it?!"

Wukong and Bajie said mercilessly in unison: "Because you are stupid!"

The stupid dog lay down, covered his eyes with two paws, and pretended to be dead.

The three of them got together and waited for the Bodhisattva to come. It was very boring, so Wukong said, "There is nothing left and right, let's play poker for a while!"

Bajie's eyes lit up, and he said, "Brother, you have a good idea! Give it a go!"

The golden retriever shivered in fright, and said tremblingly: "Poker is not a nickname you gave me, right?"

Bajie rolled his eyes and said, "Whoever has the spare time to beat you up, just watch, we'll teach you how to play!"

The three of them happened to come to fight the landlord, and Wukong and Bajie bullied Jin Maojiu, who was a novice, and beat him to the ground.

The two brothers won all the small treasury that Golden Retriever had hidden all these years, and in the end, they almost plucked out their hair to pay off the debt.

Wukong said: "You bastard, it's useless for us to hold it, so let's do it, you'll put a note on your face if you lose!"

Golden Retriever thought about it, this idea is good, post it, and there is a lot of meat.

So when Mu Zha Long Nu replaced Guanyin and rushed to pick up the golden retriever back to the South China Sea, I saw this idiot, sitting with Monkey King and Zhu Wuneng, shaking poker wildly, and was pasted with white notes all over his face. When the autumn wind blows, there is a rustling sound, very...

funny?

Mu Zha laughed, Dragon Girl was angry and happy, Wu Kong saw them coming, threw the poker away, and said: "No more games, no more games! You lost!"

He took a piece of paper by hand, wiped some paste on it, and pasted it on the golden retriever again.

The silly dog ​​hadn't reacted yet, and said, "I can win this game! Why don't you play anymore!"

After being slapped on the back of the head by Mu Zha, he fell down.

Mu Zha said to Wu Kong: "You guys are having fun here!"

Wukong smiled and said: "Who told Bodhisattva not to come to pick up this guy earlier, Bajie and I have been beating him for a long time, we can't beat him to death!"

Bajie also said: "Hui An, why are you and Shancai here, Bodhisattva?"

Mu Zha scratched his head and said, "Hey, don't mention it. My master went back and said that he was very sleepy. He went back to the room and said he would go to sleep for a while, but he would not come out after closing the door. Just now he woke up and went out to say that he would come. I saw that he was very sleepy, his eyes were red, so I told him to rest at home, and I came with Longnu, so it was delayed."

Wukong wondered: "But what ritual has happened recently, the Bodhisattva is tired?"

Mu Zha and Long Nu looked at each other, and said: "No, Master just went to attend the apprenticeship ceremony of Wurui Junior Brother, and then came to Master Uncle, and didn't go to do anything."

Bajie speculated: "Could it be that the Bodhisattva drank too much in Lingtai Mountain, and the wind blew on the way to the mortal world, and then turned back?"

After hearing this, Long Nu said, "Brother, Ba Jie is right."

Mu Zha also said: "Well, there is a possibility, but we are still worried in our hearts, so we took the golden retriever back! I won't go to see Master Jin Chan, please tell Long Nu for me, tell Master Blame him."

Wukong said: "It's okay, my master is not the one to argue."

Mu Zha said again: "Oh, by the way, my master still has a letter for the uncle, you can take it."

After finishing speaking, he took out a thick letter from his pocket and gave it to Wukong.

Wukong put it away, and the four said goodbye. Mu Zha and Long Nu returned to the South China Sea with the dejected and penniless golden retriever with a face full of white paper.

Seeing them leave, Bajie whispered to Wukong, "Brother, our paste is specially made, and it won't fall off even if it sticks to the hair. You stuck the face of the golden retriever, and he couldn't pull it off. How can the Bodhisattva see it?"

Wukong rubbed his chin and said: "I would like to bet and admit defeat. He is willing to play with us. If he loses, he can't blame us."

The two brothers giggled, feeling a sense of accomplishment in a prank.

Sending the Golden Retriever Sai Taisui away, Wukong and Bajie went to look for the Golden Sacred Palace, and they found it in a dilapidated, dark cave. The Golden Sacred Palace was lying on the ground dying, unconscious do not wake up.

