Rabbit's Murder Memories

The villa that Ji Ran let me live in is located in the middle of the mountain in the suburbs.

The villa has three floors, the first floor is the living room and kitchen, the second floor is the study room and bedroom, the third floor is the chess and card room, and all kinds of daily necessities and household appliances are also available, so there is no need to buy anything special.

Although I have a deep prejudice against Ji Ran, he actually treats me fairly well.He knew that the neighborhood was sparsely populated and the traffic was inconvenient, so he gave me a Mercedes-Benz two weeks later.He comes over every two or three days, sometimes stays overnight, and sometimes leaves right after finishing. In comparison, I actually paid very little for him.I just boiled hot water in advance after receiving his call, filled the ridiculously large bathtub, opened the refrigerator, and cooked a few dishes for him.

What surprised me was that he wasn't too picky about what to eat, but his need for that was extremely strong.His needs are not like the desires of normal people, but like some compulsory needs, just like addicts have for drugs and vampires have for blood.Sometimes I feel that he has already climaxed many times, and he is already overwhelmed, his legs are trembling, so I persuade him to forget it, but he insists that I continue to do it until both of us are tired.

Soon after I moved into the villa, I gradually felt that my body was too much to bear, and at the same time, my mind was too much to bear.

Although I am on top, although I am dominant, I feel that I am not an attacker at all, but more like a subject, or more like a genital that can walk upright.What he needs is not a human being at all, but a machine that can understand human speech and adjust its posture to suit him. Moreover, this machine can't be broken, and it's better that it will never have a warranty period.

Although I don't want to admit it, I know better than anyone in my heart that I'm just a plaything for him, and if I get tired of playing with it, he will throw me away sooner or later.

·

Everything is going on and changing slowly.

I don’t know when it started, but the little affection I had for him slowly turned into hatred after his unrestrained love for Longyang again and again; I began to think of Miyuki more and more frequently, thinking of In the past, I remembered the humiliation and remorse, and my hatred for this world, which had been dormant for a long time, also gradually became deep-rooted when I looked at the barren courtyards around me again and again. Finally, I picked up the dagger again and gave it to me. Miyuki sent a photo.

I raped her in her car, and I found out later that she was still a virgin.When I entered her again, I had no pleasure at all. The harder I raped her, the more sad I felt, as if I was raping another self.

What surprised me even more was that from the beginning to the end, she did not resist, and obeyed like a girl with five hundred nights.

After I ejaculated, I lay on the ground exhausted, and suddenly cried for no reason. I suddenly thought of that man again, and remembered that night ten years ago.

That night I pushed Miyuki down on the hotel bed. I thought it was the beginning of an unforgettable experience, but I didn't expect that she would suddenly go crazy and slap me.

After she rushed out, I lay alone on the bed for a long time. I felt that I thought about many things in the past, and those memories were full of poverty, vulgarity, nagging and despair.When I washed my face and walked out of the room, I was still in a daze, feeling like everything was in a dream.

I touched my hot face and returned the room that almost used up half a month of my living expenses.Out of the gate of the hotel, I walked down the street alone in a daze. I passed a bar and walked in. Before entering the door, I looked at the signboard of the bar, which seemed to say the word "tea horse".

I sat near the bar at the bar, sipping whiskey after glass, and came out of the bathroom one time, feeling a little strange because I didn't meet a woman on the way.

But this kind of doubt is fleeting, whether there are women in this bar is none of my business, I returned to my seat, ordered more advanced foreign wine, and did not leave the bar until I had spent all my living expenses for this month.

I felt dizzy after taking two steps on the street, and felt that the ground was crooked no matter how I stood. Just when I was about to fall down, a man in a black suit came over suddenly and held me in his arms.He has medium-length hair and is described as thin. He feels warm when he smiles, like the sun in the afternoon of June.

He asked me, "Are you okay?"

"It's okay, who are you?"

He smiled and helped me into the hotel just now. The room he opened happened to be the one I left in the evening.

I was thrown on the bed by him, he took off my pants, I could faintly feel what was going to happen, I waved my hand, trying to push him away, but I was drunk, and in the end, everything ended It's all in vain.

He finally got into me, but his work was very good, when to be aggressive and when to stop, he was very good at grasping, and in the end, I actually felt very comfortable.

