Tang riddles

The history book "Historical Records" handed down by Sima Gong records the story of Lin Xiangru returning to Zhao and Lian Po taking the blame.Up to now, it has become a well-known educational story known to all women and children.But for a person who has been in the officialdom and used to intrigues for many years, Shen Sui saw another side in Li Jinyue's actions.

She may have come to apologize sincerely, because she really felt guilty.However, the use of such a high-sounding form as "pleading guilty" made Shen Sui see the helplessness and hesitation deep in her heart.

how do I say this?

Shen Sui knew very well that Li Jinyue was the one who hated formalities the most, in other words, she was the one who hated hypocrisy the most.She never liked those ready-made routines.For example, "pleading guilty to a thorn", this is a ready-made routine of "pleading guilty" that has been handed down since the Warring States Period.

The first person to do this may be praised by such beautiful words as "knowing mistakes can be corrected", "magnanimity", "knowing the general and not sticking to the details", "general and minister harmony".But then, the second imitator, the third imitator, gradually changed their taste.A and B had grievances, but A swallowed their anger, and B later decided to reconcile with A for some reason, so he pleaded guilty, and A had to forgive him because of his face and other people's tongue, and the two reached a superficial reconciliation.

So it became a play to take the blame and plead guilty.After later generations made it, it became a kind of persecution, a kind of routine.In this routine, everyone's actions are stipulated, and you have to follow the rules. If you don't follow the rules, you will be humiliated, overwhelmed by the mouths of all beings, and even recorded by the historian. For a sum, even future generations will be tired.

Today, Li Jinyue pleaded guilty, and her deep motivation may have the meaning of routine Shen Sui in it.I came to the door with a thorn, you should know how to do it, we can play a good show together, it will be good for you and my reputation.

However, Shen Sui also understands that this deepest and darkest thought is not the main cause, but the best solution that Li Jinyue subconsciously chose to get rid of the current predicament. This may be the result of her growing up in the court. Her instinct to be wise and protect herself may also be a strategy offered to her by the counselors raised in her mansion.It was indeed best for both of them to do so, so she chose to do so.

But in this way, doesn't it just show her helplessness and hesitation?She has to use the routine she hates the most to protect herself, isn't it the best embodiment of her current helpless situation?

Shen Sui has seen through the routine, it's not important, she will of course cooperate with her to perform the play well.However, she also asked for the most real thoughts in her heart. After this incident, she had to figure out what kind of attitude she had towards herself, the maidservant, the three of them, and even her own future.Because it is related to their future choices and destiny.

So after experiencing the initial surprise, she remained silent for a long time before picking up the cane behind her, and slapped her left shoulder fiercely, saying:

"You owe me, pay it off, get up, let's talk."

Li Jinyue pursed her lips and stood up, Shen Sui saw her staring at him intently, her familiar pair of long and narrow phoenix eyes gradually turned red, just like when she was a child.Shen Sui couldn't see her crying, when she cried, Shen Sui's nose also became sore.But she suppressed her tears, raised a smile, and found a topic as if nothing had happened:

"The princess is here today, but Mr. Xu Yujie gave you an idea?"

"After discussing with Yujie, I decided to plead guilty. Don't mind, Mr. Shen. It's good for us." Li Jinyue lowered her head. She felt ashamed of her behavior, as if her guilt was getting deeper and deeper.

This was the second time she called Shen Sui by "Mr. Shen" after entering the door today. Shen Sui probably understood that she didn't want to reveal Shen Sui's true identity right now, even if it was just the two of them alone.This may be a protective layer, or a buffer layer, and it is also one of the conditions for them to maintain a relatively relaxed and calm atmosphere to continue the dialogue.Once the layer of tulle is really pierced, it is inevitable to talk about the past.And what happened back then is probably not what Li Jinyue is willing to talk about now, let alone what Shen Sui wants to talk about.

They unanimously chose to put the past aside and only talk about the present.And the unbearable past will not be shelved forever, but will be revealed at the most appropriate time.By then, I'm afraid it will be the end of everything.