But it turned out that because the golden retriever only ate raw food and drank raw water, Jin Shenggong was pampered and pampered since he was a child, and he drank tea on weekdays, and the best mountain spring water or flower petals were used to make tea. Dew and snow water, how can I bear the bloody smell, and being taken captive, I am shocked and angry, and I refuse to eat it, three days have passed, and the water rice has not beaten my teeth, and I am already hungry and fainted .

Wukong saw that the Jinsheng Palace was half unconscious, and it was not easy to reach out to help him, so he discussed with Bajie, drew a circle on the ground to enclose the Jinsheng Palace, and the two returned to Zhuziguo's palace first.

It didn't take much time to fight the goblins, and all this time was wasted fighting the landlords. At this time, the sun was westward, and it was already halfway through Shen Shi, and the king had been waiting anxiously for a long time. A bowl of bird's nest porridge is waiting impatiently.

Wukong and Bajie fell into the clouds, and the king was pacing in the corridor. His eyes lit up when he saw the two of them, but he didn't look at the Jinsheng Palace, and he couldn't help being disappointed, so he hurriedly asked: "Two holy monks, can you find Jinsheng?" Palace, catch that demon?"

Wukong said: "The goblin has caught it, and it has already been dealt with. Jinsheng Palace has also been found, but I just watched, the situation is not very good."

As soon as these words came out, the king was so frightened that his legs and feet went weak, and he almost collapsed on the ground. The personal servant behind him rushed over to help him, and helped the king to sit on the chair.

The king of the Zhuzi Kingdom cheered up and asked tremblingly: "I don't know what happened to my wife, Jin Shenggong, her, what happened to her?"

Wukong said: "It looks like she hasn't suffered any injuries, but her lips are chapped and her complexion is sallow. It looks like she hasn't eaten or drank for three or two days. If you go hungry, you can just bury her when you bring her back."

When the king heard this, his heart felt as if a knife had been twisted. He clutched his chest and burst into tears again.

Bajie said, "What's the use of crying? We came back because we thought about the difference between men and women. We don't want to be rude to Jinsheng Palace so that you can get ready and find two personal maids that your mother can trust, and two more powerful ones." Old mother, a sedan chair, let’s set off now to pick up Jinsheng Palace!”

The king cried: "The Qilin mountain is three thousand miles away from here. The monks stepped on the clouds and went away in a short while. The maid, mother and sedan chair, who are small and weak, with feet as big as palms, how can they get there? I'm afraid." When it arrives, my Golden Saint Palace will also starve to death! It's the fault of the widow! The widow is incompetent!"

Bajie snorted angrily: "If you piss on the cat again, Jin Shenggong might really starve to death! I'll tell you to prepare someone, and you can take them with you. If you howl again, we really don't care! "

The king couldn't help being overjoyed when he heard this: "Since that's the case, my widow will also go! My widow will personally go to welcome the Jinsheng Palace and return the court..."

After saying that, he struggled to get up from the chair, and went to pull Bajie's arm.

Seeing him making a fuss, Zhuang Fan quickly stood up and stopped him, saying: "Your Majesty, calm down!"

The king said with tears in his eyes: "Holy Monk, tell your apprentice quickly and tell him to take me there!"

Zhuang Fan shook his head and said: "Your Majesty, it's not that we are unreasonable as teachers and apprentices, but Your Majesty is the body of a real dragon. My two apprentices can still travel with a mortal or a weak woman. If I take Your Majesty with me, I'm afraid that your Majesty's dragon spirit is so heavy that you can't fly!"

Zhuang Fan also noticed at this time that the king of the Zhuzi Kingdom is just an immature imbecile!

Sure enough, the king was disappointed when he heard that he couldn't fly, and lamented, "It's because I have no chance..."

Zhuang Fanxin said, he was almost deceived by you, alas, the husband with such a temper at the Jinsheng Palace booth is also miserable.

At this time, the personal servant had already ordered to go down, and the manpower had already arrived, and there were bearers carrying the phoenix chariot.

There are four people, not many, but the phoenix chariot is very luxurious, extremely tall, with a heavy body, inlaid with gold and jade, wide and thick wooden boards, inside can sit and lie down, with a coffee table back, squeeze, at least you can sit Four or five people.

