I really don't love you anymore [Entertainment]

The author has something to say: Premise assumption: If they had never met, what would their life be like?

Episode [-]: "If We Never Met"

(Song Limo No.1 called the angle of view)

My name is Song Li, and my character in this article is the heroine of the most common urban pseudo-underworld killer novel.

Before I was eight years old, my name was not Song Li. I didn't know what my name was before I was eight years old.

My life experience is quite legendary.

My memory began one morning when I was eight years old. I opened my eyes and found myself in a strange environment. A group of people in white coats who looked like doctors surrounded me, and there were many beds around me. , in every bed there is a child, a child as old as me.

The room was full of noise, and other children, perhaps because of the fear of the unfamiliar environment, let out heart-piercing screams. Some even wanted to get out of bed and escape, but they were firmly pressed on the bed.

I looked at all this absurdity, and felt a little unreal.

The person who looked like a doctor asked me if I felt any discomfort?

I shook my head, there was nothing wrong with me other than not remembering anything.

A man in his 40s came in. The man was well maintained. He looked low-key and humble. All the doctors bowed to him. The doctor next to me went to talk to the man. I heard my doctor point out She told me that she was the best seedling in this batch.

In fact, I wanted to ask him how he saw it, but I still didn't ask. The man smiled and nodded, looking very satisfied. He came over and stroked my hair.

I asked him, "Who are you?"

The man said, "I am the godfather."

I asked him again, "Then who am I?"

The godfather said, "From today onwards, your name will be Song Li."

From that day on, my name is Song Li.

I know that I am in a place called the organization. The name is very careless. It is called the organization. Their base camp is in J city in country C, on the edge of the border, and there is a large lake near the organization's base camp.

According to the doctor who took care of me, their organization buys a lot of children from various channels every year. They have many channels. He said that I should have been trafficked and sold here by human traffickers. Most of the children here That's how it all came about.

The organization bought so many children in, trained them, and gradually trained them into a qualified killer for their own use.

Sounds cool right?

Actually not cool at all.

We have an assessment period every month. I have a total of 58 children in this period, and one or two will die almost every month.

We children had no communication before, and any communication was not allowed. I could only talk to the doctor who took care of me.

But I know that those children will become fewer and fewer, and there may be only three left in the end, or even fewer.

I started to feel uneasy and I confide in the doctor.

Maybe the doctor saw that I was too young, and I was tortured every month. It was so pitiful. He often chatted with me. He was the person I trusted the most in the entire organization.

But then, he died.

One night I went back to bed after practice and found his dead body lying peacefully on my bed.

The godfather and a group of men in black stood by the bed and watched me.

I asked him why he killed the doctor, and the godfather said that he told you too much, and you told him too much, which does not conform to our rules here.

I pulled out a gun from under my pillow and pointed the black muzzle at him.

The moonlight was pouring through the window, and everyone around the godfather pointed guns at me.

I looked at the godfather with tearing eyes, as if looking at an enemy.

The godfather smiled, and he waved his hands to let his subordinates put down their guns. He walked up to me and rubbed my hair with his hands.

He said, you are a good boy.

There is no live ammunition in my gun, because the organization does not allow children who have not been trained to have such lethal weapons.

Later, I was raised by the godfather, and I watched the godfather deal with organizational affairs, kill traitors, and continue to cultivate wave after wave of killers, just like cutting leeks.

Looking back now, that doctor may be the only person I have ever loved in my life.

The organization taught me a lot of things, such as astronomy and geography, the history of the art of war, and the principles of firearms. I have to learn everything, and I must learn everything well.

I was around the godfather, and the godfather occasionally told me stories about the origins of the organization, their hierarchy, the future, and occasionally a woman.

I learned to be indifferent to emotions by my godfather, I became indifferent and indifferent, and became obedient. I completed every task my godfather gave me, with precision and speed, and I would never care about anything else about others.

In this organization, strength comes first, and everything else is nonsense.