"Mr. Xu is a man of insight. The princess should listen to her advice more in the future. Only by discussing everything can a balance be achieved, and gains and losses can be measured."

"Of course, I will listen to Yujie's words. But I want to listen to yours even more." Li Jinyue said slowly, with inexplicable grievances in her tone, like a child who is cautiously acting like a baby in front of his parents after making a mistake.

Shen Sui smiled, and said slowly:

"The princess doesn't dislike me, I will do my best."

"Chi...Bo Zhao, don't mind if I call you that, Mr. Shen."

"Princess, please."

"This time, I really don't know how to make up for Mr. Bozhao. Jinyue couldn't eat or sleep every day, and suffered for several days, so I came here with trepidation. I am also willing to assist Jinyue to realize... ideal." When she said the word "realize", she paused, as if hesitating which word should be followed, and finally, she used the word "ideal".

"Princess, who do I think I am? I, Shen Bozhao, go in the fire and return in the snow. I haven't changed my original intention for seventeen years. How can I be cut off by you with a sword. Your fate is entangled with me. In this life, It must be hard to let go, you have to be aware of it." Shen Sui said calmly, but her plain tone seemed to be the most powerful hand, easily tearing off the mask of Li Jinyue's strong spirit.

Her tears fell instantly.He stood there in a panic, with his head down.Slowly, grief welled up and she couldn't help herself, so she kept raising the back of her hand to wipe her tears, sobbing repressedly, like a child who dared not cry loudly.Sobbing and hesitating, he grabbed Shen Sui's sleeve, as if afraid that she would lose it, wanted to say something, but he was so choked up that he couldn't speak.

Shen Sui's eyes filled with tears, but he laughed out, teasing her with a crying tone:

"Why are you crying? You're crying so ugly, your eye circles are as red as a rabbit's."

The tone of her mouth was not kind, but Shen Sui reached out his hand to roughly wipe away her tears, all the tears rubbed on her hand, but she didn't dislike it.Li Jinyue couldn't bear it anymore, took a step forward, hugged her fiercely into her arms, and cried out loudly, the tears were like a floodgate.She hugged him so hard that it seemed as if she wanted to rub Shen Sui into his bone marrow.

"It hurts, bastard, Li Maomao, you are pressing on my wound..." Shen Sui couldn't hold back his tears any longer, and said with a sob.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." She mumbled, the right side loosened, but the left side hugged even tighter.

"I hurt, really hurt... Li Maomao..." The body hurts, but the heart hurts even more.

"sorry Sorry……"

"You bastard, Li Maomao...you are a bastard..."

"sorry Sorry……"

Later, they couldn't speak, and there was only the sound of sobbing and sobbing in the room, and her voice was intertwined with her voice, one after another.Until the sobbing gradually subsided, and the room became quiet.

Outside the window, the second spring rain in Luoyang came. Unlike the first rain, it was so violent and torrential. This rain was quiet and silent, as fine as silk, and moistened everything peacefully.The leaves of the plantains that Shen Sui raised by the pond in his backyard were slowly covered with raindrops, gradually rolling into a huge one, and hanging down.It happened to hit the back of a flower turtle lying on the small stone island in the middle of the pond, breaking a crystal flower.The flower tortoise stuck its small head out of its shell, looked at a pair of red koi swimming in the pond with mung bean-like eyes, slowly moved its four legs, and jumped into the pond with a "plop".

"Princess Tangtang, my nose and tears covered me all over, and I was so dirty." After an unknown amount of time, Shen Sui said with a faint nasal voice.

"Mr. Bo Zhao doesn't dislike it, and Jin Yue doesn't care about it." She actually became cheeky.

"You say you, say you are a rabbit, I really didn't wrong you. On the surface, you look innocent and honest, but you are always bullied. In your bones, you are stubborn and fierce. When you are anxious or sad, you will have red eyes. The six relatives don't recognize me anymore."

"What you said is that the rabbit bites people when it's anxious." Li Jinyue smiled.