When Wukong saw it, he said, "Hey! That's ridiculous! It's a small sedan chair in green clothes, and it can be used by the Jinsheng Palace. With such a heavy object, is it possible to exhaust my brother to death?"

Even if it doesn't bother him, he doesn't want to get used to this mortal problem.

The attendant next to the phoenix chariot was too listening, and said in a panic: "The mother of our country has always traveled with this standard of etiquette..." This eunuch is a little chief in charge of the palace's carriage and horse expenses.

Bajie raised his eyebrows and said, "Aren't you stupid? When the goblin kidnapped you, he also prepared eight big sedan chairs for your Golden Holy Palace, and more than a dozen little maidservants to wait on them?"

Wukong laughed and said, "Your Majesty, someone really doesn't want your Jinsheng Palace to return to court? I said, why don't you ask the poor Jinsheng Palace to come back, and we will beg the Bodhisattva to accept it." It is better for Jin Shenggong to be a female disciple than to suffer in this palace!"

When the two said what they said, the chief eunuch turned pale with fright, knelt down on the ground, and kowtowed to the king repeatedly: "The villain has no such intentions, Your Majesty is clearly aware!"

The king's face was dark, and he said: "I don't know, I don't know, I don't have time to tangle with you today, go there and kneel first."

The chief eunuch was in such a panic, he crawled to the side and knelt down, and someone quickly brought a small sedan chair in green clothes. The king was worried, so he went up to check it himself. He saw that the cushion was soft and the sedan chair was firm, and he touched it carefully. Simply this time there is no serious problem, so I can rest assured.

In the end, the king didn't ask to bring many people, but only ordered one maid and one nun, and handed them over to Wukong and Bajie, begging him earnestly, only asking for the safe return of Jinsheng Palace.

Seeing that Zhuang Fan was really disturbed, he sat there shaking his head, chanted a Buddha, and refused to say anything.

The king stood on the porch, watching Wukong and Bajie from a distance, wrapping up the people and the sedan chair and going away, he let out a long sigh, and sat down on the chair with a gloomy expression on his face.

Seeing that he was downcast, Zhuang Fan wanted to find something to do for the incomprehensible king, so he said: "Your Majesty, the poor monk Guan, just checked the sedan chair, but you are afraid that someone will do something secretly?"

The king sighed, and said: "Jinshenggong is my wife, I know, there are countless people, wishing she would come back, thinking about her position."

Zhuang Fan said: "It is inevitable that fame and fortune will move people's hearts since ancient times. It's just that the poor monk feels that it is useless for His Majesty to inspect the small sedan chair in green clothes."

The king wondered, "Oh? I don't know what the holy monk has to say?"

Zhuang Fan said: "Who would have thought that the mother of a country can sit on such a simple thing? I hurriedly called for a sedan chair, but it was too late to start. If your majesty is really suspicious, it is better to check the phoenix chariot. The poor monk remembers that the phoenix chariot It took a long time to prepare the chariot."

When the king heard this, he shivered, his complexion was pale, his eyes were not right, revealing such a vicious look, he patted the handle of the chair, got up and ran to the phoenix chariot parked alone in the courtyard.

The chief eunuch was kneeling beside him obediently, but when he saw the king and the holy monk whispering a few words, he went straight to the phoenix chariot. He couldn't help but panic, and he swooped, hugged the king's thigh, and said, "Your Majesty Your Majesty can't do it! The phoenix chariot is for the empress to sit on, and it's more sinister, how can your majesty touch it?"

This not only made Zhuang Fan laugh in his heart, but the king was also angry. If you want this eunuch to say, women in the world are the most sinister, so why don't you marry a wife?

The king kicked the eunuch away, and said bitterly: "If the widow sees something wrong, you and the master behind you will die tragically today!"

That was too much monitoring, his whole body went limp, his eyes rolled, and he passed out. As soon as the king waved his hand, someone had already stepped forward and dragged him aside, and kept him under strict supervision.