The next morning, before he left, he threw a wad of money on the bed and said:

"I'm sorry, I was in a hurry to go out today, and I forgot to bring money."

He spoke very softly and had a nice voice, but his calm tone made me feel that I was like a duck, and it was only right for me to be prostituted by him.

"I'm going to sue you." I said viciously.

He stood at the door, turned his head in surprise, and then smiled contemptuously:

"You sue me, why? Are you hurt?"

After speaking, his footsteps gradually disappeared outside the door.

Enduring the severe pain from my buttocks, I crossed my legs and walked step by step to the bathroom. I tidied myself up in front of the mirror before going downstairs to the school.

Back at school, I went directly to the library, found the "Criminal Law", and turned to the criminal standard of rape.

After I closed the "Criminal Law", I couldn't help crying.

·

When I walked out of the library slowly, trembling, the sky was rising and the surroundings were empty and quiet. I suddenly remembered the wad of money in my pocket. I rummaged through my pocket, took out the money, and counted. Ten, exactly one thousand, exactly my living expenses for one month.

Facing the bright rising sun, I suddenly laughed, this is probably God's will!

In the end, God's will guided me and told me that I was finally no longer a normal man.

The next day, I went to the flea market to buy a dagger, polished it with a whetstone, and kept it in my arms all the time, and ran to that bar when I had nothing to do.

I want to find that man, I want to get revenge on him, not for anything else, but to take back my dignity as a normal man.

Time went round and round, one year, two years, three years passed, until I graduated, but that man never appeared again.

After graduating from that school, I didn't go to other cities because I still have heart knots.

I took a casual job with a local insurance company, and the pay was low, but good enough for me to drink at the Tea Horse Bar.

This world is so wonderful, the more I want to move forward, the more I am pushed to the opposite side. I don't know when it started in the past, even my sexual orientation has slowly changed.

After clubbing for a long time, I gradually had "friends", but they were all "boyfriends".Because "Tea Horse" is a BL bar, there are no women.

·

One day in April this year, I came to the "Tea Horse" as usual, ordered a cup of Jager, and drank it slowly by myself.

I just drank this kind of wine recently, it is as thick as syrup, with some bitterness of traditional Chinese medicine, which is similar to my usual mood.

The TV in the bar was on, and an entertainment news was playing on it. It was a wealthy wedding, Miyuki was the happy bride, and I also knew the handsome groom. He often came to this bar, but we never talked.Because he sat in booths, and I sat in scattered seats, with different grades and different classes.

That night, I was also drunk, lifted up, and treated as a plaything, but this time it was not one, but five.

They hung my limbs from the radiator with ropes and tortured me from early morning till dawn.

I know the person they are leading, nicknamed "Dragon King", a well-known bisexual in the circle, and a master of pulling boxes to find meat.

He has a profound background, even if accidents happen occasionally, he can always find someone to settle them. He is a character that no one dares to provoke.

In wave after wave of despair and pain, I didn't wait for rebirth, I just waited for surrender.

With tears in my eyes, I managed to raise my head from the rope net, and I said to him:

"I was wrong...Master."

The corner of his mouth opened, and he suddenly laughed. The four people beside him laughed at the same time, and I laughed too.

It turns out that there is only such a step between happiness and pain.

It turns out that I have been muddled in the torrent of life for so many years, just because I have not yet chosen to surrender in the face of rights and wealth.

·

After I raped Miyuki, she said that she would not call the police. If this was just a plot in the novel, I would not believe it anyway, but at that time, I really believed her.

It turned out that my judgment was not wrong, but even so, it doesn't mean that I can let her go.

"Because of her, I lost everything." After all, I lived with this thought for a full ten years.I used to hate her to the bone, and now dealing with her has become my only joy.

One night after a week, I knew that Ji Ran was on a business trip, so I called her out and asked her to kneel on the stones in the bed of the Lengshui River. I pulled her hair and kept stalking her from behind.

I looked at her constantly swaying waist and limbs, and listened to her confused and mournful moaning. Finally, I grabbed her throat with my hands, and felt the pulsation from the depths of her body. Suddenly feel - we are finally equal.

She lay on the stone and raised her head, with tears shining in the corners of her eyes, like a river rushing under the moon.

I patted her white ass with my hand, "I don't want to be your lover, let me be your master!"