When I was 16, I had a chance to get out of the organization.

That mission required a young girl to break into the interior, gain their trust, steal some information, and then kill someone.

The employer said that he wanted the Qu family to experience the feeling of being betrayed.

Qu Jia should be the unlucky mission target who was targeted.

But I didn't care, because the godfather still didn't let me go out in the end, and another task happened to be picked up at that time. The task was given to another girl.

As for the outcome of this task, I don't care.

After a year or two, the time has become blurred in the organization, and I can't remember exactly how long it was before I saw this girl again in the organization. I don't care about the outcome of this mission, but Now that the person has returned, it means that the task should have been completed.

I don't know why, but there is a sense of loss and sadness in my heart.

I haven't felt this emotion for many years, and it feels a little novel for a while.

I think, maybe it's because I lost a chance to leave the organization for a long time.

My life is actually very boring. This cool-sounding profession is really not that cool. Most of the time, killers are like a group of dogs raised by the organization. The godfather is like a dog walker, who has to take the dog out to relax from time to time.

And this group of dogs has no right to freedom, because their hands are covered with blood, and there is no place to take them in except organizations.

Killing became a habit later on. Human life is like weeds in my eyes. Killing one person or ten people makes no difference in my eyes. I felt happy and peaceful, and I was numb to blood. After the task was completed, I was used to understatement to wipe the blood on my body, and then quickly left the scene.

It may be because I made enough money for the godfather, and the godfather rarely let me go out to do missions after I was 25 years old.

After all, the job of a killer is a job of youth. As people grow older, the response of human bones and muscles will decline. Even if I am the heroine of this article, I can't turn my back on my youth by opening a cheat.

In addition, the godfather intended to train me to be his successor, so he began to keep me in the organization and by his side for a long time.

I can read all the books on his bookshelf, and I can read important or unimportant documents on his desk.

I began to understand how large our organization is, and we help many customers do all kinds of business, do anything for money, and use any means.

The godfather began to teach me how to manage the entire organization, ensure the internal stability of the organization, how to firmly control people's hearts, and kill some people in exchange for maximum benefits.

The godfather said that a small explosive device was implanted under the neck of everyone in the organization, and he held all the lives of the people in the organization tightly in his hands.

I don't feel anything in my heart.

This is indeed something the godfather would do, it's normal.

The Godfather said that no one dislikes money and power. Desire is the foundation of catalyzing people. Everyone will kneel at the feet of desire in people's hearts. No one is a saint.

I couldn't deny it, and turned another page of the book in my hand.

The godfather said, in fact, in your group of children, and even in your next group of children, there are still people who are as capable as you. Do you know why I choose you?

I don't really care about the reason, after all, since he has already chosen me, as for his psychological journey in the middle, I really don't care at all.

I don't care about anything that has nothing to do with me, even some things about myself, I don't care too much.

This is the habit formed in the organization over the years.

Curiosity will kill the cat.

But I still want to give the godfather a face, I said, why?

The godfather said, because in your group of children, others find that they don’t remember anything, and they are still in a strange place. The first reaction is to cry and make noise. Only you are motionless. The doctor asked you if you felt uncomfortable. You didn't respond, saying that you felt fine.

I think you are suitable for our line of work. You are calm and rational, not afraid of danger, and children are interesting.

I didn't speak.

The godfather said again, did you like that doctor, the one I killed.

I thought about it, probably not.

Such a thing as love is simply a dream in our place.

Excessive emotional exchanges are unnecessary, let alone love.

After all, the godfather has a little kindness in nurturing and teaching me. I asked him, what are you going to do in the future?

The godfather was about to leave the organization. He said that he was tired after all these years, and since the successor had been found, there was no need to stay any longer.

He said that he might bring a sum of money and find a remote small village abroad to live in. He has too many enemies, so it's better not to be too ostentatious.

I said, this is indeed the truth.

Later, the godfather really abdicated and handed over the top position to me.