The king's personal servant, the one who went to meet Zhuang Fan at the door, also murmured in his heart, stepped forward and said, "Your Majesty, it seems that the phoenix chariot has indeed been tampered with, Your Majesty should not touch it lightly. If you accidentally hurt the dragon's body, what to do, Jin Shenggong will also feel sorry for you when he comes back."

The king waved his hand and said: "I just want to see how they want to deal with my wife, so that I can see their skills!"

The servant had no choice but to say: "Your Majesty, if you trust the old slave, why don't you call the old slave?"

Zhuang Fan was also curious, got up and came over, intending to visit this ancient palace fighting, what kind of fighting method it was.

He said Shi Shiran from the side: "Your Majesty, I am not afraid that this sedan chair will hurt people. The poor monk is looking at it. If you don't think you have offended the Jinsheng Palace, you might as well just throw that person in and tell him to sit here." Just lift up the sedan chair and walk around twice, the so-called treating the body according to the way of the person, as the Buddhists say, the cycle of cause and effect is nothing more than this."

The king clapped his hands and said, "The holy monk is quite reasonable!"

With a wave of his hand, he told someone to silence the eunuch and throw him directly into the phoenix chariot.

The eunuch's eyes were frightened, he was still struggling in the hands of the Imperial Forest Army, but when he got on the phoenix chariot, his whole body was stiff and he didn't dare to move, he was as dumb as a clay sculpture, he straightened his back and seemed to be squatting on the soft cushion .

When the king saw this, he felt resentment in his heart, and he ordered the Imperial Forest Army: "Go up the gun, tell him to lie down on the phoenix chariot, and lie down firmly for me!"

Immediately, a warrior with silver helmet and silver armor came over with a gun, bowed his hands to the king, turned around and took the red-tasseled white wax gun, and put it on the eunuch's throat.

The eunuch was ruthless, closed his eyes, and ran straight towards the point of the gun. The warrior reacted very quickly. The tip of the gun was thrown on the eunuch's face, the eunuch was caught off guard, and his hands were tied behind his back again. When he became unstable, he fell on the soft bed in the phoenix chariot, bounced a few times, and fell limp ground, did not move.

The valet's expression changed drastically, and he stopped the king and said, "Your Majesty, your majesty should not look at the filthy person, and ask the imperial physician to come and see him!"

The king's face was dark, he stood still, waved his hands and said: "The widow is not the one who can't see the dead or blood, and let the imperial doctor come and see if he is dead!"

If he died, it would be really cheap for him!Even the people behind the scenes didn't find out!

Zhuang Fan never thought that the person who arranged the phoenix chariot was so ruthless that he wanted to put Jin Shenggong directly to death. He thought that it would be insane to ask Jin Shenggong to suffer when he came back. Thinking that in an instant, someone died.

Zhuang Fan couldn't help reciting the Buddha's name in a low voice, twirling the beads quickly, and recited the mantra of passing away several times. The king heard it and said, "But you surprised the holy monk?"

Zhuang Fan shook his head and said: "The poor monk was reckless, he came up with a bad idea, and even got killed!"

The king caressed: "Is it the fault of the holy monk? If the holy monk didn't stop me, it would not be me who died at this time, but the people around me. Now only one sinner has died. Isn't it a blessing!"

Zhuang Fan sighed and fell silent. This matter of the palace was far more dangerous than he thought, and he shouldn't have messed with it in the first place.

Soon the imperial doctor came, and took out a lot of silver needles with small tweezers from the dead eunuch's body and the cushion on the phoenix chariot. If you die, look at the eunuch's ferocious expression and distorted body, I'm afraid it will be extremely painful when he dies.

Typical bad death.

Dying is painful, and after death is ugly.

When the king heard this, he was so angry that he was extremely angry. Instead, he calmed down and ordered people to take the phoenix chariot down for a thorough investigation to see if they could find any clues. Come out from behind.

After explaining it carefully up and down, the king was worried, so he turned around and asked Zhuang Fan: "Holy Monk, look at the widow, is there anything missing?"

Zhuang Fan didn't know whether to laugh or cry, he bowed together and said: "Your Majesty, poor monks and monks are really not good at these mundane things, but the poor monk watched, Your Majesty is tight-knit, if you want to come to evildoers, there will always be a day when they will show their true colors."