"Don't bite me anymore, I really can't stand it." Shen Sui said with a smile.

The two smiled at each other.

"So, princess, I have a question, I hope the princess will answer truthfully and according to what she thinks in her heart." Shen Sui looked into Li Jinyue's eyes and said, "Princess, what do you think about me marrying a lotus maid?"

Li Jinyue paused for a long time, unable to utter a word.

Shen Sui sighed, and said slowly: "Let me ask another question, Princess, do you really love Lotus Maid?"

Li Jinyue lowered her head, shook her head slowly, and said:

"I do not know."

Shen Sui didn't answer.

"In the past, it's not that I haven't thought about this issue. She also told me more than once, that I am obsessed with her, not love. But I can't listen to it. I don't think so. I really love her." Her..." At this point, she couldn't help but look up at Shen Sui, and seeing her calm face, she continued, "I had lust/lust for her, and I felt impulsive, and I think that's unshakable evidence But... I don't understand, it seems that the feeling is a transformation of some kind of thinking, I can't say it. I am aware of this, but I forcibly ignore it, because I am afraid to think about it, and if I think about it, maybe the other end It is endless nothingness.

Mr. Bozhao, I might as well say frankly that I don't know what it means to love someone. It seems that I have never loved anyone since I was a child.

I went to the frontier at the age of 14 and married Hachiro at the age of 16. I know very well that I don't love Hachiro. He and I are more like brothers and sisters, and we are partners with a tacit understanding.Moreover, we have never had sex.He has someone he loves, he has a concubine, he loves that concubine, and I don't mind at all.I and his concubine are very good friends.

After Hachiro left, I was alone, and I was not very sad, at least not the kind of heartbreaking pain of the death of a loved one.It wasn't until my mother passed away that I fell into great grief.My mother is the only motivation for me to persevere for so many years. All my efforts are for her. In order to give her a more comfortable life and a more dignified position, I can sacrifice everything I have.But she just left, and my whole body seemed to be empty, and I didn't know what I was living for.Then at that time, she appeared, she was different from her childhood, more gentle, more beautiful, as if with a taboo attraction, attracted me to fall.

I thought that was love in the world, but now it seems that it is not.These days, I think a lot, but more and more confused.But there is one thing I understand..." She raised her eyes and looked into Shen Sui's eyes,

"You came back, I don't seem to love her that much. It's very strange, it seems that when I practice swords, I focus on stabbing the most perfect sword, but once an external force is added, my strength is scattered. Only It's just a matter of a moment. So, isn't it too abstract?"

Shen Sui shook his head.

Li Jinyue pondered for a moment, then slowly said: "Then, sir, maybe I can give you an answer now. I don't love her, what I love is just the best past I have ever had. She carries a beautiful past on her body." The phantom of the three of us carries the most sincere feelings of the three of us, and it also carries my longing for love, the passion/desire I have suppressed for many years, and even my longing for my mother. Too many things are mixed together to confuse my vision. "

She suddenly smiled bitterly: "In the end, I still have never loved anyone."

"It's okay, start by loving yourself first. To love yourself, you need to be worthy of yourself. Princess, tell me, can you still fulfill the vow you made back then?"

Li Jinyue's face became serious: "Shen Bozhao has never forgotten his original intention in seventeen years, so is Li Maomao. Mr. does not fail me, and I will never fail Mr.."

Shen Sui smiled, stretched out his little finger on his right hand, Li Jinyue also smiled and hooked it, and they both said in unison:

"The raise of the pull hook must not be changed for 100 years!" Their thumbs overlapped.

The author has something to say: When writing this chapter, I cried like a dog for no reason.Since Shen Sui appeared on the stage, he has only cried twice, once when he met Lotus Maid, and once when he met Mao Mao.You may be able to compare the descriptions of these two acquaintances. This is the difference between love and friendship.

"I, Shen Bozhao, go in the fire and return in the snow. I have not changed my original intention for seventeen years." Chishi, this will be your famous saying from now on.

already edited.