Later, I heard that the godfather died. He died in a small village in country A. A bullet passed through his temple and killed him with a single shot. He died on his bed. He should have been killed in his sleep. He seemed to have died quite peacefully.

It was exactly the same as when the doctor's body was lying on my bed.

Because I sent someone to kill him.

He killed the only person I've ever loved in my life, and I'm born with a grudge, a bad temper, and only know that one life is worth one life.

He shouldn't believe me, let alone tell me where he will go.

The godfather made us live without emotion, did not allow us to have any emotional communication, and even the education provided to us was not mixed with any emotional views.

But love is natural.

But he himself fell in love with me when he left the stage at the end.

I have the lifeblood of everyone in the organization, just like what the godfather told me back then, everyone has a small bomb under their necks, and I have it too, but when I was the leader, someone helped me put this The bomb was taken out.

No one can threaten me anymore.

As the heroine of a pseudo-underworld killer article, I have gotten to this point. If it is a normal long-form article, then I should take the organization that already belongs to me to open up a bigger world and develop the organization even more. grow.

But I didn't.

We are an organization, and we are not the only killer organization. There is still competition among various industries, and our industry naturally has it too.

In my second year of taking over the organization, I did something that shocked the entire killer industry.

I detonated the small bomb under the necks of everyone in the organization.

It was a normal afternoon, nothing out of the ordinary, the organization was turning over normally, the money was rolling into my pockets, and I had all the rights.

I am not crazy, this is something I have planned for a long time.

I may be a born actor, and I can definitely do very well in the entertainment industry.I manage the organization like a godfather. People in the organization respect and fear me, and no one doubts me.

From the moment I saw the doctor die in front of me, I counted the ending.

I have gained the trust of the godfather, and even gained a little affection from the godfather. Everyone in the organization believes that I can lead them to a better future.

But I killed them all.

And I don't regret it at all.

No one knows, I have always been a very extreme person, darkness and killing have never disappeared in my inner world, but every time I occasionally think of the face of the doctor at night, I toss and turn, vowing to make everyone here This pays a price.

When I was young, I was paranoid and fierce, and I was born free, unwilling to be restrained, and I didn't like others to owe me.

Now the paranoia in my character has not subsided at all, but has become more and more restless.

I feel like I don't belong here.

That afternoon, I stepped over countless corpses in the base camp, and the blood stained the whole floor red, and there was blood everywhere.

No one is alive but me.

I left the base camp, lit a fire, and watched the houses behind me burn in the raging fire, completely wiped out.

I walked to the side of the lake.

My birth and death may have been a mistake in the first place. I don't know why I live, and dying is not so terrible after all.

No emotion in the world can keep me.

I cut my wrist with a dagger, and blood flowed slowly from my wrist.

I walked into the lake slowly, and the lake water slowly turned red, like the brightest flowers blooming in the cold lake water.

I greet death as if returning to my final resting place.

END

(Qu Yiling No.1 called the angle of view)

My name is Qu Yiling.

I was born in a very wealthy family. In today's terms, the family has mines and is extremely rich.

Well, just kidding, my family does not have a mine, and if there is a mine, my family cannot make money. My family has a company.

A family business, the kind that can be ranked among the top circles in City B.

I was born with a golden spoon in my mouth, and two years later, my brother was born too.

My younger brother is much better than me and likes to do business.

And I am not interested in this business at all, the responsibility of inheriting the family's burden naturally falls on my younger brother's shoulders, I have everything I can do, anyway, I just have to eat and drink as much as I have, and I don't have much ambition.

My parents expressed their heartache for my lazy behavior, but they couldn't do anything about it. They couldn't force me to do things I didn't like, and then they let it go.

That's right, my family is not only rich, but my parents are also enlightened. That's how I am lucky, a little bit.

I think I may be the heroine with the script of Sweet Pet Xiaoyan. After all, I am rich and beautiful, gentle and kind, loved by my parents, and my younger brother is capable and responsible and can inherit the family business. The only shortcoming is probably being gay.

I don't know what else I need in my life other than a man who loves me deeply.

I originally thought that one day, the man who was destined to love me in my life would appear in my life, allowing me to finish my sweet pet Xiaoyan script and welcome the beautiful He and the beautiful fairy tale that will never be mentioned. And the trivial life after marriage.

I originally thought so, until one day, I found out that what I took was not a sweet pet Xiaoyan script, but a sad urban ethics script.

When I was 21, I adopted a 16-year-old girl.

Her parents died in a car accident, and I happened to pass by, so I couldn't bear it, so I sent her to the hospital, and then brought her back home to raise her.

I later learned that I had raised a great scourge for myself.

It also starts with my family doctor.

My family doctor is my mother's elder brother, my cousin, who practices Chinese medicine, because my mother has been in poor health since she gave birth to our two siblings, so she needs Chinese medicine to take care of her.

Then my mother's condition got worse and worse.

Still later, she died.

We didn't know until much later that it was done by my uncle, our family doctor.

The traditional Chinese medicine he prescribed has been dragging my mother's body, but he can't wait to see my mother's death, that 16-year-old girl is actually a killer, after living in my house for more than a year, she took the opportunity to kill me Mother, and then quietly left my home.

I don't know where that girl went, but it's true, I never saw her again.

As a person, people always say that I am soft-hearted. I will pick up any cats and dogs I see on the road, or send them to pet rescue stations.

The first time I picked up a person, I killed my own mother.

After all the dust settled, my uncle was imprisoned and sentenced to death.

And I lost my mother.

I complain, I hate, but it's useless, we can only try our best to make up for it.

My father never went to marry another woman, but he was also getting more and more busy. He disappeared from morning to night every day. When I saw him at home, he was looking at the photos of my mother before she was alive.

My mother's death had a huge impact on the family business, and soon my family established a marriage for me.

Although my father has also asked my opinion, but I have always done everything and have no opinion.

Although I have been in love several times over the years, I have never met someone who must be together.

I don't know what love is like.

I don't care about my marriage, and I don't care about my future spouse.

If it can help the family, that is naturally the best.

So I got married.

My husband is a business friend of mine, and those who can marry the Qu family are all our friends.

It’s okay for a friend to become a lover. The wedding is very grand, and there are many people who come. The dress is a high-end custom-made dress, which is said to be in the millions. I don’t remember clearly, after all, I don’t care about these things.

I don't even care who my husband is, how could I care about these details.

Our wedding was held in a church in China, and there were a lot of guests. They were all well-known figures in the business circle, and they were also friends in the circle of our husband and wife. We all knew each other.

All of this was as if rehearsed. I was wearing a white wedding dress with countless diamonds inlaid on it. The veil was so long that it dragged the floor, supported by two flower girls.I also wore a pair of white gloves, like every happy newlywed wife, holding my husband's arm with a smile, and walked into the palace of marriage together with him.

The officiant asked me, whether in good times or bad times, rich or poor, healthy or sick, are you willing to know each other and stay with the groom by your side, and grow old together forever?

I even got a little distracted at the wedding and didn't react until my husband reminded me.

Then I realized that everyone was looking at me nervously.

For me and my husband's joint marriage, I think this vow is a bit funny.

After all we are brought together by power and money, our family group needs help, so I need a husband, he needs a wife, that's all.

I smiled and looked at my husband, under all eyes, and said, I do.

Life after marriage is uneventful.

My family business has received a large amount of working capital from my marriage, and the business situation has gradually improved. My husband likes me very much. He said that he liked me very much before, but it seems that I don’t like him at all. , But I didn't expect that by accident, I could marry me.

He said he felt very happy.

I smiled and said, I also feel very happy.

I manage the entertainment company under the name of our family business, which is called Linglong Film and Television. I have moved out of my home, but I will go home from time to time to see it. After all, my father is the only one in my family.

I often persuade my father to find a stepmother for me and my brother, and to find someone to accompany him.

But he refused, he said, he couldn't let go of my mother.

I feel a little happy, but more helpless and sad.

Since I was married after all, I moved out of the house to live with my new husband.

There is a cleaning lady who cleans the house every day. After I get home from get off work, I will cook a meal, and my husband will cook occasionally.

He is the most common kind of man in the current sweet pet article, gentle and considerate, knowledgeable, rich, and can cook a good meal.

But I'm not the heroine in the sweet pet article, because I don't love him.

I don't know when it started, my husband came home later and later.

I don't care too much where he goes at night, but I'll leave him a light, or warm up a good meal before bed.

I thought, if he worked overtime late and hadn't eaten when he came back, he could eat some to fill his stomach.

But I have a vague premonition.

As it turned out, my hunch was correct.

He cheated in marriage.

I returned home early from a business trip one day, and when I got home, there was a pair of ladies’ high-heeled shoes that did not belong to me on the shoe cabinet at the door. Several thoughts flashed through my mind.

I approached our bedroom quietly, and heard a woman's moan coming from the bedroom.

really.

My husband was naked and knelt on the ground begging for my forgiveness, but I was calm.

There are only zero and ten thousand derailments.

Later, when my husband saw that I had made up my mind to divorce, he yelled in front of me heart-piercingly. He said, you never loved me at all. I have known you for so many years, but you have never loved me.

I asked myself, indeed, I never loved him.

I told him, I will send the divorce property division opinion to your mailbox, and you should remember to read it later, I am leaving.

He knelt down and looked at me as if weeping.

He said, is it really impossible for us anymore?

I said, since you want love and I can't give it to you, then let's stop torturing each other, forget it.

I left my home.

No, from this moment, it is no longer my home.

I used to think that I was taking the script of sweet pet Xiaoyan in my life, but then I found out that I was taking the script of urban ethics that abused the body, tortured the heart and hurt the heart, and it was the kind without CP.

I am divorced.

And my father remarried.

My stepmother is a gentle and virtuous woman who treats us very well, and I am very relieved.

I asked my father why he figured it out again.

He said it was so lonely.

I nodded.

I understand him.

My stepmother gave me a younger sister. My family dotes on her very much, and I like her very much.

I looked at my father's smiling face again, both happy and sad.

Later, I left my company and went on a trip.

My younger brother complained a lot about this, but he took over my burden without complaint.

I went abroad and walked around for almost two years.

I have seen the most splendid aurora, I have seen the vast desert, I have looked at the starry sky and lamented the insignificance of life, and I have also seen the clear water rushing down from the snow-capped mountains of Gaochuan, nourishing all things.

Going around, I went back to the country.

I entered City J from the border of country E, and I heard that there is a virgin forest there, and there is a huge lake beside the forest.

Legend has it that the seven-color deer described in fairy tales has been seen in the forest.

Naturally, I don't believe in such fairy tales, but idleness is idleness. I haven't finished my transfer in China, and I'm not in a hurry to go home.

I really went to have a look at that lake.

There is nothing particularly strange about that lake. There is a huge grassland next to the lake, and the grassland extends out to the virgin forest that has no entry or exit.

I sat on the edge of the lake, looking at the calm lake.

I don't know why, but there is a huge sadness in my heart.

I feel like I'm missing something in my life that is the most important to me.

This feeling appeared out of nowhere, inexplicably, and my heart was churning. When I calmed down, I found that I had already walked a few steps into the lake.

The lake water wet my trousers, I was stunned, took a few steps back, and left the lake.

I thought, maybe this is an illusion, could it be that this lake still has some magic power?

I didn't think much, and didn't stay for long, so I left.

Later, I didn't even think about getting married again.

The world is so big, there are still many places I haven't seen.

As for the lake that made my heart palpitate, it was gradually forgotten by me and buried deep in my heart in the long years to come.

END